Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4596. page
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>tfw finally gave up and bought some fetish porn I've been trying to find for 8+ years and fapped 4 times in 4 hours
>>27359239
IKTF
feels good ay man
>>27359239
wtf kind of porn can you only get by buying that you cant find for free online?!
>>27359239
How much did you pay?
>>27360969
A lot of vids I like I can never find for free unless I go to a sketch Russian site. It's frustrating and they get deleted within a week from xvideos
Well, r9k after 3 years of testing and research I have uncovered the secret about how these dude bro types always get the girl.
I will try to keep this is brief and concise as possible, and I encourage you to try this so then you can get a girlfriend yourself.
Whilst conducting my studies I personally went in the field, on the front lines trying to replicate their success by employing their tactics of flirting, using looks to make myself appealing, behaving in a caricatured overly masculine manner, projecting energy (confidence), use of alcohol, and virtually popular stereotypical method of "pick up" or "game" as they call it.
Well, let me tell you, it's all bunk!
All of it. These techniques and tactics are merely a red herring. You see, the way these guys get the girl is by wooing them with a logical argument. We have been duped all our lives into thinking women are simple minded and frivolous. But, you see, it's quite the opposite. Women are actually extremely reasonable beings. A well constructed, sound logical argument will persuade her to be with you and give into having sex with you. That's what all these guys do. They slyly recite a good argument to the girls they are hitting on, and she becomes so charmed and overwhelmed by the structure and genius of it, that they are instantly wooed. It's the most cathartic thing for them, it's like you activate some switch inside their bodies. So when you see these "cool people" and think of them as ignorant and sophomoric, think again because this group is made up of the most clever, subtle minds on Earth. They are all machiavellian in their dealings, and they play the pickup game in the most covert manner possible. Total masters of misdirection.The thing is, for them it comes naturally, it's instinctive for these people. You can learn it on your own, but I guarantee you, you will never share it with anyone. How I discovered this is a miracle, really.
And, NOBODY knows about this! This is the most well kept secret in the dating world, and I am risking my life sharing it with your right now, but the people have a right to know this. You have suffered long enough.
Now you may be thinking, this is just charlatan nonsense. But, let me tell you it works. Try it for yourself.
I know it's a little jumpy, but I am pressed on time right now. If you aren't getting the connection right now, I plan on rewriting it tomorrow, and hopefully it will make more sense.
>TLDR: YOU HAVE MUCH TO LEARN. IT'S NOT AS IT SEEMS.
PUA's please leave.
Please help me out, I have the social skills of a fucking beach ball.
This girl I met through mutual friends a few weeks ago talks with me every so often. She seems genuinely amused by me (not entirely sure if that's a good thing) and we appreciate each other's company as far as I can tell.
Anyway, I jokingly said "Please don't kill me" after I made some stupid joke and she replied with, "I like you quite a bit, actually."
Is she dropping a hint or am I just a desperate, lonely robot fuck?
>>27359072
if you actually have friends then you don't have the social skills of a fucking beach ball.
get the fuck out normie
>>27359098
>implying you have 0 friends, none at all
You have at least an acquaintance, c'mon
>>27359072
Yeah, that's a hint. Next time you're alone with her tell her that you like her.
Then stick your dick in her.
But seriously, go for it. I've gotten hints similar before. Always meant she liked me.
Ask a college dropout, minimum wage slave factory worker anything
I don't need to, because I know all the answers from personal experience.
>>27359064
Hello fellow working man.
How are you? Have you turned your life around? Are you still in the same place? I don't think i can take this much longer friend
you probably don't get much appreciation for your job, so I, your resident NEET, just want to thank you for your hard work that makes my lifestyle possible.
Anyone else feel like they're wasted potential?
I feel like I could've been great if I applied myself but after several years of deciding to do nothing I can no longer see myself doing anything but nothing.
>>27359008
Today is as good as any to start. I believe in you even if you don't believe in yourself. I love you man.
If a girl had gone out with me for some reason she'd have fixed my life and I'd have a bright future. But my intelligence is wasted in doing drugs to forget that girls don't like me.
I still hope some miracle will happen and I'll meet the right girl. It's still not too late to have a bright future, but I'm running out of time.
>>27359008
>Anyone else feel like they're wasted potential?
Sure - I wish some vidya studio would hire me to make their music instead of just making music for myself. I know I've got the skills but I don't know how to get that initial push.
All i want is someone to guide me on what i should do with my life
go to community college or join the military
I understand that feel. I thought about joining the military but once you're in you can't get out until your contract is up and that big commitment terrifies me.
>>27358821
Become a transsexual prostitute and give aids to many normies.
is waifuism healthy
No, but it's healthier than oneitis and beta orbiting.
Who's this
I see her all over pol
>>27358903
anzujaamu, the world's most beautiful cockroach
Does anyone feel like their natural purpose has been prevented by modern life?
I feel like I should be wandering the Earth surviving by doing odds jobs and never settling down.
The modern world prevents this lifestyle almost entirely. Why couldn't I be a wandering samurai or something?
