Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3793. page
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Calling all weird kids, gimme your stories. I'll go first.
>Be me
>Weird AF kid
>Liked to play with ants while on the playground
>Grew up midwest, there were a few huge ant nests on the playground
>Had a trick to it, I'd put a bowl over the top of a nest and a sugar packet off to one side to herd the ant colonies around.
>Sometimes, I'd push two colonies near each other, watch them fight in epic wars.
>Other times, I'd push the nests near classrooms, try to start infestations.
>No one understands be genius, they call me the bug kid
>Two bigger kids start tormenting me. They weren't popular or anything, but I think that was part of the reason. They wanted status.
>They throw soccer balls, etc. at me, but I either dodge them or ignore them.
>Just makes it worse
>One day, they throw a baseball instead of a soccerball.
>Hits me in the face. Knocks out my front teeth, busts my lip.
>They get suspended for two weeks, have to write me an apology letter.
>My parents are rich, not a big deal to get my face fixed, mostly just painful.
>They get back to school, teacher makes them apologize.
>Seems like everything is going to be cool now.
>Next, first recess in the morning, go to playground.
>All my nests are dead. The two assholes are laughing, saying they did the world a favor.
>They killed my ants. Came back after school and sprayed them with raid.
>I panic, wander around the playground.
>Find one lone nest under one of the portables, thank god.
>Relieved some ants are left, but fury in my bones.
>Bust my face? Fine. Kill my ants? There will be blood.
>Migrate the ant nest out to area by the swings.
>Challenge bullies to a fight after school by said swingset.
>I'm small and a bit scrawny, but I had three older brothers, my fighting style is ruthless.
>Bullies come after school.
>First one punches me in the mouth, breaking my two new crowns.
>Hurts like a bitch, but it shreds his hand up.
>I pretend to go down, curl into a ball.
>Cont below.
>>28003464
I'm here OP
I hope antbros win Tbh famalamapai-kun desu
Come on i'm impatient OP
>>28003464
BUG KID
BUG KID
BUG KID
BUG KID
BUG KID
BUG KID
>College is forcing me to get a roommate next year
Give me 1 (ONE) reason I shouldn't drop out because of this
I felt the same way. Mine turned out to be a shut in like me, eventually all we did was play vidya and get drunk together. Very comfy tbqh
>>28003448
You guys might start masturbating each other
>>28003448
I dormed in the Studio my second year.
So worth even my grades went up significantly.
Which would you want as your girlfriend?
>>28003411
None of them, they all look like insufferable normans.
The second one from the left.
Going with far left. She's white and not fake-baked or anorexic looking the far right one.
So what is with foot fetish?
never understood, like those are feet... fuckin smelly and dirty if not cleaned like RIGHT before.
>>28003407
Feet are just like any other body part. When they're well taken care of they can be sexy. Plus it's okay for them to be "bare" ala "naked". Also they're capable of pleasuring a penis.
>cute
>smell good
>ticklish
>accidentally walked in on son while he was getting a blowjob from his girlfriend
>>28003366
>son
how old are you?
Walked in on my wife's son while he was getting a blowjob from my wife
Embarrassing!
Walked in on my girlfriend while she was getting a blowjob from my son.
I just want to feel the body warmth of another person...
Anyone else here KHV?
>>28003348
I know right? Someone to hold those cold lonely nights...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbU3zdAgiX8
dream dream dream dream-
dream dream dream dream
when i want you in my arms
when i want you and all your charms
whenever i want you
all i have to do is dream
dream dream dream dream
when i feel blue in the night
and i need you to hold me tight
whenever i want you
all i have to do is dream
dream dream dream dream
i can make you mine
taste your lips of wine
anytime night or day
only trouble is geewhiz
i'm dreaming my life away
i need you so that i could die
i love you so and that is why
whenever i want you
all i have to do is dream
dream dream dream dream--
>>28003348
How have you NEVER held someones hand in your entire life? Im calling bullshit, buddyboi
>be bi
>remember in the 5th grade I used to hang out with this kid my age
>he has a buncha vidya so I visited often
>remember the first time I saw porn was because of him
>suddenly remember we used to jerk off to girls gone wild commercials together
>remember he tried playing gay chicken with me once
>tfw remembering your first gay experience
>>28003327
Eddie is that you, you bastard?
>>28003327
my first gay experience was going over to a friend and shoving playmobil characters up our foreskin, then dangle them about.
whoever dropped it first lost
>>28003327
i got my dick sucked when i was like 12. my dick was like really big and his was really small even tough he was like 14.
anyone interested?
Hello my dear bots, how do I cope with the fact I'll die alone?
pic related
>>28003317
you can fix that shit though, i've been there
>>28003317
You can raise cats or another type of pets
>>28003338
you think i haven't tried?
