Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5563. page
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>virgin
>Finally get gf
>She invites herself to my place
We're probably going to fuck but
>Disgusted by vaginas
>Masturbate almost exclusively to traps, can't cum if it doesn't have a penis and balls
>If looking at futanari and it has a vagina, I can't fap to it
Will I even be able to cum?
Probably not. I couldn't cum the first time I had sex and I'm not into traps. At least she came I guess
>>26223328
>homosexual
>gets a gf
>>26223328
>has a girlfriend
>never had sex with her
either go back to school or back to 1950
>Want to commit suicide
>Every method either doesn't work anymore, is quite painful, or may leave one crippled rather than dead
Why isn't there an easier way to do this?Is asphyxiation painless at least?
The best way to kill yourself is like that movie. The Big Blue.
I don't know OP, jumping from a dock with a big rock tied up seems quite effective.
>>26223186
If you do it right. If you don't you'll just pass out, meaning you can try again.
I have nothing to live for and I don't want to live. What is the best way to go out in a blaze of glory?
Kill Ted Cruz
>>26223151
define "blaze of glory"
Become a policeman. Get involved with really tough areas. Remember to say you want to have your organs donated.
Night shift anybody?
What do you do, and what do you do during your shift to occupy the time?
>>26223001
well if your still there i usually just work,play on my phone on break in my car. Its nice at night, kind of peaceful you know but other than that there's not much to do.
Usps job
>tfw just getting off at 6am
>>26223447
What's your job if you don't mind me asking.
How badly could the mods/janitors ruin your life?
if every 4chan post I made was made public, things wouldn't get worse because I'm the same autist all the time
>>26222773
Even if they called your parents or oneitis or something?
Oh man, that pic reminds of how much I used to be into fingerboxing. I should pull out my old rig and give it a spin.
My disant twitch wife i watch on a daily basis was being mean to me today
Iv been watching her for atleast 2 years and shes been really kind to me, extra kind so kind that i always felt comfy when i had bad day i watch her an feel good
She was being mean today idk this first time she did this and idk if she even knew it
Grrrrr fml man im going to end it if she isn't going to be nice tomorrow
>>26222749
How much money have you spent on this woman who streams for you and thousands of other retards?
>>26222778
Probably over ten thousand in two years, family.
>>26222782
Why?
Also post stream.
I wish I believed in an afterlife so I would have no problem killing myself.
What if you were reborn in much worse conditions than this current life?
>>26222570
What could be worse than being a low-level human? Serious question. Imagine being an abused puppy with no understanding of "why". Isn't that better than knowing exactly why?
What if the afterlife is shittier than your current life?
ITT: Worst lifetime injury
Here's mine.
>5th grade after school
>hanging with my 2 best friends Tall black one, and weird mexijew one
>Dick and Cunt respectively
>Cunt has the great idea of pretend wrestling, since that was relevant
>Dick calls him self X-Dick, cunt is Powerman
>They run at me so I drop my backpack and X-dick picks me up and slams me
>Powerman charges and then tackles X-dick to the ground and the mass falls on top of me
>Ow fuck
>They start thrashing like a beached swordfish
>They run off, and I'm struggling to get up
>Walk off to the afterschool area and then play soccer in pain for 30 minutes
>Come back to school a month later, surgery, sling, scars and all
>X-Dick doesn't say sorry
>Powerman avoids talking about it
Shattered my collarbone, 4 fractures.
What're your stories /r9k/?
>>26222546
>on some trip with a youth group
>play volleyball on the beach with some other kids
>pretty close to the water
>ball comes at me
>I got this bitch
>jump backwards and slam the fuck out of this ball
>land again and notice that I am in water
>landed with the feet on rough terrain full of stones
>big toe feels weird
>pull leg up
>sliced quarter of my nail off and bleed pretty hard
>ignore it and play on in the sand
>come back to camp
>toe hurts really fucking bad
>gonna heal up by tommorow
>it doesnt
>whole toe is swollen as fuck
>stinks like rotten meat already
>being the retard I am I do not ask for desinfectants
>just pull out my deodorant and spray it straight into the wound
>the fucking pain haunts me to this day
>wash out my foot
>finally get a dandage and disinfectants
>nurse it up as well as I can
>limp through the rest of the trip
Had to get a surgery afterwards (twice) because the infection spread so far. Still have my toe though.
