Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1248. page
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>mfw my parents are kicking me out for not having a job
but I applied everywhere REEEEEE SHOULD I JUST KILL MYSELF
>>29392145
Where are you gonna live? Will you stay with your minion posting aunt?
>>29392175
>Where are you gonna live?
idk that's why I'll probably an hero myself
My parents are doing the same its hard to get a job I guess people just laugh at my resume. Just about had it I feel you pain anon
It's summer. Have you got your practice gf?
>>29391782
I tried my best anon. Got rejected 5 times in two weeks and gave up.
>>29391879
You are not picking then fat enough
>>29391940
Not that guy, but all the fat ones around here all have fat bfs, it's really weird
Anons, would you fug pic related?
Kate from the Drew Carey Show? Fuck yeah.
Ew, fuck no.
Average, littlebit ugly is fine, but a manface is not OK.
nigga, I'd stick my dick in grandmother if she was up for it.
whatchu think im do?
>actually look fine, but mental image of myself still is outdated by a few years
>>29391184
>tfw you're still a teenager from a social development standpoint
Same. Actually am good looking, socially functional and not particularly spergy, but still consider myself worthless and therefore don't even try.
tfw Chad bullied me so hard in hs his bullying energy emitted tachions which now bully me throughout the timeline.
>>29391207
what do you mean?
org
If I get a tumblr will I get a gf?
nope
I got one
never use it
no gf
>>29390751
Obviously you have to use it. I could post a bunch of stuff there then message girls and they'll go to my tumblr and see how cool I am and want to suck my dick.
>>29390728
"Girlfriend" is kind of an offensive term for what you'll get.
You'll get a genderqueer partner. Instead of sex, you will sit through lectures on how xe is oppressed and looking at a boob is literally rape. In exchange, you will have to pay for all of xyrs food and clean up after xem. You will also have to help organize rallies demanding the criminalization of being white, thin, attractive, or tolerable to be around.
pee pee or poo poo
who do you side with?
>who do you side with?
They are both two sides of the same coin.
Inseparable.
dead meem
poo poo, personally.
When will Hiroshima Nagasaki realize that the robot was turned off for a reason?
> for a reason
Because moot is a piece of shit. Honestly i hope he kills himself. I know you're reading this, fuck you moot.
also remove the goddamn captcha it doesnt do shit fucking moot fuck you i know you did this because of your jewish 4chan gold (TM)
>>29390662
>captcha doesn't do shit
You do know that's how they confirm your IP etc so they can sell verified data in you right? You didn't think this site runs only on ads right?
>>29386865
>>29384272
>>29386163
>>29384412
>>29388734
>>29389399
>>29390091
>same 3000 threads every day
>>29390149
welcome to 4chan, enjoy your original stay.
>the robot didnt fix anything
>>29390211
impressive, very impressive indeed
Anyone else here have a Chad dad whose genetics were lost on you?
Dad
>6'1"-6'2"
>massive hands
>size 13 feet
>strong jaw, generally good looking
>good hairline at 52
>deep voice
>naturally heavy built
Me
>5'10"
>serious handlet
>size 9 feet
>weak jaw, look like a feminine version of him
>balding at 24
>beta voice
>scrawny as fuck
What happened? Goddamn it pops why did you let moms shitty genetics destroy my chances?
>>29390117
Pretty much the exact same stats from my dad, and very similar stats from me, except I'm 5'7 and if nothing else have a decent jaw.
>>29390422
It sucks, I feel I would be way more content with how I turned out if I wasn't predisposed to be such an alpha. My mom isn't even short either (5'7") so I really feel like my size is due to me eating nothing but junk food growing up. FUCK why didn't I listen to them man?
>>29390519
>so I really feel like my size is due to me eating nothing but junk food growing up.
Once again, exact same feel. My mom was 5'5 in her prime. If I had made it to at least 5'9 I could've accepted it. I also developed pretty severe psoriasis from eating so much fast food in college, which is why I'm balding as early as I am (recently saw a picture of my maternal grandfather who died in his 40s; at his oldest, he was an NW2.5 with a thick crown. My crown is thinning like hell).
At least my height explains my hands and feet. Sorry for what you've got going on in that department.
Hi wageKEK. I just made a buttload of money selling your beer cans from your wagie/normie Ragers. How's that hangover going? Ooh, yet another beer on the ground! I am profiting on your degenerate lifestyle, Wagecucks. NEETS seek personal and professional advancement, not getting wasted off of our asses.
>>29390091
>not getting wasted off our asses.
You should try it, might do you some good you stiff ass nerd. Might make you bearable to be around, or could also make you an even more annoying faggot and also jail.
Do the bottle clank warriors come out to play
I am baffled. This is the truest shitpost of all
>not making money shorting meme stocks
wew lad, don't get poked by aids needles.
>tfw LEGO will never be this [ A E S T H E T I C ] again
>tfw you will never excitedly unwrap box after box of fresh new LEGO on Christmas morning
What the fuck happened, robots? Why does LEGO suck now and why did I have to grow up?
>>29389990
>that feel when I have to work and pay bills instead of doing bad lego movies all day
I miss it too
>>29389990
LEGO now is better than it was in the early 2000's. But I agree that it was based as fuck in the early nineties.
