Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1407. page
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>tfw live in Cleveland
>tfw normies here won't shut the fuck up about the Cav's
Have you tried putting glue on the back of your hand and peeling it off like snakeskin?
Have you tried putting gIue on the back of your hand and peeling it off like snakeskin?
>>29412638
Right? Fuck those normies. Everybody knows that OKC is the official robot team.
have you ever considered making love to your mother?
shes there to help you robots...
I haven't seen her since she was jailed for raping me and my brothers.
>>29412623
No because my mom is ugly and fat.
Although on old pics from her youth she seems thin and alright.
>mfw she probably regrets she had me every single day
>>29412643
Story them?
Should I masturbate today, r9k?
Recently I've slowed down my fapping to once a week. I plan on fapping on Friday but I've got a huge urge to fap right now
What do I do?!!!
Masturbation is a sin anon. God is watching
Take a walk around the block and itll go away xd
>>29412580
Literally JUST bee yourself.
Works every time.
Have you ever attempted suicide before?
If yes, will you try again? Why/why not?
Yes, but never seriously. No, I've fixed myself.
Nobody ever caught me trying.
rad shirt
>>29412565
I climbed out of the window once. Nobody saw me because I was looking in the interior courtyard. But didn't do it and I'm glad I didn't. Now I am a lawyer and I'm doing okay.
how does this make you feel that poeple fuck just because and there is special bound betwen them afterwards?
>>29412522
looks
ownership
and attention surely does make a special bond
its a strange kind of sincerity
feels pretty apethetic man
>>29412522
Idc
Let the normies rack up their STDs
>suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem
Fuck I hate this meme.
Life is the problem. From our perspectives as human beings, that is all we will ever know. It is not temporary.
>>29412515
Then do it, you fucking faggot. What's stopping you?
>>29412515
The statement is generally made by people with a belief in the afterllife. To them, this life is temporary. Of course, the leap of faith they make in their religious conviction is irrational.
This is not to say that suicide is a correct course of action, but the problem is answered by a different philosophical approach.
Have you heard of Absurdism, OP?
>>29412515
They are right though. Life is temporary, it passes. Death is the permanent solution to everything since non-existence is featureless and therefore unproblematic.
They are silly in the sense that they think 'permanent solution' is somehow an argument against suicide.
> be me
> middle aged, poorfaggy bus driver
> live in shit apartment in shit neighborhood
> no wife, no kids
> my only satisfaction in life is drinking, jerking off and shit posting on r9k
> shitposting afternoon
> encounter my favourite meme: "good form pupper"
> I try to post "good form pupper"
> "you have been muted for 2 seconds because your comment was not original"
> wtf?
> discover that the robot is back, my shitposting days are over
> I'm fucking furious
> next day at work I'm driving dangerously fast because of the anger
> passengers keep complaining, don't fucking care
> whilst I'm arguing with a passenger some asshole walks into the road
> hit the brakes but still knock him over pretty hard
> immediately run out to check on him while somebody calls 911
> guy is lying face down, mumbling something
> I get closer and hear "it hurts, it hurts so bad"
> turn the guy on his back
> guy is hiroyuki, that robot re-enabling faggot
> lean in close to his ear and whisper: "you have been muted for eternity because your comment was not original"
> dies
> mfw
Seriously though, what the fuck is the point of the robot. Is it meant to imply that every next conversation you ever have should only contain distinct phrases that you've never used before, because that doesn't make any fucking sense!?
>>29412477
>what the fuck is the point of the robot
This is the question that every member of this board asks themselves, every day of their lives.
I'm just glad that jap is finally dead, two nukes wasn't enough.
>>29412477
It's to stop bots from accessing the board and filling it with copy/paste threads everyday. By being original everytime you post it stops bots from posting since robots can't be original.
>watch anime loud enough so that people on the street can hear it somewhat when they pass by
>am perfectly aware of this but don't give a shit
Just what the FUCK are these normieshits going to do about it? Chances are that most of them don't even know what it is, so as long as it's not hentai I have nothing to worry about.
That reminds me of when my friend found hentai on my computer when I was 13 and then showed it to my grandad.
wow OP you sure showed them
They will think "That dudes TV is pretty loud is he watching cartoons I wonder what language that is it sounds asian" and then you will no longer be in their mind just like the moment prior to hearing you.
There is absolutely no hope for those of us too defective to even disguise ourselves as human.
Having been a client of California Department of Rehabilitation's Blind Field Services of three years, the fact that my caseworker didn't lift a finger to help me get a job beyond e-mailing me links to indeed.com and monster.com and other job search sites, while many of his other clients successfully received employment placement and job retention services, only goes to show that I do not belong here on this Earth.
