Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5084. page
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ITT: Fembots, describe your ideal *robot* BF
Robots who fit the bill, leave your contact for the fembot
a penis and not fat
>>27019389
anonne.shitposter on skype
>>27019389
That sounds like me. But I expect you to have a vagina and not fat.
I JUST lost my virginity to a prostitute, pic related, and i'm here to tell all the robots out there that SEX IS WAY OVERRATED. Got a bj before, we fucked in missionary, doggy style and she riding my cock, everything was delicious, and she was a sweetheart but masturbation feels way better to your cock than fucking, i jerked off to be able to cum.
Btw my porfmance was way better than i expected, i fucked about 20 minutes when i jerked off and came (she asked me to do it otherwise i think i wouldn't cum at all) so my time is great, i had no shame, no awkwardness, did everything right, fucked her good, i guess all those years of porn paid off after all.
AMA
>>27019353
Not only does your story seem bullshit once you got to the second paragraph, but obviously it won't be as good with a prostitute.
You have no connection, no real reason to be attracted to them other than their looks. You literally are paying for an interactive fleshlight.
I know the "sex is about love" thing is a meme, but at least knowing them before hand adds so much to the experience.
>>27019353
Hey guys, just ate some 4 day old mcdonalds and im here to tell you that food is way overrated. Dont waste your time trying to eat, its not worth it
>>27019411
I swear to god everything is true, i had never had full sex with a woman before today i did great, wich was strange because everyone tells you your first time is going to be horrible and awkward
>somehow got my first gf
>everything is going great
>2 months pass by
>realize I'm happy
>realize this isn't normal
>realize I'm probably getting cucked somehow
>broke up with her today
>she's mad because I didn't give her a reason
>what am I supposed to feel?
Get back with her, Anon
>>27019049
that you're a faggot
>>27019049
Time to start watching anime, cuck.
Anyone else her follow female youtubers with almost no following? Right now I have about ten or so girls who do let's plays/unboxings of weeb stuff on my subscribe list. They get at most 100 views for their videos, two of them get 10 at most, it's probably just me and her.
They are all weebs and sometimes let slip out how much of a loner they are. It's absolutely adorable and the closest I'll ever get to a girlfriend.
>>27019038
Can you give us some channels?
>>27019065
whats the point then, you moron
CHANNELNAMESNIGGA
anybody else really dislike games? I just can't get into them anymore, a game hasn't excited me since I was like 13. I just wish something made me happier, even if it is temporary.
> drugs
> games
> money
> chocolate
> alcohol
> cigarettes
these things do nothing.
>>27019016
I like older JRPGs with good music and actual stories, but I can't stomach most other games. Especially anything with voice acting. Voice acting is absolutely terrible for a game's story, regardless of the language.
Suikoden II and Xenogears, I've probably played a dozen times each.
>>27019016
i recommend music
i haven't enjoyed anything in a long time, but music i enjoy always invokes emotions, which is something i relish after years of numbness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zR2TqWDqO_w
>>27019016
Can kind of relate. Not even depressed or anything but just unbelievably bored of anything I try pretty much instantly. Sucks man.
What other board do you visit robots? Here's the boards I frequent the most
>/a/
>/b/
>/fa/
>/m/
>/pol/
>/tv/
>/x/
/jp/, /lit/, /his/ and /int/.
/a/, /jp/ and /g/
>>27019010
/sci/ every day.
Sometimes /tg/ for their CYOA threads.I fucking love CYOA threads
Remember short robots, even if a girl gives you a chance, she's going to make you be a better person than a tall guy would have to be
http://thoughtcatalog.com/sophie-martin/2014/07/9-confessions-of-a-girl-who-used-to-date-a-short-guy13-reasons-every-girl-deserves-a-tall-guy/
>>27018981
5'4" manlet here
At least I'm gay
sigh, woe is the short man
>be girlyboybot
>very slow but not retarded
>tfw no super really intelligent dom malebot bf to manipulate my mind constantly
>>27018712
I've played the opposite role in that scenario.
It's really frustrating for both parties. Would not recommend.
I bet I have the capability to totally control you but I refuse to do it...It's just wrong
I'd rather remain pure and KHHV, I don't want to hurt people
>>27018757
Why do you do this to me anon? That is cruel and wrong not to control somebody who whines for it.
>>27018740
I want it to be fully though not just a one time thing.
I want a fleshlight or similar masturbatory aid. I drunk bought a weird sleeve thing with a mouth on it over a year ago but it ripped in its first use and was pretty terrible so I threw it out.
What's the best one? Any of you robots have recommendations? I'd rather spend a little more on a good one that will last me well and feels amazing.
Any input gratefully received.
I'd prefer a vaginal one over an anus but will consider anything.
>>27018676
venus real soft
Buy a dildo instead. Prostate orgasms are fucking amazing.
I just got the basic fleshlight. Don't bother getting any super tight ones (unless you have a pencil dick) as the basic one is pretty tight. I have to use a ton of lube with it.
