Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2438. page
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This guy conquered Constantinople at age 21.
What have you achieved at that age?
not being a sandnigger
>>28836797
But he had an entire empire at his fingertips.
>>28836815
>/pol/ in a nutshell
so great
Want to know what it psychologically feels like to have sex?
1. Put on some porn of your choice
2. Do a half squat and hold it
3. Roll a sock into a ring on your weewee and start pulling - has to be so the we wee and hand are not able to feel each other
It really works & tricks your brain into thinking you've had sex!!! Should feel a fairly trippy sensation afterwards
>>28836749
Lol, why is the half squat necessary?
And how are we supposed to pull on the sock without it slipping off your pennis?
>>28836749
Basically you're saying a sock feels like a vagina. I know what you mean, when you wrap your dick with a towel or blanket and jack off that way, your body cums like its actually cumming into something, not just cumming, but nonetheless it still doesn't feel as good as a vagina
t. robot who has had sex
>>28836817
You put the first part of it on then fold it up continuously like this. For me it stays on by itself but you might have to hold it on.
I'm not sure why but the half-squat is a key ingredient. My theory is the slight strain on the thighs mimics half the pleasure of plunging a poocy
It's not 100% obviously but it's much closer than normal jerking it
Anybody else here really fucking intuitive when it comes to reading body language, people and social situations, except for when it relates to them specifically?
It's really easy for me to read other people's body language, I can normally work out who's in what mood, who's going to end up hooking up with whom way before it even happens, who's hiding something or has had a bad day at work, etc. When it comes to girls supposedly flirting with me though, or having any kind of control over my own body language and how I come across, I am FULL 110% autism. It's like I have this superpower but no way of using it, the social analysis skills of a high-functioning sociopath but none of the charm or the ability to use that knowledge for my own personal gain.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
>>28836747
fairly sure this is an anxiety thing
I have a similar thing, sometimes even lose the ability to understand language when people talk to me, hear random syllables instead
>>28836747
Oh that just means you are autistic and lack social skills. You think you are reading people but they never tell you you're wrong because you just stare like a creep
this board is like going to the zoo except with autism instead of animals
Reminder that ALL women like muscular guys (although facial attractiveness is extremely important as well).
Those who say they don't are simply intimidated by them, and usually say shit like "He wouldn't want me anyway"
thankfully im gay
like most muscular guys
>>28836705
Not only this, but confidence. I found after lifting for a while my confidence went up as my body started looking better and better.
>>28836763
Do you know ASM, senpai?
Kill yourself you degenerate shitlord.
>>28836694
Why do trans dicks look so soft and fragile? Just look at this thing, it's not even gay to touch it either since it looks girly.
>>28836721
I agree the dick is different, much more feminine, I think it's the hormones
>>28836721
>>28836775
It's because the hormones turning them into a vagina.
What have your experiences with black people been like as a robot?
>>28836570
we had like 20-30 nigs at our school.
Literally half of them got arrested at some point
>>28836570
>go to university
>make friends with Nigerian exchange student
>hang at university a few times
>go topartyin second year
>basically only human interaction i had at party was talking about mad max with nigeria bro
>>28836570
>got mugged by a nigger when I visited Dallas last year
What the fuck do you think? Niggers will be the first to hang on the day of the war.
KILL NIGGERS RACE WAR NOW
>bubbly personality
>Gamer girl
>>28836567
>Work: Boss at the Krusty Krab
>Education: Escuela de la Vida
>Education: Hogwarts
>tfw you post stupid shit with your trip on
I don't use a trip. Ever.
And yes, I know this is bait, but it's a boring day for me, and taking this bait will pass some time.
>>28836520
No anon i forgot to take my trip off and posted something stupid.
>>28836538
Tripcodes in general are bait.
Hey /r9k/ I'm back. The manlet with a foot taller wife. So I've had a discussion with my wife about my little problem. The issues with her going out for drinks late, her not letting me go out on my own, the lack of sex with me and her. She admitted that she loves me but she simply doesn't see me as a "grown man". That fucking hurts. It hurts that she admitted her exes who were bigger then me were better at sex. She admitted sex isn't everything in a relationship but she does need satisfaction. She has "needs". I understand but so do I.
We had a long talk about why she doesn't listen to my opinion or take me seriously. Why she values other men's views over my own. Why she constantly flirts with other men in front of me and why she points out hot studs to me.
She gets turned on by imagining me as the bottom in a gay experience. That's why she bites her lip and stays out of it when her co worker teases me or pushes me around. That's why she likes it when men flirt with her in front of me. She likes the idea of me being dominated.
I thought I would have a normal married life but now it seems as if the only way to be happy together is to let her tease me.
It's weird because she treats me like a little boy but she always teases me about the men at work who look at her ass, how she will do things like cross her legs in front of them to provoke a reaction, casual touching at after work drinks. She gets off on the attention they give her and it seems she gets off my basically telling me I'm not man like them... I'm just a little boy.
She says she hasn't cheated. She just likes the attention and then she plays with herself while she tells me about it. She also enjoys telling me what to do, which is why she likes that I'm a house husband. It's another aspect f her being the "one wearing the pants".
I'm so fucking bored being home alone and its driving me crazy imagining her with these goddamn drooling co workers. If she wants attention I'll put pictures of her on here.
wear her heels
>>28836408
if she's doing this to you, why won't just leave her? Of course she's cheated on you.
