Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6034. page
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How do I find a motherly gf?
Not a milf; just a girl who is caring, protective, empathetic, and likes cuddling.
>Tfw mommy gf
Is there a better feel in the whole world?
>>25768699
But like, I don't want to be treated like a kid. I just want someone who is as mushy and sensitive as me.
>>25768890
Be a man. No girl wants a softie fag
Robots, you constantly talk about how lonely you are and how you'd be content even just cuddling with a girl.
Well, I met one of your types and I thought we could have that but he keeps trying to fuck me constantly, no matter how much I say I don't want that. And then he almost gets irritated and says if so then we can only be friends and can't cuddle. All or nothing, he put it.
Explain? If you find someone attractive, why wouldn't you want to be near them?
>>25768541
>what is beating around the bush?
The only people who can just cuddle and leave it at that are ravers. And even then they go somewhere and fuck afterwards at least 60 percent of the time.
>>25768541
>I like this nice guy I'll cuddle with him
>Slurp cum off of guys you just met at the club
This is the only reason.
>>25768541
No, I'd be _happy_ just cuddling with a girl. I wouldn't be _content_ with it.
How many robots think about suicide?
I'm sat in my room right now and theres nothing I'd like to do more than just end it. Also whats a easy, fairly painless way to do it
>inb4 hanging - no secluded woods or place to nearby
>inb4 pills - pharmacies in my area are really strict on giving out pills
Rob a gun store. Either you'll get shot and killed or you'll end up with a gun that you can use to commit suicide.
Bring a knife.
>>25768569
britbong so police here dont carry guns, i also dont have an unregistered knife
>>25768590
Jump off a building? Doesn't have to be too tall. You'll be unconscious before you hit the ground.
I'm looking for a kaishaku to assist me in seppuku, anyone wants to help?
>>25768495
>I'm looking for an otaku to assist me in sudoku, anyone wants to help?
>>25768495
I'll help. Where do you live?
>>25768611
>>25768651
Are you experienced in handling a katana?
>tfw too stupid to even boil an egg properly
I just wanted an egg salad sandwich. That's all I wanted today.
>>25768328
What procedure did you follow?
>>25768328
Explain this stupidity to us
Where did you fcuk up?
Who else is /pretend normie/ here?
I'm 20 years old, have a well paying, stable job and do other adult things such as buying groceries and paying bills and driving. I've had several girlfriends in the past, and never have really had any issues interacting with women. I have a normie group of friends who I regularly smoke weed/drink with. I am reasonably articulate and come off as intelligent and well spoken.
At the same time, I've spent over $200 on dragon dildos, have social anxiety and depression, am bisexual, spend on average about 12 hours a day on a computer of some sort, and jack off to anthropomorphic animals.
I sort of studied normies and can mostly copy what they do. I know what to say, when to say it, and what body language to use.
My biggest struggle is hugging/other physical interactions with people. Handshakes are ok, but everything else I'm completely oblivious to. I never know when I'm expected to hug somebody, and when I do I never know where to put my hands, how long to hug for, etc.
It would be very easy for me to return to the robot lifestyle, I am just above the surface. But for now, I will continue to wear my normie mask.
I've also noticed that even most normies just pretend to know what to do in social situations.
Everybody just kind of makes it up as they go along.
Thats because youre a fucking normie. Reported and get out!
>>25768409
I wish.
The biggest thing that helped me socially was drug abuse. When I'm high/drunk, I just act like an intoxicated normie.
The problem is whenever I go days without talking to anybody in isolation with only my vodka and dreams to keep me company.
How come only white people get to have blonde hair/blue eyes? Why does no one else get to look pure and beautiful? It's not fair.
suck me off whore
>>25768076
>tfw white and brown eyes
>tfw had blonde hair when I was younger but now it's dark brown
It's all over
there some polynesian tribe of niggers who have wavy blond hair in their childhood
then theres some rare mutations in africa and asia where the child has blue eyes, usually comes with some debilitating illness though
guess european environment just preferred blue eyes. been said that it gives you a bit better night vision.
Any fembots here smart but lazy?
>be black femanon
>iq of 179
>would rather shit post all day
I'm an aboriginal with an IQ of 140
>>25768037
Do you fuck black dicks only?
