Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3709. page
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>tfw first gf
Who else knows this feel?
Yes. I can finally identify with all those emotions others feel, fiction or not. Feels like another world has opened up to me.
Just you wait anon, you may be happy now, but you'll regret feeling that happiness later after she leaves you, and you know she will. It may be years, it may be months, it may be even weeks, but it will happen, and it will hurt.
>>28058074
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
LEAVE
LEAVE
LEAVE
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARFGFDGDFGF
What's your drug of choice r9k? Do you like things that help you escape? (Dissociatives, pot, alcohol, Benzos) ones that help you perform better? (Stimulants, steroids), or shit that helps you explore your inner subconscious, memories, but kills your ego and biases, while also seeing a shit ton of pretty colors? (LSD, Shrooms, DMT, Mescaline)
I personally love LSD. Makes me feel so content but at the same time ambitious. And oh god the visual effects. It's so surreal. Use to be a temporary pot smoker but that shit made me way too lazy and drug tests.
>>28058060
Just weed.
That's all I want.
That's literally all I want in my life.
>>28058120
I can't do that shit man personally. As fun as it is, it for me for some reason is very addictive to me. I found it more addictive than ciggerates, speed or Alcohol. And as safe as it is, it just made me a lazy peice of shit. But people are different. If it works out for you, I'm glad :) just be responsible
don't do drugs often because i'm a good boy vegan that cares about health but i think kratom, alcohol and benzos occasionally are pretty cool. drinking off a bottle of wine and fapping while I'm just getting buzzed is a pretty good feeling.
This is going to sound far out there but have you ever had your ear fucked with by a Chinese chick?
by making a odd popping noise real near it
>>28058020
Is this a proposition? I'm down to be ear fucked by a shchink if you are one.
Chinese ear pressure shit. Who would have thought of such s thing?
>>28058020
you mean like asian ear cleaning type things?
where you put your head in a cute girls lap and she cleans your ear?
DESIGNATED
When will pajeet learn?
Mutant turtle, just needs to train ninja skills and survive until teenage.
>>28057981
>mutant shit turtle
>>28057981
He will never learn. He is too busy running IRS scam calls with his cousins.
What did you last fap to?
>What was your last fap to?
>Post the image, or if it's a video, screen cap it with Gyazo at the scene you busted to.
Pic not related
It was my hardest fap
series of images similar to this
Busted a nut to this just a few minutes ago
The future is so bright, don't you see it bros?
>>28057893
you can tell by their expressions they know something ain't right, but they don't want to be racist
Is this a gay couple?
>>28058198
they look fine
>>28058222
Yes, they are their 3 adopted daughterus
If a Femanon calls out your name, they are now dating you!
I'll start with
>Fike
it's statistically impossible that a femanon will ever guess my name
just like real life i guess, i guess none will ever date me
>Harrison
(i hope he sees this and actually has to date me)
>>28057849
Hey, my name's pretty close to that.
wya bb
Why haven't you had your wife take african embryos?
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2016/04/21/my-wife-and-i-are-white-evangelicals-heres-why-we-chose-to-give-birth-to-black-triplets/
Wtf, whites are doomed!
I can't watch you do this to yourselves...
>>28057789
FUCKING CHRISTKEKS GOD DAMN IT
>>28057789
I meant to post this on /pol/, I fucked up.
>>28057820
Threads been there a million times this week already, I'm pretty sure we all know about the white Christian cucks by now.
I'm going to cut my balls to inspire betas to leave the normie path
>>28057779
bampitty titties
>>28057779
i have a few videos of this if you are interested op
people cutting off their balls
>>28057779
OP don't be a fucking retard, hurting yourself isn't going to do anything besides make you famous for being a retard on the internet for 15 minutes and then it goes away and all that's left is you being mutilated for nothing. Go lift instead.
No creepypastas, just real stories by real anons. Lets make Friday comfy (again)
Not exactly spooky scary skeletons, but this shit had me spooped
>Walking down street
>see two bunnies playing with each other in some grass nearby
>Aw_How_Cute.JPG
>one hops towards fence
>other ones hops towards side of house
>see the first one hop towards the fence and then disappear
>What The Fuck?
