Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6532. page
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/r9k/ is the 9gag of 4chan, prove me wrong.
Pro tip:
>You can't
>accidently posting it on /b/ before you do it here
I can try to prove you wrong.
You're posting on r9k, which means most likely you have a mental illness. 9gag and r9k are similar in that they both have a 9 in the name, it's a superficial similarity, one that a psychotic person might make a connection with.
Most likely you suffer from bipolar 1 or NOS and are making connections that don't exist in a mixed manic episode.
>>25412464
Damnit, you caught me anon.
most women are naturally ugly but it's socially acceptable for them to paint their faces to scam men
checkmate sluts
Well played females.
>>25412427
She'd look fine on the left without that cancerous hair color
>>25412427
This is why you should never be intimidated by women. They look in the mirror every morning and know how ugly they are without their masks on.
>2017 is closer than 2014
>You are one year older and it is even more impossible for you to find a gf
>women were completely used up from the cock carousel already a few years ago
>>25412478
>You are one year older and it is even more impossible for you to find a gf
You can still find a gf, but you'll have to settle for an older one. Each year you get older, you become more of a "creeper" to younger women
>>25412339
Every time I see this picture I can't help but stare at her boobs.
>tfw no feelina gf to feel up in the shower
>tfw qt3.14 gf cooks you food after hours of rough sex
Guess I'm not a robot after all.
if you can get a cute gf, you arent a robot
if you can only score fat ugly girls like me then you can still be in the club
>>25412333
Go fuck yourself you fucking sack of shit.
>>25412333
My jealousy is tangible.
Fuck the robot
Remove robot
>>25412307
fuck you anonymous poster
just add the date to the bottom of your posts
this is an original comment made on Fri Jan 1 15:13:11 EST 2016
>>25412307
The robot needs to be stronger and filter out trap threads, racebait, and foot fetish bullshit. There's already boards for that stuff anyway.
is it just me or are there more fembots on r9k than there used to be? what happened
I can only speak for myself but I just stopped caring. I used to pretend to be a guy but who cares.
Pepe became mainstream and attracted tons of normies to r9k. Girls make up 85% of normies.
4chins is getting more popular, that might be why.
Roast me faggots
cleary asking for it.
>>25412250
What a handsome young lad!
Happy New year fella!
>>25412250
What sort of bike is that?
>2015 + 1day
>not smoking the marijuana errday
>not wanting to be stoned
It's like your gay or something
>>25412732
>Tfw no reliable dealer
I haven't talked to my man for a month and a half now, he probably got a new phone and I'm fucked now.
Weed gives me panic attacks, so no thanks
Since its the new year i might as well get this off my chest:
>be me @ 18
>2/10
>six ft skinny fuck virgin w/ acne
>not a kissless virgin, but still
>graduate high school, decide to browse /fit/ all summer before college for diet & exercise tips
>dem gainz after 3 months
>got clean&clear for acne
>solid 6/10 by freshman year of college
>came out of my shell more, went to parties, made friends
>still virgin tho
>got a job as a TA this past semester
>met a few other TAs in the science department
>met a grill TA
>hispanic, 9/10, 34C, long black hair, hazel eyes, chem engineering major, flirty as hell
>could be 10/10 but she has those canines that look kinda vampire-like, and i'm picky about teeth
>start with small talk
>we all go out w/ our other coworkers and get along even more
>she loves all the same shit i do (wrestling, video games, bands, etc.)