>>25768037
>smart but lazy
niceme.me
>your bloodline survived for thousands of years only to dead end with you, right here on r9k
actually it's a few billion years, not thousands.
>>25768033
but that's how it works. not every male is supposed to pass on his genes.
>>25768062
So, you've accepted your fate?
>tfw you just realized you're almost a carbon copy of your genetically inferior father
But here's the twist:IM A WORSE VERSION OF HIM. A VIRGIN VERSION OF HIM.
The epitome of natural selection.
Don't worry ok, your dad was a virgin too
My father is alpha and I'm a failure, he likes to brag about how he fucked so much pussy at my age
>>25767852
>tfw chronically depressed just like my dad
A-are you me?
Most of the time it seems like I'm boring people in social situations, like I'm literally stealing their energy just talking to them. I'm really bad at social situations but I think I have the 'approaching' and 'small talk' down, I guess I'm just not entertaining enough yet.
How can I seem more energetic and interested and keep the energy in the conversation up?
>>25767814
Dang those things are bigger than her head. Suck suck suck suck suck suck suck
>How can I seem more energetic and interested and keep the energy in the conversation up?
hard stimulants
>>25767867
Like what? Coke, speed?
I'm sick of just jerking off to porn. What are some more fun ways to do it apart from fap roulette? Can also be about submission, etc.
>>25767727
>What are some more fun ways to do it apart from fap roulette?
getting a gf
you fucking loser
>>25767727
Why don't you get your gf to text you pictures of her boobs? That what I did and I set it as my desktop pictures (I have two monitors so I tried to imagine her having a twin sister to have a threesome with.
Do it in public, faggot.
>be 25
>lost virginity last month at Senior's home
>still have relationship with old woman
>get paid for cuddling and feeding her
Ask me anything. This is a great job for NEETs.
you look strange and ugly but i can see why some girls would be attracted to you.
>>25767659
does she just wanna fuck 24/7 or do you have to talk to her, change her diapers and such?
>>25767740
No, she doesn't have diapers.
She only wants to fuck when she's drunk.
I'm talking about serious relationships here. As far as I can tell fom hs and uni most guys who don't care at all about a girl's virginity are the ones who just want sex or are literally the most beta guys who do anything to get a girl to like them. The majority of guys will settle for a girl who's not a virgin if she isn't a slut but it's definitely not what they wanted. I feel like girls actually believe the only guys who care are possessive assholes without realizing most decent guys do care but are just too afraid to say it because they get ostracized since others see it as an opportunity to look better themselves.
>>25767525
never ever disclose your virginity to any girl.
women want to be entertained and know that virgins can sustain their hedonism. so you are impotent in her view.
>>25767612
No I'll tell them i am because I don't give a fuck about their roasties. My desires aren't strong enough that I'd toss away my self respect for sex with some whore.
Yes, but if you remind a girl that she basically ruined her dating prospects by sleeping around she'll get very angry and depressed.
The thing about modern women is that they're choosing the slutting road every time (naturally), but it still bothers them deeply to know that that voids out that idyllic life being a steady partner/wife/mother to anybody with self-respect.
I think a lot of family-oriented men are changing their minds about what they want out of life. When you've decided that it's your dream to have a nice wife and a family, it feels like a huge slap in the face when you're this woman's last resort after she can't have fun anymore. I mean, I used to dream about having a house and a wife and children, but after a little bit of dating I just can't imagine ever marrying any woman.
>chat with girl on the other side of the world
>obviously can't get her as gf but think it's nice to chat with a girl, maybe it could be some practice
>she asks for money
Well it was nice while it lasted.
At least you're not so autistic to give her any
>chat with a girl on the other side of the world for years
>confess
>she friendzones you
>she likes your company
>she likes your attention
>she likes your jokes
>she doesn't want your beta genes anywhere fucking near her vagina
>because you're just entertainment to her
>you're just a way to pass the time
I kinda know that feel
>friends with girl for ages ol
>my feelings are pretty obvious
>great times
>talks about going on a date
Is the intended purpose of this to hurt?cos it fucking succeeded, image related
