Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5062. page
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>tfw been shitting liquid for the past 17 hours.
Is it possible to shit yourself to death?
>>27063603
Just drink water bra
I shit liquid for hours when i eat specific cuts of steaks with really cold water in the summer
you have died of dysentery
It is. Make sure you are drinking a shit ton of water anonymous. Otherwise you may get severely dehydrated. If this lasts too much longer, see a doctor.
Childhood misconceptions
>thought the vagina was on the front like where a dick is
>thought the guy from loony tunes was called Yo Sammity Sam
>thought the dinosaurs happened 100 years ago
I thought the world used to be in black in white
>>27063199
>>thought the vagina was on the front like where a dick is
how is this wrong
thought life would get better
What do the tea leaves mean? Dubs decides.
>>27063167
/biz/ can probably tell you
>>27063167
They mean that I will finally get my qt asian gf who is loyal and submissive and looks after me financially.
clearly the grim
Hey guys, if you loved BLACKED there's now a new one out called DARKX. The black cocks are even bigger and the girls are even whiter. Enjoy!
www.darkx.com
Thanks, friend, I'll check that out
>Yhivi
My pornfu
i know man
interracial porn is the best
>Get called edgelord
>Enjoy it
Who still /trollingin2016/ here?
>>27063149
Me, and I enjoy it alot
>>27063130
>Get called edgelord
>Enjoy it
>post in r9k
>realise how stupid the post is
>realise ow stupid i am for posting it
>be glad me anon
>replies to me shitposting and lols
>act edgy, haters gonna hate
>because i am worthless and got nothing to do
this wont offend i know, you dont care, you wasted your time posting this so.... keep on posting master edgy, keep on posting
Who here meme at school?
I say tips fadora to everyone and shout "REEE NORMIES!!!"
Been doing it since middle school and all of highschool (Now 18) In my last year and I've taken it up a notch. I now shout "POO PEE POO PAAHH!!" I do it with a group of fellow 4chinners. I twerk and dance and sing. Some of us are weaboos. I like to say "kawaii senpai" all the time.
This is no lie. I hate normies. I like normies who are nice but they are few and far between. A lot of normies judge and get angry when I REEE. I have gotten into trouble for my devilish shenanigans but they can't stop my meme power. This site is the reason I am an autistic faggot.
I am not ashamed. The omega rising will be upon us shortly. (Not the beta uprising, betas are a bunch of normies. I don't respect those who like/talk to girls)
Obviously no girls join my cause because they can't put themselves out their for something other than themselves.
We recently started a gang war with a rival chad group who we underestimated. We were playing autism warriors.(Autism warriors is a LARP game we play at break time and gym).
They got physical and we had to retreat. But we are getting stronger.
I have to leave now bye!! KAWAIII SENPAI!!!
*Tips fadora*
are you the kids everyone ignores and makes fun of?
at least you're having fun
lol keep it up
origami comet
Oh yeah I forgot to mention, here's us :)
Go to Craigslist and find desperate roasties like pic related.
>22
>I want someone to take care of me
>"I am independent" right after that
>3 kids and wants another
Holy fuck.
Send her Chad pics to get hers then post plz
>single mom of 3 at 22
kek
KEK
K E K
>curvy
TOP JEJ
Here's a list of things you guys can do to be sexy to girls and get a gf.
AhahahahahAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahhahah
These aren't "sexy" things, these are "relationship" things
You do these things in the relationship, not to attracted her for the first time
>>27062487
You can do the majority of the things on this list without being in a relationship.
Everything from number 5 to 11 you can do without having a gf.
Robots, how do you feel about dyed hair?
To the fembots with dyed hair how do you feel about the negative connotations surrounding it?
It makes a good contrast for semen
Approach cautiously.
Milk snakes and coral snakes feature the same colors but only one is dangerous.
Unnatural coloured hair does not work in the three dimensional realm.
Is it normal for people to look like chimpanzees when you're high? Like, people don't look "human" anymore. When I'm sober, I see someone's face and I think NOTHING of it.
But when I'm high...It's just like their aliens-and I'm an alien. They look like space creatures and I'm totally unfamiliar with them.
Also, I think this happens because weed feels like it transports me to a parallel universe temporarily. When I "leave" then humans look like any other animal.
