Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5187. page
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American robots, you have 10 seconds to explain why you're not voting for this man.
Because he is a virgin.
Fuck off robot.
>>26655765
Because I think he might die in the next year.
>>26655765
As a principled libertarian, I will never vote for this economically illiterate big government socialist.
Where were you when Darwinfags got btfo?
Are you stupid OP ? There are not any of the first monkey-kind left. Today's monkeys are other evolutions of this one
Still waiting for us to get BTFO.
>>26655759
Good point OP.
CHECKMATE ATHEIST!!!!
Why is dating so bullshit?
It's like a really intricate dance where one wrong move can completely turn a girl off. The problem is that the rules are not implicitly written anywhere.
You can't be too available. Once you get her number, you hardly ever text her. You can't instantly reply to her otherwise you'll come off too needy, so you have to wait to text her back. Sometimes you even gotta wait days and pretend like you're busy.
Actually getting together with the girl and going on dates isn't the problem with me, I can carry conversations and have fun with it. It's just all the mandatory games that really irk me.
I can get to a first date about 20% of the time once we can hold regular conversations with each other. I think I've had a second date three times and never a third date. I'm either going after women who are too attractive, women who only want free dinners, or women who are kinda involved with another guy and are deciding between me and him. Or I'm just so socially inept that I can't carry relationships or I have whatever emotional disorder prevents people from maintaining relationships with other people. I am shit. Women are shit. This world is shit
>>26656431
>I can get to a first date about 20% of the time
I'm confused.
Don't you WANT help or feedback that is relevant and helpful?
I mean, I wouldn't go complaining about the rules of the road on an imageboard where most people don't have a license or live near any roads.
It just seems STUPID AS FUCK if you ask me. I have a mind that is pretty geared to problem solving and OP seems like his brain is more geared for being dumb
>>26655754
>It's like a really intricate dance where one wrong move can completely turn a girl off. The problem is that the rules are not implicitly written anywhere.
The rules are pretty simple.
Women like men who are physically attractive, socially prestigious and rich. If possible they want all three, but real life is almost never that perfect so women accept the best they can get.
Physically attractive = Tall, low body fat, muscular, good facial aesthetics, good hair cut, well fitting clothes.
Socially prestigious = Famous, popular, leadership roles, interesting career.
RICH = MONEY
Chad Thundercock doesn't have to do an intricate dance where he can turn off a girl with one wrong move, 'hey babe you wanna fuck?' is as deep as he gets. If you are sexually attractive to women then you can do all sorts of stupid aspie shit and she will not care.
The really intricate dance is just a way women screen out unattractive men without having to admit to themselves they are shallow. If women are making you do it then you are the male equivalent of the fat ugly chick with a great personality.
Ever think about how bullshit this is?
not really
men and women have different roles in society
the lack of physical fitness required by women to be pretty is reflected by the fact that they don't have to do any physical work in their lives.
>>26655804
Or any work, period
Everyone knows that many (most?) white women that look half decent and come from a middle class family have life on easy mode.
A man? Go to college, hit the gym, get a high-paying white collar job, work 60 hours a week. Woman? Look decent, stay at home and go shopping all the time.
How many people would be upset if you killed yourself?
How many who aren't blood relatives?
2.
You can guess which ones.
>>26655475
>How many people would be upset if you killed yourself?
only a cou-
>How many who aren't blood relatives?
none
>>26655475
does someone have the original picture of those monkey things fighting, it always gives me a good laugh.
>25m
>acne
>nothing gets rid of it
>doctor won't give me accutane
JUST
Have you tried bathing? Scrubbing your face with soap and water from time to time? Drinking water every day? Oh right, this is /r9k/, where if you're not content with wallowing in filth and tendie crumbs you're just normie scum
>>26655410
>25 meters
OP:
>Change your pillow covers and bed sheets. 100% positive you haven't in awhile and all the drool eventually forms bacteria on your face when you sleep.
>Wash your face 2 times a day. Use acne wash.
>When washing your face put some very hot water on your acne spots so it opens the pores up.
>Stop eating processed sugary shit. Eat vegetables and eat a fuck ton of fruit: Vitamin C is good for your hair and skin.
>Eat meats to help with muscle growth and your skin.
>Always shave with a new razor everytime. Old razors usually have nasty grub on them which can cause razor burns and acne.
>girl talking to me, gave me her number
>she's boring as watching paint dry
>cute though
>and I don't have to fucking tiptoe through eggshells and have razor sharp wits and funnies to keep her replying though
>but she's 18 and i'm 25 so it feels kinda weird
What should I do?
dude shes cute AF continue with her
>>26655380
What makes her boring, exactly?
>>26655472
Doesn't say a while lot, sometimes even 1-word replies such has 'oh'. But not in a 'this is my way of saying I don't want to talk to you' kind of way, because she keeps talking. I'll just be like ok screw off you boring fuck, here's a nice 'lol' for you and that's it, but then she'll say something to continue the convo
So, let's talk about East European pornstars,
They are so beautiful.
This one makes funny faces when she orgasms. What do you think of her?
>funny faces when she orgasms
Do you have autism anon?
>>26655368
>East European pornstars
I don't fuck with that.
I'm willing to bet a good amount are just sex slaves.
