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Birdman is the greatest film of all time and let me tell you why.
Riggan Thomson is a crazed ex-chad. He became a god among men when he landed his movie deal and became the Birdman. Now he's a tiny, bitter shell of his former self, desperately trying to find meaning and identity beyond birdman, and slowly realizing that there is none to be found.
Sam Thomson is a failed stacey. She had a crappy father, was constantly told she was special, believed it, and wound up crashing as a result and landed herself in rehab. She got out, and now people are desperately trying to not set her off again and everyone is trying to be nice to her, and she's disgusted by it all.
Mike Shiner is chad. He's on the top of his game, in his prime, and thinks he's hot shit. He takes every opportunity to take a jab at the former alpha, Riggan, as he can no longer enforce his alpha status and is a perfect target for anyone looking for an ego boost. Despite all of this, he's a fraud and his life means nothing.
Leslie is a normie woman who landed chad, and is euphoric that she gets to look special and be loved. She recognizes the absolute hollowness of the normie lifestyle and is desperately searching for a meaning to it all, but there is none and she can't handle that.
Jake is a toadie who still works for his chad, even though it's clear that he's attached himself to a person who is worthless. He defends Riggan and tries to keep him from going off the rails, and handles the consequences of his actions for him.
Laura is a fembot, she landed chad long after he lost his looks and his confidence. She's euphoric to be allowed to hang out with chad's people, and behaves somewhat autistically though still enjoying the privileges of being an attractive female.
Tabitha, somehow, is a female approximation of a wizard. An aging, bitter, misanthrope whose life holds absolutely no meaning, and is dedicated to tearing down normies however she can.
Cont.
Tabitha revels in having reached a position in life where she can cause suffering to normies, though she knows full well that they will continue to have fun and succeed no matter what she does.
Here's the plot.
Chad grows up and lands a movie deal with his good looks and alpha male tendencies. He is worshipped as a god for years, and his ego consumes him totally. His entire sense of being is tied into this character Birdman, and the fame and popularity he gives him.
He gets past his prime, and falls out of favor. He thinks that he can be anything meaningful without Birdman, but he's wrong, and his career goes down the fucking shitter. His daughter goes to rehab and his marriage falls apart.
Chad, humiliated and humbled, decides to throw a play to prove to the world that he's worth something, anything. He's become acquainted with the suffering that we all go through, and cannot cope. He wants out of this hell desperately, but is too much of a coward to end his own life.
He teams up with a group of normies to try and forge a new meaning for himself, and he pours everything into this endeavor. He has effectively created a new ego that he is trying to boost in the face of his old one, and the old one kicks his ass reminding him of how good he used to have it.
When one of his actors is injured, he's forced to team up with the next generation's chad, who knows his way around the environment that the former chad is desperately trying to adapt to. He proceeds to shit all over everything and generally act like an asswipe because his ego has never let him actually accept any responsibilities for his actions and he thinks he can do whatever he wants; and often can.
The two butt heads, the new alpha and the disgraced former alpha. Ex-chad is pissed off that things aren't going his way anymore and he can't intimidate this guy into toeing the line, and new chad is revelling in his ego and his freedom.
>>24104929
cont.
This comes to a head when he tries to fuck leslie, the ordinarily submissive normie girl, in front of a live studio audience. This is the first time any girl has ever refused him sex, and definitely the first time one has had the balls to kick him to the curb. He's had a brush with consequences to his actions.
Leslie, the normie, and Laura, the fembot, retreat to the changing room and share their feelings with each other. Leslie is naturally upset that Mike tried to nail her in such a nasty way and had total disregard for her consent, and is shook up at how worthless she really is to him, and to society as a whole.
Laura comforts her and proceeds to take this opportunity to kiss a woman. The two end up experiencing the feeling many a male robot has known when considering the benefits of boypucci vs. girlpussy, that the opposite sex is nothing but trouble and they should stick to theirs. Chad walks in and ruins this by trying to defuse the mounting ramifications of his actions, because nobody has ever stood up to him before and he's frightened that he's losing his status.
He then proceeds to completely forget about all that and nail the failed stacey daughter of the ex-chad, jumping right back into his consequence-free fuckfest of a life, and striking a blow to the ego of his only rival.
Ex-chad eventually confronts the witch, Tabitha. She explains rightly that she despises him and everything that he represents, and she is glad to have the opportunity so many robots had wished for to stop a normie from invading their sanctuary.
Ex-chad has learned a thing or two in his time as a failed normie, and proceeds to call her out for being nothing but a bitter person who wishes that she could be chad, wishes that she could be beloved, but can't, so she shits on everything, wallowing in impotent anger and complaining to anyone who will listen. She has been at it far too long to be intimidated by chad, however; she has access to magic, after all.
>>24104754
The movie is boring. Even the shitty parts where he hallucinates about Birdman. 2/10 movie, enjoyed only the scenes with Emma Stone.
#whitegirlsaremagic
>>24104691
>why aren't you married yet?!
>>24104730
Seen it, gives me a sick sense of pleasure to see these liberal pussies get their due.
>I'm so progressive that I let my wife fuck other men!
Being a Male Feminist is like being a sheep at a wolf convention.
I see shlomo shekelborn is posting his usual shitposts.
do women have herd mentality?
i'm afraid of doing this technique
I think I just did it. Not sure what it is supposed to do.
so this is some weird troll
wow lmao you got me it's nothing
Watched the sunrise for the first time in years edition
I'm a Paki.
>>24104577
I'd appreciate it if you didn't disrupt the Remembrance Sunday services please.
>>24104406
Warm November will soon be over..
Sad times coming
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAzzv6Ks9nc
>BITCH I'M A MIGO I PLAY WITH KILO
>do you like the internet?
