Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1047. page
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I've never smoked weed, but I've gotten drunk a few times. I'm feeling like weed isn't as fun or intense as getting drunk, because I know people who get high literally every 3 hours. Is it really that nice if people do it every day?
>>29561203
it can be yes, try it out for yourself and figure it out
weed is very much a personal/ personality preference thing. and it's effects differ greatly from alcohol.
It's better than being drunk by a lot. You're not all impaired like when you're drunk and there's no hangover.
I'm high every second of the day because life is unbearable without that wonderful feeling.
guise, what the hell is this shit?
https://youtu.be/rrTF0-RjMuo forgot the video
>>29561147
>>29561152
the work of a deviant AI. never post that shit here again, if you value your life and sanity.
delete thread now.
>>29561184
please elaborate a bit more, man
I know this is /x/ shit but I want a opinion from my fellow robots
How do I win this girl, robots?
She's so awesome and smart (Compared to me at least), but she's also my ex's friend, any suggestions on how to make her fall for me?
>Pic related, her lips
>>29561145
be good looking, fashionable, funny, and confident
>>29561163
I got two, at least
>>29561145
Tell her there's a bump on her lower lip
I fucking hate myself. I was sitting on a Skype call with a girl I've been hooking up with and it got to the point where we're both sitting there naked, and then for whatever reason I just completely lose any notion of what to say next and start spiral into these terrible thoughts about myself, killing any drive I had. We just decided fuck it, not tonight, and she tries to reassure me that it's no big deal but I feel like a failure. She's asleep on the call now and I'm sitting here wide awake thinking about how much I fucking hate myself and want to die, not just for this but for all the mistakes I've been making recently. I've sacrificed so much in my life to make her happy and I can't even do that now. I just feel like a waste of space. I have everything and I don't deserve it but I'm never happy.
>>29561094
at least you talked to a grill
>>29561094
You should rather feel like a fucking failure for undressing infront of a monitor on which pixels displayed the vague forms of a female that is doing the same.
>>29561094
Have a fucking cry
>I'm an awful person.
Also
> I will talk shit about anyone with anyone, but only because I like being part of a conversation and those topic are the only ones i get to be part of one. I give no fucks about the people or things i talk about when shit is being said.this thread is for admitting a truth about oneself that you could never say in person to anyone
>I want an apocalypse so I can see every faggots crying for their life while I laugh
don't cut yourself, normies
>>29561103
>calling me a normie
not sure who you are or what your past is, but I can pretty much guarantee that you're more 'normal" than I. but i am being an over dramatic bitch right now, so meh.
>>29561263
>mfw he thinks he is less normie than me
k. fine
tell me about you then, I will be honest if you beat me or not
Why are women so fucking stupid?
Why do they always find douchebags attractive?
Im no nice guy by any means since that's completely beta, but women are always turned on by complete scum for whatever reason, then complain that they want gentlemen and nice guys who have feelings.
tl;dr girls are turned on by the exact opposite of what they claim to want
>>29561011
is your dad a douchebag? or is he a cuck?
choose one
>>29561011
Women are retarded second class animals that don't use logic or reasoning. Don't question it just end them slowly and painfully. They are a lost cause waiting for death. You can't save them nor can they save themselves.
I enjoy my problem free life full of wonders and excitement without there kind.
>>29561054
But women have the ultimate weapon, the ultimate trump card:
Their vagina. Men are powerless in the face of the almighty vagina.
What counts as losing virginity? Normal penetrative vaginal sex? Or is it oral? Or anal? What about women, do they lose it when it's anal or vaginal?
>>29560989
If you're a couple, your virginity will be lost long before you actually have sex.
>be 18
>go to strip club and buy 1 hour session
>naked girl grinding her hips on my basketball shorts
>cum
>some of my cum rubs on her
did that count
>>29560989
Why are you asking a bunch of virgins? Go ask some normies. They would know.
Help me robots
What should I buy? A bicycle or a PC?
Just seeing the summer sale makes me want to buy a better pc. I like both, But I want to be more active and healthy. My pc has 3GB ram and somehow that's fucked as well. It lags watching 1080p anime.
I want to build my own pc and play games all day but I'm fat and I don't want to be fat. I went to the gym for a month. I will go back in a few weeks but it's really not for me. Bicycling is about the only outside activity I enjoy.
What should I do?
>>29560982
None. Both of them are toys. You should feel ashamed that you even thought about spending money on such crap.
Get a bike. I was thinking of getting one too. They are good to have.
>>29560982
>Bicyling is about the only outside activity I enjoy.