Anyone else a kissless virgin but still REALLY pissed off by 90% of the people on this board?
I've lost count of how many times I've read a story of some retard who never washes himself and wonders why girls don't like him, or some dipshit who doesn't know how to tone down his autism in public situations and wonders why this puts off every girl he meets.
I'm sick of these clueless filthy robots. I'm sitting over here with impeccable hygiene, a good dress sense, a healthy social life, and the knowledge of how and when to adapt my personality to each social situation. And I'm STILL a kissless virgin.
You fuckers don't know half of my pain. I bet a good deal of people here would lose their kissless virginity within weeks if they just took a fucking shower and stopped rambling about anime and video games in front of normies. You don't actually know how it feels to put MASSIVE EFFORT in and still receive NOTHING.
>>28836403
Even worse are robots who are openly racist and misogynistic and wonder why they're social pariahs
Like for fucks sake
I get annoyed by racist women hating degenerates who think they're some kind of superior being, just because someone the same color skin as them did something important but they're worthless ass is sat behind a computer stinking of cum and doritos and obesity.
I might be a virgin but I'm not a shit person, some of these people deserve to be virgins, it makes me sad that I am in the same sinking boat as these assholes.
I feel the exact same way OP.
>mom walks in
>walks out and leaves the door open
Why do normies do that? Do they have no sense of privacy?
>>28836396
Is your mom mine?
>>28836396
normies usually leave parents' house
>>28836396
It's just discourteous of it. I'm sure they probably close the door most of the time when they want to be alone. Parents tend to be curious and overly familiar about their kid's lives and environment, and as such sometimes fail to respect the sense of privacy that they and everyone really should be allowed.
>Dat boi who would sit alone in science class and not talk to anybody
>sitting in science class 8th grade
>no idea how to flirt with girl I like that sits in front of me
>she's obsessed with a famous musician pretty boy who has a solo career after boyband died out
>write his name SUX all over my book
>show it to her
>she flips out tries taking my book
>fight over book half heatedly trying not to laugh
>she's totally losing her shit gets the book
>tries erasing what I wrote all over the page
>teacher is like what the fuck is going on? trying to teach a class here.
>innocent.jpg
>no idea she's a crazy person took my book
>she tries explaining and gets scolded
>has to give back book
>start writing musician sucks in big blocky letters and show it to her again
>>28836685
>see her working years later
>all grown up now, at the store with my mom
>shes hot but im just going to pretend I don't recognize her
>i'll just shop here again later when my moms not around
>see photo of girl on internet
>tits
>no fucking way!?
>it's from a few years before
>second photo
>shes covered in jizz
>poster says shes a whore and women are trash
>stop going to that shop to buy shit i dont need
Would of just been weird to keep doing that anyway.
>>28836732
You cant just say this shit without giving link to the photos you know?
Why don't chinese girls like black men?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xq-I0JRhvt4
>>28836281
stupid anti-racemixing propaganda
america should invade and give china some freedom
>>28836281
the same reason every escort online doesn't accept african americans.
>>28836281
no girl does. it's just an idea spread by roasties and landwhales because only nignogs have standards low enough to go after them.
Pls take me in, I will do anything you say. I love you.
>tfw no gril will ever beg for me
>>28836301
omg, samson, PLEASE be my bf!! i love trains too
we can go trainwatching!!!!!
>>28836367
I seriously doubt your sincerity, but thank you
Hello, dear robots. I have so much to tell.First of all im 24 years old. I just dont have with who else to talk about it. I have so much problems bothering me. Mental problems. I dont even know how it all started, i remember i was so happy kid in my childhood without any problems. But everything changed when i hit puberty. I was world of warcraft no lifer all the time. I was playing since 2008 until 2016. I stoped playing it couple of months back. I just dont feel fun any more while playing it. When i was young WoW was such a comfy game. In that game i was someone that i couldnt become in reality (not physicaly). In WoW i was strong, confident, communicable. In that game i made so many virtual friends. In my skype is 90% people is from world of warcraft. While i was in school 1-10 grade i had many friends irl, i knew everyone in my school and i was friend almost with everyone. But everything, my whole life, my whole understanding changed in high school....
In high school i was around people that i dont know. I was shy and never talked to them( i always was shy, but most of my friends was from childhood). After couple of weeks they started caling me names, they find out im virgin, they was laughting at me everyday for that. When they bullied me that effected me a lot, but when they find out that im virgin, i thougth i will freak out. Every time someone called me virgin i felt dizzy inside my head. I couldnt understand a shit what was going around me at that time. I though that was a nightmare, i just couldnt accept that was reality. Any way, after 1 year i changed school wich had good name, there was tolerante people, but still i didnt made a single friend. If i was going at first to school with better name, i could find some friends. But that bullying in shitty school destroyed me. I never imagined that could happen to me. Since that time im so much more closed person and i need much moret time to get along with someone than i needed in childhood. 1/2or3
>>28836262
you sound stupid
original
Cool story bro.
Big fucking deal, you have depression crawling in your skin and wounds that will never heal, now just put on a brave face and worship Pepe.
>>28836262
WoW destroys another youth. When will Blizzard pay for their crime of destroying an entire generation?
