Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3466. page
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WILL WRITE FOR MONEY
Hey guys I'm between jobs and super hard up right now, gf went to ER had some fucking asthma attack even though she doesnt have asthma and all this shit, rent and food blah blah, point is I'm a writer and I will do whatever you want, if you want content of any kind I will do it for you and I will not rip you off, Im not looking to put a steep price on my work, I will work for whatever i can get, I cant even barely feed my damn cat, man, so it's lame
this of course is gonna include sexy shit of any kind, I don't mind that at all. In fact I'm assuming that in this board what youre gonna want is some sexy shit, so I'm prepping myself to do the best I can, been practicing the past few days and getting back into writing and not reading the stuff, though usually i write other things i've read plenty and will try my best to make it good
email [email protected] if you are interested
>>28227524
>zelda
>gf
fuck off normie
ITT: Normies getting BTFO
You get what you deserve
>>28227524
>normie begging for money on 4chan on a board known for neets
go back to tidder you useless faggot
>Cuck has second thoughts
>http://efukt.com/21367_Cuck_Has_Second_Thoughts.html
Feels bad man. He was most likely just one of us who got his first girlfriend.
Fucking daily reminder to never get a meme as a mate
>>28227523
>He was most likely just one of us who got his first girlfriend.
I would have never done that.
>>28227539
Well just picture it.
>You are 26 maybe closer to 30.
>You somehow through luck go your first GF.
>Things go well but she is more experienced then you want luusts after dick more
>She mentions cuckhold
>"y-y-yes honey whatever you want. I love you"
Then that happens
>>28227523
>tfw a retard has a bigger dick than you
How did you guys tolerate this piece of shit? I mean it had some good elements, the tech stuff, some of the writing, acting, direction. But it's a shitty romance that has cringy women yapping endlessly about love. It's painful trash and if you can tolerate it, you're no robot, you're a failed normy.
It's a brilliant commentary on how alone our culture has become, and how even more alone it is going to become.
The guy works for a company that writes sentimental messages for people.
He doesn't have a relationship with his OS he has a gratification machine. AKA he's addicted to advanced porn.
When his porn machine isn't there for him the second he needs it he breaks down.
But through that break he comes to realize that real human relationships are important.
Great movie that I think the normies missed out on because they thought the concept was pathetic, and the robots missed the point of because they thought it was gonna be about "muh VR utopian future," when really it was merely a vessel to carry a commentary about our lives in the here and now.
>>28227476
what do women say about it?
I thought it was just r9k the movie. So I expected men to talk about it more
>>28227585
>what do women say about it?
who the fuck cares?
It's not a movie women can understand anyway.
Ugly fembot here.
I don't understand why it's so hard to get a guy on the same level of looks as me. I've approached multiple guys who would be rated a 3-4/10 here, but I can't get them to date me. EVER.
Guys are so concerned with looks. No guy would ever want to date a girl rated a 5/10 here. It doesn't matter what he looks like, a guy ALWAYS wants an above average girl.
Guys are so cruel. I can't get a boyfriend because men are such superficial creatures.
I'm cursed with being ugly for my entire life. That's why I'll never get a boyfriend, I'll never be loved, I'll never be cared for, I'll never have anything in this life because I'm ugly. I hate living.
You're heavy and unlovable
fuck off nigger OP
post tits with time stamp or nothing will be believed
>5'7 with baby face
>29 going on 30
>literally nobody takes me seriously
Lifting and dressing well hasn't helped, groups of guys in their early 20s will confuse me for being younger than them.
Everyone at the gym I goto thinks I'm 20.
>>28227217
Don't worry man, it'll pay itself off when you're 35-40 and can date girls nearly half your age!
>>28227217
>wahh I look young pity me
Shut up faggot I had people mistake me for a 20yo at 13.
>>28227250
>implying I'm not going to still be 5'7 at 40
D-do you guys like me?
>>28227184
yes
orinal comet
>>28227184
Yes anon, you are really important to me. Always when I go back to sleep, I think about you and how we will talk again. Thank you for being my friend.
>>28227184
I do not know who you are, and considering the only other fact I know about you is that you use a computer and post on this board, I don't believe I have enough information to aptly answer your question.
who /weak stomach/ here
>tfw love being drunk
>tfw drinking makes my stomach literally explode
it's hell desu desu
It's probably weak liver more than weak stomach.
>posting the love of my life Daniellefu
;_;
>>28227197
so should I stop?
So, I haven't spoken to this girl irl in 2 years.
She deleted her old Facebook but made a new one recently and we have got back in touch.
>Invites me to see her like 3 messages into the convo
>We get along really really well
>Sends me 'cheeky selfies', not explicit just cute
>Is a solid 8/10
>Likes Anime, her favourite Vidya is Yandere Simulator
>Has begun to send love hearts at the end of her 'byeee' messages
>Many leagues above me
>SO fucking clever
>hangs out with the nerdy crowd
>Fit but doesn't know it
>Contsantly messaging me whenever she has free time
I don't want to be friendzoned robots
Please tips for what to say
hang out with her and find out you colossal faggot
quit trying to over-analyze her emojis and just talk to the bitch, you'll figure out really quick whether or not she finds you acceptable
Be alpha and pretend not to be interested, but go on dates with her anyway. If there are awkward silences, wait until she says things.