>>27062383
Maybe when you're high your brain goes into this place where you just notice all of our animal features more.
>>27062383
I sometimes freak out if I think too hard about how we're basically apes but it doesn't have anything to do with being high
>>27062383
welcome to derealization
this is a symptom of schizoaffective personalities which may evolve into a full-blown psychotic episode if you continue to smoke the weeds
Please excuse me for having a girlfriend. we are both robots, and for the past 4 years shes basically fucked "less than 10" guys, and she thinks thats a low number. She went robot mode now that shes living in a good place, with me. But Now that we are having a loving sexual relationship, she wont suck my dick, or do anything new with me, or wont even try things with me that a woman should do with a man. "i dont want to do doggy because i did it once and i didnt like it" "i sucked a few dicks, and i dont want to right now". "i dont want to ahve sex on the couch, because last time i did i hit my head on the arm". just stupid bullshit that makes her look like fucking used goods.
I Know, because she told me in her own way that im the best sex shes ever had because i fuck her good. But its so fucking annoying that she wont suck my dick because shes "waiting til she wants to". How can you suck TEN DICKS of some pump and dump fucks, and not suck the dick of your loving boyfriend!? What the actual fuck!?
literally 2 seconds from rape
>>27062261
I really wish somebody would post that realman comic about the two robots who get women after they've had fun, and then the women not wanting to do anything sexual with them.
>>27062261
Maybe those 10 other guys weren't demanding creepy controlling weirdos?
tell her what you told us
shes not meeting ur sexual needs so either rape her, give her a chance to change, or go elsewhere
>tfw have date with a cripplingly shy 6/10
Give advice robots.
Since she agreed she maybe likes you. If she doesnt like you she still wants this date to work. If she likes you the date has already worked. If she never goes on a second date it was never going to work.
>>27062035
Crippling shy boy or girl? It really matters.
>>27062035
>he fucking asks /r9k/ for advices
you are destined to fail, and you fucking deserve it
What do you consider to be wageslavery? The popular meme for a wageslave is someone working at McDonald's, Target, or Home Depot. But people refer to anyone who works as a wageslave
>Personally I think if you're making $40,000 or more a year with benefits you aren't a wageslave
TL:DR - Does having a career count as being a wageslave or is it only people with dead end jobs?
>>27061809
>tfw making over $45k with benefits
>tfw do nothing all day but browse 4chan at work computer
Am I a wageslave?
>>27061809
If your job isn't something you would do as a hobby or something you wouldn't do in your spare time and enjoy it, you're a wagecuck plain and simple.
>>27061881
yeah, this.
A slave in a golden cage is still a slave.
>go to coffee shop
>ask for usual order of medium iced coffee with room for cream
>barista gives me coffee and cream container
>container only has like 5 drops of cream left in it
>barista already helping next customer
>everyone sees me pour tiny bit of cream and stand there awkwardly for a second before walking out
>coffee tastes like shit
entire fucking morning ruined because too afraid to ask for more cream
>>27061687
Another from a few weeks ago
>actually get girl to go on date with me
>zero chance of getting laid with this girl but she's cute and feels nice to have some female company
>we go to this beer tasting thing
>we go up to one of the stations, guy behind counter hands her a sample glass but doesn't give me one
>she walks off to the side looking at her phone or something
>i'm still standing there
>dude just straight up ignoring me
>i sheepishly walk away
>catch up to her a minute later
>"i really liked that one, anon, did you try it??"
>Y-yeah, it was good
>not sure if she knew/saw but we haven't talked since
will this ride ever end
>read cringe thread on /r9k/
>realize i have a cringe moment like the ones in the thread literally 5 times a week on average
I wish I had the courage to kill myself.
>>27061687
i recommend getting so depressed that it overrides your anxiety. feels empty man
Why do Americans censor tits? In many places in Europe you see topless women, including some public magazines and no one cares.
Because those tits are disgusting.
Deeply ingrained Puritan values that have been a part of the culture since the country was founded. Americans are taught from birth that sex is a shameful, dirty, corrupting thing and that those who feel sexual desire are perverts and deviants.
Unless they're Chad, of course.
>>27061945
This. America's morals have always been fucking stupid because of christianity. Sure we can genocide a race, but all the womenfolk better be covered! At least we don't censor porn like japan. But japan still cares less than we do.
