Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2358. page
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I really want to suck my best friends dick. I can't stop thinking about it. How do I make this happen?
Neither of us are gay
>>28880990
ask him as a joke and if he says yes as a joke, it isn't a joke.
>Neither of us are gay
Does he have a gf?
You can disguise yourself as a girl and create an entirely new persona for yourself
Then meet him "by chance" at some event or something like that
Start flirting with him and see where it goes from there
When he tries to reach for the cooch that doesn't exist, say that one time you were raped and the trauma prevents you from ever using your vagina again, but that you would be more than happy to suck him off as a substitute.
Spread the word Obama is dead.
>>28880930
What happened?
Originalufakerinu
>>28881058
supposedly heart attackoriginal
>>28880930
nothing, hoax
http://en.mediamass.net/people/barack-obama/deathhoax.html
>not beating your children when they are little shits
Why did this started being seen as bad parenting?
When the Jews took over public opinion.
>>28880899
>Why did this started being seen as bad parenting?
Because it violates the precious safespace of the kid getting beaten. It started to become unpopular (and even outlawed in some regions) shortly before the popular rise of the femnazi/LGBT meme.
Coincidence? I think not.
People who beat their kids dont know how to parent.
In a Walmart auto center. Ask me anything
>>28880867
where are you
m night famalam
>>28880867
How feasible would it be to get an upskirt shot?
>>28880904
Eastern America. Sitting in Walmart.
>tfw I like to take my clothes off before using the toilet.
If I make a mistake I have to tap my forehead seven times with my left hand or I'll have bad luck.
>>28880856
I lay toilet paper on the seat like lobster bibs before I take a shit.
In my own house.
>I dont wear any underwear when I sleep.
Sometimes I fart alot before bedtime and when I wake up, there are small shit stains on my sheets.
>Stand up when Im about to jizz
Somehow standing up when I cum feels so much better, but it has its risks. Once I was fapping to some really exciting stuff and when I was about to cum, I failed to grab a piece of paper that I usually have around when I cum and I jizzed on my keyboard. It wasnt fun to clean.
>tfw if we're born in India we'd been born a literal outcast
>kids in India can get jobs
>live in a first world country, you can't if you're not Chad or female or a minority
REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>28880788
Proud of those kids for working.
I lived in New Delhi for a couple years. Beggar kids are the fucking worst. I got swarmed by three or four of them in Connaught Place (somewhat ironically abbreviated as "CP" by locals). I don't know if they were trying to get to my pockets or thought I'd give them money if they were persistent, but two of them latched onto my legs. I had to walk twenty or thirty feet dragging a little boy and girl across the pavement for them to let go and scramble off.
They do have a sense of humor, though. When I was walking back to CP from another neighborhood, one of the kids recognized me and started laughing their ass off at their friend who I'd dragged.
But yeah, their lives suck. You can't compare your Robot bullshit with what these little fuckers deal with. Street kids have to pay bribes to the police; if they don't, they get locked up and forced to work for free as servants and stuff for cops.
>tfw we would've been indoctrinated into not being able to consider suicide without considerable mental resistance
>tfw there would be no way out
Does overdosing sleep pills actually kill you?
I don't know, only one way to find out eh?
>>28880769
What kind of sleeping pills are you talking about? If it's say ambien then if you drink heavily and maybe throw some opiods in then yea
on their own, almost impossible
combined with alot of alcohol, then yes you can die of respiratory depression quite easily
>norman neighbors in their mid 20's having a BBQ across the street
>people will be getting drunk and having sex there tonight
If the music plays for just a second after 10pm I will be calling in a noise complaint.
>>28880660
Go join them and have fun you weirdo
You sleep before 10pm? Faggot
>>28880676
>j-just join them!!
Are you literally a retard or do you enjoy saying dumb shit all day?
What music are you listening to right now?
I just have some Modest Mouse on.
>>28880631
Good old radionula. Look it up. Some funky tunes on there.