Go and buy a bicycle. I currently have one and I am in the same position as you, only going outside to ride my bicycle. It is fun and it makes me live my life. Also, comfy as fuck. Go and buy it.
What does a female armpit smell like? And please don't just say "her" or "sweat", give specifics. Does it smell like male body odor?
I think you can buy girl pheromones online.
>>29561012
Actual girl armpit pheromones?
Interesting...
>>29560971
Cunt, take off your whore costume and wear something more modest. Your parents would be ashamed at you walking around like this.
And put some goddamn deodorant on your armpits. Nobody wants to fucking smell that musty onion smell off of you.
>Been seeing escorts/prostitutes lately
>Find some asian girl nearby
>She offers a full body massage with hot oil and a happy ending for like $70
>This is all i want. easy money for a hooker right?
>Get there, straight in the bedroom
>Ask for the massage i only have $70 on me
>She insists i get the deluxe deal or something comes with oral and sex for $100
>"no i only have $70 i just want a massage"
>She gives it to me anyway
>After like 3 minutes of oral with a condom she asks if i can get on top.
>"No wtf i paid for this?"
>Actually had to argue for like 5 minutes with this bitch about getting on top. I fucking paid for this and only wanted a massage
>She looks disappointed i didn't get on top and do all the work
I ended up going back a week later for the massage and they pulled the same shit. Different girl this time. They are the only ones in town offering the hot oil massage which i really want, by they wont do it wtf?
Anyone have any theories as to why these asian hookers wont give me the massage?
Im not fat, no back acne, don't smell like shit or visible dirty.
It's just a front. The "massage" is just another term for sex. but yeah, it's bullshit that they won't do the work for you, especially since you paid for it..
>>29560979
There running it from hotel rooms. The massage thing is so it looks atleast half legal right?
>>29561060
exactly. no massage parlor runs out of hotel rooms.. at least, not that I've ever heard of
>being afraid of death
How could you not be curious as to what happens after you die?
>>29560961
I'm really not all that curious, I just want this fucking hellish life to be over with. I hope it's eternal darkness, then I can finally get some rest.
>>29560961
>what happens after you die?
Same thing as before you were born.
>>29560961
I'm more comforted in the hopes that it's the ending of existence for good and that I won't feel anything.until I wake up again
>watching film with girl
>suddenly small penis joke in the film
>it's an extended small penis gag
>long camera shots at a small penis with dramatic music and shocked reactions
>this girl and I sometimes kiss
>sometimes we kiss a lot and it leads up to groping
>she lets me grab to my hearts content all over her body
>she even allows me access to her vagina to stick fingers in
>but when she makes subtle moves to get to my dick, I always chicken shit out and take romantic lead into doing something else like usually kissing and me grabbing her butt
>the small penis jokes continues on and ends with the character having to make a decision to either be mercifully putdown or live life as a man with a small penis
>just like me
>he chose death
>the subject of small penises becomes a plot point in the film
>the tension between the two of us is thick
>she is starting to figure out it's been taking so long for me to take my dick out to fuck her especially since I love to feel her and kiss her body
>I pretend I got an emergency text and bailed
thats actually so funny
You're a film student, aren't you?
>>29561104
no a lot of people say im artistic
First time here. Instead of wallowing in your pain, why don't you guys man up, marry a woman, settle down, have kids, ect. Around the world all cultures have known the importance of having kids and passing on your family name.
Having kids is another stage in life. If you are over the age of 25 and do not have a wife or a completed degree or license that sets you apart I consider you part of the problem. I am not a perfect man, but I am motivated. I live in a rich upper class neighborhood and hope to move out and have my own house with a white picket fence rather soon.
What do you guys think? You only live once and I clearly have stuff to work on.
I don't think I'm responsible enough to have children seeing as I managed to kill a cactus plant.
If you are white and are not having children you really are a failure. That should be your number one priority.
>>29560902
>just be yourself bro: the post
kys
who /toofargone/ here?
>living away from parents for work and school
>haven't spoken to mom in 2 days
>texts me if I'm going to visit soon
>texts me later if everything's alright
>call and tell her I'm always okay and that it's only been 2 days
>quickly says bye
>hangs up
>cry
I feel like complete shit and I have no idea why I decided to call just to (almost) yell at her.
Feel with me, robots.
dumping feels from an old-as-fuck folder I found
faggot robot
post timer is pissing me off, captcha is annoying too
why is it so hard to post now
also I guess nobody wants to feel. bye then
>when gf cums inside me
gf?
on /r9k/?
>>29561036
I'm sure she has a girly penis.
Either OP is referring to performing oral sex on his gf and swallowing the pussy juice. Or more likely, he is a flaming delusional homo
