Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4237. page
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Teach someone who never drank alcohol in his life how to pretend to be drunk via text/online.
I need it for attention-whoring purposes.
It is different for everyone. I know people who can type flawlessly while wasted.
Type messages more slowly and maybe apologize at some point for having had a bit much to drink. Sometimes leave minor errors and autocorrects unfixed. Dont go out of your way to make mistakes.
>>27631770
Also be exceptionally open and honest duo they have some bait to keep talking
What is r9k eating
Tendies for me today
>>27631659
try thinking for yourself once in a while :^)
>>27632316
just because r9k likes something doesn't mean it's good in it's own right? fuck off normie faggot
>>27631659
i'm eating a large chicken kebab (the one in pitta bread, not on a skewer) with mayo and fries
Post the rest of this set pls.
Lmao havent seen this yet bump
>>27631622
they will make you feel like a million dollars, senpai
>>27631593
Found this for you senpai
What are some books that could improve a robot's life or make him understand what he's doing wrong? Or some shit related to the point of life.
I know most of you think there's no hope and there's no point in trying, but I still have some hope left. Once I'll lose the last bits of hope, I'll just kill myself.
At the moment, I'm just living for no reason at all. I'm thinking about killing myself before falling asleep and first thing in the morning.
I have some more weight to lose and then I'm probably going to try tinder/okcupid and end up killing myself after everything fails.
>>27631493
How to win friends and influence people
6 pillars of self esteem
Infinite Jest
Guns, germs & steel
The art of the deal
>>27631493
"think" by Robert Blackburn
I had to buy the book for philosophy class and it's actually pretty good. It's fairly small and I decided to keep it instead of selling it back. I bought it used and someone wrote their phone number in it...hmmm...
>>27631606
*simon Blackburn
My bad
>search qt grills from high school on facebook
>many are now either fat or ugly
>mfw I like seeing them fail, even though they did nothing to me
All the ones that bullied me are now fat and ugly with 5 kids from different Tyrones and it brings me ultimate joy
>>27631321
pretty much
girl that rudely rejected me and bullied me in high school is now fat as fuck complaining that no one likes her
fills me with joy
They enjoyed the hell out of their youth, made awesome memories and haven now moved on. Meanwhile you're a bitter virgin that never got to have any fun and most likely never will, and even if you do you'll be that weird older guy.
How many of you are actually serious about the whole /r9k/-persona thing?
Like actually pissing/shitting in bottles, chad/stacy mentality, NEETlife, etc.
I just have a hard time believing a large group of people could actually sincerely think this way
>>27630798
for the most part, it is just memeing
>>27630798
My NEET life is not a meme you meanie.
>>27631108
...Uh.. Wish I knew that earlier..
There's a Skype group primarily made out out of /r9k/ users. NO women NO trannies NO normies. I can kick whoever I want for whatever arbitrary reason, since 'normiedom' is a really subjective thing.
https://join.skype.com/A5w1nw0W2MGm
>>27630750
>NO women
Sounds gay
>>27630750
>skype group
>no normalfags
Choose one.
Also, try not to be a massive autist/sperg, either.
>>27630785
Orbiting is strictly prohibited to foster intelligent, mutually enriching conversation at all hours of the day
So, fembot here. Finally stopped lurking and actually approached/talked to some of you guys here even though I fucking have HUGE anxiety issues but hey YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND RIGHT. Basically, you guys complain about females being so horrible when you guys are so rude to the point of telling me to stab myself in the throat? Yeah wonder why you can't get laid? I actually put heaps of effort into being nice and basically all I get back is fucking the most pathetically disgusting behaviour. You guys are actually delusional - it's not woman, look at how you treat them? Fuckwits.
>I'm a girl btw :^)
Okay, we got it. Fuck off. And stab yourself in the throat after that.
How are you approaching people on an anonymous board?