Has anyone else noticed there's been like a lot more talk and culture about rape? It feels like it was never there before and now all of a sudden it's happening everywhere and you hear about it almost all the time. Maybe I was just younger before but it really feels like the world just got darker and shittier
Rape was always there. It's actually good that we don't try to hide it and shame the victims anymore.
>>27018409
Oh please
Blox
>>27018322
Feminism is becoming popular and women are feeling more empowered to speak up about it
It's a good thing whether /pol/ wants you to believe it or not
I'm a 20 y/o kissless virgin, I've never even had a proper conversation with a girl before and i really need your help.
Basically I "met" a girl on the course I'm taking 1 week ago. By met, I mean stared at her from a safe distance.
shes very shy and she sits alone during lunch breaks, I also sit alone. During the ice breaker on the first day, she mentioned she likes anime. She looks a lot like pic related, basically she's absolutely fucking perfect.
My question is, how do I get her to be my gf? I have no idea where to begin. We're both very shy, so it's going to be difficult getting a conversation going. I'm too much of a beta to ask her if I can sit with her anyway.
WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?
I've literally never felt this way about a girl before, I need her to be my gf. help me out lads.
>inb4 "jus b urself :)"
>>27018054
If you ever want to have a realistic shot at being with any girl, stop acting like a bitch and say hi. You are interested in the girl right? Then ask her something that you want to know about her to get the conversation starting. It's not exactly rocket science. Also make sure to properly listen to what she is saying. If you can't remember anything she said the next time you meet her, she'll think you're only interested in getting pussy.
>>27018054
Dress nice and smell nice, be as confident as possible and talk about things you both are interested in, don't pretend to know anything you don't not to make an ass of your self, and most defiantly don't >be your self.
That's all I can give for I don't know much and the only girl that I been out with grew up with me and that helped me a lot getting to her.
>>27018054
Well you know she likes anime. If that's also an interest of yours, then that's your conversation starter. Just talk to her, man. It's the only way to know if will work.
Don't be clingy or desperate, though. Quit staring at her "from a safe distance" also. You keep doing that, she'll start to notice if she hasn't already.
Hey peeps, fembot here.
As you all know It's women's day today, and because of that I want to know if you guys have a favourite female musician. You can talk about male musicians too, as long as they make music for women.
>>27017977
Okay, here's mine:
>Justin Bieber.
Fergy I guess? Meet me halfway and glamorous are pretty good songs. Then again Paramore has Ain't it fun, and misery business. There are older pop songs too like a thousand miles.
Idk I don't listen to female bands like I listen to Alesana, Coheed, Ice 9 Kills etc.
What's the point of this thread again?
lenka or courtney barnett off the top of my head
comfy neurotic music is nice
Is there anything a 5'4 manlet can do to make his life worth living?
>>27017839
>tfw not a manlet
>tfw 19 and losing hair
>tfw no one will ever love you
>>27017839
My mother is 5ft 5 lmao
You are literally smaller than my mother
How does it feel that no one will take you seriously as a man?
>>27017839
Stop visiting this board
have you ever had a fellow neet encounter irl? like, you went out to get your food/booze/whatever and you locked eyes with a fellow loser/failure/neet and you just both intuitively knew you were brothers lol
>went out to 7/11 yesterday
>2 am, im a jobless loser etc., bad sleep schedule, bad everything
>go in and start grabbing my yummies and manchild energy drinks when a sight catches my eye
>a man lethargically walks in with a big classic neckbeard, autism shoes, large black shirt with hairon it, and had earbuds through which i can absolutely hear music from haruhi
>hes gotta be at least 25
>he gets almost exactly what i get, except he gets a big bag of funions as well
>at the register, we awkwardly walk up at the same exact time, can hear his music again
>he tries to let me go first, and i him. i finally go after an awkward standoff
>say 'thanks man'
>'no problem...'
>we are so alike, yet so distant... a serendipitous moment ill never forget
there's a 30 year old NEET who is also virtually a shut-in a few houses down from me. i remember he was always considered weird by everyone's parents growing up too, we weren't really supposed be around him alone. he would come to cookouts we had and kind of awkwardly follow his dad around and never talk.
i never thought i'd turn into him. now i am him and he is older and wiser, but the same. i consider him to be the alpha NEET in my neighborhood. the pack leader.
>>27017921
i bet you guys have a lot in common. either that or he is some sort of retard or psycho but is medicated
I've seen some that are he next level. Wizard kings for sure.
I've met other people who have been /r9k/ browsers.
But I have never met a true roboto like myself. In fact, they don't even exist.
>I am a unique special snowflake
> Spend 200$ on my crush because of this woman's day bullshit
> Flowers, parfum, ear rings, good stuff
> Spend 2 hours in the mall to gather all that shit, put it in a bag
> During break went to the table she was sitting on and handed it to her
> Told her if she wants to talk to me later in private
> "Wow...not really, but put the bag on the ground I'll take a look on what's inside later..."
> Her girlfriends giggling
W A K E M E U P
* > Ask her if she wants to talk to me later in private
>>27017786
Sounds like you dont know what your relationship is with her
are you literally in primary school? what the fuck