We don't have a decent space theme anymore, for example.
>>29390077
>Shoah Foundation
Like Jews need MORE money.
[1/2]
Let's see the - most of you are depressed/angry/depressed-and-angry friendless virgin NEETs with no desire to live or motivation to do anything. Your lifes are worthless, you are a disappointment to everyone around you.
Why not turn that fucking thing around?
You're depressed, okay, just save up 20$ and buy a knife. It sounds plebian but it's a good feeling to buy a knife (or a gun if it's legal in your country) - every weapon in your hands gives you a psychological illusion of power, which is exactly what you need.
Next - this is the hardest part - get out of your house and have a few awkward conversations with people you're familiar with, but don't know (like, people you went to school with, you met at a concert etc.). All the chances are that you will mostly be met with mistrust and you'll sperg out, but don't worry, those people don't matter to you anyway.
The key is to find a guy who hasn't watched Fight Club and get him to watch it. Then, if he likes the movie, ask him to start your own fight club, to get a little feeling of fight.
Fights are seriously the best thing a robot can feel. The sensation of danger, of pain, anger, testosterone, adrenalin, who-knows-what-else-in-your-brain chemicals, and finally getting loose enough to beat the shit out of somebody - it's simply wonderful and gets you rid of anxiety/depression, even if only temporarily.
Next thing is to go to some gigs or events that aren't private, and just wait. Do not approach people like a maniac, that will usually make everyone think that you're a weirdo, but if you hang out long enough people will start remembering you and eventually someone will approach you and ask you who you are and where you're from and shit. From this point on just try to be nice as possible and objectively okay person. This will need a little bit of self-awareness but most of you are not total retards and learn from past mistakes, so I believe you won't be total outcasts.
[2/2]
Next, when you get a group of people you know, invite them to hang out - and invite as much people as you can at once. This is a very crucial step - because robots usually suck at keeping a conversation with 2 or 3 people - but when you invite, like, 8 people out you can always stay aside, let everyone have fun - you will most likely be labeled as "the quiet guy" but that's not a bad thing at all, as you're not in primary school.
While you're hanging out with your group of people, make sure you don't let anyone give any shit to you. Be nice to everybody on default, but be harsh when someone annoys you - for example, doesn't want to pass give you the bottle (if you're all drinking from the same one), telling you to shut up, belittling you in subtle ways, or in any way not being nice to you - you can just tell them to be nice or fuck off. Most guy will just shut up and hold a grudge at this point, but you can easily remove them from your social circle, and other people will see that you don't tolerate assholeness and will subconsciously fear you. And even if the guy doesn't shut up, you can use your fighting experience and beat the shit out of him (most martial arts don't mean shit in street fight) or even pull a knife if you feel really angry. Pulling a knife is a more extreme method and should in most occasions be avoided.
Note:
Be ready to get in a fight with a bigger, stronger guy and get the shit beaten out of you. It actually isn't a big deal - just make sure you don't chicken out or you'll be labeled as a fake.
Eventually you will get a reputation of a dangerous guy, but if you're nice, your group of people will know that you're pleasant to be around.
In the meanwhile, get a qt gf and think about how all the things that you've done still don't make you less depressed. Enjoy the ride and an hero.
>>29389944
Cause everybody here a cookie dough ass nigger who wouldn't kill a spider much less be about the life.
That sounds way too complicated
>computer breaks
>lose sanity
if i didn't have a near broken laptop that can run internet for 2 hours before crashing I would have ended it all by now
>>29389575
My PC broke at a la party at my house. Near Fucking lost my mind until I got a new rig.
>>29389575
why?
couldn't live without the outpouring of social support you would've received in it's absence
fuck off op (you're part of the problem) J.T-remix
>>29389575
why dont you buy a new one?
How do you stop being a NEET hikikomori? Its such an addictive, leech-like way of living that I know is unsustainable.
So far I've sort of stopped one of the E's in NEET by teaching myself piano but I'd barely say it counts.
Networking especially is impossible when you have no web.
>>29389355
Where do you live?
What's your age and sex?
What are your career interests?
>>29389419
Australia
20 M
Computers and law i guess
>>29389355
>you will never grow up in a small village where you're comfortable with everybody and they are like extended family
>you will never grow up with a predetermined niche trade taught to you by your dad which both earns you a living and the village's respect because your service is necessary for their survival
>You will never befriend the QT village girl at a young age who is loyal and the whole village realizes you will be together before you grow up to become happily married
>You will never get drunk off mead with your village bros while talking old school politics
>You will never teach your son your trade and have that moment where it clicks for him and you proudly watch him work with a tear in your eye and a hand around your wife
It would literally be impossible to be an outcast and robot way back in the day. From birth you've already secured a good career, wife, and are constantly conditioned to be social with a small group.
>Get made fun of for being a virgin
>not even a virgin
Either no one believes me or they ask for proof. If I provide proof they just make fun of me for fucking an ugly chick. There is no winning
You have to hide your powerlevel, normies would never assume you are a virgin unless you give them reason to.
>>29388950
Tip: if what they say or think doesn't benefit you, disregard everything they say.
>>29389014
I'm way too autistic to conceal it
![1466343887762[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/hvWcDkr.jpg "1466343887762[1]")
