Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7132. page
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SO U SAYIN
*posts poo-poo pee pee pepe*
DAT WE
*scrapes smegma into pickle jar*
GOTS TO BE
*spends neetbux on degenerate weeb sextoys*
OURSELVZ N SHIT
*complains about normies*
IN ORDA FO US TO
*checks to see if Reddit thread earned karma*
GET LAID?
AYOOOOO/int/ blease go
SO HOLD ON BOSS
*shakes head*
WHAT YOU SAYINGS
*works in call center*
YOU TELLINGS ME WE WILL
*does Bollywood dance*
THEES TINGS WE ARE DOING
*worships cow*
WHAT YOU SAYING BOSS
*opens convenience store*
WHAT IS HAPPENINGS IS
*shits in designated street*
DOING POO IN THE LOO
>>25224760
t. Pepe Grenouille
Bout to Greentext some Tard OC
The Saga of Blub
>My first experience with the tardarino named Blub
> This story takes place way back in 4th grade
> On my first day of soccer practice
> Blub had downs
> Like superhardcoredowns.exe
> For some fucking reason my school allowed him to play soccer with us thinking it would integrate him into society better
> But were they in for a surprise
> They had all of our faggot asses lined up, doing some bull shit drill
> And the tard of the town, Blub, sauntered up behind me
> I was like, 'ok whatever no big deal'
> thing is, I'd never met or seen his violent and pure strength before
> then, out of the corner of my eye, a soccer ball comes out of nowhere
> I hit the deck but, Blub wasn't so quick
> I hear a snarl
> it resonated deep within my skull and fear slowly crept into my soul
>the Tard prowess was awakening as his ancestors lent him their strength
>>25224751
Go on OP I'm listening.
OC is always good.
> B.O rolled off of his hulking shoulders like waves of dark energy
> the tard was powering up
> I look over my shoulder as I pick myself off the ground,
> his shoulders are heaving up and down
> spittle is dripping off his pimply face as rage fills his gaze
>Sweat forming on his brow was causing the band-aid that was always on his forehead to slowly peel off.
> his body of straight muscle tenses up, ready to charge
>the poor little fag I was thought I could escape his clutches
> and I tried
> scrambling to distance myself was a valiant effort, but not enough
> he pounced catching my right ribs in the hardest fucking punch I've ever seen dealt
> the sheer power of the blow awed me as I was thrown back to the ground
> I rose to my feet once more
> only to feel his hot and wet breath caress the nape of my neck
> my jersey was suddenly gripped by a vice-like claw
>tugging on my clothing, he let the entirety of his body go limp
> all 110 pounds on a 4th graders back was too much and I fought to stay upright, but to no avail
> my knees buckled,
(when people talk about dead weight, it's no joke)
> my unmuscular knees couldn't handle the pressure and my left knee hyperextended bringing us both crashing to the ground.
> Blub was screeching covering up my faggot sobs as the pain in my ribs and leg immobilised me
> The wranglers soon arrived, but it was too little too late.
> Blub had accomplished his goal of revenge
> The two of them could barely drag him off of me
> He kicked and screamed, hitting one of the Wranglers in the cheek
> but they managed to put him in a full body lock till he stopped tweaking out
> I had to go to the hospital
>turns out that I had two fractured ribs and a torn ACL
> Never underestimate the pure strength a tard can possess
P.S They put Blub in some special tard lockdown facility never to be seen again. :?)
Bump a dump
Well? What do you think
>>25224687
Nah, despite what you robots think most men are dogs and fuck anything that moves. People are shitty regardless of gender.
>>25224708
Well men are attracted to 80% of women they meet while women are only attracted to 20% of men - I wonder which gender is shallow?
>>25224859
Do you have any proof for this statistic at all? It gets thrown around like a holy fact all the time here.
Carry a small pocket knife with you tomorrow. You will become the hero who can open all the packages and boxes.
wooa thanks thats a good idea
>>25224544
No need, I'll be carrying my katana
nice literal stolen post from reddit you retart
Anybody have experience with that sort of stuff?
*raises eyebrow* I didn't know that was actually a thing.
Bumping for interest.
>>25224509
Just remember to cut holes in the box.
99% scam
1% ugly bitches looking for citizenship that will fuck your life up in a split of a second
100% chance you'll have your shit fucked up
i like fapping to amateur videos of my race of woman (Asian) with another race of men, because im watching a video that i probably wasn't meant to watch.
its taboo, and fascinating. i feel a little envy, but more than the envy i want to see the woman orgasm.
i'll watch mainstream produced porn too, but usually i just pass over them because they don't have the genuine attraction/energy that legit amateur videos seem to have.
my favorite position to watch the man fuck her is from the back, or doggystyle.
amateur videos of pretty Asian women with white or black guys are pretty rare, but if you dig around enough you will find some.
That is interracial, not cuckold... you fucking retard
>>25224313
interracial is cuckold thanks to websites like BLACKED.COM and Thaistreethookers etc
i'm addicted to interracial pictures. i like happy IR couples, they always make me feel some type of way.
but seeing the same IR couples posted over and over, you know that coupling is pretty dead in the water.
