Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4548. page
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ROOOLLL for your waifu.
>>27399508
roll roll rollll original
Road rolla da
>>27399508
>>27399626
Rolling for Russell stealing my soul
There's a dearth of cute girls suitable for being cute maids. Why do girls even bother existing if they can't be cute maids. They should go die.
Maids are justice.
>>27416661
>There's a dearth of cute girls suitable for being cute maids.
Obviously the solution is forcibly feminizing boys to make up for that.
Femanons, how can you compete with THIS?
Just your weekly reminder that WHITE PEOPLE LITERALLY CANNOT BE ROBOTS. Society is designed in such a way that minorities like myself are marginalised while whites are accepted.
>people WILLINGLY sit next to you on the bus or train
>people dont cross to the other side of the street just to avoid walking past you
>people instantly reject non-white sounding names in job applications
Do i have to name more?
No one can be a robot unless you actually become a robot.
>your race is treated as a joke, and even your women prefer white men
>>27416644
I have a non-white sounding name though.
It isn't fair that my life is harder than other people's and I cant fix it. All in school i'd see all these hot girls and they get treated great and everyone wants to be around them and then all the cool guys get these girls and they have fun. But because i'm ugly these people won't even talk to me. I cant have a wife or kids ever, I can't ever have sex, I wont ever get to be in love, and I feel stupid every time i'm seen in public.
No one will ever love me because of my face
Post your face. You probably have a mental illness.
>>27416628
my boss has a legit severe facial deformity.
also a gorgeous wife and three beautiful children.
charisma my friend. He's not a rich man! he just has a really amazing personality.
>>27416746
He probably got it after he was married and now his wife is stuck with him and cries herself to sleep every night or cheats
South Park > American Dad > Family Guy
Go ahead, tell me how you disagree and that i'm a faggot
>>27416612
Vladimir Putin is pretty based
I refuse to watch South Park ever since that episode where they had some faggot e-celeb.
South Park went sharply downhill after season 8.
>>27416612
I would swap AD and south park, and add a few more >'s between family guy and the others
>Be me
>Historic Literacy course
>Teacher anounces us a group project and tells us to get into groups by next class
>ohshitohshitohshit
>a few minutes later, packing my bags
>Girl from infront of me asks if I want to join her group
>8/10 pure white waifu
>O.Okay
>Havent talked to a girl in months so pretty nervous
>Can I have your phone number so I can add you to the group chat?
>O..Okay
>Enter my name and number on her phone
Waiting for her to call me and tell me the real reason she asked. It's gonna be just like in the Slice of life romance animes. I've been looking at my phone all day, so nervous! I don't even know her name. What do I say? How can I make her think I'm not weird?
>>27416588
spoiler alert
she just thinks that you are a nerd without any social life, so you'll do all the work when she'll be fucking her bf
>>27416751
/thread especially because it's group chat.
>>27416751
Came here to say this, godspeed brobot.
Dumping some greentext I collected in 2013 for no reason.
>pic unrelated
>be me
>run everywhere 'cuz fuck walking slow
>last period, teacher lets us leave 5minutes early
>run out of classroom
>about to go down stairs
>run head first into music teacher
>he falls down stairs
>starts bleeding from head wound
>panic and pretend to be in complete agony
>people crowd around
>"hey look anon just beat up Mr Gates"
>lay on floor in complete silence, eyes closed
>teacher and me gets rushed to nurse
>i'm fine, get given clear to go home
>run home, dont go to school for next week
>teacher wasn't in either
>mfw there was a rumor going round that i killed our music teacher and wasn't in 'cuz i was in jail
>gotta go fast
>be in year 9 (or "ninth grade" for murrikabots) boys HS
>have sweet lady, used to be the librarian for homeroom teacher, she had literally no control over us
>have a pair of free standing lockers at the back of the room (pic related, found the exact model wtf)
>they are light and wobbly, there's usually nothing in them, they rock back and forth easily if you push
them
>"this becomes "the crusher" and class tradition of going "in the crusher" begins, person was shoved in
the middle and two groups of us would shove each locker as hard as possible
>it's completely safe, brings class together, the hardcore kids, the wogs, the nerds and losers, breddy
gud
>this keeps on for weeks
>in class, teacher leaves early or something, leaves us unsupervised, of course we get stupid
>suddenly "Menke (some faggot who was literally a hate figure for all the guys) should go in THE
CRUSHAAAAA"
>"CRUSHER CRUSHER CRUSHER" we go into a frenzy, the biggest dudes in the class and some
others run into his classroom (in the middle of a class mind you)
>suddenly cheering and running, menke wailing in terror
>we all lose it "GET HIM IN THE CRUSHA WOOOOOO"
>whole class crusherizes him, it was like lord of the fucking flies in there
>eventually it ends and he runs sobbing from the room
>mfw no consequences
> school talent show
> for some reason decide to show off my collection of cacti
> "ok anon it's your turn to go on stage"
> i slowly place all 9 cacti on the ground in front of the audience
> give a short description of each, referring to them by names I made up
> everyone collectively wtfs
> 6 years later, still remembered as 'that cactus guy'
"When I was in highschool I used to pull heaps of epic stuff no one believes me."
