Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6432. page
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post your favourite album, robots
I hate the whole cuck anti-white meme that people have made up about this album.
It's genuinely really fucking good.
>>25463606
I wanna say the only ones saying it's anti-white are insecure stormfags.
You whitebois are cool sometimes tho.
TO ALL THE KILLERS AND A HUNDRED DOLLAR BILLERS
Give it to me straight doc, do I have a chance?
Your jawline is sick but you have a nigger nose
cut the sides off of your hair and you'll look like a real fuccboi
>>25463531
> no i'm sorry, son, you have terminal faggotry
No, you are ugly. Never post your picture again, ginger faggot.
>you will never be tickle tortured for hours until you cry and beg for mercy
reeeeeee
why live
Have you asked? It can't happen until you ask.
>>25463409
That's my fetish, except the opposite. I like to tickle people.
I'm assuming you aren't a woman, though.
Good, my dad used to tickle the shit out of me and it was hell, I hated it. I'm aguybtw
NOFAP 2016
DAY 3
who's still doing nofap? who has given up and why?
On my first streak (40 days) I managed to:
>Get the balls to tell this chick I was orbiting how I felt, she didn't return my feelings and I cut off all contact. I think she killed herself recently.
>Hook up with a girl through on online dating site.
>Fix my diet and workout routine, managed to put on 10 lbs of muscle.
>Start showing up to work drunk, got fired and then rehired at an hourly minimum wage position.
>Wreck my dad's truck, and then had to buy it off of him for like two months salary.
>Wreck my motorcycle.
>Lose a gun in a public park, haven't heard anything about that so I think it worked itself out.
>Get multiple speeding tickets.
>Get some more stylish glasses.
>Get really high on coke and email my old high school english teacher that five page report on Animal Farm that was due about seven years ago. I think I reached some interesting conclusions regarding the parallels between the Farm and modern America. I gave him permission to incorporate it in his curriculum for future classes but I haven't heard back yet.
>Finally get around to watching the Twilight series. It wasn't as bad as I was expecting.
>Learn how to windsurf.
Overall it was a productive experience and I look forward to accomplishing even more this year. I'm going for a fifty day streak this time.
Is 2016 the year nofap goes total mainstream?
Yoda, I thank.
Never tried no fap blocks n stuff
>What's your age?
>What's your country?
>Do you have any friends?
>Reason why you're still a virgin
>Reason why you never had a girlfriend
>Do you think you'll get a girlfriend someday?
>Do you think you'll lose your virginity someday?
19
Spain
I have no friends irl, I just have cyber-friends.
I'm so fucking shy, pretty nervous with women.
I`ve low-selfsteem, I think i'm very ugly and I think my body is shit, but i'm not fat.
Yes, maybe someday i'll get a GF who loves me.
The day that I get a GF, I'll lose my virginity, I guess.
>What's your age?
22
>What's your country?
US
>Do you have any friends?
Yes
>Reason why you're still a virgin
Horrid insecurity over my small dick (around 4.7 with pencil tier girth) and being utterly uninteresting, coupled with not being able to entertain a woman or just talk to people in general. I feel like I blow off women who are interested in me without realizing it as well since I'm too scared of boring them.
>Reason why you never had a girlfriend
^^^
>Do you think you'll get a girlfriend someday?
Maybe
>Do you think you'll lose your virginity someday?
Maybe, at this point I just want someone to connect to over getting my dick wet. Having to keep a normalfag facade up is starting to take it's toll on me mentally.
>Tfw 22 years old italian normie
>Decent face fitfag and getting better, big dicked
>I have a gf and affairs from time to time
U jelly bitch?
18
USA
No
I'm ugly, boring, and lack confidence
See above
One can hope
See above
I'm pretty sure if I ever got a girlfriend, I'd scare her away with how much of an emotional car crash I am.
A few years ago when I was still in high school, there was this beautiful girl. I'm not just talking about your typical pretty girl, but a real 9/10 or 10/10 one, you know.. The real rare ones. Not only that but she was really smart and had a genuine heart, that's the best part.
Anyway when I was maybe 15, I wrote a love letter to her, I spent hours working on that, perfecting it. This letter was the best possible piece of writing I could possibly produce. Of course me being an insecure guy, I never gave it to her.
I was so terrified of someone finding this letter on my computer that I encrypted it in binary, and hid it in my google earth folder, the title being the month I wrote it in 'June'.
Every few months or so I would go back and read it, always being surprised about how good it was, and of course being disappointed in myself for having never given her it. Each time I looked at it I edited it, improved it, I've put every ounce of my being into perfecting this letter.
I haven't looked at it in a year now. I'm scared to. A thought recently came to me, maybe you guys might be interested in seeing this thing?
>>25462673
Post the poem OP
>>25462673
go for it muchacho
>>25462673
Let's see It OP
My comment might not be original
Would you date/marry a girl as cute as this if she had a niglet in tow?
>tfw I'm living this right now
feels beta man
>>25462377
No.
Once they go black, there's no coming back.
But honestly, it wouldn't matter what color the kid was. I wouldn't want to raise another man's DNA even if it was white.
I wouldn't even do it if the baby was white.
I will not be responsible for someone else's mistake.
What's it like to play with glorious udders like these?
I've played with small tits before, they were very nice and firm teen tits and wonderfully smooth but they were kind of small.
its amazing
nothing like squeezing, sucking and fucking a huge pair of natural tits
get an escort if you must
big salty bags of milky sand
>>25462526
how old was the owner of these boobs?
>be american
>late bloomer
>my fucked up acne ridden face is finally crystal clear with minor scarring and i'm in good shape
>getting more female attention in my mid 20s than ever
>still can't shake in the back of my head that most of these girls have been through the cock carousel
>i'm pretty much a normie through and through when i'm outside but i still can't get over the fact that most of these chicks hitting on me are just opportunists who had their filling of chad's cock
How do you cope with these feels? Is getting a religious woman who legit believes in no sex before marrying the only way?
