Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2821. page
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Hey robots, want to come talk to me in my stream? I'm lonely:(
twitch tv osmurr
Why should I?
Originalohoh
>osmurr
back to facebook you fucking sandnigger
>>28646889
its not my real name. I dont think its even a name.
>>28646866
Ily
>binge eat junk food
>vomit it all up
Lol you think it's that easy huh? You think you could cheat the system like that huh? Well bad news...
>>28646808
Just chew it then spit it out. What's the point in swallowing it if you're just going to do that?
I'm too poor to be wasting my ebt like that bruh.
Honestly my strategy is to get 80% of my calories from White rice so about 900 calories.
i'm on 20 mg of oxycodone, post songs that will make me feel super happy pls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBTW1E7MFuQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HimvFbossU8
>>28646767
I listened to this on oxycontin it was probably the best hour of my life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmZg-74nyn4
I fap like 7-8 times a day is this unhealthy
Your not hurting anyone.
>>28646651
Does it burn when you pee? Hurt?
Is your piss red or otherwise unnatural?
Does your dick hurt?
Do your balls hurt?
If none of these apply, probably not. Keep jacking it
>>28646651
it's unhealthy because it indicates your life is super boring.
Do you ever meet or see someone and just know they go on r9k?
>>28646589
No, I don't think I've ever met someone offline like that. I think people can probably tell I go on /r9k/ though
>>28646589
Ya I see this guy where the same hoodie an black jeans listening to music everyday at campus. He has a strange walk and is constantly looking around confused. Never approached him but can tell that his mannerisms are that of reclusive person.
>>28646589
I saw one you guys in the grocery store with your mom once. I made eye contact with you and smirked every time we passed each other. You knew that I knew.
Who eating Little Caesars here?
Ate some on Sunday
>>28646522
Little Caesar's fucking sucks. They've started being jews with the cheese! REEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
>>28646522
not I, but I really want to try that stuffed crust dealio they have now. looks deliciously diarrhea inducing.
>tfw still banned from /sp/
>posting on zombie /sp/
>>28646463
/sp/ hasn't been good for years
>Tebow Time will never come back
It was so easy to troll back when the Broncos made that run into the playoffs
>>28646598
Hopefully another meme player that everyone likes will come up soon.
Everything has been status quo recently so it's boring. Also the moderation got wierdly overdone during football season last year.
Tried to post this on /b/ but couldn't get enough comments.
ITT: We play 73 Questions.
Instead of celebrities answering, you post your answers to the questions.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnbCSboujF4
1. How are you feeling these days?
2. Whats the best thing that happened to you this year?
3. Whats the best thing that happened to you this month?
4. Whats the best thing that happened to you this day?
5. Whats the best thing ever?
6. Favorite season?
7. favorite holiday?
8. Whats your best halloween costume?
9. Where would you live if you wanted to live on the east coast?
10. Which Sex In The City character do you identify with most?
11. Whats the biggest surprise you ever had?
12. what surprise made you cry?
13. whats a surptrise you planned for someone?
14. Whats your favorite plot twist?
15. If you could do a flash mob, where would it be?
16. Do you like cupcakes?
17. Cake or pie?
18. Favorite dessert?
19. favorite condement?
20. Best Record in the world?
21. favorite color?
22. favorite superhero?
23. favorite painting?
24. How do you like your coffee?
25. Iphone or Android?
26. Carpet or wooden floor?
27. Favorite movie?
28. If your life where a song, what would the title be?
29. Best mexican food/ resturant
30. Would you describe yourself as messy, or neat?
31. If you were a hip-hop artist, what would your stage name be?
32. Whats 1 superpower you wish you had?
33. Fav pizza?
34. What is something you still have from your childhood?
35. If you were president, what would be your slogan?
36. A book everyone should read?
37. Best activity to do on a rainy day stuck at home?
38. What subject in school you think you would be able to teach?
39. favorite tv show of all time?
40. Any allergees?
41. Best gift you recieved?
42. What makes you laugh the hardest?
43. favorite music lyrics?
44. Something you always wanted to try, but are too scared to do?
45. What did you want to do with your life at a young age?
46. Your opinion on country music?
47. Fav app?
48. Fav curse word?
49. What did you have for breakfast?
50. Fav Star Wars movie?
51. favorite beverage?
52. What movie would you of wanted to star in?
53. Giraffees or zebras?
54. What kind of tattoo would you get?
55. Fav holiday?
56. Did you read the song of ice and fire books?
57. Do you work out?
58. What law would you break if the law were abolished?
59. Fav vacation spot?
60. Your spirit animal?
61. What sport would you become a professional at?
62. Fav play?
63. Blonde or brunette girl/boy?
64. Dunkin Donuts or Starbucks?
65. Fav type of flower?
66. Book your currently reading/ book last read?
67. Country you want to visit?
68. Guilty pleasure?
69. Fav 73 Questions Vogue video?
70. Least fav food?
71. Fav website
72. DC or Marvel?
73. Do you think OP is a faggot?
Too many questions
>16. Do you like cupcakes?
sure
>17. Cake or pie?
cake
>37. Best activity to do on a rainy day stuck at home?
