Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7908. page
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> A boy's best friend is MOMMY
>>24705454
But mommy don't real!
Every day I wake up this thread is on my mind because it reminds me of my sweet obsession.
>tfw no diaper mommy with poor humor and is constantly called weird
It pops up in my thoughts so often I might consider electroshock therapy just to temporarily forget mommy threads, I may get lost in my bedroom but it beats mommy mommy mommy I want my delicious scented mommy.
>tfw bf calls me mommy
Never forget.
>>24705454
i love my mommy very much
Why do I miss her /b/?
I'm over 30 and have only had a few girlfriends my age.
>Meet girl who is only 3 years younger than me.
>Not too attractive.
>6/10 at best. Long nose. Eyes too close together. No tits to speak of.
>Date said girl. Find out she does heroin.
>Find out she was raped when she was 17 and has major PTSD.
>She starts stripping while we're dating.
>I am now officially dating a stripper heroin addict.
>Find out she has HPV.
>Girl swears up and down that she no longer has HPV, even though I don't think that's possible. Once you have HPV, you always have HPV.
>Still refuse to have sex with her without a condom.
>Eventually, I find out she cheated on me. Find a condom in her bed.
>Swears up and down she didn't do anything with him.
>Eventually, she meets one of my other psycho exes.
>My psycho ex accuses me of raping her for no reason.
>Current gf gets scared as shit and thinks I'm a rapist.
>Files fake stalking charges against me.
>End up going to court. Discover that she lied about the whole relationship to get money out of me.
>Sue my gf for $7.5k and win.
>After months I finally catch my psycho ex on recording admitting that I never raped her and show it to my gf.
>On unrelated reasons she stopped paying her $200 a month from the last lawsuit.
>She's with someone else now.
>They're engaged.
>Am dating new girl now, but can't stop thinking about my stripper ex still....
Wat do, /r9k/?
You unvirgin scum, just move on
>>24705186
>/b/
Son.
>>24705250
the problem isn't his lack of virginity, it's his posting relationshit here.
Hey op, fuck off.
Post a book every robot should read. I'll start of.
Or post a book that broke you.
Any Lovecraft
>>24704899
>tfw dawkins used to be a great mind and is now some kind of low-rent internet troll
Are you religious, /r9k/?
>>24704669
Nope. I'm euphoric as fuck. My morals tend to line up with Christian values though, or at least the teachings of Jesus. He was a chill dude even if I don't think he was the son of god.
>>24704669
Only nominally.
>>24704669
i've studied every religion i could. i've read their books. i believe in god without following a religion. i simply believe god is what existed before the big bang, and through the power of science we'll be reunited with god and bring the dead back to life.
What's the longest time you've gone between fap anons?
1 week here
>>24704560Two days.
>>24704560
I've lived alone all my life (after 18), but the few times I've been on vacation, or in a training sleeping in dorms, I've been surprised the lack of fapping didn't drive me nuts. Or not cumming in my sleep.
But usually I have to fap after 4 days.
I picture that after a long time it will be awesome, actually you just come quickly with little pleasure.
5 days. I went insane.
>tfw been fapping every day since I was 13
>tfw im 20
Is there any hope of me stopping?
>"Anon, can you help me wash my back?"
Fuck off you tramp. Do it yourself i'm not one of those betas.
>>24704181
only if you let me lick your asshole
>>24704181
Only if you promise to stop making this shitty thread.
>tfw 4 inch penis
Just kill me..
>>24702789
I have like 6-7 and I still feel small, and being black makes it worse because you're expected to have a monster cock, just hire prostitutes or something, or date asian women (not american asian but go to an asian country), I've seen a lot of asian porn and guys having 4 inches is a norm in these vids (some have way less) and these women are still cumming (because these women are also extremely tight relative to their extremely small males), just look into Asian women.
>>24702789
Will stacy laugh at my 5 inch worm
>>24702789
serious question: why do you keep living
i mean what are you waiting for
Are any of you robots in the Military?
>What branch are you in?
>Why?
>What's your job?
>When did you enlist?
>How did your parents react?
>How was basic training?
I'm 18, in my last year of High school. I have a 3.8 GPA. I fucking hate school, and I'm extremely socially awkward, but when it comes to the physical side of things, I have good strength and endurance. Fitness helps with my anxiety. I don't really want to go to college, I'm considering joining Air Force or Navy. My parents will probably disown me if I do.
>parents disowning you for serving your country
wow. but seriously join the air force.
>>24702009
>I'm extremely socially awkward,
Not sure if military is the best place for people who are awkward and struggle fitting in. Its all about conformity.
>>24702131
Does it really require you being a social butterfly to follow orders in the Military?
Why are you So Toastie Roasty
bump where everyone
>tfw everyone is mean to me
>tfw your favorite regular is not on
Who here /smalltown/?
You may only post in this thread if you are from a town with less than 9,000 residents,
>tfw one store in all town
>tfw no downtown or town center
>tfw literally nothing
1,222 reporting in
Fucking robot
1169 here.
Pretty damn comfy desu
>main street has a corner store, a funeral home, the volunteer fire department for the surrounding rural areas, and an elementary school
>few streets surrounding with some churches and houses
>borough is mainly farmland
>>24700910
8k reporting in.
What do you want?
Anyone else tripping tonight? I know some of you robots have DXM addictions, so there's gotta be.
I'll answer any questions you want about it too. Usually I do MXE or ketamine but this was kind of short notice. There's a special place in my heart for DXM anyways, it's the first drug I've ever tried. I'm just taking 300 mg tonight.
the most degenerate drug out there
are those pringles? i could really go for some pringles
Dissociatives are the best robot drugs.
I miss mxe. Rest in piece MXE
Ketamine is too expensive
DXM is garbage
PCP is bad and 3-MeO-PCP is too manic and hard to dose. Plus, God forbid you get drug tested and test positive for PCP
WAIFU THREAD
1. Go to:
http://pochi.x.fc2.com/k_kisekae2.html
2. Design waifu
3. Post waifu
4. Rate other waifus
3dpd is not welcome.
She looks like the kind of waifu who takes dick with her morning coffee
0/10
>>24696747
You look like you take coffee with your morning dick
Bump
make some god damn animu grils
What is the most tinfoil conspiracy you believe, robots?
The US Gov is manipulating weather patterns with the HAARP weather station in Alaska. Control the weather- control the world.
NASA And the Government are hiding their knowledge of aliens from the public
Jfk killed by the cia
Elite Jews control financial institutions and media
Write your suicide note out, robots. I wanna see them.
No one is at fault, it is just easier this way.
Fin
>>24679737
That's a comma splice, bro. The last thing you're leaving is a comma splice
Okay I accept it Touhou is not real.
>psychiatrist prescribes me Ambien a few months ago
>wind up taking 20mg every weekend alone in my room and just chilling
>a few weeks ago he takes me off the Ambien and puts me on Klonopin
>it's not as fun but I keep up my weekend chill routine
>yesterday I find out we're switching antidepressants and so he's taking me off the klonopin
>getting high was all I had to look forward to and now I have nothing
Do you think I could ask him to put me back on the Ambien? I have no friends and this was the one source of joy in my life. I'm friendless so I can't get any other drugs and I'm 19 so I can't buy booze. Please help me, bros.
>>24707939
do diphenhydramine man its OTC its very fucking cheap! here you can get about 45 generic 50mg of them for 1 us dollar
>>24707969
t. imaginary wall spider
>>24707939
Yes, just say you're having trouble sleeping and in the past the Ambien was very effective. Coming off the Klonopin is for the best. You should not be on it long term.
