Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5434. page
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>want to masturbate
>invasive thoughts always jump in randomly and ruin my climax
FUCKING THOUGHTS I WANT YOU OUT OF MY HEAD I WANT TO FAP IN PEACE WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT SHIT THAT KILLS MY BONER WHY AM I BROKEN LIKE THIS EVEN DEPRESSED PEOPLE CAN ENJOY A DAMN WANK FROM TIME TO TIME WHAT IS WRONG WITH MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>26362574
Describe these thoughts
>fap
>think about how much mentally ill i am as im cumming
>trying to stay pure and have pure daydreams that don't involve sex to lull myself to sleep
>porn is now intrusive thoughts
Would it be too weird to ask my boyfriend to pose for an ecchi picture and a kakui picture so that I could commission two anime redraws so that I could commission a daki of him? I'm scared to ask him but it's almost Valentine's day and that's when I was gonna ask him.
Come on guys I really need to know before I pop this question and become forever alone again.
Anybody? Please? Tasukete kudasai.
Holy hell if I had a gf who cared and was enough of a weeb to want a dakimakura of me...that's the dream right there. Fuck.
>getting comfy playing this
More fun than I thought it would be desu
Only played a little bit thoit was my ex's ;__________;;;;
On gamecube fampai?
>>26362499
Fuck yeah hit and run
>tfw your boyfriend tells you he doesn't love you anymore
How do I move on and leave him?
move on by being my internet gf instead bby. I can offer you long talks about bitches and penis collossa.
come live with me and be my qt homemaker wife
F A T M A D O K A
Just look at that odd weight distribution
DAYUM
Why are men so fucking stupid?
Just playing you at your own game, roastie
You mad?
>>26362413
Because they've been brought up by women?
I think I may have ADD. I never really paid much attention in school.
I'm just generally incompetent in most aspects of life.
It doesn't mean all men are stupid though. I remember this guy in HS that was really smart.
Is this the perfect female body?
Lol, nope.
This is.
>>26470505
bad skin color, feet are too big, besides that yea i guess
Where the fuck are those thick thighs? Not near the best
Black pussy was made for Asian cock.
>factual
White pyssy was made for black cock
Asian pussy is for white cook
Seriously why do I have this in my memory bank
>>26362365
That picture is really cute
Who else here went through a short tripfag phase and then stopped out of embarrassment because they thought they were something people should notice?
I am still ashamed that out of thenineyears of browsing I did it for perhaps a total of one month.
I still regret it. This isn't a thread to call out tripfags or bring attention to them. Everyone's anon to me.
Me
I don't even remember what the trip was because I've blocked it out
I think it was some kind of smiley face
>>26362107
Only had a trip when I rolled for quads and got quads and my name was quadgod
nae nae
I tripped in /x], years ago, and went completely unnoticed except for one anon who indulged me by making OC for one of the memes I wanted to force.
WeII faggots?
Last night I Philly cheesesteak Louis "Cuck King"'d your mother
I don't get it
Last night I cheese caked your mother?
last night i foot longed louie'd your mother?
I want to know what the FUCK people go to Omegle for. What are they after? Who are they looking to chat with? It makes no sense :/
I'm a 21-year-old guy and whenever I go there, I get disconnected SO hard. Literally nobody will talk to me. I can actually sit through hundreds of people who will immediately disconnect with me after 0.5 - 2 seconds. Consecutively, too... It's embarrassing
Is it because I'm a guy? Well, whatever, but the fact that people go to Omegle solely to speak with women is just absolutely fucking laughable
If that's the case, how come women instantly disconnect too? What the fuck are THEY looking for? Is it because my dick isn't out like everyone else?
Is it because I'm ugly? Hell, I don't know. We're all awful at judging our own appearance. Although when I went on omegle's r9k tag/interest a few days ago, you all called me a normie because I "look good" and others asked me why I was on r9k or if I knew what it was.. A guy even asked if he could jack off to my face (you guys are weird).
I'm definitely not as good looking as you guys made it out to be, but I don't think I'm a monster -- at least not monstrous enough to justify 100% of people disconnecting after 0.5-2 seconds. I'm honestly just normal looking. So WHY THE FUCK won't people talk to me? Is it because I'm skinny and not a ripped already-shirtless gym-rat Chad?
Why would anyone go to that site? It's just an infinite sea of endless
>"Nah, I don't want to talk to you (disconnects)"
>"Nah, I don't want to talk to you (disconnects)"
>"Nah, I don't want to talk to you (disconnects)"
over and over and over again. How is that enjoyable? Who are these people looking for? God that place depresses me. Do you guys get that shit too?
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE.. LITERALLY ANYONE :(
you gotta have a good first impression if you want to chat with normies. wear a funny hat or say some random bullshit fact.
>>26362126
>some random bullshit fact
What could be said that's interesting enough to prompt a response?
>>26362126
What could be said in 0.5 seconds?
Why are you still awake robot?
the night is for sleepies.
Because my dreams are weird
And I already slept all day
I want something new!
Nothing new will come to me while I sleep
I'm at work, of course.
That's exactly the post I needed. Thank you based anon.
Sleep tight.
>tfw virgin roastie
life is pure hell
can i use your flaps to make spackle art
How busted are you down there?
Are we talking Little lips or full blown Arby's?
>>26361843
you would still need a soul to get into hell, roastie
ITT: Shit you got in trouble for at school
>be me, 17
>like to shitpost
>in science class find out about this site that lets you host private chat rooms
>not blocked at school
>idea.jpg
>create chat room
>invite 3 cucks to the chat room
>hardcore shitpost for like 30 mins
>2 days later
>head of IT enters classroom, asks to see my friends and I
>ohshit.png
>turns out school had found out and watched all that we said
.have to go over it with a teacher and explain all the homophobic, racist shit that i said
>idontgiveafuck
>parents are told
>get suspended
>mfw
>>26361818
we know this happend today
>>26361962
Ayyy getting b&
>>26361962
This is solid proof that there are underage users here from other websites
>that guy who makes those world of warcraft threads
>that half french cunt that keeps shitting up my favorite threads with trash anime girls and off-topic about archeage
>>26361777
>that guy who makes a thread about the threads he makes
>>26361882
hey thats me, wanna kik?
What are you autistically obsessed with r9k?
for me:
>cars
>bearings
>engines
>hydraulics
>levers
>cotton balls
>>26468141
Thats cool, youd make a great mechanic!
>>26468141
>looking at store signs and seeing weather they have the little r in a circle, the tm or other such things
>guessing the volume of jars to see how much piss it could potentially hold
>guessing people's height and weight
>looking at car tires to see if they have 4 bolts, 5 bolts or more
pretty autistic T B H F A M
>>26468141
Trains, planes and road bikes
