Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 169. page
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>Walk into a herd of Normies grazing on the electric jew
>Take out my Cellphone Jammer and turn it on
>They all go into a blind panic, some normies break down and curl up in the fetal position
>Get my cum IEDs made from 6 months of stored up cum and throw them into the mass of frenzied normies
>Take out my modified super soaker and blast piss in the stacey's face
>Alpha of the Chad Pack notices me and charges to me
>Detonate my Improvised Cum Devices
>They start gagging and barfing
who here /betauprising/?
>normies see explosion of cum IED
>Run opposite way
>"dumb normalfags"
>Poo-poo sentry arises from cover
>Normies stop
>spin on feet
>can't escape
>poo-poo 10mm bullets splatter on CHADS body
>get killstreak
>pee-pee jet sprays and kills remaining normies
>walk into local pet store
>go up to the parrots when no one is looking
>train them to say "normies out"
>go outside and attract pigeons with birdseed
>make sure to place the food over pictures of Chads and Stacies along with snippets of their hair
>spray myself with Chad cologne and harass clothes while wearing a mask plus a polo and chinos
Soon my avian brethren will rise against them
>>29951266
harass crows*
Diagnose me /r9k/.
Psychologist are useless and /b/ros are too retarded.
>>29951105
I believe you're gay
that'll be 9 dollars plus tip
>>29951141
Fuck off.
And no you won't get any tip.
>>29951105
you're probably sad like everyone here
>wagie neighbour's loli daughter is addicted to pokemon go like every normie fuck
>place lure pokemons into the woods
>catch her
>rape, mutilate, kill her
>rape her corpse
>next day normie neighbour rings at my door and asks if I saw his daughter somewhere
>tell him no
>>29951098
>>place lure pokemons into the woods
I don't think that's how lures work? My wife told me they had to be dropped near gyms or pokestops or something.
>>29951098
Thisis an evil plan or story.
>>29951130
>wife
NORMIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>it's another "anon blames all his problems on the Chad boogeyman" thread
>>29951088
But anon, we don't blame our problems on chad, chad is a manifestation of someone who won the genetic lottery, how would it make sense to blame chad for being lucky?
I blame the jews desu.
Not original?
>tfw no jewish gf
>>29951088
I blame my mother for not swallowing me
Who /underweight/ here?
Yesterday I weighed myself and I am 43kg, and I'm not even anorexic or bolemic.
>>29951050
i'm 60 kg and 1,88 meters tall so a little underweight but not that much.
How tall are you, OP?
Last time I weighed myself I was42kg at 5'11
The skelly meme is real?
>mfw people taking their egos seriously
You do realize you came OUT OF the Earth (and the universe), not into it, right?
A giant fucking crane didn't just drop you on this planet, dumbnuts.
Who in the hell do you think you are? This is all just roleplay, the universe is a stage and its actors are (necessarily and inevitably) itself.
DUDE, PSYCHEDELlCS. LMAO
I hate this non-sequitur. I may be part of the universe but I am myself first. Fuck you.
>>29951040
everyone has an ego and you cannot permanently get rid of it the people that say they did are lying you can only temporarily lose your ego. your ego is who you identify yourself as with this universe . it can change all the time and feel different all the time. or it can stay the same your whole life kind of like the assholes you are talking about. that can be a good thing or bad thing. they don't have to be assholes but they usually are because their friends and who they think they are keep them feeling like they are someone famous but they are really an asshole.
Who here /shittyjob/?
>have to clean up piss and shit for 8 hours
>the only male amongst a sea of slutty, noisy black women who constantly talk about themselves or each other
>the AC is broken so when I sweat it's always dripping everywhere
It's literally this or being a NEET
>>29950971
have a (you) out of pity
>Merchandiser for big box stores
>Assign me the rich neighborhoods
>have to see rich looking teens & young adults having the time of their lives while I work
>>29951201
T-thanks anon. Are you a NEET?
This board is pretty dead these days.
What happened?
>>29950940
maybe the normies all left to play pokemon go
I kept btfoing normies with my truthbombs
Normies/reddit/fake suicide threads
>mfw a cute stoner girl I know wants to make pot brownies for me
That's nice man
I'm jealous
shes gonna put laxatives in them and fuck chad while youre crying on the toilet
>>29950947
>m-m-muh chad boogeyman
Let's look at this video of Elliot's
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIwOKHZ_Bkc
In it, we know that he is driving on South Fairview avenue, a road he has been seen driving on multiple times to go to Goleta Beach park.