4chan
>51. favorite beverage?
water
>71. Fav website
4chan
>73. Do you think OP is a faggot?
of course
These aren't very interesting questions
1. How are you feeling these days?
>surprisingly ok considering i dont have anything going for me
2. Whats the best thing that happened to you this year?
>oral sex with my oneitis
3. Whats the best thing that happened to you this month?
>got a visage drop in runescape
4. Whats the best thing that happened to you this day?
>stopped feeling sick for a bit and ate some pizza
5. Whats the best thing ever?
>the wet hole between a womans legs
6. Favorite season?
>summer
7. favorite holiday?
>xmas
8. Whats your best halloween costume?
>edward scissorhands
9. Where would you live if you wanted to live on the east coast?
>the east coast
10. Which Sex In The City character do you identify with most?
>don't watch that
11. Whats the biggest surprise you ever had?
>legit no idea
12. what surprise made you cry?
>none
13. whats a surptrise you planned for someone?
>nothing big that i can remember
14. Whats your favorite plot twist?
>12 monkeys, protagonist gets shot in front of his child self
15. If you could do a flash mob, where would it be?
>somewhere that noone is so i dont look retarded
16. Do you like cupcakes?
>sure just not sugary
17. Cake or pie?
>pie
18. Favorite dessert?
>ice cream
19. favorite condement?
>ketchup
20. Best Record in the world?
>pink floyd - the wall
1/4
sauce me on that boss
>>28646467
what boss
Flakka? Isn't that just another word for bath salts? I smoke meth with some crazy black homeless guy the other day, that's the third time I've done that. it's easy to find someone that will let you smoke their bubble so I've tried it a few times
>flakka
Sounds like some south African shit
>had a long distance relationship 7 years ago
>she literally begged me for 3 days for accept her as my gf
>I wasn't a chad, neither a robot in these times but i though internet gf's were dumb
>I didn't take it seriously the first 5 months
>she broke up with me after 1 year and a half
>At that moment, I already had fallen in love with her
>sundlely all my plans were torned apart
>I been in like 4 "serious" relationships with cute girls from my town since then
>My last gf broke up with me because he find out my secret folder with pictures of her
Feels bad men. Sometimes I'feelt that she was a witch or something. It's not fucking normal that I'm obsessed with a internet girlfriend that i fucking had 7 years ago
>girls
not even twice.
fuck off gavin you fucking pizza boy
>>28646441
Fuck you.
I would literally never try to contact her.
>tfw I will probably become the beta bux to my gf
>gf is a ex-slut stacey with a partner count in the 20's
>mfw I thought I beat the system by getting her
>have been dating her for close to 2 years now
However, the sex is still frequent and hot. I can fuck her anytime I want. She's very compliant and not bitchy at all. We fight occasionally but its over small stuff. She's molded herself into this "lady in the streets, freak in the sheets" type as well. Most of her clothes now are pretty conservative, except when home. The thing is, I have a pretty decent job with good pay, so I can't help but think this is all a ruse in order to get me in the future. She's a 1st grade teacher.
What do you robots make of this? Am I being taken for a ruse cruise and 50% of my shit later on? Or can I say that my gf has legitimately reformed?
If she's hot, not a bitch, std free and will be loyal, there is literally no reason not to keep the relationship going.
take her on a ruse cruise and don't marry her. if she leaves you you should hopefully have gained the confidence needed to fuck other whores.
>>28646347
When you give in to her and get cuckhold by a big, beefy Jamal with girthy, juicy cock. Make sure to upload it after you are done filming
Can I survive off of just eating rice?
>>28646190
>trying to find information on how white rice can kill
>keep getting fucking Tamir Rice links
Fuck niggers and their dindus.
But white rice is dangerous. It can lead to mineral deficiencies.
>>28646190
Yes, but you'll be missing things. If you can get used to fish sauce, you'll be be better off with that sprinkled on top of the rice.
I tried it and nearly died. Became deficient in tons of nutrients. You need more vitamins and minerals. But hey, just a normie here.
Pic is quintessential robot in my area.
>18
>khhv
>senior year
>sitting eating lunch and minding my own goddamn business
>staceys approach me
>"who you taking to prom?"
>mfw
>don't even know when prom is
>want staceys to fuck off
>me: "no one?"
>"we're gonna find you a girl!" t. Staceys
>don't even want to leave the house, much less go to prom
>don't want to initiate contact with a random girl i've never met before who's being recommended to me like some sort of business associate
>know that if i don't go to prom i'll be ridiculed even more so than i am now
>parents already disappointed in me and i haven't even graduated yet
>don't know when another opportunity like this might come around
completely fucking lost. please help a robot out
Just rest on the fact that they're setting you up in a bad way. A Stacy's only goal for a robot is to see him suffer.
I never went to that shit, don't go. Let the Lennys and the Carls of the world have their feast.
>>28646157
>>"we're gonna find you a girl!" t. Staceys
You're never going to hear from them again, calm down.
>tulpa wife and daughter asleep in the other room
>I'm here posting on 4chan
I wish I knew how to be a better husband and father for them, but when they're tulpas, it's hard coming up with things to do together, especially when I don't do that whole wonderland or possession crap.
>>28646156
>Tulpa wife and daughter
>>28646363
Yeah. OP you realize that this is highly frowned upon right?
>tfw had a tulpa since childhood but never knew what it was
my best friend, my only friend..
how do I raise my future daughter so that she doesn't end up like pic related?
Why don't you want your daughter to become a woman?
Spank her
>>28646158
I don't believe in spanking. That sort of practice has no place in a modern society.
>>28646155
I don't mind her being a woman. I want her to be a capable and mentally healthy woman.
