Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5952. page
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my best friend bet me $10,000 that i can't eat 5 lbs of cooked shit!!! this is going to be the easiest $10,000 i have ever made!
here's how it's going to work:
the shit will be my own shit, for obvious concerns over infection, etc. I figure it will take about 3 shits to get 5 lbs. I will shit these out into a shoe box and put them in the freezer, killing all the bacteria. Once I've made weight, I will give the box to my friend, a culinary student, and he will thaw it, add some spices and seasonings to make it taste a little better, and put it all in a big casserole dish and bake it, again killing any remaining bacteria.
Once it's done, I will have to eat the first serving while it is still hot. After that I have 4 days to finish the dish, eating it as one would leftovers. If I can do it, my friend will give me $2000 up front, and then $500 a month for 16 months, totalling $10,000. If I can't do it, then I will have to pay the same to him.
Now all I have to do is wait to shit out 5 lbs worth of feces, and this show will be on the road.
I figure it can't be all that hard to do. Look at all the scat porn out there. Plus this is cooked and seasoned shit, so it'll taste even better and be completely safe.
Fuck Anon you got balls. Go get that $10,000 baby.
Pls post pics
Origeonally cummento
>>25842027
>people who want a vegan pet should consider guinea pigs
Fuggn kekd desu
>Walking down the street.
>Chad looking guy is walking towards me.
>He smiles at me and offers a timid 'hello'.
>Smile back and give him a small nod.
>Part ways.
>Jokes on him, I was really demonstrating the ancient hate-nod of Babylon, and I was actually wishing death on his family.
Stupid fucking Chads don't even know about the hate-nod.
Wtf is the hate-nod of Babylon?
I'm from Babylon and I've never heard of it but maybe you can teach me?
>>25841614
the teachings of the hate-nod have been passed down to me by my father, and his father before him and so on.
>Qt 7/10 girl smiles at me shyly
>I ignore her and look blankly elsewhere
Lol fucking stupid roastie BTFO.
>tfw wife is spending the night at her sexual needs boyfriend
I hear you anon.
I just get sex. She never wants to talk about her day or compare me to Winnie the Pooh. ;_;
She saves that for Emotional Needs Boyfriend
T_T
>>25840933
How is your wife's son doing?
>>25840933
iktf OP i have to take care of my wifes son in the cuckshed while they use the house. Its been 2 weeks already.
At least she chose me as her husband
>nonwhites are allowed to post on /r9k/
Why don't you darkies just take a hike
>>25840924
They don't do outdoor activities, besides sitting on the porch
Whites literally,L I T E R A L L Ycannot be robots. Fuck off to normiebook.
>>25840944
That's a lie. We play basketball at the neighborhood bball court too!
Special MLK day thread. What's ailin' ya, robots? Go ahead, I'm not the normal bartender, but I'm here. Grab a drink and sit down.
It's been a long night of shit posting
definitely need to wash it back with something
any recommendations based bartender?
I fucking wish I could get a drink but mom's not home yet so can't borrow money
>>25840762
>MLK day thread
I want the Jews to leave
What is some good dumbbell program I can do at home?
I want to lose weight, get fit and strong.
Get a barbell.
>>25840649
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKbgw2aK_eU
There ya go :^)
>>25840649
Fuck off you wannabe normie, this isn't /fit/.
Some people say that our time will come when women have past their prime, but I'm really worrying that this won't be true when you've actually gotten that old.
Let's say for an example
>Woman is in her 30's
>She's past her prime
>Get to choose between two men
>One is pretty unattractive, but has an amazing personality and a great job
>The other is really attractive, but has nothing going on for him other than his looks
How is it, which one would she actually choose?
>>25840528
she doesn't choose, she gets no one.
What about a good looking guy who doesn't act like a cocksucker, is that still a chad?
you're gonna end up old and ugly and nobody will want you. you will end up working at the grocery store or at potbelly working odd hours, and fucking up the simplest shit and drive customers away with your incompetence. you were so used to having someone take care of you but your last guy of 4-5 years said fuck this im out and now u are fending for yourself and suck at it.
would /r9k/ date a girl with large mammaries?
Would one date me?
>>25840506
post big mammaries please, and preferably naked.
>Huge tits
Next you'll tell me she's kind and loving and sucks a mean dick. No thanks, I'll take an insecure control freak hag that doesn't put out because I hate myself and don't think I can do any better.
Oh my gosh, I know just how you feel, anon!
I've been depressed too! When Chad broke up with me, I was depressed for almost two weeks. I didn't leave the house and I barely even texted my friends! It was not fun. But you'll get through it!
Thanks, Stacy.
Two checks, please.
Are you gonna finish that frozen yogurt?
everyone is allowed to have problems, stop getting salty because someone else's problems are "less severe" than yours
depression isn't a fucking competition
>The officer involved shooting happened just after 6pm at the fast food restaurant located the intersection of Grand Boulevard and Gravois Avenue. According to authorities ,the sergeant saw the suspect inside the resturant as he approached the door and ordered the suspect to drop his weapon. Police say the suspect refused and that's when the Sergeant opened fire, killing the suspect.
http://fox2now.com/2016/01/17/report-officers-shoot-and-kill-armed-suspect-after-report-of-robbery/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHTgS2ZNf4E
HE DINDDU NUFFIN
DAYTS RACIS!
>>25840450
CHIMMPOUT
CHIMP
OUT
>>25840495
he a good boy he dinddu nuffin
he wouldnt harm a soul he a good boy
he studied so hard for his high school diploma!
he just shot my baby cos he's black!
I'll start
>Engelbert Humperdinck
>tfw have a shitty, artsy, special snowflake girly name while i'm a bitter misanthropic metalhead
I'm going to murder my parents one day, just wait.
>>25840423
just change your name fag
>>25840361
>God tier names
Benedict Cumberbatch
What are you going to do besides complain about how your still a virgin today?
Celebrate the nigger.
gonna eat some candy
>tfw not a virgin since 2013
:^)
I love the "smart but underachieving" meme. Do you think life is some kind of anime where suddenly someone in a suit will magically appear in your house and say: "oh yes I can see how great you really are and how everyone else judged you wrong. Here,Im going to make you a multimillionaire and the most important person in the world"
Yeah keep going like that,Im sure everything will be changed in your own favor anytime soon.
no, i dont even watch anime
i'm coming to the realization that i will most likely live a mediocre life, and be much less prosperous than my parents are.
>>25840145
>I'm coming to the realization
Buddy at this pace you will be lucky to be mediocre and not just the bottom of the barrel wich seems to be your destiny
>>25840120
Thisman is an imposter. I would never talk ill about my NEET bretheran who browse this board. I brought you guys a panko shrimp as compensation.
I got you guys a present, get out your dicks.
>>25840063
and the gripping story continues
>>25840069
and it keeps on coming
>>25840077
four/eighteen
The progress of the beta male:
>likes girls
>can't get girls
>hates girls
>avoids girls
>eventually wants to become a girl
Do you see what happens when you fap your hormones away?
for me it was
>likes girls
>can't get girls
>hates girls
>avoids girls
>like boys
>can't get boys
>hate boys
I can't not see suicide in my future
>>25840162
I went
>likes girls
>can't get girls
>hates girls
>avoids girls
>like boys
>can't get boys
but I could never hate boys
Me
>avoid girls
>like girls
>get girls
>dislike girls
>keep getting girls
>hate girls
>cant stop wanting to put penis on vagina
>get girl
>despise girls
