Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3948. page
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>Be me, 21 year old university student
>Kissless virgin
>Only one close female friend
>She is blonde, 5'10'' hottie virgin
>Pic related, is her
>She is single, but rejects my advances when we hang out
>Autisitc and awkward like myself
>Total fembot, unaware of her own hotness
>One day tells me she has been watching "mixed wrestling" videos online
>Wants to try out submission wrestling with me
>Fuck yeah, physical contact!
>We start wrestling. She in yoga pants and sports bra. Me in running shorts.
>I initially go easy on her.
>She gets mad, tells me to go all out
>All right, let's see where this goes
>We wrestle for 10 minutes, I am up 5 submissions to 0
>Friend says she will use "secret weapon" to win next fall
>Suddenly removes her sports bra
>Perky, 36Cs with small, pink nipples
>I am transfixed by friend's 10/10 tits
>Forget match is still happening
>Sudden sharp pain in my groin
>While I was distracted by mammaries, friend had backhand slapped my nut sack
>Crumple to knees with moderate pain and nausea
>Friend locks in strong headscissors
>I quickly tap out on her milky white thigh
>Friend puts sports bra back on
>We wrestle for another 10 minutes
>Nothing as exciting happens for rest of match
>I win with score of 9-3 submissions
>Friend thanks me for match
>Eyefucking the shut out of me
>Wants another one this Friday
>Promises she will "devise more tricks to win our next match"
>I readily agree
No sex yet, but I saw my first boobs and had extensive physical contact with a hot girl. I can't wait to see what "tricks" my friend has in store. I'll update you robots with the results of our match. I think sex may be imminent.
>yoga pants
>milky white thigh
Pick one buddy
what the fuck is this :D
>>27953108
Yoga pants with slits on the side.
ITT draw your relationship woes in ms paint
>cant draw
hows this
>>27952870
You're a cutie pls draw yourself naked.
At least you don't have a roast beef pussy
nevermind
Which is the worst type? And why is it INTJ?
I took a test a while ago and I got ENFP
Didn't know it meant I was popular though
>tfw intp-t
Who else?
>>27948134
INTJ here, can confirm its bad
Well r9k, i have three weeks left with my crush, 6 classes total.
This is my first serious crush and i dont know what to do. She is extremely quiet and im pretty sure she was looking at me a lot across the room for the first couple months before she had her seat taken and now sits in a seat that is blocked off by people most of the time. I have no idea how to talk to her and im running out of time. If i dont talk to her and get her number/a date in these three weeks i fear i may never see her again. What the fuck do i do? I have never had a gf, approached a girl, had a female friend or even a oneitis.
I cant approach her in class and sit next to her randomly, cause she sits on the other side of the room and id probably be taking someones seat. At this point in the year changing seats would be awkward, especially when its obviously just to be next to a girl. Timing walking out of the room is difficult too, plus she goes in a different direction once we leave. The only possibility is waiting outside the room before class starts which she did once or twice early on but i havent seen her show up early since. So unless she happens to show up at the exact same time as me i dont know how i will ever be able to start a conversation with her. Even if i get the chance and somehow manage to gain the confidence to say anything to her, i still have no fucking idea what i would say or how i could keep the conversation going enough to take the next step.
It sucks man but you have two options
1. Say fuck it and just talk to her. Ask her for her number
2. Accept that you might never see her again and you'll find other girls. Plus you still might see her around campus
>>27961426
I want to stick my pee pee in that booty hole :3
>>27961426
hey man
i used to be like you in 7th grade
i loved this girl with all my heart
but i never had the balls to talk to her
but i became better
and learned from mistakes
i only visit here to help out my cyborgs and reminisce
here is my plan
how attractive are you out of ten?
also how confident are you?
if you are 6.5 or above and are willing to go thru with this here goes
near the end of class go near her side of the room
>class ends
try and catch up to her
you know her name right?
and she knows urs right?