Hello, fellow robots!
If any of you feel like doing something else rather than deal with these stupid holidays, come join this thread and draw with us
You could draw bad christmas feels, good christmas feels, just feels, something that's happened to you, or just avatarfag!
Freestyle it.
Everyone is welcome and everything is permitted, Photoshop, MS Paint, Notepad
Sorry about the image, all I have on this laptop is MS Paint and a drawing of a chicken leg so I had to improvise
here's my contribution
i hope santa brings me death this year
>>25224265
>spend almost all my time working a crappy job i hate
>listen to the same 6 christmas songs all day
Truely working in retail is the worst kind of hell
MEEEEERRRY CHRISTMAS ROBOTS
I'm ill and I can't go anywhere.
Let's have a thread about anything.
What kind of illness?
>>25224886
Mental.
Robotic block.
Let's make this a women hate thread then
26 F in a LTR
"nice" and "sweet" according to some people
only attract meh friends (work friends, eventually they all fall out)
been this way for as long as I can remember, started up strong at 18. Though the craving is always there, having meh friends meant my outings were limited. Partying could be bar hopping, hotel in another city, concerts. Just drinking (friends sometimes weed), and I don't hold back when drinking and usually get suckered into having more.
even ended up trying coke recently, not something I'd even consider sober
most people I think would say fill my time with constructive activities like working out, cooking good food etc or tame distractions like movies and video games. Anyone have other advice?
Bumping this. Nearly exact Same situation. 21m here.
>>25224214
>Anyone have other advice?
>26 F
>F
Yes, I have an advice for you. Get the fuck off my board you beef curtains flapping roastie.
No civilized man ever regrets a pleasure, and no uncivilized man ever knows what a pleasure is.
After copious research and investigation I've concluded that the lizard people/aliens are indeed real and among us, they hold most high ranking positions on this planet and are conspiring for our collective human demise. They want to depopulate the earth of humans so they can harvest the planet of a valuable resource that's situated 100km under the earth's crust.
Reminder that if there IS any major global conspiracy, you wouldn't find anything about, highlighted in plain sight on the top of a Google search or Youtube documentary.
The only conspiracy is that there is no conspiracy.
this is pretty much accurate, OP
I wonder why the greys are making hybrids. Are they fixing themselves? They are going to use them as pawns to most efficiently control society? Both?
Independently of how absurd things are, the situation looks bleak. My optimistic pet theory is that they just didn't fucked us over definitely because there are more powerfull species wanting to see the ant farm experiment longer, and so the more noxious ones are forced to eat by the sides until the plate finally gets cold enough.
The only thing I slightly like to do anymore is sleep. It's the only thing I look forward too. Who else here just sleeps all day, letting your problems sink in?
I had a dream today that I was a camera and a 50 year old Mitch Hedberg was recording himself and talking to me and I was laughing so hard at the funny shit he was saying. I had a realization that death is just sleep and I remember hoping that I'll be able to still have these absurd visions in my sleep after I pass.
When I woke up, I thought about how odd it was that I was still alive and I wasn't a camera recording a post mortem Mitch Hedberg record a message for a friend in the afterlife
>>25224163
I know how you feel, OP. I also feel the same about eating - do you still enjoy a good pizza?
>>25224267
Not really. I mean it's okay, but my taste buds have been dying a bit too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2GT1rCAFuo
....and how does this make you FEEL?
>>25224130
>and how does this make you FEEL?
Bonery but same time annoyed.
>mfw my bimbo fetish makes me want to fuck girls this stupid and annoying
GOD DAMN FUCKING CAPTCHA I CHOSE ALL THE DAMN STREET NAMES
THA FUCK IS SHE ON
>talk to girl who is younger than me
>she says she isn't a virgin
>gross as fuck do not want
>talk to girl who is older than me
>she says she isn't a virgn
>I don't feel any indifferent about them
Anybody have the same feels? I'm 22 and would fuck a 30 year old regardless of her past but whenever I talk to girls my age, I expect them to be virgins or I don't find them attractive.
>implying I talk to girls
Come on, you have to at least talk to girls online.
It actually depresses me to meet girls who lost their virginity at like 13-15
Not because I didn't have sex at that age, but because you can always tell those girls have messed up views about life, sex, relationships, etc.
Basically, stay away from nymphos
>>25224175
I believe people who lose their virginity that young (both male and female) have unstable households and are emotionally retarded. They never turn out to be successful. That doesn't mean you shouldn't fuck them if given the chance though.
>>25224129
>Come on, you have to at least talk to girls online.
where do you find girls to talk to online, normie?
Who /midnight mass/ here?
thats dumb af familia
I have a native family so I was raised a dirty heathen, I've always wanted to go to mass or some shit just to see what I'm missing.
>>25224324
careful, the catholics are eager to forbid you from speaking your language and may force you to suck the priest's wiener and then beat you
Christmas Eve alone in your room
whole family in an argument
>>25224083
>whole family in an argument
About what issue?
>>25224083
I hate christmas.Every year the same sht
>>25224121
about non relevant shit. just everyone pissing off eachother
![RaQ769v[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/zpISHhh.png "RaQ769v[1]")
