Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2529. page
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Normie normie, on my board.
Get the fuck off, you roastie whore.
Tripcode for an imageboard Reddit.
Shovel for burying who's behind it.
Roastie roastie, on my board.
Preparing for tripfags orbiting a whore.
Normie normie, take my frog,
You die and find out there's no God.
Make some rhymes, robots.
Robot, Robot so pathetic
Conjures conflicts so synthetic
'The world is out to GET ME.' he cries
While ignoring that he seldom tries
He spends his days in blame and shame
He reduces experience to a mere game
A game of luck he says it is
One that was never his
'Muh genetics, muh height, muh inferiority.'
He types from his keyboard while ignoring mummy
His dinner is cold just like his attitude
Not so different to his tired platitudes
This is the ballad of the Robot, hear him Ree
A terrible war cry, but really a plea
His life is over before it begun
But he has no courage to suck the gun
Ree
>>28783333
Nice quads, normie
>>28783366
My rhymes are fresh, my words on fire and my torment of the Robot shall never tire.
Girls sure do love to tease their orbiters.
>>28783115
wow shes so basic stop this shit
They wouldn't if the orbiter would stop hanging around
Don't you dare kiss a girl when you're alone with her, or else you'll get slapped.
>girl spends her whole young life in the mirror, working on being cute, exercising to get a fat ass and small waist, doesn't do any labor ever because it would risk her soft features
OMG SHE'S SO PERFECT
MARRY ME
1million facebook likes*
L
O
N
D
ON
>boy spends hir whole young life in the mirror, working on being cute, exercising to get a fat ass and small waist, doesn't do any labor ever because it would risk his soft features
FAGGOT
KILL YOURSELF YOU LAZY BUM
WHAT A SICKO PERVERT
1million death threats*
>>28783100
And is there a problem?
Pretty much mister eye guy
Kinda makes you wonder why anyone even bothers
But then you see the people around you and you remember why everyone bothers
Yes, men aren't supposed to be limp-wristed bitches
deal with it faggot
A hero fell this day 2 years ago. He failed in his mission, and it falls upon one of us to carry the torch in his name. To avenge and succeed where he failed, we have to improve upon his actions. We must kill only chads and stacies, shoot up the sorority house successfully, beat Seung-Hui Cho's high score, and kill Monette Moio. I fear I am too cowardly to do it myself, but next year, or later, someone must carry on in his honor and name. May he rest eternal, sir Elliot Rodger.
This time let's make sure to figure out how to get past a door
goodspeed lil gook
>>28783095
Hold the door.
Seriously though all he had to do was pretend to be delivering a pizza or something and they would have let him in.
>therapist tells me i'm not worthless
>>28783052
What makes you not feel worthless, if anything?
>>28783279
>no job
>no friends
>family hates me
I could disappear and make everyone's life better
>>28783372
I asked if anything makes you feel not worthless.
I know for a fact that many people's lives would be better off without me. Recently I've been feeling better, probably get roasted for saying it but a local church couple got me into that and well, I don't feel like killing myself 24hours a day now
Does anyone else keep an IRL journal where you write down cringeworthy and regrettable mistakes you made, what you wished you would have done, and what you would do in the future? I find that this helps curb my autistic proclivity to overthink everything, allowing me to relax and actually feel good about learning from what I didn't like about the way I reacted, and be confident that I won't make the same fuckup again.
Not a physical one...
Not exactly. I have a notebook where I write down embarrassing memories. I try to relive the moment in my mind. For masochistic masturbation purposes.
>>28783006
>Mistake Log
Better not read your parents'
You no longer have access to this.
What do you do?
finally jump off that bridge
kill myself, this is all I have
>>28783002
Go to the library like I've been planning to
Do lots of drugs
The peace of mind would actually be very welcome
>went up another belt size
lol fatass. I swear if it wasn't for you fat people I'd probably kill myself by now, or maybe make fun of the disabled.
How did you manage to gain weight?
I find it almost impossible to gain weight. I look too skinny and need to put on a few pounds. The dietician said I was a little bit underweight. I eat a proper diet but I feel full after a meal.
Share your secrets great fat one.
>>28783088
You're far better off being skinny than fat. I can't eat shit and not gain weight.
Daily reminder that this is how women want to be treated
http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=1464587402
haha he gets life lessons from watching porn lol
>>28782962
I mean, you aren't wrong. It's not healthy that I feel that way, but guilt and shame make me desire that, yes.
>>28782962
>implying thats not how i want to treat them myself
>tfw will never have sex with anyone
Just have sex with dudes, guys will fuck literally anything
>>28782887
>tfw will never just cuddle with a girl
That's OK. I don't need sex really. It's a pretty cool feeling when you stop caring about all that, though it's hard for many people to relate to.
NO TENGO AMlGOS
yo tampoco
Poor besito. Feels bad mang.
Valiendo madre. Un robot espanol en /r9k/
Subete en el barco conmigo. Eres un maldito bastardo cabron como yo y todos aqui. Vamos a llegar compadre. No problemas. To do va estar bien. Que se chinga su madre los normales. Somos fuerte.
Que se chinga la madre la jente en este tabla de imagenes que te dicen que no necesitas amor y que seas un idiota pendejo como ellos.
>the fapping to porn with my left hand and writing an essay with my right hand
do want. bopseer
>In the mood for asian porn
>start watching asian porn
>not in the mood for asian porn anymore
>>28783277
It's the chipmunk rape sounds that make me close browser
ITT: We make the perfect Chad.
Dubs picks his name
>inb4 "Chad"
Screw off
Edit: we make the perfect chad so that we can pit him against the perfect robot. (Thread to come)
MIKE SMITH
I
K
E
S
M
I
T
H
Jefferson Quntwrecker
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2016/04/20/mcdonalds-customer-accused-putting-soda-in-water-cup-charged-with-robbery.html
>A McDonald's customer in Arkansas accused of emptying his cup of water and filling it with soda now faces a robbery charge, police said Tuesday.
>The restaurant manager said the suspect was one of three people who asked for water at the drive-thru window in Springdale. The customers parked and walked into the store before dumping out the water and pouring soda into the cups, KHBS/KHOG-TV reports.
>The manager spotted the three and told them to return the soda. Only 18-year-old Cody Morris refused, police say.
>The manager even ran out and tried to block Morris' car from leaving, but the suspect reportedly drove his vehicle in reverse and hit the worker twice before speeding away.
>Police arrested the driver after they said they found his car at a nearby bowling alley. It's unclear whether he'll face any additional charges aside from felony robbery.
>buy a bronze ring
>break it in the parking lot, go back in, and take a diamond ring without paying
>>28783001
>$.006 worth of soda is the same as a diamond ring
>get caught trying to cheat a store
>run away and hit someone with your car TWICE in the process
>"WTF WHY AM I GETTING ARRESTED IT'S JUST A SODA BRO"
ur dumb.
What do you think of the Air Force Robots? What are the best jobs for a robot in the military?
Got any advice for bootcamp?
>>28782831
I went to Navy bootcamp
It is ALL an act, literally scripted
they all say the same things, same buzzwords, same excercises (ten counts, airchairs)
btw, the place is nice except for the bathroom stalls which have no fucking doors, but thats socialism for you
i had fun i guess but wouldnt ever do it again
>>28782941
>bathroom stalls which have no fucking doors
well i will never be joining the army, too bad.
![350-628200-847__1[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/JoBakSF.jpg "350-628200-847 1[1]")