say hey ""qt"""
if u dont know her name ask
"i was thinking and I would like ur number"
say it like a command but not an actual command
plans never work honestly
but its good to have an outline of what to do
act natural and dont go autstic
not thirsty tho
think like chad
if u get her # then congrats
but only using texting for logistics
if u dont get her # then that fucking sucks mate but who cares if u wont see her in 3 weeks
trust me
its not the rejection that hurts, its the regret of not doing it
gl anon
fuck what do I say, it's my pops
>>27961107
>"Absolutely nothing" is part of the anything I want you dumb old faggot
>are you jealous wagecuck
>>27961107
"A wage cuck like you would not understand "
You guys wear clothes right, I could do with dressing better, What are some good casual ways to dress, Not smart casual.
>>27960801
wear a casual polo instead of just a t-shirt.
the jeans are a good fit but they are too long, get shorter ones. rolling them up looks silly and tacky.
get new shoes, those look like women's dress shoes. just get nice steel toed boots, you can wear those with anything.
>>27960801
guy looks like a massive tool
>>27960846
that isnt op
What would you buy for $250 or less that would make you happy?
>>27959784
maybe an ounce of weed if i could jew him down from 280
Would buy the things in the photo
<<<<<<<
So I can break into shit and steal more shit to sell for money to buy shit!
>>27959784
medicine for my dog
Probably won't reach 100 posts before comfy bed time edition.
The IRA did literally nothing wrong.
think I've royally fucked my dissertation lads
>>27959545
I NEVR KILLED ANY MAUN
When will this political correctness insanity end? Will it ever? I swear, it's like I've woken up one morning to find that right is wrong and wrong is right, and most people don't see a problem with this whatsoever. Is this just going to continue until the world is in ashes?
>>27959503
how do you see the world in the year 3016?
>>27959596
i don't the world at all in 3016
>>27959628
*don't see, fuck
just post all your pics of pepe
>>27959279
This thread isnow a smojak thread frienderino
I thought everyone hated Pepe.
These first two were inspired by an Australian shitposter who told tales of fiendishly ruining his coworker's life.
>>27959279
poopoo pepe is so devious
>find 10/10 girl on Tinder
>she's Christian
Can anyone explain why it always tries matching me up with these girls?
>>27958708
>not wanting to date christian girls
are you a dirty fucking muhammad or something?
>>27958708
>implying that wouldn't make her 11/10 waifu material
maybe you should try giving your life to christ
>>27958754
>>27958755
Sorry. I prefer a woman who doesn't dictate her life based off of a fuzzy feeling in her chest.
Let's see what the majority of r9k's personality is.
>www.16personalities.com
Infp ._. Nyahhh...
ISTJ
INTJ is a meme personality btw
>>27957688
that makes sense for me as i am a meme person
Do you believe she is correct?
>women want
Stopped reading there.
i believe i'm in love
says the 4/10 ugly eyebrows girl.
Sure.
>19 years old
>Have never fapped to vaginal sex before in my entire life
I'm not gay, I like breasts and butts but vaginas don't look arousing. At best they're just there and at worst they're horrible roast beef sandwiches, usually looking like an axe wound. Not to mention they bleed on a monthly basis. Buttholes are so much more aesthetic and erotic to me.
Anyone else know this feel?
>>27956929
Buttholes are nice OP, but how can you not like pussy? They are so pretty.
>>27956929
>bleed monthly
Yeah and an asshole poops nearly daily. Poop is lethal and dirty.
i know this feel
i only fap to feet, deepthroat and other things
vaginas are so ugly desu dont care about buttholes though
Please fill out the form:
Where?
When?
How?
Why?
>>27956925
There's a train track nearby. I've been thibking about it. I have a plan.the train goes by at 5 am. I would walk there in the middle of the night, take a bunch of sleeping pills, and lay my head on the tracks. By the time the train got there, I'd be in profound sleep. Wouldn't feel a thing. It would be perfect. I wouldn't have the guts to directly put myself in the situation.
something tall
i dont know
jump
Where?
My car
>When?
Probably next spring
>How?
Carbon monoxide poisoning
>Why?
Shit life
