Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 924. page
- Home
- Board: /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
- Reading: Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 924. page
Somebody link me a pastebin on resources for becoming homeless
help
>>29616510
That sea rolling like a sheet of rubber makes me very uncomfortable.
i can help you out here.
move out of your current accommodation and dont look for anything new.
>>29616510
>going to 4chan
>as a resource for adapting to a new life experience
well we all know how you reached this point
>normies find out things about me I don't want people to know
This isNOT GOOD
>>29616489
>classmate finds online profile because I was stupid and used the same username as my Instagram that my friends know
>it's got cringey stupid political memes and weebshit
"I had no idea you liked anime, anon! What are traps?"
>be me
>12 years old
>chilling in maplestory like i always do
>suddenly 4 kids from my class come to visit me
>they never do this i'm quite shocked
>my dad goes to open the door
>1 meter from the door i do the whispering scream
>"I'M NOT. HOME. I'M SICK"
>dad gives me the look
>"He's not home. He's sick."
>they leave awkwardly
>they heard me say it
>>29616937
You told them straight up you didn't want to see them.
Good for you, they probably felt bad and you did a good job. Nothing to be embarrassed about there.
>Trying out "nofapp"
>Haven't beat off in like 2 weeks.
>Get home, get call from new female friend.
>We just talk, laught, all that bullshit.
>hang up
>start browsing r9k
>For no reason
>wildeerectionappears.gif
>"aw what the fuck"
>getting ridiculously hard
What do?
Just jerk it, if you don't you'll goo yourself one night.
jerk off and eat ALL the cum
>>29616475
>>29616509
You have to eat ALL the cum!
>tfw see friends on snapchat having fun and they didnt invite you
>>29616443
snapchat yourself crying while pointing a gun at your own head. that'll teach em.
>>29616443
"""friends""""
orignal comment
>>29616443
>friends
>snapchat
Just fucking kill yourself. You are a waste.
>'I am so lonely someone be my gf pls'
>'Women are the devil all of them are just holes to be fucked'
I know that the majority of you are severely autistic, but you do realize that no woman is going to find this behavior attractive, right? Misogyny directly inconveniences women as much as misandry inconveniences men. No one is going to put up with that level of inconvenience when they can easily find a chad who will at least compliment them on a superficial level and isn't ugly as sin.
You are all hopeless degenerates.
Why are you generalising everyone?
Haven't there been ten threads like this already today? Are we being raided, or are we just getting more normalfag tourists than usual?
>>29616496
hes using the word "degenerate", what did you expect?
*BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPP*Y
Birthday anon!
>phishsssshssshhhhhhhh prab shhhhhsshhh
*sniff* *sniff*
very fragrant mommy.
>>29616361
an ass that huge makes me think it would just sound like air softly escaping a tire pump
the cheeks act as a silencer at that mass and by time it reaches the outer crevice it lost all extra propultion
>>29616441
You some kinda brapologist m8?
Dating and getting laid is this easy, robots.
Why haven't you started picking up PUA and changed yourself?
>>29616349
>you have the most incredible sense of style ive seen all day
>>29616349
The fuck is "genuine interest" supposed to be?
I tried that shit when I was 17.
Negging - to teasingly insult
IOI = Indicator of interest - a sign that a girl likes you. Such as her twirling her hair while looking at you.
Bitch/shit test - When a girl tests your character by being a bitch in some way to see how you react.
So I negged and looked for IOIs. And I got lots of shit tests! Oh wait that was just them disliking me even more. Oops
>flatmate fucks 2 different girls a week on the average
>love good breakfast so i have to talk to each every one of them in the morning after he's fucked them for almost all night while i'm making breakfast
for example this is a girl he fucked last night. just fucking kill me already.
does anyone know this feel?
>ywn be alpha enough to fuck an HRT'd Hank Hill with nasty tats
How's Texas though
>Irish ass
I wouldn't be too jealous of him
>>29616371
>How's Texas though
op here. nice call.
How are you /r9k/?
Satan here with an offer for you.
Since you're all desperate losers why not sell your Soul to me?
I can grant you whatever you want with a few exceptions:
1) No immortality
2) No more than 1 Wish
3) No superpowers or other paranormal abilities
4) No wishes related to money
5) No wishes that would fuck up the entire world
All you have to do in this thread is the following:
1)Post your birthdate
2)Post your most well kept secret
3)Post "THANK YOU SATAN"
If you lie about any of this I will know.
If you don't the contract is sealed,your soul is mine and your wish will come true within a month.
Pleasure to do business with you.
>>29616336
Ill sell my soul for the wish that the girl I loved will be happy, have a good life and find a better man and marry him.
>>29616336
Make me feel hope for the future, make me happy again.
feb 13 1997
i kiled a guy and buried him in the forest
THANK YOU SATAN
>tfw failed again that retarded job application at tesco
>its been over 6 weeks and still no universal credit payment
>tfw got a job
>well payed
>nice coworkers
>boss loves me
>can always leave early
feels good man
>went to an interview this morning
>they want me to start tomorrow
>tfw I'm no longer an useless piece of shit
>at college
>hate it but got to
>In classroom with computers
>normies from the last class lounging and laughing about some shit
>I squeezed past and I went to my usual alone spot in the corner
>Get onto computer and see that one normalfag from the last class left his college email open
>open up his Google drive
>Delete all of his essays, collaborations, pictures, you name it
>Delete it from the trashcan
>Make a docs file in there and leave a note saying "get out normie"
>Log out and reboot computer
How fucked am I, /r9k/? Share other /devilish/ stories too.
>>29616185
You're a miserable little asshole
>>29616212
Just do a new essay, fampire.
>>29616185
That's the most failed normie thing I've ever read.
Who /goodytwoshoes/ here?
>read the rules of the board before posting
>always follow them
>remain civil in conversations
>apologize when i'm wrong or offended anyone
>polity inform people of bad behavior
>report them if they persist
>mfw I lurk in order to acclimate to the culture of a new board before posting
>>29616084
>Straight edge.
>Don't buy alcohol or tobacco, despite being able to.
>>29616084
>tfw I appropriate 4chan culture on reddit for upvotes
kekky smeggy
>have a beautiful dream about her
>wake up
The worst feel in the world.
>>29616083
Who is she Anon?
I know this feel though.
>>29616083
i know that feel all to well OP
I stayed in bed until just now, 3:30pm because of this. Dammit
Would you wife a depressed NEETgirl and finance her lifestyle if she just wanted to stay home and play vidya, consume media, and cuddle/fuck, but is probably boring and stupid but loyal.
You have to:
-genuinely care for her and cuddle her and make her feel loved enough to trust you enough for her to be your sex slave
-be completely loyal yourself. Porn is okay.
-have your own moderately private place for her feel uninhibited so she can be loud during sexytime and obnoxious vidya playing.
-pay all the bills, including high speed internet, updated vidya/computer parts, and moderate, non extravagant clothing
>>29616016
no of course not i can barely avoid paying for my own shit never mind the kind of autist who spends shitloads of money on superior japanese steel
besides why the fuck would i want to date a stupid girl
just because i'm incredibly lonely and miserable doesn't mean i have no standards
>mfw chokers on pasty white trash are my only known weakness in life.
>>29616016
The majority of people on this board aren't in the position to be giving financial support to others, they need it themselves.
Post what your jamming to right now
>I'll start off
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7n0M-ckcpPo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9GAE0OA0eg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ch_5_x1IUA8
>>29616012
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKlpL4FhzUs
Nice video too imo desu.
