Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1416. page
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ITT: Perfect date ideas?
can be as comfy as you desire
>start off night by me making dinner
>something good but simple
>probably rice with black beans and oregano with a side of Sujuk sausage
>followed by a cuddle sesh watching Seinfeld or something
>then when we decide it gets to late I kiss her on the cheek and she goes home
>I wanna take things slow, really get to know her before getting intimate
>1 dish
>perfect date
you are destined to be a cuck
>>29407870
Just to make things clear this is 100% hypothetical, I don't have a girlfriend I just like imagining comfy situations...
>>29407870
excuse my ignorance, but isn't cuddling intimate?
anohn, remember tuu eate.
>had some refrigerated ramen I forgot to eat
fucking
do cigarettes count as ingesting biomatter intended for organic consumption?
maybe i want to starve
>mfw we arent the bottom of the barrel
>>29407810
B-but, anonI-I go to /mlp/...
>>29407810
>comparing yourself to /mlp/
Dude, thats like bragging about winning the Special Olympics.
MLP and bronies are still a thing?
I thought that was a fad that passed, like gangum style
Is this even fucking English goddamn i hate normiespeak
>>29407804
She is getting inebriated at a party while listening to memerap.
What was so difficult to understand?
>>29407804
>vaping
>probably THC
fucking retarded and disgusting
>>29407804
it's textspeak you dip, gosh it's like you've never had sex before or something
/britfeel/ I don't have the rainy one saved sorry lads edition
>>29407797
The rain in my heart will make up for it
>>29407854
You OK hun? x
Very rainy, very comfy
Wet
ITT: virgins only
no normies allowed
if 20 yo is beyond saving how come i got a gf at 23 yo and am happy fucking her in every possible way?
>>29407786
where is 18? am i still 'getting up there' or am i at the point of no return
Do you think there are any 50+ year old virgins out there? I mean you hear about virgins at 30, but after that it seems even more rare.... And I don't think it's nessecarily that the 30 year old virgins have lost their virgininty...
26 year old KHHV reporting in.
>tfw no robot bf
Give me the source OP, nobody wants your bait and your fake, gay premise, just tell me where I can find more pics of that sloth-faced slut and her incredible knockers.
LONDON
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ORIGINAL
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>>29407785
CHILD BEARING HIPS sauce f4m
How does /r9k/ numb the pain enough to go to sleep? Alcohol isn't working anymore and I'm too much of a recluse to know anything about purchasing drugs.
Tell us about your pain
Lately I've been getting extremely anxious while trying to sleep. Like I don't feel like it's time to sleep but I'm too tired to stay awake
FUCJING sucks man
Bleed yourself for a little while, it helps to be drunk but you don't need to be.
A nail bed on the finger or the inside of your nostril are two unnoticeable exit points.
Bleed out about a fourth of a cup and you'll feel calm, serene, and very sleepy.
>29 years old
>virgin
>a girl likes me
>butter face
>schizophrenic
>~/Nope.jpg
>she insists on me
>a year later
>30
>virgin
>she still insists
>I give up
I don't like her, I feel uncomfortable going around showing me with her, but she really loves me, I don't know what to do, I feel like shit but I know I'll never be able to date a pretty girl, I've lost 30 years trying to date one, I'm a fucking retard..
Schizophrenic girls are great if you're a wizard. Because of their brain they lack a lot of standards typical of normies because they cannot comprehend it. They will not care if you're a virgin so go ahead and fuck her and gain some experience.
You are stupid if you try anything else besides that though.
>hahaha stupid roastie, you probably get asked out everyday but you just don't notice because they're not chads!
>you just need to lower your standards, whore, you'll never know true loneliness like us robots!
>this girl is really into me but she's not Stacy so I guess I'm becoming a wizard LOL so ronery ;___;
Robots should just kill themselves desu
TURN DEM TABLES, op
Do women ever feel intimidated by larger women?
I know for a fact chestlets feel intimidated by women with real breasts. Notice in the public shower how chestlets will fold their arms over their """breasts""" to try and hide their shame
>>29407803
Do you have access to these public showers?
Do you also preside in the Queen's domain of London?
>>29407803
>>29407753
I'm attracted to short girls with smaller breasts, because I don't like the idea of her struggling with massive udders all day. And I think short girls are cute.
>he doesnt wake up alone and crying in the morning
>>29407749
Do you roboto?
>>29407749
>Crying
beta bitch
>>29407959
>He doesnt cry into his pillow to release anger
Can we get a pitbull thread going?
What does he say again?
>>29407768
DALE
-mr worldwide
>>29407768
MISTAH TREE OH FAIVE
>just be yourself
>just put yourself out there
>>29407652
> nobody can judge you but god
> people like the natural you
>c'mon, don't be so shy
>just open up dude
>>29407652
>just smile and say hi
>givem a firm handshake
>when you drop your 2000$ katana on the concrete
>>29407561
is that semen or saliva on her face
>>29407561
if it is $2000 I am sure it will be alright and durable. IF it got damaged from the ~4 foot fall from your computer desk to the basement floor then the katana is confirmed shit
does this fucking retard have the alphabet on his chest?
Dumb shit you used to do when you were little thread
>Be 13
>learn what a .bat file is
>figure out that I can make windows open in an infinite loop
>write file
>send file to my friend over AIM
>tell him it's a movie
>after he reboots his computer, he tells me the movie didn't work
>send it again
>he gets pissed off
>he wants to see the movie
>send new file, tell him it's fixed
>format his hard-drive
>pissed off when he sees me at school
>ask if its because he didn't think the movie was good
>>29407545
>"H-hey Vlad.."
>'George, I am of swearings if you are tellingk me same joek again..'
>"Vlad..knock knock.."
>'Who is of beink there.'
>"WHO? NAH, IT'S HU! AND HE'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF US!!"
>>29407604
hahaha, ya got me
apparently "hahaha" isn't original... who woulda guessed?
>First grade
>at the playground on a weekend with my best friend.
>see girl from our class there
>she brought a lunch box
>sandwich, a big box of nerds, chips and a grapefruit
>she walks away for a bit
>my friend proceeds to stomp on the food, squishing and ruining everything but the nerds
>I take the box and sprinkle it on top of the mess
>girl comes back, face turns red from crying so much
>feel terrible but no parent there to reprimand is
>now she's a drug addict, im to blame
![1466399045992[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/EDnmGOz.jpg "1466399045992[1]")