>>24104361
y is young thug so fun to listen to?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tz6OUIjtM6E
>>24104388
post some
but yeah i like the internet in general, i like dank memes
Woman: word
Me: word
Woman: haha
Me: haha?
Me: <3
Me: word word word word word word!!! <3
Woman: haha word
Me: word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word
Woman: word
Me: ???
Me: =(
Me: >.<
Woman: word word
Me: word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word! word!
Woman:
Woman:
Woman:
Woman:
Woman: [has logged out]
>>24104316
Fuck, poor John Frusciante...
>>24104380
Didn't he try to kill himself once before?
>>24104316
And here I was reconsidering my stance on never getting married.
Anyone here still have these?
Feel free to post other nostalgia as well.
>>24104278
Are these from McDonald's?
>>24104318
Burger King
remember these family
so im drunk for the first time. i figured if my life is so shitty and lonely i may as well so what all the fuss is about. so i bought my own case of beer. and i dont know. i dont feel that great. a little disoriented. like im tired but my head kinda hurts. i dont really feel thta sense of euphoria i expected. i feel like im going to die.
>>24104181
Drunk bro, go make some friends and drink with them. Or, better yet, don't drink at all and make friends.
>>24104243
but im not even drunk. just stupid. i still feel normal just shittier than normal.
>>24104262
Then don't drink alone, that is rule #1 of drinking
Stop feeling bad about yourself if you do so while sober, make some friends go to the gym study philosophy find a hobby whatever I just don't want to see another robot on the verge of suicide/school shooting
Who /texas/ here
Bryan/College Station checking in
Fort Worth reporting in
Pretty uncomfy up here
>>24104196
Houston wassup
>pic related
It's about leaving Austin.
>>24104196
I'm a fan of DFW but its too big for me to feel comfy
>You are using a 4chan Pass.
I legit use a 4chan Pass. Have had it since it came out.
Fuck you capchaplebs
considering how much time I spend on this shit hole, I figure giving 4chan 20$ a year is pretty feasible.
word 2 that
Your first BJ story thread:
>Be 19, virgin
>Parents away for weekend for first time in literally ever
>Ask girl I really like to come over
>Says yes
>Start drinking start making out
>'Do you want a bj anon?'
>Oh god oh god oh god
>Phone blasting dank tunes in the background
>Frozen let it go comes on
>Girl stops, looks at me
>'Anon'
>Change music
>Half an hour later still havent cum coz drunk
>Have to jack myself off manually
>The cold never bothered me anyway
>>24103906
woah I seriously doubt this happen and i stopped reading the green text
but i do believe that you remember your first blowjob and I gotta ask you this.
How long did it take for the guy to cum?
>>24103906
>have virgin gf
>she has no idea what she's doing
>can hardly get it in her mouth
>we agree to stop
amazing
>>24103941
>>24103906
OH SHIT OP YOU GOTTA GET SOME WATER SENPAI LMAO FUQ
What's their purpose? I have met a lot of people In my life that are just cruel, human trash. Why do I breathe the same air as them? How could they have no remorse? Should they be alive? People who just victimize others, I have met many of the other byproducts of that.
>>24103899
their purpose is to gather on 4chan and whine about how mean everyone is to them.
They can exist by nature or by nurture or both. How they came to exist is usually too much work to learn though, and once you know someone is not good for you it is best to cut them out of your life.
hey newfag, welcome to /r9k/. just to prevent you from getting insulted for every next post you make, the slang term for "toxic people" is normie.
It's literally this easy guys. don't you wanna win?
>>24103816
Clothes are expensive and you look like a tool dressing business casual without a job that calls for it.
>all you have to do is be chad and dress like this
ftfy
I have to dress like that every weekday. Nobody gives a fuck what you wear with a hideous face.
AYYY FAMILY YOU ALREADY KNOW WHO IT IS
SILEN-TO
SILEN-TO
SILEN-TO
STANKY LEG STANKY LEG
NOW WATCH ME WHHHIPP
NOW WATCH ME MAY MEY
i've got some good ones
>live with parents
>used to staying up till 3-4 AM
>parents hate this because they think its "adding to my depression when i lose sleep"
>whatever, never wake up at night anyway
>food cycle adjusts slowly, start making dinner at 1 AM every night
>one day my mother wakes up
>shit shit shit, not in the mood for the inevitable argument
>turn off all light, get as far away from kitchen as possible
>"what the hell are you doing anon?"
>can't think of anything, blurt out first thing that comes to mind
>"i've been secretly dating a girl online for all year and she just broke up with me"
>mother feels bad for me
>we spend like an hour discussing relationships
>all this time i have to ensure she doesn't look at the kitchen and spot my dinner
>she gets super sentimental, hugs me, says i at least managed to make a girl like me
>mfw
>year or so later
>making dinner again
>she hears me again
>fuck
>"umm..uh...i heard the cat crying, i think its stuck"
>she actually believes me
>we spend the next hour searching the entire house for the "lost stuck cat"
>i have to carefully guide her around the kitchen the whole time so she doesn't see my fucking sandwich with chips
>we find it sleeping in my room
>"oh haha...guess im just tired then"
When the robot arrives, quality green text will always follow.
RK9!
RK9!
>>24103674
>embarrassed of eating
Why, she knows you're a NEET in the kitchen. Kind of obvious you're snacking, but try to avoid immediately laying down after eating so late k?
Btw, OP...yer gonna need some better greentext. If you can't get close to the guy who dicked his dad down on a boat(at sea) then you aren't good enough yet. Can you match the man who guzzled cum to save his ass?!
These are greentext tales lad. Come with it man.