>she eventually asks for my snapchat
>i later ask for her number
>we start texting
>we get to know each other
>i start catching the feels
>she invites me out w/ her friends a couple times
>i ask her out to see black mass(she loves mafia/mobster shit)
>we make out after i drop her off
>caught the feels ever more after that
>we go to bars & diners & have a good time every time
>lowkey, tho cuz none of our coworkers know
>one night we're in my apartment
>watching tv
>she starts grinding on me
>thisisit.jpg
>we make out
>i start fingering her
>she's moaning like it feels good, so i keep going
>internally freaking out cuz im a stupid virgin who doesn't know shit
>at some point she's on top of me
>starts riding me
>no condom cuz she's on birth control
>feelsgood.jpg
>one more round then i drop her off at her dorm
>im practically in fucking love at this point
>we keep meeting up to fuck at this point
>but i want more
>i ask her out to see a movie, she said she was busy
>i ask again later, she says she doesn't want to date
>only wants a friends w/ benefits
>i say i want something exclusive
>imsuchafaggot.png
nice blog, i don't remember subscribing to it though
cont'd:
>she goes "well anon idk what to tell you"
>i go "lets just end this for my sake"
>she agrees
>i go to my place and cry like the little bitch i am cuz i couldn't have her as a gf and wasnt satisfied w/ just sex
>i wanted to hold her hand, kiss her in public, etc.
>ireallyamafaggot.jpg
>seeing her around work fucking sucks now
>have to act like everything's fine around coworkers
>when really i wanna punch a wall
>can't even be mad at her cuz nothing was official and i was the one who caught feels
>still fucking sucks
>i miss our conversations so much
>we used to talk about anything
>not seeing her this winter break so far has helped
>still feel like absolute shit about the whole thing
>am dreading seeing her when we get back spring semester
here's hoping 2016 will be good to me
>>25412173
normie faggot get out ree
What do I do bots? She told me that she thinks I'm hot.
Still a kissless virgin, I'm thinking I should be happy right now but is this really an accomplishment?
That I got to be guy #100, should I go in? Any advice if she tries to turn it into a relationship?
I don't want a roastie but maybe I'll stop being self-conscious if I do it
Do I have to kiss her? What do I do if she tries to kiss me.
>>25412072
You might as well let a shemale fuck ya ass
What do you mean a roastie? She's a slu or has a large labia.
>>25412072
Have sex with her, even pretend to care about her, but don't ever, EVER let yourself develop romantic feelings. I know it sounds stupid to develop romantic feelings for a roastie but that's how our bodies work. It's hormones. So use her as a practice gf for a while but dump her once she starts being annoying.
And don't ever let her turn you into a normie. Don't meet her friends, don't go to parties, don't pretend to share her interests. In most likeligood, she tries to get a beta provider to settle down with (while she keeps polishing off tyrone's dick in her spare time).
Are there any studies about girls watching porn and masturbating? I want to know how lewd they actually are.
I doubt they would be truthful. I'd probably lie anywhere else but here.
>>25412060
you want to know how lewd they are about watching porn when they are not making it?
here is a study pal, see what they do in the porn to get off
maybe that'll clue you in on how lewd they are
They don't. They just get fucked instead.
How long can i smoke these until i get cancer?
>>25411970
Anything between 0 years and 80 years or however long you still have left in you.
>>25411970
about 30 years
>>25411999
i`m 18, i keep getting lung and chest pains, but i did a shit ton o xrays and nothing came up, i just kept smoking because im starting to think its just psychological. Anyway, i smoke just about 4 to 5 cigarettes a day and it takes really long times for me to even buy a new pack. Should i worry about the lung pains or what? Serious question
has a cute girl ever called you ugly?
No, because I'm handsome.
>>25412300
Not directly.
The girl i liked said "You have to be slightly attracted to someone for something to happen" though
Not directly, but I have gotten the "You look like [insert unattractive male celebrity]."
anyone else still doing nosleep 2016?
pic is how i feel
>>25411931
why
what the hell
>>25411931
I barely made it through nosleep 2015.
Remember to always have coffee on hand and have your music on the highest volume.
>>25411931
Made it till 5 am
post your drunken new year fuckups
I got wasted and started talking to my ex, we skyped and I think I told her I love her, what do
>>25411854
awwww. shes so caring
is she a whore?
whyd you break up
>>>/soc/
original comment made on Fri Jan 1 14:53:32 EST 2016