Surviving hand to mouth on foot across the country isn't as kawaii as animu presents it.
I feel like this everyday.
But thanks to the white man and his brutal colonization of the earth we are damned to cold hard and purposeless existence.
I'm a warrior-poet in a society that abhors both violence and art while simultaneously worshiping the idea of violence and art. It's a complicated feel.*tips katana*
My benis swells up when my gf touches it. Am I allergic to her?
>>27358394
My ass swells up when my bf fucks it, am I allergic to him?
>>27358394
>>27358573
Animal reaction images are more cancerous than any Pepe meme. Truth.
>>27358590
#letruthXD
If you went to a different dimension and found that your other self had a better life waifu,money,etc would you kill him and take his place? Wat do anon?
Nah
I'd show up uninvited and create a twilight zone mindfuck for all people involved
I'd try to get to know this other me better
I'd probably take myself as my waifu, desu
I just ask him if I can fuck his wife every now and again I'm sure he'll oblige
Better man then me anon, I'd do it no question if I could. Wonder what our feel anons say?
>Implying you wouldn't want this to happen to you
>>27358320
Those fan fictions are always shitty. Also the fount / color background is terrible for reading.
I would fap to proper porn / doujins about the subject if they had a decent story though.
>>27358367
>doujins
Honestly doujins are a billion times more fucked up than these regular english tg captions are. After I finally got into sad panda I stopped browsing there after two days when I kept on inadvertently coming across extremely depraved shit without even looking for it e.g. what I thought was a regular 'waking up as a girl' erotic story turned into the main character having a monster vagina that looked like it was filled with colon polyps and was loose enough to stretch out over his school bully's entire body so he/she could then digest him through his/her monster vagina.
>>27358320
Nah, sign me up for the diapers and sissyfication
>you were never /ss/'d by a female pedophile
>>27358266
Truly the most abstract of feels....
>tfw I was
I have fantasies of being kidnapped and molested. Usually I imagine I'm 14ish for them. I used to imagine it was men doing it, but now that I'm older I usually imagine nonhuman monsters.
>tfw no gf
>tfw no friends
Which is worse? I honestly resolved to my eternal KV fate long time ago, but having no friends really bums me out
friends will always be there normally
gf cheat and generally act like women
i think no gf is worse.
At least without friends you can talk to anons on the chans
but you can't fuck people over the internet, or love someone you've never even met, and could be a 40 year old man.
No gf is much worse.
It's just my opinion. Maybe it depends on the person. Friends are just a mean to get a gf. Having gf and no friends is the best lifestyle, while having friends and no gf is the worst.
Any biofags want to explain a few things to a physicist ?
1. How do pinecones distrubute their seeds to grow? I dont see how they would penetrate the ground outside of some sort of eroding effect. Droppings wouldnt cut it.
2. How do trees regrow their leaves? Are there residual buds left over that are activated by a specific amount of lumens?
3. Where do all of the fallen leaves go, assuming an unassisted process by humanity such as compost and animal feed?
4. Have there been any seasonal deprivation experiments on trees that you can link me to that show tree behavior when deprived of sunlight (but supplied with all other variables) after winter ends?
1 meh
2 how?
3 leaves rot and turn into earth
4 in summer trees can have water problems which gives a cracked texture on trunk
Meh
>>27357717
>How do pinecones distrubute their seeds to grow?
when its hot they open up and the seeds fall on the ground :)
>>27357717
1. When a pine cone reaches maturity in the fall it splits open and attached to the seed is a wing shaped thing that helps it get far away from its parent. Squirrels or whatever bury them for later and forget about some and they come up next year. Or they just land somewhere getting covered by leaves and other debris and then sprouting following spring.
2. Deciduous and coniferous plants form buds over the growing season which lye dormant over the winter or dry season. In tropical climates with year round rainfall, plants just continue growing and producing new leaves.
3. Fallen leaves land on the ground where mold, worms, bacteria and the elements break down to leaves into smaller matter which eventually becomes soil.
4. I don't know of any but a tree has usually enough stored energy to survive one growing season without adequate sunlight. It will still begin to bud if the temperature is warm enough. Plants cannot absorbed nutrients without photosynthesis to go with it for long. Leaves will turn white when not exposed to sunlight at all and die.It may go into a dormant state for up to 3 years depending on the species. The tree will slow down its cellular functions to conserve energy. If these conditions last for too long, the tree will eventually run out of stored energy and die.
Who /dumb/ here?
>have trouble adding two digit numbers in my head
>thought that "north" and "up" were the same thing until my late teens
>always get the a/e wrong in desperate and separate (without looking it up, which I did)
>keep looking up the definition for "catch 22" and re-reading it, but I never quite understand what it means or how to use it in a sentence
>sometimes look the wrong way when I cross roads
>>27357647
>separate
hahaha dumb nigger it's seperate
>>27357647
>>sometimes look the wrong way when I cross roads
>implying you're not doing that subconsciously because you wanna get hit by car
>>27357705
No, separate is the adjective and seperate is the verb
Bitch