Shabazz Palaces
The Simpsons Wave
Today was driving my black bmw e39, threw a cup of coffe at this couple, they got really mad haha
nice one paypay
>>28880615
Sure you did, anon. We all think you're real cool pal
>>28880704
it's what elliot did you moron
>"I wouldn't have any sexual contact with a guy if we haven't been together for at least a year"
Can we dispel this fiction once and for all that couples that 'wait' are somehow better? If she doesn't want to sleep with you might number one, she doesn't want your genes.
Last night a girl was talking in this Skype chat, saying exactly that. It sparked a debate of sorts that is like to carry over onto here. What is better? Waiting to have sex or immediately getting to it?
Ideally, you'd notice each other, meet, go home, fuck like rabbits, lay in bed together and come to an unspoken sense of permanence. I realize this is unrealistic in the current year, but this wasn't unheard of decades ago. I feel like if she keeps you around and denies you sex you're basically just paying for all of her shit without anything in return. She wants to wait years with you, but she'd hop on Chad in a matter of seconds. Isn't it more genuine for your 'how'd you meet him' story to be "I saw him, knew he was the one. He dicked me like a champ the very same night and I've been here ever since."
Lastly, why do """""femanons""""" pretend they want to wait ridiculous amounts of time before having sex? Rhetorical, I know the answer. They know we want cute over hot, they know we want submissive conservative waifus, so emulating this faithful pure qt is just another way they can be regarded as more valuable, it's just another way they can gain more orbiters. See through their shit. They want to have sex immediately, but only if they deem you worthy of their eggs.
>tl;dr: Do you think that waiting before you have sex with your significant other is a noble act if self control or a glorified form of betabux cuckery?
Waiting for sex = cucked
>>28880583
>>28880612
>she isn't worth it if she doesn't sleep with you the first night
Is this what white people actually believe?
>>28880630
Night one is a bit of a meme, but if she denies you when you go for it, she doesn't respect you or find you attractive.
Let's be reasonable here, this doesn't always mean 'night one'
>normies ruiened the internet
I always hear this but normies have always been on the internet. Everyone knew was on the internet as long as it was around.
>>28880496
26 year old fag here.
I remember the internet being something normies only used to research shit for school or watch YouTube in small spurts.
Then MySpace gained traction and it got swarmed with people who didn't even know what a gif was.
Social media brought in all the normies.
>>28880496
>normalfags were on BBS in the 90s
They really weren't.
The longer the internet has been around the lower the barrier to entry has become.
You now have to know pretty much nothing about computers to use it. Your grandmother and her fucking dog are probably on facebook.
>>28880496
>Everyone knew was on the internet as long as it was around.
not at all
computers were expensive and tricky, most did not have them or even understand how to work them
internet was slow and a bitch to get set up/working
it was like that for years
as computers got easier to use, internet speeds increased, and computers got cheaper more and more people not only bought and used computers but also got online more and more
there was a time when spending your night on an image or message board meant you were probably not a normal average person. those times have changed since it seems everyone is online 24/7, either on their phones, their tablets, or whatever. always doing shit online and clogging up the information highways with their trash.
what do I do if I relate 100% to this film?
how can anyone live after seeing this?
What is his film about you've pequed my interest
>>28880487
man I cannot even describe it man. it is the most surreal epic I've ever seen. I ,as I'm sure many would, recommend it.
> Lying Figure trying to have a non Silent Hill thread
Get back to work, nigga
Who's your swallowfu?
What are they swallowing?
>>28880744
Swords
>>28880744
Pepto Bismol
Why do I wake up so infuriatingly angry some days? I'm so mad and I don't know why. I have no reason to, but I want to break something and I'm losing my mind.
>>28880272
maybe you have diabetes and ate too much sugar
Could be just a "morning thing". I usually feel really depressed when I wake up, but I know that it'll pass soon.
Every morning I want to die.
>>28880286
no
>>28880351
I usually wake up feeling pretty shitty, but today I was more mad than sad. Feels fucking weird.
