Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6593. page
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BANG. Normie down.
Did you commit suicide?
>tfw had a dream of jacking a dog off and making it cum all over my hand
>this was the last dream of this year
It's over for me, isn't it?
>>25379687
I can't speak for the gays but, if you are a girl, no.
I'd happily watch a girl get mounted and creampied by a dog desu. I assume the same goes for some gay guys.
>>25379687
Well you're a degenerate like everyone else here.
>>25379687
no OP it's not over yet quick sleep again and wake up after 120 minutes you can still have a normal dream OP don't give up on me
Does anybody else here have a favorite stuffed animal they like to hug?
>pic related, mine!
>>25379582
No, I have a bag full of balled up cum tissues that I lay my head on since I don't own a pillow.
A big stuffed penguin-toucan hybrid
His name is billy, won him in a crane machine.
Who's in? Let's do this.
i wont last a week desu senpai
>>25379643
i'll be making daily threads. at least try to see how long you go.
>>25379656
i like this idea. im going to try anon.
>tfw your dick looks like your dad's
>>25379533
This is a feel that I though no-one else shared desu.
>tfw your dick looks like your mom's
>tfw your cum tastes like your dads
>new years soon
>she's GOING to be at a party
>she's GOING to get kissed at midnight
>she's GOING to be getting her pussy plugged 5 minutes later
>I'm going to be 4chan alone
>>25379625
Dont think about that. The more you think about it the more it hurts. Try chanelling your spiritual chakra into having fun yourself, and drink a lot. Just stay away from sharp objects though. Trust me you won't enjoy having a fit of rage while drunk near a sharp object.
New Year's just passed for me and I wasn't thinking about this.
Fuck you mayn.
>>25379681
Fuck, are you me?
Didn't even give a shit until just now, hadn't even occurred to me
Oh well, it's 1:00 AM now, she's most likely getting cream pied right now
Whats up fellow manlets?
This thread is for real manlets 5'7" and below. 5'8 and 5'9 fags sorry, but you're not a manlet.
So any of you guys have any big plans tonight?
I don't. Probably just sit at home and go to bed early. No friends or gf's to hang out with.
Maybe the new year will bring better luck to us.
Vidya and internet like always. Vidya doesn't give me the pleasure it once did though. Hopefully I can find a good way to kill myself. No buildings higher than 7-8 stories here and no guns.
>>25379523
thats me man. i got the new metal gear and can only push myself to play it once a week or so. and im a huge fan of the series.
and yeah been trying to figure out what the best way to an hero too.
>>25379561
My parents are friends with someone who goes hunting occasionally. I think that's my way to go, ask to go with him then off myself as soon as I get a grip on the gun.
https://www.reddit.com/r/ForeverAloneWomen/comments/3ytmpm/i_have_mixed_feelings_about_subscribing_to_faw/
It says Forever Alone Women, can women ever be that?
>Being alone isn't new (it's been over 6 years since my last relationship), but until recently I have convinced myself that I am content. I think I have been ok....I have a son who obviously takes up a lot of my time.
>I know what you mean. My FAness has been late-onset, meaning that I was married and have 3 kids, and only in the post-divorce life have I found myself unable to form a relationship.
>>25379473
Fuck off back to Reddit and stop dumping your garbage here
i can't explain the single mommy thing, i honestly think it's just fear. people fear them and their child, the burden.
Forever alone for woman now means:
>fucking a bunch of guys in HS and college
>marrying for betabux
>cheating and divorcing
>taking his money
>feeling too guilty or tired to do the same to another man
>having lots of random sex with strangers while my kids are in the other room
He was there for me when no one else was
I loved him so much
I never played as anyone else and never will
He was always my favourite
Hes helped me through so many tough times
I owe my life to him
If I could one day meet him, my life would be complete
>It was a cold and snowy day
>I was playing mario kart
>I went to the character select screen
>No waluigi in sight
>I cry
>Then I feel a hand on my shoulder
>And a pair of lips moving close to my ear
>The lips start talking
>"It's waluigi time"
>It's waluigi!
>Im so happy
>Waluigi sticks his hand down my pants
>Pleasing me like he always does
>I want to return the favour so I set him down on the ground
>"wah"
>I unbuckle my pants
>Im ready
>Waluigi and I start going at it
>It's magical.
>He leans over and says "Waluigi number 1"
It's waluigi time, it's always waluigi time.
not as good as shrek m8
shreks a stale meme doe
Shreks a old meme
Who /math/ here?
>tfw getting comfy doing some problems
>>25379439
I did math in my undergrad, but switched in grad school. I miss it a lot. Enjoy the comfyness for me.
What kind of stuff are we talking here? I did an exam on Fourier Analysis before christmas, was pretty nifty as a subject.
I don't know ANY math beyond 6th grade, how do I pick it up again lads
>tfw won't be on r9k tonight
>tfw be dead
Safe journey traveller
Kill them all first
>>25379431
see you elsewhere space cowboy
>i don't like generic girls
>>25379426
"Bitch resting face" is the best phrase I've learned in a while desu.
every month I do the ritual
>First make sure no one is home
>I then proceed to get a big ass pot
>Fill it with enough water to cook 10 packets of ramen noodles
>I then get 10 packets of Oriental Flavored maruchan ramen and cook it
>I drain most of the water out of the pot
>I then get all 10 flavoring packets and mix it with the ramen and some of the remaining water
>I make myself some chocolate milk and set it aside at the table
>I pour the contents of the pot onto this big ass plate I bought that can hold all the noodles and the water
>I then proceed to drink all of the soup water off the plate
>I then proceed to pour about 2 tbsp of old soy sauce onto the ramen
>I then proceed to grab the ramen and shove it into my mouth eating it as fast as I can
>Literally handfuls of ramen going into my mouth
>Every once and awhile I take a sip of chocolate milk to help it go down
>Once I eat all the ramen I lick the plate clean
>Once I am done I Proceed to sit on the couch for the next 10 minutes licking my fingers of all of the ramen juice soiled into my skin
>Occasionally finding small pieces of noodle and eating it
>I then throw away the packets for the ramen so no one knows I did this
Anyone else /doweirdshitsometimesmaybenotthatoften/
Stuffing your fat face is not a ritual. It's called overeating you sack of shit.
>>25379416
>Someone is jealous that they can't eat 10 packets of ramen.
>>25379399
Holy shit, if you were a bit more articulate and made yourself throw up afterwards I would swear you were Lord Byron reborn.
>hear fireworks 30 mins ago
>tfw it can only mean one thing
AUSBOTS ASSEMBLE
cunt desu senpai baka
still got 2 1/2 hours until the normieworks go off here in perth
Just hit 2016 in Adelaide, cunts are setting off fireworks next door and I'm scared they're gonna set the fuckin suburb on fire since its fucking dry and hot as fuck outside.
>what are your hobbies/interests?
Alright normies what do we put here that doesn't immediately destroy our chances at getting the job? (i.e. no Computer, no Vidya Gaemz, no Anime)
Hobbies/ Interests:
Being a cuck.
Should get you in the door.
If they ask, say you enjoy being a wagecuck as well as a regular cuck.
Let me find three...
>GNU/Linux
>etymology
>uh, scratch that, make that GNU plus Linux and count as two
>>25379423
stop avatar fagging you stupid piece of shit
