Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3253. page
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Well tomorrow I'll be losing my virginity.
Wish me luck pals.
I'll miss you all dearly.
You'll fuck it up
>>28382234
She knows I'm a virgin.
It gets her off.I know I'll fuck it up.
not all robots are virgins. don't put too much pressure on this one event.
Oh no! A witch has decided to turn you into a woman, but has decided to be merciful and give you some control. You have 1500 points to spend for enhancements, choose wisely:
>Nice face: 300
>Carry weight well: 300
>Do not menstruate (still fertile though): 500
>No body hair: 400
>Huge tits: 600
>Fat ass: 500
>Good legs: 500
>Fast metabolism, hard to get fat: 700
>Lesbian: 200
>Particularly light PMS/Menstrual cramps: 250
>Immunity to date-rape drugs, alcohol, etc.: 450
>Feminine penis: 800
>No roastie pussy: 350
>Pleasing voice: 400
>Insatiable lust for nigger dick: You gain 300
>Turbo-feminist: You gain 200
>Severe mental illness: You gain 600
>Chad hates you: You gain 250
>Rapist magnet: You gain 500
>Extra-basic bitch: You gain 275
SUPER HAPPY FUN BONUS DEGENERATE MODE
Fetishists and other assorted weirdos may choose one option below for no additional cost, choose wisely
>Fertility goddess: permanently and very pregnant (3+ fetuses each time,) birth is pleasurable, negative symptoms (e.g. morning sickness) don't affect you
>Made for WNBA: very tall, slender, athletic, 50% chance of becoming Black,
>Cumslut: can get off to anything and willing to try anything with nearly any man
>MPDG: you save a robot and become his loving girlfriend, he loves you back even if he has trouble showing it
>>28382171
nice face
huge tits
fat ass
good legs
fast metabolism
feminist
chad hates you
cumslut so i can live without chad
50 points to spare
start a twitch and youtube channel, set up a patreon and drop every responsibility i've ever had
>>28382171
>Nice Face (300)
>Pleasing Voice (400)
>Light Menstrual Issues (250)
>No Roastie Pussy (350)
>Carry Weight Well
>Chad hates me (-250)
please make it true
>>28382314
didnt mean to put metabolism
Any other current/future wizards on here?
PermaKHVs only
No women
Feels good to be celibate
>>28382118
>tfw repulsive as hell
smdh tbqh senpaitachi
>>28382118
You're the Rodger type. Narcissistic.
>>28382198
>accepting my celibacy is narcissistic
Ok
Anyone else not wash produce? I feel like if anything is going to happen to me, it will happen.
I do, only because my mother forced the habit onto me when I was a kid. She claimed a dirty tomato is what killed my childhood dog. I am not shitting you
Washing produce is retarded. I wipe my ass with them to strenghten my immune system. Sometimes it itches from the pesticides but doctor Oz can't be full of shit, can't he?
>>28382114
This, stopped bothering ages ago
>sister stole my starburst and m&ms
>refuses to give it back
>i keep asking
>still refuses
>what should i do now?
threaten her.
>>28382088
>i tried
> assaulted by other sister
> feels bad man
>>28382073
eat some healthy natural fruit instead, anon
So I have started a new group that I want to get some recognition. I figured that this might get people to see it.
I have started a new group called the. Black squares. The black squares is open-enrollment, as in anyone can join! There are no rules, no restrictions. Just say you're in (and prefferebly draw a black square on yourself) and you're in.
There are already upwards of 50 members (that I know of), but I thought I could get some more here
[Extra]
I got the idea for this when I saw the thing where people would draw black squares on themselves and shock themselves. I thought "they all look like they're part of a gang" so I decided to actually start a group of people who draw squares on themselves.
What is the end game of your gang
So what exactly is Black squares about besides drawing black squares on your self
>>28382431>>28382431
Well I'm glad you asked, it's mostly about the sub-groups. there is no SET endgame for the entire organization. Since there's no rules, there's no one spouting orders down at you, although it's not EXCLUSIVELY about anarchy. I've seen a few groups already some of them do what most gangs do, fight over territory, while I've seen one that tries to help out the community (the odd one out), and a few of them are just normal people that pretty much don't do anything other than hang around other squares.
I miss mom, fuck cancer
I wish mine would die so that I'm finally free
The grass is greener etc
>>28382046
Say no mo' senpai, I gotchu!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wgVW8E0wU8
didnt you already make this thread like last weak
>wake up
>ballsack is inverted up inside my body
FUCK
>mom found the ballsack
>>28382026
post some pics or it didn't happen
>wake up
>go back to bed
>tfw you lose a friend you just made because late at night while you were drunk and lonely you sent them an extremely strange photo of one man milking another mans teats.
Holy shit. I haven't been this depressed in a while, she won't respond to any of my messages. Why do I even try lads?
>>28382022
holy fuck dude that sounds hilarious
fuck that bitch, your sense of humor is rad and she's too much of a normie for it
>>28382022
post photo, maybe you'll make some new friends on here
>>28382095
At least I got dubs, I guess.
Here's the picture.
r9k what the fuck is this? can you guys help me?
basically, like 20 minutes ago I really focused on my breathing. I took a deep breath and now I can ONLY manually breath. I have to think about breathing, I can't breath normally. Please help
is the pic related?
>>28382054
no, not at all
very original comment
This happened to me fellow hypochondriac bro, it went away the next day.
anybody else feel like they need to kill themselves? not even so much that I want 2, just that it would give people a reason to of liked me and to of remembered me fondly
>"anon killed himself?"
>"I thought he was just weird I had no idea he was depressed, that's so sad "
>>28381954
No.
But sometimes I get a strong feeling to kill others.
But I DON'T, Authorities, who may or may not be reading this...
>>28381954
i get this when i say something autistic suicide inst really the best excuse for being weird though anon
I feel this all the time. I crave the attention that I'd get if I killed myself, even if I couldn't experience it
Who else is in the process of fucking their lives RIGHT NOW?
These are the seminal moments which will cement my failure in stone and I am doing nothing to stop it
>>28381948
Yes if you count two months as now. I've neglected important things too much.
>>28381994
I guess if you put it that way the last year I've been fucking up and failing
but now is crunch time and I am still fucking up and failing
>>28382013
What happened? I've been alienating my friends away, haven't studied at all, gained weight, too much alcohol etc. Suddenly lost motivation to maintain these things.
>wake up
>middle finger is knuckle deep in my urethra
why is life this horrible?
no way this happened DansGame
Jesus christ anon what the fuck were you dreaming about
>>28381931
>urethra
>knuckle deep
>in my urethra
How tiny is your middle finger, or, how big is your dick? That sounds fucking painful.
>mom found the molestation monkey
Oh, ok!
.......WHAT?
that's what you get for using a cheap knockoff instead of a real rape dwarf you fucking shitter
>>28381925
>did you leave it in plain sight op?
https://kageshi.com/rooms/r9k
https://kageshi.com/rooms/r9k
Looking for new chatters and regulars. If you're cool you get mod.
Stop just staring at people's words all day not knowing who they are. Give yourself the illusion of being social, it improves your mental health!
we like memes, drugs, beta uprisings, hitting switches on pretty bitches and hardchatting
bunch of /soc/ faggots is what you guys are
>>28381837
cho choo we got a mad train
>>28381804
will i be shunned if im a fat 42 yr old khv? no groups want me.
