Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2531. page
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>turning 26 soon
>feel like i'm getting heavier and saggier
>less attention from men
>still have more than 50 years to live
At least you guys have a shot. I'm slowly getting more and more invisible.
our qa manager is like 40 and she still looks hot. you're just a lazy fag :)
Bitch, be thankful you don't have to deal with balding.
you had 10 or so years where you could easily snag and keep a good guy, but you either failed or didn't even try. hell, even in your current "saggy" state, it's 9000x easier for you to get a date than 90% of the males on this board. fuck off
It's my birthday anons what about you
not until the end of the year
happy birthday tho, what are you doing for your bday?
>>28781828
Happy birthday anon
What'd you do today?
>>28781828
Happy birthday anon, mine is in July. I hope you have a day that only tiny grass could dream of having.
What does cock taste like, fembots?
>>28781725
It tastes like dick
Like salty skin. It's gross, woman just take it instinctively, ignoring taste.
>>28781725
At best: suck on your thumb.
At worst: suck on your thumb after rubbing the sweat of your armpit on it.
So which board is 4chan's biggest dumbest cancer and why is it /pol/?
there is nothing wrong with opinions different than yours.
Sounds like you were BTFO on another board and we're just assflustered enough that you decided to complain on /r9k/.
Just take a deep breath and calm down.
pol are the biggest neckbeards on the entire internet. a true disgrace.
Do you hate your parents for not using a condom?
they wanted to have me and it wasn't their fault that I turned into a piece of shit
>>28781682
Yes it was, you inherited their shitty genetics.
>>28781682
>it wasn't their fault that I turned into a piece of shit
do you honestly believe this?
you inherited THEIR genes
you were raised by THEM
you were turned into the person you are today because of THEIR actions
it was their mistakes that made you the piece of shit you presumably are today. we need to rise up and make our parents understand that it is them who are the massive failures, not us
Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/04/18/richard-quest-cnn-reporte_n_97466.html
>>28781597
cnn isn't even fucking news at this point. it's a gossip rag desu that has homosexuals (sally cohen for example) and communists (van jones) on it to pander leftist bullshit agenda
>>28781597
Man this happened in 2008, this is the oldest of the old when it comes to news. The sex toy was in the boot of his car, anyways. Not that it makes it any more okay.
Honestly, for Americans CNN is probably the best news source. MSNBC is liberal filth and Fox only has a select few programs of any worth.
>>28781597
Link something more reliable than Huffpost, or at least use an archive, I don't want those faggots getting my clicks
>you like her
>she seems to like you and approach you for chat and smile a lot
>you think about her amd daydream
>after a few days
>blah blah blah my boyfriend blah
>tfw
once again i thought her friendly approach meant that she wanted it.
>daydreams crushed with no survivors
>feel like there no point to get to know her more
what a bitter fuck have i become..
Yeah that's my worst problem too. It's not a lack of confidence or reciprocation, I'm just too optimistic. Doesn't matter what. Everything ends up being disappointing unless it's perfect.
>>28781636
my addiction to escapism has a few really bad downsides.. this dive to daydreaming the moment something positive happens..
As soon as they say "my boyfriend" I just get up and leave. You should do the same. Fuck em.
/r9k/ I am a 24 year old guy who has masturbated for the first time in my life over the past few days (have done it 3 times). Nothing at all, at all, felt "amazing" about this like I was led to believe.
I put some lotion in my hand and just rubbed my frenulum until I came (actually stroking my whole shaft is not working, don't even use porn). This wasn't some out of body experience that will "take over my life" like a lot of people say, especially with this whole "no Fap" thing that's popular online. I don't really feel any more or less horny than I did before it, where I've been told that "once you cum, you will look in disgust at yourself and feel completely relaxed and all that" and I felt none of that. I didn't even have some moaning, groaning, gasping orgasm either, i just kind of...cum
Is there something wrong with me? What exactly am I supposed to feel after it?