It's not as if I'm sitting idly by. I have a nice resume for which I've paid a service to polish for me, after filling out an extensive questionnaire. I've followed up on every one of my stupid useless Armo caseworker's shitty-assed fucking e-mails and applied for each and every one of his idiotic job suggestions, whether I had the skills and education for the position or not. Even though I had e-mailed him copies of my resume which clearly outlined my stats and skills and work history, it seemed as if I were merely part of some unpersonalized mass mail. I've been to every job fair and did a meet and greet with everyone to whom I've handed my resume. Applied and took the tests and uploaded my resume online. No feedback on my interviews skills and presenation, nothing to help me secure a steady stream of income. He just sat there with one thumb in his mouth and the other stuck up his ass, not giving two fucks about a short white one-eyed retarded with hearing aids.
The equation is quite simple. If I can't work, I can't afford a place to live. If I can't afford a place to live, that means I don't deserve to live. While others can take their bed, stove, microwave, hot water, clean shower, gaming computers, access to steady Wi-Fi, etc. for granted, I struggle to find a fine line between domestic health and feral survival.
I have 11 days left for my luck to change before I inconvenience the morning commute on the subway with my head-first swan dive.
>>29412404
Why not kill the caseworker instead?
>>29412404
>one-eyed retarded with hearing aids
Aren't you eligible to receive disability welfare?
>>29412404
(Me)
>interview at staples at 9:30
>show up at 9:15
>resume ready, suit on fleek
>no waiting in break room, was escorted to the back from the copy area right away
>manager was a jovial dude who softballed me questions about availability and "most challenging days at your previous jobs"
>asked me to wait and left the office
>another manager came in, even more jovial, threw me more softball questions about computer knowledge, not even A+ Cert level
>dude acted pumped, asked me to wait and left the office
>third dude came in, grinning from ear to ear with teeth showing and arms crossed
>clearly just having a fun
>made small talk, where i was from, did i have reliable transportation, etc
>said he'd get back to me
>thought to myself "wow three dudes, i must've accelerated through the follow-up interview process!"
>on my way out, in the little hallway between the office and the front copier area, some chick was there to escort me back to the front
>heard guys cackling all together in a different room further down the hall HUH HUH HUA HUA HUA HEHEHEHEHEHEH like good ol boys having a good time over a beer
>tfw finding a job is like finding a gf except i'll literally die if i can't find the former
>tfw employers are like women and pick and choose who wins in society and at life
>>29412450
Unfortunately I can walk talk and stand so not disabled enough.
I'm ready for you.
>>29412343
Yep, looks like she's finally ready for a nice guy, pic related.
>>29412343
Don't for for the feminist meme. Let all these post wall sluts suffer the same fate as this 50 year old spinster:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/arlene-schindler-/women-feeling-invisible_b_4151551.html
That's wishful thinking though, the feminist dialogue has become so pervasive that the betas are thoroughly conditioned to accept being the "nice guy finishing last"
That's too bad, good luck finding one, I'm already with my new, ageless, Synth companion
Why can't I have oneitis. I just wanna feel crippled by love. I'm 24 and never had this.Am I gay?
>>29412278
Trust me you don't want that. It likely ends in heartbreak. Fuck heartbreak man... fuck me and my feelings.
Being gay doesn't mean you can't have oneitis, so you're probably straight. You don't want it either way.
>>29412278
Nah, if you were gay gay you would fall in love with some random straight person and you'd know that even if you became ridiculously attractive and had a great personality they would still never be interested in you
>tfw no lightweight gf
There used to be this chick in my high school like 5 years ago, she weighed about 39-44kg, was fucking spooky, tbqh.
>>29412207not even sure but filename matches
>tfw no slaaneshi bf
>Scores of lovesick women drooled over the chiseled 6 feet-1 170 pound bandit
http://www.examiner.com/article/hot-mugshot-guy-jeremy-meeks-unveils-first-modeling-photo-flaunts-ripped-body
Yeah, sure you don't want chad, ladies.
>>29412188
Jesus fucking Christ I honestly hope somebody puts a bullet in this fucker's head.
>73-9
>3-1
>>29412202
For getting lucky with good genetics and getting shitloads of females to fantisize about him?
>"Yeah I'm totally a loner nerd girl"
>"4chan? I don't go on that forum often because there are pedophiles on it but some boards have funny memes"
>"Wow look at all these freaks on /r9k/ they're over 20 and they don't even have a job"
>"You watch cartoons? you are a grown man, what is wrong with you? man up!"
>"You want to kill yourself? but there is so much to live for! suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem!"
>"Ani-may? what's that?"
>"Yeah I go to the gym, I gotta look good for my boyfriend, right?"
>"You play games on a Nintendo GameCube? isn't that an ancient console? Get yourself an xbox one or something."
Literally my conversation with my sister last sunday.
is she atractive?
>>29412216
She's a solid 7 but somewhy her bf is still a 10/10 chad
>Jet black dyed hair with neon shades and shit
>Puts way too much makeup
>Small bra size, I'd say maybe B
I doubt she said all of those things desu
>>29412254
It's called living life on easy mode
Should i kms
do females see me as an inferior beta and do they see me as a waste of time to speak to ?
or is this an average ok height..
You're taller than me by almost 10 centimetres if that makes you feel any better
>>29412310
You must be a girl right
>>29412164
Just so you know, you're 5.67 inches, not 5'67"