>make online dating profile
>too scared to fill it out or put a picture
Just fucking do it.
Post the questions here and how you wold you post it. We will help you make it less autistic.
>>28003671
if he cant post a pic and answer some questions he isnt going to message the girl. or boy going by the state of this board
>>28003726
"or boy" dude, just be glad it's not a cartoon pony.
>>28003286
Do you actually want to meet someone or just like the idea on your head?
If you do want it you'll have to get over it and be out there.
>but i can't do it
so seek help, dammit. Go to a shrink or something.
I want to fucking die. I'm at work and I'm sleep deprived as fuck so I just haven't felt right or been able to concentrate the whole day. This just happened. I was standing between two desks, watching a monitor, when in my peripheral vision I notice our secretary trying to get by me. She's a fairly old black woman who I don't think likes me. So trying to be nice, I attempt to move the chair that was between me and the desk so she could get by. I wasn't even thinking about what I was doing b/c I was paying attention to the computer and I'm fucking tired. Turns out, she wasn't trying to get by me, she wanted to sit down. I pulled the fucking chair out from under her. She fell HARD and it made a loud noise so everyone around heard it. Of course I apologized profusely and tried to explain myself, but I fucked up so bad. Also I'm the new guy here. I'm typing this on my phone in the bathroom cuz I'm a pussy and I'm too anxious to go back out.
>>28003258
Are you still in the bathroom?
>>28003716
that would be too funny, OP just spending half an hour inside the bathroom.
>>28003743
I wounder what's going on now
How do I get a blue ice gf?
stick you're dick in an ice onahole and chant the holy chant
You never will weeb faggot
>>28003249
Looks like somebody's been playing Megaman Starforce 3.
Worst thing you ever did to someone
>on backwoods videogame internet forum (smaller offshoot forum from the larger community videogame forum)
>one of the users is a tranny cunt who likes to make fun of me so i hate him/her/it
>one day some autist organizes a community day where we all play on xbox together
>i get on, and so does the tranny and some other autists
>seem to be going well, getting along with everyone including tranny
>so happy i send tranny a friend request over xbox
>next day get back on the forum and i see that the tranny made a post about how much of a loser i am to have sent it a friend request over xbox
>start seething in disbelief, and then pure rage
>not much i can do other than spaz out and damage control myself
>have to hold back anger until perfect moment
few weeks later
>tranny cunt cockface nigger lover makes a thread about how it cant pay its rent much longer and that its about to go homeless (had to live on its own after getting disowned by family for being a cunt)
>some white knight sets up a fundraiser on the larger forum where there's more people to get lots of donations to prevent the tranny cunt from going homeless
>the time has come
>create two dozen alt accounts and start spamming the thread with warnings that the fundraiser is a scam
>people see this and start scaring away from the fundraiser
>tranny and whiteknights getting nervous that they might not get enough money
>but that's not enough for me, so i also mass reported the thread on all my alts to get the thread taken down and deleted
>week or two later the dumb tranny cunt goes homeless and can no longer spend all day on the internet shitposting (literal definition of NEET, and now its homeless)
and that day everyone knew not to fuck with me anymore. i ask all of you to do same.
Link to one of the threads or it didn't happen.
>>28003234
it happened so long ago and i dont even browse there anymore so no
Friendship? Again?
Why do Millenials bash television, saying it is a waste of time, but have no trouble looking at their computers or smart phones all day?
Because people who bash those looking at their computers and phones all day, are the same people that look at TV all day.
It's just circlejerk of normies.
>>28003176
Too many ads in TV.
>>28003176
everything is a waste of time. its all meaningless. tv being meaningless is just a "symptom" of that
might as well waste your time doing something fun.
http://thoughtcatalog.com/anne-gus/2014/03/sorry-dudes-heres-5-reasons-that-girl-you-like-doesnt-want-anything-to-do-with-you/
The most honest article ever written by a female in regards to males.
Not giving them clicks, views or any hits
Screenshot the entire article or fuck off
Saged
I ain't klikin that shit nigga
go shill your blog somewhere else
>>28003168
>Living in patriarchy is not a walk in the park (whatever dimwit came up with that flagrantly ableist expression literally deserves a drink thrown in their face)
Wow, how about we don't link to this garbage:
http://archive.is/U83mM
How long does an anon have to actively use 4chan before they can be deemed an "Oldfag"?
>>28093393
It's not how long, you just have to be pre-2007.
There's no amount of time needed, you just have to have been here since like '06
There's a chart somewhere out there but I don't have it
If you have to ask that question then you aren't one. Shut up and go away.