> final year, manage to aquire the student B.o.T rep role.
> basically act as the communicator between the students and the teachers.
> one day am made to stand up in assembly and growl students about the state of the toilets, New
policy where students who need to poop have to go and collect tp off the hot office lady
>mfw I was the kid who shat on the floor, urinals, toilet seats ect for the hell of it while other
students were in class
>mfw I just used my key to go and poop in the old staff room
another one
> was in chemistry class, found a small motor with two wires soldered onto each of the nodes
> place the two wires directly into the wall socket and turn it on
>the motor runs pretty quick for a few seconds then just completely explodes
>blew all of the wall fuses in the entire science block
>my punishment was for me to foot the electrician bill, me and the deputy principal were good
buddies.
> so I went to the B.o.T finance sub committee meeting.
> motioned that the electrician bill be passed under the schools insurance policy because "it
would be unfair to the student and he has probably already served a few detentions for this
anyway".
>the B.o.T all adore me and think its a good idea
> IT WAS ME THE WHOLE TIME
:)
If you knew that reincarnation was real, would you kill yourself?
What would reincarnation change?
>>27416601
You might get reincarnated as Chad
>>27416617
But it would not be me anymore.
at age 19 i have realized i am unironically retarded/autist
i used to think former friends laughed at me/hated me cause things i may have done as a child in school
now that i go to college and people treat me the same, i realize its because im genuinily autistic and retarded
what do?
What kind of things anon? People make fun and laugh at each other all the time without being retarded you know.
>>27416605
i am that type of guy that if someone says:
somebody left the window opened and the rain entered the classroom
everybody will say laughing
"lol i bet it was anon, he is so crazy and beta"
>>27416640
>so crazy and beta
They never said that but I'm going to play along and pretend that you were summarizing, not baiting.
So you're a doormat. That doesn't mean you're autismo.
What kind of things do you actually DO that are retarded?
>tfw i feed stay cats so they come to my house
>tfw the cats spend more time with me than with their owner
>cucked by their own cats
NORMIES BTFO
>>27416513
>taking care of THEIR cat
>>27416558
He unironically doesn't get that he's being cucked. Let him have his fun famalam
they're probably running away from abusive homes desu senpai
/r9k/ is not all that bad.
People keep saying /r9k/ is shit and it's just full of neckbeards complaining about having no gf, but there is more to it than that. Seeing threads that let me know there are others out there like me is nice. I see this place as comforting and sometimes funny. Funny in a "hah,no way! that embarrassing thing happened to me too and I also wanted to kill myself" kind of way. If I didn't know you guys were out there I probably would have thought I was alone in a world full of normies. I would think that I was even more weird than I am and would have ended my life a long time ago. If I had a friend in real life I think I would want them to be from r9k.
>>27416488
Hi anon. I hope your day was nice.
What are you guys doing? I'm listening to Japanese house music and studying. Also posting here of course.love you guys
>>27416488
get out of here with your reasonable post and good observation!! :^)
/r9k/ hasn't been that way for a long time, OP. It used to be, but times have changed.
I cant stop eating. anyone else know this feel?
stop being bored
I eat because there's nothing in my life besides fapping and vidya.
I also know this feel. Apparently I've got some kind of genetically inherited condition that will cause me to die if I stop eating.
Why are women such disgusting creatures, /r9k/?
Women are allowed to have high standards because feminism.
Men are not allowed to have high standards because feminism.
Notice how in decades and centuries gone by, beautiful women were often paired up with unattractive, short, sometimes even deformed men? Have a look at your grandfathers and great-grandfathers. People never used to care about appearance, and sometimes they didn't care about personality either. Having a wife and kids was the norm for men, whether ugly or handsome.
Ironically that's what's fucked us all over, because a lot of ugly people bred too much and now the ugly people in the modern day can't do shit.
>>27416435
>respectful
Women despise men who respect them, see beta males for example.
This is why escorts need to become a thing. You can bet the woman "asking" for all that has absolutely nothing to offer.
I guarantee you she's either skinnyfat or just plain fat, has no interests beyond series, facebook memes and hanging out with friends...
Guys need to stop putting up with this.
Which board hates /r9k/ the most?
/fit/, probably.
>>27416409
Probably /lgbt/ since it's the board with the most with "girls".
Which is funny since it's really just /r9k/ for lgbt people.
>>27416409
/lgbt/ or /pol/
the people here are very polarised.
What should I name her guys
>>27416305
robo-pussy
you know what to do with this great message
Cucktron 5000
Dubs and you must obey