>>26222546
I had a seizure cleaning up a cut down tree and fell on a pitchfork. It stuck me in the chin and somehow broke my jaw in three places. Week+ in the hospital and a couple months jaw wired shut. Had to take the wires out myself.
>>26222546
Got into a fight.
Someone threw a brick onto my fucking head.
Hit me on the forehead an inch above my eye.
3 stitches. Didn't even pass out.
I was pretty lucky. I could have easily lost a few teeth or my nose, go blind or even die.
>you know those super shy people that don't talk to anybody? i fucking hate that
overheard on the tram back home from uni a few minutes ago, said by a fucking roastie of course
why are those cunts so mean to people who literally did nothing to them? is it because they're so desperate for attention that they hate anybody who doesn't play their fucked up little game?
They have to rationalize. Every normie is playing the game and only through playing it can they stay positive. Only through their delusion can they work hard despite getting shat on and pretty much be a productive member of society(which is not really a good thing).
If they see someone who isn't playing the game, it scares and threatens them.
They do not know someone might be listening to them. They probably thought it was a private conversation. So that doesn't mean they are mean without meaning. They are unaware.
But the real question would be why does she/they think that. I think there are different reasons but one reason might be because she was in love with one of those guys that never payed attention to her so she never got him as boyfriend so now she hates that kind of behavior. Another reason might be because shy people can get used to other people with time. Like for example they can talk to a friend of all their life easily but when it's a new person it's hard and awkward. So the person that tries to meet this shy person thinks the shy person is just being mean to her so they think they are mean and of course they are not aware of the fact that they are actually very shy.
I don't think I explained myself very well. I think I need to practice writing essays/
![Rare eyed coloured pepe [TRAP CARD].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/6PAv8KD.jpg "Rare eyed coloured pepe [TRAP CARD]")
trap card activated
Which hunie would you pop?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giRyOmjHzw0
>>26222246
The porn star tbqh
Beli.
Audrey > Beli > Kyu > Nikki > Garbage
/r9k/, help me get my innocence back.
I'm not really misogynistic, I don't hate women, but agree with a lot of shit /r9k/ says. I just see it as normal and as a result of both parties, women aren't to blame only.
But that's not the point. After 'beating' depression my emotions have become inert. I'm a hhkv in his 20's but can't seem to like any girl emotionally despite having options at the moment where they have admitted to liking me. I feel bad for them because they're nice but I just can't share the sentiment back after years of misery, rejection and cruelty in some cases by women. I just don't care, but I want to so badly. I want that warm and fuzzy feeling inside when someone likes me or I like them. i want to fall in love again and have a crush. I want to have any form of FUCKING FEELINGS TOWARDS PEOPLE PLEASE HALP.
Please.
I just want to feel again.
I don't know what to tell OP, maybe you should just listen to some nostalgic music and go see a psychologist...
>>26222089
I lost that too after my first gf, havent had any interest in women after that and that was 7 years ago
>white supremacists proud of all the achievements white people made
>all it did was perpetuate more suffering and lead to more people forced into this stupid joke of life
Fuck off. worst bait of the year
>>26222079
Then change your life if you don't like it you weak willed beta.
>>26222105
What? How could you have missed the point that badly?
Why aren't you more like Umaru anon?
>>26221694
I want to stomp that thing to death
>>26221721
Umaru will dodge and beat you up bully
who said i wasn't
everyone thinks i'm a successful young man and all that, especially after getting some goat tier grades throughout school and winning a weightlifting medal and a powerlifting medal..
meanwhile i'm the filthiest manchild there is
(These guys are all 23)
>Socially awkward kv friend moves into shared accommodation with 3 girls
>Within a month he has a qt girlfriend
2 or so months later
>(Another) Socially awkward kv friend moves to Japan for a course
>Within a few weeks he has a qt Asian girlfriend
Last month
Another socially awkward kv friend of mine moves city
>Literally less than a week in he gets a qt girlfriend
The literal fuck is happening? This is some /x/ rated shit.
>>26221677
People move on with their lives.
You should try this too.
Follow the steps.
1. Move to a place other than your mom's basement
2. Obtain your designated gf from office 2B
Just move to a new city, country, town, whatever. It seems to be the strategy, because people who are familiar with you find you less attractive. It's the element of mystery.
>>26221702
FUCK, I filed my forms at 4A.
what is r9ks favourite eye color?
>>26221625
Green eyed master race white male here. It pleases me that there is no green eyed degenerate white woman.
lel @ the dicklet second from the left
>>26221625
bright blue
