Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1190. page
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H-heh the jokes on you normies. I don't even want a gf.
>>29501185
Me neither but somehow I always find my cock in some hot girls juicy vagina.
>>29501185
honestly i think most of us wouldn't know what to do with a gf anyway tbqh
>>29501200
I fell for the gf meme. if you're a beta like me it just makes your life more miserable.
Until i met her i didn't care about anyone or anything, i never cried in my life.
She makes me feel jealous and self-aware all the time, i always think that i'm boring her and that she's going to leave me any moment now. my advice is: don't get one unless you're confident
What's the most autistic thing you've ever done?
Make me feel better about myself lads
Go on 4chan
You have been muted for 2 seconds, because your comment was original.
>be 5'2 skinny nerdy asian manlet
>asks out 9/10 big titted stacy
>orbits her for 3 years
>>29501179
>orbit a girl i like from kindergarten to fourth grade
>give her love notes every single fucking day in first grade
>she gets new boyfriends while i still give her the notes
>realize how autistic it is and realize "she doesn't want me like this"
>stop giving letters
>second grade
>entire school follows me around when i ask the girl if we wanted to go fishing
>her spic hoodrat "boyfriend" comes up to me and punches me in the face
>get my metal lunch box and beat him in the head with it
>does no damage whatsoever
>teachers just laugh
>go home that day
>devastated
>fuck a pillow, first "fap" i guess
>pretend it was her
>never felt any better in my life
>third grade
>ditch the idea of rejecting bitch gf
>get an imaginary wife
>it's a clifford the big red dog giant plushie thing
>fuck it every day for three months
>decide to pretend it is dead
>bury it outside because "she had a panic attack during sex"
>grandmother died recently
>mother saw me bury my "best friend" outside
>"hey anon :( ur coping with granny's death?"
>"uh no"
>made to go to therapy for doing it
>no-one knows how many prepubescent orgasms have gone into that clifford thing
>still in my mom's yard
Anyone else do this stupid shit?
Independence day edition!
with the right image finally.
sorry I didn't make a custom one but I honestly didn't expect us to win.
it will need an update for sure tho.
ye done it lads
yer free now
EUbot here. So what EU country is best to move to before the entire thing falls apart and they close the individual borders, and how to get a foothold in it so that they don't deport me later on?
Halp please.
someone put the flag in the OP image on fire
Hey Neetie. Got an email from my boss thanking me for my contributions to the company and informing that I will be receiving a pay rise of $500 come next month.
What have you accomplished recently other than jerk off to some trap cousins and earned enough GBP for weekend teddies? Do keep it up if it's worth mentioning. Toodle doo!
>busting his ass for a mere $30 per month after tax
>>29501117
Boy, I sure wish I could work like you, wagie. Too bad I'm too mentally ill to provide for myself. I'm really grateful for your generosity (really, it's only a little bit of your paycheck that goes to me)
>>29501145
>>29501321
Come on Neetie, I'm sure you can shitpost better than this. Apply yourself.
Hello /r9k/
It's late at night and I'm alone again.
I don't need a gf, I just want a friend.
But none want me, always abandoned.
That's okay, maybe I don't need a companion.
At least that's the lie I tell myself, day after day.
Convincing myself this sadness is okay.
Every person I ever loved, didn't know I exist.
And that really hurts, I have to admit.
So I lie alone in bed once again.
It's okay, I can still pretend,
I have a friend.
I know no one really cares
Everyone I meet on here, wants me out of their hair
I know it's my fault for being this way
But why can't I get at least one person to stay?
My imagination is the source of most of my relationships
And even in those I can tell every word from my lips
Makes the creations in my head
Want to get out of my bed
And go look for someone else to wed
They leave, completely free
But I always wonder
Why won't they love me?
I wonder if, even though they're not real
I should even bother expressing how I feel?
I save images and write
But it can't reflect the light
They bring into my life.
And still the love is bitter sweet
Because I know we'll never meet
Some live far
Some are fictional
But the love is never reciprocal
I'll admit, in the past I have prayed
Please God make the feelings fade
I'd look up at the moon and hope that soon
We would be listening to the same time
It never happened, it never will
Which is okay, I know I'm not a thrill
In fact I'm not anything
That line
Doesn't rhyme
Because it doesn't matter
I'll stop my chatter
I hope you are happier today
Then I am, r9k
What do you think Rose voted for?
Remain.
>women
>voting for something that would stop her getting brown cock
hehehehehehe
>>29501070
The big muslim cock ofc.
>>29501085
You do realize that niggers and Pakis did not come from other European countries but the British Commonwealth, right?
>be walking around school
>see 8/10 qt looking at me
>she comes over and says "Hi , my name is Amy"
>"H-hi I'm a-anon"
>"You new around here? Never seen you before"
>"N-no, i've been here for 3 years"
>despite the awkward start, we talk for a while
>we have lots of things in common, turns out she plays a lot of videogames that i also play
>she glances over at her phone
>"Oh shit I have a test now. Gotta go. Can I get your phone number though? Here's mine."
