Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4053. page
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>tfw no average gf to take out this weekend
that's okay, I'm used to not talking to anyone all weekend
None of those women will take you over Chad's dick. I don't know why you even care about it. I stopped caring long ago.
It's like you would be poor and crying "tfw no yacht to sail to my private island for the weekend".
Some of us are simply not born to be with women, aka 80% of me. Just like 99% won't have a yacht to sail to private island.
>>27715398
80% of men is like 2.8 billion people.
>passing a kidney stone
>just entered my urethra
>the pain meds have worn off
just end my life senpai
>>27715315
Now that it's in your urethra, it should be pretty easy to cut out with a knife.
>>27715315
I had bladder stones, I don't know what the kidney tube part of the experience is like but I know that you should drink a lot of water
That sounds incredibly painful. Why don't you go to the ER?
>Honestly feel like something awful is about to happen
What the fuck is this called? I can never relax because of it.
You know that I'm coming for you...
paranoia
sounds like your schizo
dread
origami comment
You are all my puppets...
What u wan me do massa
>>27715308
Let me see ur fat dick, master
Ur a fag and shouuld kys
Why haven't you ended it yet, robots?
>>27715254
I'm running on memes and moxie at this point.
>>27715254
My mom said she would kill herself if I killed myself and I have enough for my existence already.
>>27715254
>bought 3 litres of vodka about a month ago
>whenever i get to the last bottle, drunk me buys some more online
>always in vodka, always drunk
drunk me is keeping me alive. personally i think he's got a problem.
1. How do I pay the price of birth?
2. When do my achievements become my own and are not a product of my upbringing, genetics and luck?
3.How do I change the past so I can focus on the future?
4.How do you get a friend when people judge you?
5.How to take money from family without being judged by others?
6.How to not get judged by others, when they have limited amount of information regarding you?
Need normies for answers, since you know all of them.
>>27715253
You think too much. Go with the flow, man. Gnarly wave comin' up!
>>27715621
That's not an answer. I except normies to know the answers since they are all knowledgeable.
>>27715253
>How do I pay the price of birth?
That's just poetry
>When do my achievements become my own and are not a product of my upbringing, genetics and luck?
You'll know
>How do I change the past so I can focus on the future?
It's retarded to even contemplate that
>How do you get a friend when people judge you
Wut
>etc.
Come on anon, grow some balls. How to not get judged by others? Seriously? Move to the desert, cause it's not going to happen.
ITT: Fictional characters who are or likely became robots.
The scene where he kicks Phoebus out of the church could be muted, dubbed with
>NORMIES GET OUT REEEEEEE
and it would fit perfectly.
Robert from shark tank is a robot for sure.
I would say this guy. But he had a girlfriend.
Why are we not raiding the girl chan lolcowDOTfarm all the time? Fuck those bitches. Also I guess maybe we could snag some gfs as spoils of war
I don't really see a reason why. They're just living their lives, having fun catfighting and shit. They're just keeping to themselves and didn't really do much of anything to deserve it.
Because you don't go to a wasp nest and knock it down if you want some honey.
>>27715268
NO DUDE THEY ARE BITCHES B-I-T-C-H-E-S. Plus I thought we hated all women?
>>27715273
It's not like they are gonna know who each one of us individually is. After you're done raiding you can act like you are an innocent passerby just lookin for some brain
Is drinking cough syrup/extracting it to get dxm worth it? I've hear its something like 12 he trip and heard good things. Wondering what a robots perspective is on it
>>27715230
*12 hr trip
>>27715230
Also what are some other easy to acquire drugs that are worth trying?
>>27715551
The fucking internet. It's 2016.
and yeah chugging cough syrup is cool if you're new to drugs, so go for it. I can't do it anymore, have done it too much I think and can't stop myself from throwing up even after a few sips of the syrup or a few gels down my throat.
do girls like bearded guys or clean shaven guys more?
pic unrelated
I am a girl and I prefer clean shaven but there's this whole beard meme going on.
>>27715248
i feel like i look too young without the beard, but too scraggly with it
i'm always conflicted after i shave
>>27715222
I have a beard because my cheekbones look disproportionately wide without it, or at least I am paranoid that they will seem that way.
>Mom found the gay porn stash
>implying it's gay
>>27715218
>mom found the feelgood cucumber
>>27715218
post updates
Paper scissors rock? Pin the tail on the donkey? Duck duck goose? Tag?
Why do nigger pubes look like beehives?
To warn you the STDs might sting?
>>27715165
I'd pay money to watch my sister suck this.
now thats a bbc
>Don't worry, Anon. When you grow up, those mean bullies will get their comeuppance!
You lied to me, mom.
You have to give it to them. Make them pay.
>>27715154
Does people seriously bully you at your age?
>"Don't worry about people like that. His life will peak at high school. You've got your whole life ahead of you."
>mfw he's partying and having sex at a university that his parents paid full tuition for and I'm washing dishes to pay for my shitty state school tuition for a major I don't care about
My friend that I've had since grade school just invited me to some party he's throwing before leaving the state
I feel obliged to go because we were besties all of our life until high school
I know if I go I'll be around a load of people I don't want to be around and I doubt he'll hang around me
If I don't go it be a huge slap in his face and I'd look like a giant tool
I don't know if he knows how humiliated I'd be if I attended a social event
Maybe you can meet up with him afterwards or beforehand and say good bye personally?
>>27715090
Just go and embrace the discomfort.
You're a normalfag, I don't care.
I hope your friend gets cancer in his brain and dies.
I forgot to lock the store's safe after leaving work for the night. Impossible to get in now. what to do?
>>27715087
How long ago did you close? Is it considered a big enough emergency to contact someone who can get in to take care of it?
You could also just call early before they open. Honesty looks better than cluelessness.
Be there with the opening crew first thing tomorrow morning.
Try and avoid telling them exactly why you're there if you can, but don't lie. Be vague if necessary. Be honest if pressed.
>>27715087
What u care? It's Shekelstein's money.