>>25462328
Yeh. Or just stop thinking about love and relationships and just fuck around around have fun. It's not like those girls deserve any better.
>>25462328
I had really bad acne and was a general sperg up until I had a Major Breakdown and then I blossomed into a beautiful goose but. Idk. It's hard to feel Attractive when you have no self esteem. I wish I was confident enough in myself to believe that the girls talking to me actually wanted me to talk to them.
>>25462385
>It's hard to feel Attractive when you have no self esteem.
This. I had acne from age 10 to 19, like bad daily acne even though I tried everything except accutane. The result was crippling self esteem issues that left me too emotionally numb to reciprocate anyone's advances for the following 6 years or so.
>brother is alpha as fuck
>has always been a dick to me
>recently started being nice to me and trying to hook me up with his hot friends
>last night he invited me over to play poker with our other brother
>all drinking having good time
>brothers gf comes home and is talking to us
>she starts drinking
>out of no where it seemed she said my beard looks white trash and calls me kid rock and laughs
>I just keep playing and not say anything
>starting to think about leaving because she's just making fun of me and I told my brother I didn't want to come in the first place
>he stands up and slaps the fuck out of her out of no where and calls her a bitch as she walks out of the room crying
>my brother laughs and sits down
>my other brother is shocked just like me
>go back to playing cards
>she comes back in later crying saying she's so sorry to him then me...that she loves him
>he blows her off and tells her to leave
>calls me the next day and says he's sorry about his gf being a cunt
How the fuck can I be this alpha?
>shave your disgusting beard
if women are making fun of you for it then just..
Sounds like a pretty based brother, mate. Ask him.
>>25462311
>has a beard
why would you embarrass your brother like that? fucking scum
Be advised the following story describes how I discovered I had bad phimosis. I mean real fucking bad.
>be 13 years old, 5 years ago
>discover the world of internet pornography
>only jack it to pictures of tits and lesbian stuff because dicks are disgusting and gay
>have never seen a penis other than my own
>even at sex education they only ever showed flaccid ones and very basic diagrams
Presume that my penis is the norm and that everyones is the same. Only the very tip is exposed and the rest is covered by the foreskin, even when erect.
>present day, 18 years old
>start watching more hardcore stuff, which involves penises and stuff
>at first make every effort to avoid looking at the penis in the pornos.
>slowly realise that nearly every penis is different to mine
>their glans or summin are fully exposed.
>decide to do some penis research
>Wikipedia, online medical journals and the like
>Read about phimosis
>Holyshit.wav
>Most men will have their first full foreskin retraction by the time they are 17 years old
>Realise I havent
>Think to myself FUCK MY DICK IS BROKEN
>Read about stretching exercises, and learn a few different techniques
>Start to slowly manage to stretch my foreskin further and further back
>Progress is slow, literally only managing an extra millimetre or two each time
>Find copious amounts of smegma stuck to my dick
>As I dig deeper it only gets worse
>Find what can only be called nuggets of smegma crusted against my dick
I can only imagine that they have been forming for at least the past 5 years. Like stalactites in a cave, except made of smegma. Instead of the normal yellowish creamy substance they had become solid, like a rock, and were deep green in colour.
As of last night I have collected about a pingpong balls worth of volume of smegma nuggets. Its fucking disgusting and degenerate as fuck but at least I fixed my phimosis before it was too late.
Any other penis success stories to share?
>>25461196
>>25461196
>make a ball out of your own five-year-old crusty rotten smegma
>success stories
>>25461237
Didn't actually make a ball of it, but if i were to make a ball of it it would probably be about the size of a pingpong ball.
Holy fucking nigger
Just the thought of this rancid smegma rocks made me gag
good job OP... i guess
Someone create an agar.io server again
bump desu
(You're muted! You cannot post until 01/03/16 10:46:40 17 seconds from now)
>>25460697
Yesterdays was agar.io/?ip185.130.5.229:443
>>25460829
its still working i guess
>tfw I killed my fucking mom by accident
When will the pain stop bros
Tell us how you did it, you stupid fuck
tell us what happened lad
>>25461804
>>25461806
I can't, don't want to risk legal action from my family. They have no idea what actually happened, just assumed she passed out and drowned
Star Wars roll thread
Roll for what kind of character you are in the Star Wars universe. Once you find out, tell us the kind of shit you'd do and what kind of character you'd be.
Double evens - Jedi
Double odds - Sith
0 - 10 - rebel pilot
12 - 21 - imperial pilot
23 - 32 - rebel trooper
34 - 43 - stormtrooper
45 - 54 - bounty hunter
56 - 65 - smuggler
67 - 76 - moisture farmer
78 - 82 - imperial officer
83 - 87 - rebel officer
89 - 98 - politician
Oh, and remember to name your character.
Rollllling
>>25460298
Bils bundee, a corrupt Jew like creature who works in the imperial senate.
unoriginal roll, fuck the robot
> Addicted to shemale porn.
> Fat, but still crossdressing.
> Porn has given me gender issues.
> Jerking off on omegle.
> Chatting wild older guys online.
> Piss porn fetish.
> Dick can't get hard to girls.
> Not even 11/10 girls.
What the fuck has my childhood and porn done to me.
>>25460028
Start liftting.
>>25460041
I've been lifting senpai. Hit 270 bench, 700 leg press etc. At one point I was 275 pounds at 6'3. It didn't change shit;-;
>>25460055
I dunno try cardio maybe?
You hit the gym or homegym?
Might be able to find yourself some normie mentors.