>stop
>look at the fence, don't see the bunny on the other side
>there's an opening in it, but it's way too small for the bunny to get through
>look towards side where the other one hopped
>there's a wooden fence with no opening and no sign of the bunny
>what the literal fuck
I'm not even making this up, this happened a bit back and it still bothers me, I don't know if I was seeing shit or what but I swear that's what I saw
>be messing around with spoopy stuff to see if anything happens
>few weeks pass and im in bed going to sleep
>suddenly the whole room illuminates red and the bed starts shaking
>Get really excited
>it all passes in like 10 secs
It happened one time again, but without the bed shaking. Nothing else spoopy has happened since then, unfortunately
>>28057758
>summer when I was 16
>parents were out for the day and my sister went to the library so I was home alone during the day
>left my garage open on accident and there was a door that led into my living room
>I heard footsteps and the doorknob struggling to jiggle
>assumed it was my sister
>"just open it, it's not locked!" I yelled from across the room
>doorknob struggles more
>"I SAID-" then there's vicious pounding like they're trying to kick the door down
>JFC it's not my sister it's an intruder
>I run for the kitchen to grab a knife
>grab my puppers as well
>everything goes into slow motion
>trying to run but I keep tripping like in my nightmares
>hear the intruder run around onto my deck to come in through my back door that leads into the kitchen
>lock it just in time
>trapped to hide under the table with my knife because the MINIBLINDS were open
>coming to terms that I was going to die
>covering my mouth to silent my hysterical crying
>after a few moment I hear him leave
>no use in calling the cops because I have no clue what they look like
It's been 6 years and I still can't be home alone. I start to panic and freak out
We had this thread the other day and it surprisingly took off. Thought we might try again.
If you missed it, tell us why you deserve a girlfriend. What are your qualities?
Fembots judge
I'll start, it can only go up from me
>5'6" (damn manlet genes)
>150 lbs
>Always rate 5 or 6 on /soc/
>Own a home
>Vehicle
>Good job (sys admin)
>No drug problems
>No mental illness
>No ex's or children
Thats pretty much it.
>>28077967
>150 lbs
>Always rate 5 or 6 on /soc/
>Own a home
>Vehicle
>Good job (sys admin)
>No drug problems
>No mental illness
>No ex's or children
not a femanon, but this seems pretty good. only bad part is your height :c rip.
>>28077995
yah and height kills me i think
that or a 5 on /soc/ means 2 in real life
>>28077967
I don't DESERVE a gf, but I'd like one nevertheless. Here are my qualities:
>6'2"
>72kg
>Always rate 7-8 on /soc/
>Studying Maths (whoo, usefulness)
>Fun to be around when I'm not depressed
>Know how to play guitar
>Know multiple languages
>Not overly experienced with girls, but not cluelessly inexperienced either
My god, I hope I find a gf soon. It feels so fucking lonely without one.
If you turned into a little girl, would you have sex with robots?
>>28057681
>If you turned into a little girl, would you have sex with robots?
Yes. I'd tried to make as many happy as I could.
>>28057681
no but you could send me money in exchange for pictures of me in different costumes and shit like that.
Is sexting a little girl ilegal?
No, I'd do what I do now but cuter.
So the ugly trashy white girl (who has niggers over at her house I've seen three come out of her condo and her manlet roomate allows this) is having a party tonight and i can here the music blasting already and more cars are arriving.
what to do what to do /r9k/?
I'm trying to get into sheninagans here
no suggestions?
MORE AND MORE PEOPLE ARE SHOWING UP REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>28058164
Throw your piss jugs at them.
>Tfw richfag
>keep having recurring thought about using my money to get a bunch of robots and set up a life together
>kind of like a group of bros, we'd probably settle down in Japan or some shit but maybe travel if the guys were up to it
>everytime I'm about to do it I get paranoid because I think one of the robots might be some psycho who tries to kill me in my sleep
FUCKING SHIT, HOW THE FUCK DO I GET RID OF PARANOIA?
You should probably do some research on the history of planned alternative communities, that more than anything should put you off the idea.
>>28057637
>FUCKING SHIT, HOW THE FUCK DO I GET RID OF PARANOIA?
you don't
>>28057682
this
>>28057682
>that more than anything should put you off the idea.
how so?
What are the best escort sites? There was one here that was real hush husk but looked legit
>>28057601
How about saying where you live you fucking nerd
The curb in the ghetto if youre a clapper.
The brothel if you're anywhere else.
>>28057621
US of a, stl