>>26655392
No, I was actually tested for it when I was younger and that's not my cognitive malfunction, nor is assburgers. nor am I retarded.
>>26655471
Well, maybe.
Has someone ever done a romantic gesture for you out of pity?
how would you feel if you were dating someone and they done a romantic gesture for a friend out of pity?
>highschool
>spirit week
>every weekday of the week has a different theme where students are expected to dress a certain way or participate in certain activities
>Thursday is 'hugs and kisses' day where you can pay for romantic telgrams to deliver to someone you like
>there's a guy in one my classes that's a loner type and someone ratted out that he has a crush on me
>we never talk, but he always turns really red when I see him during pass period
>see him sitting by himself during lunch
>hand him a Polaroid of me with a short friendly message written on Hello Kitty stationary
>hug him from behind and kiss him on cheek and tell him 'happy hugs and kisses day'
Nah man can't even get pity.
>>26655192
>Has someone ever done a romantic gesture for you out of pity?
No
>how would you feel if you were dating someone and they done a romantic gesture for a friend out of pity?
Like costanza says, pity is underrated.
How can a man be expected to ensure such humiliation?
>>26655179
So he's not angry that his sister is getting plowed, he's angry that it happened before he lost his own virginity?
>slob
>has no car
>while daddy bought me my BMW
pussy, not man. this guy was born in the wrong body, like most of r9k.
start making your own decisions in life, start taking care of yourself before thinking of taking care of someone else.
>>26655228
Yes.
He was a narcissist.
Just how easy to girls have it?
Pic related is twitch streamer, now working for playboy
http://imgur.com/a/w42Uu
>>26655172
To be fair, she's attractive.or at least attractive on some level, considering the manface
>>26655172
Playboy is non nude now and every company is trying to steal the online audience
She has an online audience and there's no tits out so it's not EW SLUT it's OMG NEW AN EMPOWERING!1!!I have the cover girl on my facebook for a while now and idk how to feel about it
>>26655172
So.. are any of you guys an epic contributor?
>easy as shit job
>pay comes in 5 digits
>no women bullshit at all
>learning to take and dish out some banter
The hours are long, but who the fuck cares when the place is fucking awesome?
>work at a package shipping center
>bust my ass and bleed for $12/h
>have to do all the worst shit because everyone is old, the women are too weak, and nobody can speak english
>only get like $200 after a 25 hour work week
>going to get fired because I have weird stomach bacteria that make me use the bathroom every 2 hours, which is too often for my kike bosses
>back is getting bad, already have scoliosis
>too poor to afford a mattress, have been sleeping on the floor for the past year
kill me now please
>>26654884
>pay comes in 5 digits
You're talking annual, I assume? Are you a union worker or non-union?
I used to work recieving side, which I guess is generally the shit-test for people before sending them to the actual warehouse/distribution center. We had a fair amount of women and retards, the truly horrible ones tended to quit or get fired within a month but we had a few that made me want to bash my head against a wall.
Very unsatisfying work, I'd only do it again as a last resort.
>>26654884
>Work in warehouse for 5 years.
>Good at first.
>Lately been right dodgy shit desu.
>Literally telling everyone the company is cutting costs and tryin' to save.
>So we're all expected to work harder.
>They literally then waste money on a bunch of machines that don't even work. I'm talking millions of pounds.
>Then, they have to pay this guy that they fired for theft no less, 60 grand comp and backpayments because they couldn't even bother to turn up at a tribunal.
>All of this kinda shit happening all the time, but we get called in the office for a 40 minute conversation to discuss why we had a 2 minute gap in our work.
>We also use voice recognition equipment... which logically would be noise sensative. SO what does management do? LITERALLY EVER 5 MINUTES THEY SCREAM DOWN THE TANNOY SYSTEM. This creates those little 2 minute gaps that they complain about.
I want to see my company go under, I don't give a fuck if I lose my job, so long as management loses theirs too.
Considered taking a list of complaints to corporate. Looked online about law firms too.
They've ignored complaints about the tannoy system and how it affects our performance, as well as still have a go at us for our performance - technically this means it's a hostile work environment. We could all sue... but I think no one wants to trouble but each day there and I'm starting to want that fight more and more.
Warehouse work sucks balls. I literally just wanna do my job, and these assholes make up tonnes of bullshit to drag us in the offices and complain. Bitch, this is why we're losing money, how'd you get this fuckin' job?
Is shrek a metaphor for isolated misanthropes being reintegrated into society through romance? Or is it about how only two people of a kind can understand each other (ogre/ostracized person). Or is it about how women have high standards despite not deserving what they want?
Thoughts?
>>26654868
i thought this was a shitpost, but this is a fair point. Maybe it IS meant to show the whole 'looks aren't everything' idea.
>>26654868
It's about onions, OP. Nothing else.
>>26654868
THIS IS MY SWAMP
>tfw you have a thing for bald men
Why am I such a freak?
DOES THIS MAKE YOU MOIST
>>26654792
Because you're an RPing faggot
>>26654792
>Why am I such a freak?
Because you're a tranny.
A very attractive transgender girl just told me this on Tinder.
What do I do?I'm not gay...
>>26654582
Don't reply. Unless you're a faggot.
>>26654582
post a better picture of her
this is an original comment
fuck her in the butt