>>28227091
She's trying to make you into another beta orbiter. What you need to do is bring a weapon and kill her the moment you meet up.
>be me awkward af sperglord spaghetti spilling extraordinaire
>get extremely high with normies
>trippingballs.jpeg
>forget to put dick away and close fly after peeing due to being too busy comprehending the secrets of the universe
>find multiple nudes with my dick on reddit
what the fuck do i do senpai? its not like theyll take them down
become a pornstar
EZPZ
post the link or you stories bullshit
inb4 some bullshit excuse
a hundred thousand people on reddit have seen them, what's a couple thousand more here
>>28227078
how big is it? olhyfghvcifoytc
just remember if you are ever feeling down, at least you are as ugly or deluded as bebe.
>>28227029
What are you on? I AM UGLIER THAN THAT TEN FOLDS LITERALLY FOLDS
like 80% of all black women in the US are obese. she probably gets tons of attention just by not being fat
Reposting the classic.
I made a post awhile ago about finally meeting a girl who was decent looking and I got along with had a lot of the same interests even sex wise even talked to her on Skype. She was even the one who messaged me. Got a lot of support from robots since I'm a long time virgin and fat beta. Well turns out I was wrong robots. Apparently when I sent her another pic even tho I fucking mentioned it in my original post on Craigslist that I was on the chubby side and I thought it was obvious in the pictures I present prior she just stopped talking to me from then on.
So basically what I'm saying is if you're a fat virgin like me there is no hope. Maybe it's because I live in California the Chad capital of the US. Fuck this existence there is no hope. I'm just gonna wait for VR and AI to be perfected.
Ignore all false hope threads.
If they have had sex with someone they haven't paid for they're a normie cunt and should be ignored.
There is no hope.
>Tfw there's no nope
>Tfw you will always be a virgin beta
How tall are you? Original osu.
>>28227351
Somewhere between 5'8 and 5'10 not actually sure.
I know you people here have girlfriends. I will never ever fuck a woman and im not motivated enough to pay for a prostitute.
So for those here who are reading and also have a girlfriend, pls go up to her and smell her vagina and report back on what it smells like.
You'll be doing not only me but other lurkers who are also curious a favour and your words will forever be within our memory as a veritable source of vagina odour
Pic 20% related
Lmao, you cant make this shit up.
I also want to know
>>28226904
Even if I currently had a gf I probably wouldn't do that. Vajaysjays are raunchy things guise
>>28226904
Sweat. Also whatever the girls natural smell is.
I unironically enjoyed the new Ghostbusters trailer.
I was on the original bandwagon of hating it because it was a quick cash grab, but the trailer seemed funny and, although not close to as good as the original, wouldn't be an unbearably bad movie.
To put it in perspective, Star Wars VII was nothing but a cash grab. It introduced almost nothing interesting to the series. It simply preyed on nostalgia to get money. I still watched it and enjoyed it, but it was unarguably a worse re-hash than what this new Ghostbusters is gonna be.
>>28226833
I hate this movie for everything it stands for but i know it'll do well
>>28226833
Neither franchise is good, though. Ghostbusters and Star Wars are those "oh, youl ike it? haha, m-me too!!! i fit in guise!!!!!!!!!" movies, like Fast and the Furious and American Pie.
>>28226893
Unfortunately this.
original
I would unironically try my hardest to get Kristen Wiig to fall in love with me. She's kind if amazing, 2bh
>talking to girl who likes 14
>she claims she is 17
>tells me how she prefers guys who are 20-24 years old
Is this real life?
who looks 14
too tired to type.
GO FOR IT
HNNNNNNNGGGGGGG
YOUNG GIRLS ARE BEST
>>28226867
>being attracted to girls who have not hit puberty
pedo pls. Don't relate to my problems.
How do you robots cope with going to the hairdressers? It's something unbearable for me. Not so much the actual cut itself, but the wait. The judgement you receive from these inferior dullards that makes me sick to the stomach. Today I made a mistake.
>be me go to the hairdressers at 7am
>go this early to avoid people and hopefully just get it fucking over with
>relative drives me down as I can't walk there due to my incredible paranoia
>arrive and open the door
>nineteen or so men staring at me, rocking the whole 'nu-male' look that I fucking detest
>notice they're all laughing at me as the hairdresser is behind me prodding at me to go in
>I look at her in the eyes and just run the fuck out
>I can never go there ever again.
How the fuck do you guys get your haircut? It's something beyond terror and fear.
This Is beyond autistic. Holy shit. Are you actually disabled?
Just go to a regular barber out of your city that isn't frequented much.
>So anon what do you do
>truthful answer is literally nothing
>just stay silent
>rest of haircut is awkward as fuck
>>28226863
Just tell them you work at home or some shit as a software designer. Being beta gives you that look.
