Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2527. page
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Robots, what is love? Is it when you realize you can't spend a day without a specific person involved in your life? Is it when you see or interact with a specific person, your heart ALWAYS skips a beat? I just got in a relationship with this one girl
>inb4 get out of my board normie REEEE
(Ive been coming here for 4 years. )
and we both just absolutely adore each other. What is the average time a normie waits to say "I love you"? I've heard 3 months is good, but a normie I work with has said it about 3 weeks in. This girl is amazing, but when is a good time to drop the L word?
>>28784087
>Robots, what is love?
It's when concern of their future keeps you from killing yourself.
>>28784087
>What is love ?
A song by Haddaway.
>>28784128
Seems like a fair point, but wouldnt you argue that there's more to it than that? For example, how involved you are in their future?
Making friends from /r9k/ is fucking pointless.
So many of you pretend you're so fucking alone and pathetic when in reality so many of you are Chads and have perfectly normie social lives while the rest of us are in psychiatric pain that we can't even achieve that.
What the fuck is the point. None of us will ever meet because so many of the summer fags that have come in here are fucking fake and stink up this board when the rest of us come here for comfort and to spew our feelsy and angry venom.
I fucking HATE NORMIES.
>>28784082
you're a big guy.
for you :)
unless you have a funnier greentext than that mopy bullshit, why don't you just leave?
pls be my frie dnd
I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me.
first, you need to find an isolated area so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread.
My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit.
Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet.
You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird.
This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences.
I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven't done it in years but still catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, cock throbbing and waiting for them to land close by me.
Who else /armpit hair/ fetish here?
I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me.
first, you need to find an isolated area so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread.
My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit.
Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet.
You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird.
This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences.
I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven't done it in years but still catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, dick throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.
>>28784020
I have a fetish for girls with somewhat strong jaws.
>>28784020
armpit hair is pretty damn hot
>thinking it's a fetish
how is it a fetish?
who /uni-brow/ here?
I got teased so much because of it as a kid, and even now I still get teased for it occasionally, not exactly in an insulting bad way, but still in an unpleasant way. I don't see uni-brows as a bad thing. I don't mind if other people have it. Is it really that bad to look at?
>inb4 curry curry poo in loo
Pic is not me, but my natural skin color is white as pic related, and I'm of European ancestry as far as I know.
So, how do you guys deal with your unibrows?
Do you keep them or pluck them out or shave them or what?
>>28784005
just pluck it you ugly nigger
t.ugly nigger
>>28784127
isn't it just girls that pluck eyebrows due to their insecurity?
are guys with eyebrows a normal thing though?
>>28784412
It's just like shaving. Getting rid of unwanted hair in the face area.
Hey robots It's my birthday today. what should i do?
>>28784001
Kiss your gf
>>28784001
upstage elliot rodger and become the new king of /r9k/
>>28784001
That pic is Cake McMurray.
What's it called when you're only attracted to brown girls? Like yellow fever but brown? Pic unrelated
you have a serious case of the shits
>>28783987
A traitor
JungIe fever
You use your computer 18 hours a day.
Post your desktop, robots.
>>28783969
>You use your computer 18 hours a day.
>Anime
>>>/jp/
EVERYBODY LOVES THE SUNSHINE
>>28783969
Simon Stalenhag's work
tfw you have stretch marks
I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I am particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me.
first, you need to find an isolated area so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread.
My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit.
Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet.
You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird.
This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences.
I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven't done it in years but still catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, cock throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.
>>28783950
Does it matter though?
Not like anybody's gonna see you naked/shirtless
>>28783972
nice pasta m89, saved
I really don't like anyone that frequents this board on a regular basis. You're trash, human filth lower than the dirt on the bottom of my boot. I'm not your friend, I'm not your "bro". I'm not your family. If I had my way, you'd all be dead or in camps.
>>28783859
Got a source on that gif?
>>28783859
Lol pretty gross gif bro gotta be honest with u senpai
>>28783859
I just fapped and now I wanna fap again, come on OP
I'm 5'8, living in the US.
I've spent so long being insecure about my height, but just recently, I actually went outside for a long while and focused on people around me, noticing just how many of them are just as short as me, if not far shorter. A rather small amount were actually a significant amount taller.
Nobody looked at me funny or made fun of me like I'm always fearing and expecting.
It's almost like 5'8 actually is average height, huh.
WHY DO YOU GUYS LIE TO ME.
>>28783822
Go to an area with above poverty line incomes and your generalization will be invalidated.
>>28783856
I'm already in it though.
The answer? You only thought that was short.
Thanks Auntie
>>28783798
THANKS AUNTIE
originio
>>28783798
THANKS AUNTIE
F CY GUY FCYVUVUVUC
>>28783798
ARIGATOU AUNTIE-SAN
What's the scariest thing that's happened to /r9/?
>be me
>home alone
>hear noise
>follow it downstairs
>leads me to bathroom
>look in mirror
>see faggot
spOoky
Me and a friend had to literally walk across half of Albuquerque at midnight because we stayed out too late and couldn't get in touch with our degenerate parents. it was 4am when I got home that night.
>Fell through the ice of a frozen river before I knew how to swim
>jumped out of a plane at 18,000 feet
>paranoid drug person held an electric drill to my head
>knife wound to the chest that needed 17 stitches to close
Yet after all this what I still fear most is rejection. Weird, huh?
Any robots start to actually turn their lives around? Stories?
>>28783766
Yeah, actually. I'll post tomorrow because I'm exhaustarino
>>28783766
I start changing my life every year but fuck up halfway through
>>28783766
I wouldn't consider my life as truly taking a turn until I go atleast a month without coming back to the robot
>What's the matter, Anon-kun, didn't you want to lose your virginity? :)
>>28783685
Fuck that, im saving myself to marriage.
I bet it smells like heaven.
It looks like a trannies 5 second post op
Old socially retarded NEET here. is 27 too late to see a doc about getting some anti anxiety and dpression meds
It's never too late to seek professional help, anon. Go for it if you think it will make you a happier person. I hope you will feel better soon!
No, absolutely not! Please see a doctor.
only helps if you have Chads looks