>>28781581
>What exactly am I supposed to feel after it?
Nothing. Masturbating sucks, but it beats not masturbating so I still do it.
>24 year old guy who has masturbated for the first time
die, you pathetic mastubationless-virgin.
>>28781581
Yes, there is something wrong with you if you don't feel orgasms.
>having friends
I seriously hope you guys don't do this.
Other people are boring scum.
Focus on escapism.
>>28781552
>Other people are boring scum.
>Focus on escapism.
if that's what you believed, you'd be consuming, collecting, or creating something, not here, talking to someone
not me
I haven't had friends pretty much ever, although I did have acquaintances in high school i guess
honestly i just don't see the pointwhy the fuck am i lying i hate it when people look down on me and pity me for having no friends... but honestly that's the worst part about not having friends. if it was socially acceptable to be fine being alone i think more people would choose that
>>28781666
I don't come here much anymore famalam.
I drunkenly hooked up with a girl who's in unrequited love with me.
>have known her for two years, knew about her feelings for at least a year and a half
>was very clear I did not feel the same, but I was still flirty and did kiss her once a long time ago
>care about her a lot but just am not emotionally attracted to her
>don't want to lose her as a friend but I don't know what the hell the best course of action is
>still making out with her even after we sobered up
She's studying abroad here for a year and going back to Japan in a few weeks. I won't see her until at least spring of 2017. Help me, /r9k/. You guys are expert on women.
STEP 1: FUCK
STEP 2: INSEMINATE
STEP 3: SHIP TO JAPAN
STEP 4: INCREASE JAPANS BIRTH RATE INDIRECTLY
STEP 5: A WINNAR IS YUO
>>28781551
> hooked up with a girl
> Help me, /r9k/. You guys are expert on women.
>>/fuckoffbacktolereddit/
>>28781846
I was being facetious.
Mootblox
What are you doing tonight robots?
It's so lonely at this hour.
I'm trying to avoid my stalker. I'm afraid he's out there, trying to find me.
>>28781541
Crying in my bed while watching hentai
Started playing overwatch only to lose 8 games in a row. Now I'm just shitposting because I suck.
Who's hotter, the brunette or the blonde?
Neither, but I do want to beat both of their faces in. Fucking cunts.
>>28781425
Beauty comes from within OP
I guess the blonde has bigger tits but there's not too much to distinguish them from each other. They're both conventionally attractive and I'd probably feel awkward talking to either of them
Why aren't you enjoying the awesome tasting little Caesars pizza?
>>28781411
I enjoy being thin?
Domino's tastes better.
Because I work there and make that disgusting shit.
Let's all be honest with each other, how many of you own a fedora? And how many of you actually wear it? Also how many of you deep down want to wear a fedora but don't because of the social stigma's attached to it?
I'm the latter case, I really want to wear my fedora but I also don't want to be judged and grouped in with bronies and autistic people. I mean, fuck, I really fucking like the way my fedora looks, it actually gives me some self confidence and self esteem even though I'm aware of all the social stigma's and stereotypes associated with it.
I guess I could just wear it and not give a fuck what anyone says but I know people are going to judge me for it, even completely strangers will look at me and instantly assume things about me because I'm wearing a fedora, it sucks.
>>28781347
I owned a fedora in the 6th grade, because that's the last time I thought they were cool.
I've never been one much for hats.
>>28781347
i would suck his dick no homo he pulls that off really well.
>>28781644
I'm 23 and I still think they look nice, well that's just my personal opinion. I don't like the social stigma and negative stereotypes associated with it, it's the reason I stopped wearing it.
You're all pussies
Nuh uh you are
Why don't you eat my pussy?
my baby ruth bar had some ants on it and i didn't give a fuck who are you calling a pussy?
![lsImxKK[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/URaeZz2.jpg "lsImxKK[1]")
![shutterstock_270392324[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/TzlYQfn.jpg "shutterstock 270392324[1]")