>Is this a fucking dream?- I think to myself
>yes it fucking is
>Suddenly I FUCKING WAKE UP.
>Go through my phone to see if her phone number is there
>It isn't
>>29501042
Just another day in the life of a FAGGOT. HAHAHAH HAHAHAH. Suck it.
>>29501042
I got the same type of dream except it was my ex-gf wanting to get back together with me.
She would have leaved you for a muslim.
>looked at my hair in the mirror
>it looks like shit
>don't have any cash or time to go to the barber until the weekend
>also still have some agoraphobia
>balding so getting a haircut is more like a chore than an exciting fashion choice
fucking haircuts man why
>doesn't know how to buy clippers and two mirrors
>>29501047
I've done it before but I'm too afraid to fuck it up
>>29501035
>Ywn have qt haircut like ne
I see all these posts about people worrying about being cheated on by their girlfriend/boyfriend
Don't you realize that the cause of your sorrow is you wanting to prolong something that isn't in your control?
When you're with another person, if you're thinking about different ways to make them stay instead of enjoying their company at that moment, then you're losing out on the moment.
Everything will come to an end at some point, Anon. Don't fret over preserving it for so long.
Focus more on enjoying the moment. Let go of your worries and relish in the energy of the other person.
>b-but then I w-will be le KEK!!
t. /r9k/ culture
I should sacrifice my current comfort, resources, and time for what? A momentary high that will come tumbling down, causing more damage than it ever caused comfort?
It is a 100% rate of loss, it is a bad deal.
>>29501168
Nobody is asking you to sacrifice anything, Anon. Use that time on yourself and people will be drawn to you.
Is there a board like r9k but without the woman hate? I enjoy having a place to go that's full of friendless depressed losers like me, but the misogyny bugs me because I don't hate women
you should start hating women anon
>>29500951
You should stop being an overly sensitive pussy bitch sissy faggot.
>>29500951
>I don't hate women
Me neither. I've gotten used to all the misogyny, though. It's just noise, with the occasional valid point swathed in vitriol mixed in.
how are you starting of your day
since no one's replying I guess I'll start I like to break the nightly fast with a bowl of mini wheats
I guess all my east coast robots are sleeping
sleep tight eastern
>>29500938
good morning OP
I'm listening to some comfy music while I eat breakfast
reheated a slice of french toast with an egg, and I'm going to slice up a mango too
didn't see the sun come up this morning but seeing the OP pic was a nice substitute
>BEEP BEEP BEEP
Quit hitting the snooze button, wagecuck. It'a bad habit. A better habit would be to go to bed earlier so you do get plenty of sleep without waking up groggy every morning.
>>29500935
Thanks, comfy frog. Enjoy your tendies today. Say hi to mummy for me.
>>29501002
Say hi to your girlfriend prior to leaving for work. Remind her I'll be over today.
MEH MEH MEH MEH MEH MEH!!!
I drank 7 beers + a bottle of wine last night. I lost my glasses.
Where do drunks normally put their glasses?
What did I mostly likely do last night? I don't remember a thing at all.
Seriously, I have no idea. It's scary. The glass of wine that I was drinking is even missing. ALthough, I have 1 more full bottle of wine which I am drinking now. I'm mostly missing my glasses, I have to read 4chan full zoo,m now!
Try looking inside your anus.
For some reason before I passed out, I went on bing.com and searched "how to get help with file explorer".
I've never used bing before in my life.
>>29501010
It's not funny. I can't see anything at all. I can't even see the words I'm typing to check if they're correct. I'm aboslutely blind.
I wanna have a big doodle :(((
How big is yours?
Original
>>29500918
That's peen is very aesthetically pleasing ._.
>>29500958
>cut
Ugly
does anyone here write? I really want to start writing and create worlds but I'm not sure how to start.
I'm an INFP and I want to do something productive with my over-thinking and over-imaginative mind. I constantly day dream and imagine different worlds, people, scenarios and stories but I feel like i don't have the skills to put it into a structured and developed novel.
Any tips from people who are smarter than me?
>>29500836
>I feel like i don't have the skills to put it into a structured and developed novel.
Of course you don't. You have to develop those skills. You can't just jump straight into writing a fully-fleshed novel. And how do you develop those skills? By writing! Just don't expect immediate and gratifying success, at least on that scale. You've got to recognize that it's a process, that you must instead set your sights on the development of this skill. I'm sure that with a little googling you can find suggestions from lots of writers about how to organize your ideas and about what kinds of writing exercises you can do to develop those skills. However the one thing they'll all stress is to write, all the time, every day. It's a habit and a hobby you've got to be willing to devote yourself to.
I write poetry. What do you want to write about? You have to give me more information than 'I want to write.'
>>29500882
Yeah from what I've read online it seems that I should just write first and think later, just to get into the habit of writing