In this specific video he is driving away from Goleta Beach Park. A video filmed in early may, although he took it down for a couple of weeks after the police incident.
On may 6th the police report stated that he got into an argument in Goleta Beach Park, insulted an Asian male, and called his girlfriend a 'horse faced slut', after this he drove away and they reported it to the police.
It is very likely that this video was filmed in the immediate aftermath of the incident, and would explain his confident and happy attitude
If he drives on that road regularly then that decreases the chance of what you're supposing.
>>29950897
>On may 6th the police report stated that he got into an argument in Goleta Beach Park, insulted an Asian male, and called his girlfriend a 'horse faced slut'
sauce?
>>29950965
I forgot to add, the incident where he had the argument occurred at 1930, and this video clearly shows that it is evening, increasing the chance
Are you a good liar? How important do you believe lying is to succeeding in life?
pretty damn important. And I suck at lying. When I do, I could just hear it in the tone when the person responds that I'm lying too.
>suck at lying
>never lie because of that
>people think I'm ''honest'' for the sake of it
FUCK OFF
>>29950896
>Are you a good liar?
No. I wouldn't even try. Even the white lies that are expected don't go so smoothly. I do am honest though, I don't lie by omission either.
>How important do you believe lying is to succeeding in life?
I think it is. But it's subtle I guess. Not outright lies. Just slight manipulations.
Here's a list of things I find wrong with her:
1. Shitty responses most of the time. I try to spark more interesting replies but it doesn't work
2. You can't get anywhere with her
3. You can't get anything from her
4. Randomly stops replying despite saying "talk to me more :^("
5. Never replies later
6.Tosses the convo over to me in every situation
7. Shortest replies in the universe
8. Is vehement with her beliefs against you despite what you tell her
She can be quite a nice chat sometimes and I can get past most of this stuff but it gets annoying. 2 and 3 and the biggest ones for Me.
At the beginning, she was all "text me, talk to me" and sending me 5 messages if I didn't reply in 10 minutes. Now she's all "ok now that I have you in my grasp, time to treat you like shit". Over exaggerating but you get the point. If I stop texting her for a year, she won't send me shit despite saying "oh I love you so much" and shit. 2nd time this has happened over a 7 month hiatus.
For #5, I mean that sometimes people can't reply at that time so they reply at a later time. for instance, you awake in the middle of the night, look at your phone, and open a message. Realizing how tired you are, you choose to reply at a later time.
>not my gf
>just a girl
Same thing with me, she asked for my number but then texted me for like 5 seconds and that was it. If I don't text her, she would never text me back. I wish I was more interesting because I feel like I'm annoying her.
>>29951679
She texted me for a few days, texting me first and all, then it was my turn to do everything otherwise we wouldn't talk.
This used to me, I would get so happy when she could be bothered to reply. The best way to get anything from her was to bully and criticise her.
But I would always apologise. Guys these girls know you fancy them. they know have power over you. Once they know it its all over... It's literally just a game to them.
My current gf actually banned (lol) me from talking to her because she says she's toxic and no good.
Fucked up thing is she knows this and sends me cute picture on snapchat and speaks to me. When she knows I have a over protective gf. Of course I fucking break and start falling for her. Soon as I expressed feelings she walled me off
It feels like when you just let go of your dick after you cum.
I feel nothing anymore.
Everything is just boring.
Tell me i'm not alone.
In feeling this way.
It's called anhedonia. You are not alone anon :(
>>29951056
how do we fix this feel? or lack thereof
once you get so depressed or have all lose of motivation ur brain is like fuck this shit im just going to not care either.
>I don't want to suck this cock...I don't want to suck this cock...I don't want to suck this cock...
>I don't want to be fucked by this cock...I don't want to be fucked by this cock...I don't want to be fucked by this cock...
>>29950722
A-are you sure, OP?
>>29950809
I think i'm sure...
>>29950821
You have to be completely sure.
I have 600 dollars what should i spend it on
A PS4 and Bloodborne
>>29950717
i already have a ps4 and bloodborne is for faggots
>>29950735
buy the most expensive dragon dildo queerbreath