>>27630695
we could all be women you fucking clown. THATS THE POINT
I joined my schools anime club last week and discovered there are only 2 members; me, and this cute as fuck girl who looks like Tomoko and is completely mute. The club basically has no activities and only exists because there were apparently a lot of members last year. For the next 6 months I have to spend an hour every Friday in a small room with her.
WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO??
I don't even know if she likes anime, all she does is look at her hands and hide her face and eyes with her hair. We're supposed to come up with activities for the club and produce a report on what we are doing. Truth be told I really want to fuck her, I want to hold her in my arms and I want to make her happy.
What do you think I should do? For now I figured the best way forward is to recommend her some anime. What anime would an autistic mute girl like?
The best course of action is to stop lying on the internet, you massive fucking faggot.
>>27630665
Hello bullshit police?
Yeah OP is being a lying faggot again.
Origonal Postorino
How did 4chan or porn affect your life?
>learned english here
>the only thing im attracted to are japanese innies
>cant help but laugh whenever i meet leftists in real life
>totally fine with blood and gore
>make fun of manlets
I learned english and became desentized to porn and gore as well.
I also got redpilled about women here, and learnt about Jewish conspiracies that I'm still not sure if they're satire or not.
Desensitized to a lot of the weirder shit like most people
Probably would have fallen for the redpill wimminz meme if I came to r9k before losing virginity
4chan have showed me the truth about the world, or how to spot it.
Porn have given me lots if excitement and pleasure, thats about it. Arousal is what makes you do stupid things, not porn in itself.
If there is a 2nd life i wish to gain the knowledge i have now about the world again
What do you show a girl to make her want you?
>>27630574
money and status
thread over
>>27630574
Japanese first edition holographic Charizard
The big one
>Going home from work
>first by bus then by train
>met 19 year old 8\10 qt
>chat with her, both starting to like each other
>turns out she lives alone
>at the train station
>late for my train, she invited me to go on her train with her and to stay at her place, it is going different direction
>say no (because I had to complete my fortress in ARK fast)
>she goes sadly to her train and ride away
>didnt even ask for number because brain is in ARK
>brainfreezeisover
>OH FUCK
>too late
>go home sadly, drink half a bottle and ride my level 221 velociraptor into the sundown
So how was your day anons?
>>27630517
If this is true, which it isn't, you should kill yourself OP.
I wouldn't of cared what I was doing or had planned that day I would of dropped everything for a chance at an 8/10 qt.
>>27630517
Op why man why
Anyway on skipped today's online classes. Because I'm severely depressed, only have a no.th to bring up all my F's or I am fucked
Gonna eat a sandwich and play STALKER, I'm sure something with come up, ill try extra hard to get's tommorow
Wish me lucks
OP, tomorrow gp back to the train and meet her with some food or something. Hang out with her. She obvi liked you, don't ruin this chance, OP
>receive picture message from your one and only beloved oneitis
>implying my oneitis is a nigger
someone post the webbum
mzfjzfhzrustisrizgixlxke69e59dtiet99fdlr
The most stated length was 7.25"
The most stated girth was 5.5"
Each participant also had access to an array of dildos with their corresponding size written on a place card.
I did the "study" for an undergrad project. I figured that r9k might enjoy some of the results.
>>27630416
7.25 seems like a very odd number to say, I doubt the sincerity of your post tbqhwy fampai
You posted this last night faggot.
>>27630451
There were 10 dildos provided for. One of the dildos presented had that length.
>A pencil that gets sharpened all the timd will eventually be reduced to nothing, but a pencil sharpener can sharpen many pencils and be fine
How do I counter this, lads?
Dicks don't shrink.
Your dick doesn't shrink when you have sex and sharpeners dull with each pencil.
An analogy is supposed to help someone understand an issue, you cant just pull random shit out of your ass as if its relevant. A car garage can fit many cars but a car can only be in one place at a time therefore women shouldnt be monogamous hurr durr feminism wins
>>27630403
All analogies are bullcrap. I hope you'll realise that when you grow up.
