Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3414. page
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How does one acquire this kind of girlfriend?
>>28269046
>le socially awkward 9/10 gf
fuck off back to anime land
>>28269046
if you go to school. its the really ugly asian girl with no friends
>>28269089
How's this?
howisthisblox
>mom got a frozen ham from a friend
>popped it in the oven
>ate some
>feel lethargic and tired
>feel heat all over my body
>check the expiration date
>December 12, 2015
>>28268914
You got hamcucked
rip
Origanil commont i swear
>>28268914
U dead homie
any board. Starting with #1.
there's no such thing as a femanon, only a slut, do not give sluts attention
saged, reported, enjoy the ban, etc
>>28268861
that's not the spirit anon
>>28268945
Ayyy lmmmaaoooooo
please come in peace
ITT: Everyone in this thread is now a god. What do you do? What is your sphere of influence? What do you look like? What do you do to all the normies who bullied you? The ones who stood up for you? What do you do about every other anon ITT and how do you protect your followers from their influence?
>>28268796
My sphere of influence is early 20th century art. Everyone who bullied me is forced to read Canthos again and again until they are able to appreciate its beauty for all eternity. I remove politics and that shitty feminism from the face of earth, and replace them with appretiation of beauty and endless self-expression through revolutionary creativity. People uncapable of these things are recycled for meat, paper and painting tools.
>>28268796
I'd make myself a qt loli and appear to neckbeards at random offering sage advice. I'd watch their onetis secretly and tell them hoe to seduce them. My sphere would be... shit idk, something relating to helping lonely virgins
Call me an edgster if you want but I would flat out be a god of terror and would lure normies into horror movie situations and hunt them on my own personal holiday. People who help lure them in would be my followers and I would reward them with minor psychic abilities. Pic Related is kinda the look I would go for as my "true form"
Anon is pronounced: uh-non - as if you were to say Anonymous, without the ymous.
NOT: ay-non
NOT: an-non
NOT: ah-non
Or any of other retarded shit I've heard retards say.
UH-NON
You have been informed.
>>28268757
>tfw tried saying anon out loud multiple times
it doesn't sound right
Dude who gives a shit?
Ay-Non master race
![11258118_961147760582923_2046437950_n[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/yzvVSEi.jpg "11258118 961147760582923 2046437950 n[1]")
Redpill: Male friends do NOT exist
Only real male friends that I had wanted to fuck me/oral.
You have it backwards, females are incapable of friendship and are treated as such
Wrong I have 8 female friends and have only wanted to fuck 2 of them at some point.
Lol that is a VERY ignorant thing to say just because all attractive males want your cunt doesn't mean all males do
Fuck you I just want a platonic relationship with a female friend I don't even need to fuck anyone but I am far too ugly and my personality is too shit for that
Would you be capable of jacking off to completion in front of a girl as she cheers you on? Or just to porn?
>>28268516
I can get off to the thought of holding hands with a girl, so i would be more than capable of this. Why did you make this thread?
I've tried it before, sans cheering, and I couldn't finish. It just felt awkward.
I literally jerk off to this type of porn, search JOI CEI
Dearest robots,
I have a gift for you.
Fear is the only thing that is going to permanently stop her from posting and associating herself with this board. It's unfortunate and I'm really sorry Eliza, but enough is enough. I'm so sick of you. So fucking sick of seeing you.
http://pastebin.com/qiXAWbDe
She needs to leave and never come back, she really doesn't belong here, it's been said too many times, and she's been given so many chances. Eliza, be content with what you already have, most of us on here are just lonely permavirgin betas, and I hate the way you present yourself as someone attainable and the perfect qt gf. But in reality you laugh at us behind your back with your online friends, and you take advantage of the betas lonely enough to add you. You've hurt too many people.
https://desustorage.org/r9k/thread/28213269/#q28263571
dont you ever let your orbiters see the stranger in yourself
>>28268407
You're doing God's work anon.
Eliza is a whore and she deserves nothing less than eternal exile. Probably worse.
>>28268407
She hurt no one except dumb fucks betas like you
>be me
>cutting the grass to avoid people
>it's fucking hot and I have worked hard
>it's Miller Time!
My friends, it doesn't matter if you are at home, out at Olive Garden, picking a friend up from Red Lobster or flying Delta, any time is Miller Time.
The delicious mix of fine Dutch hops and cool water brew a product that shouldn't be missed. At 8.99 for a 12-pack, you'd be an absolute lunatic to pass up the savings and value.
Head on down and pick up some Miller lite today!
>>28268317
>taking advantage of depressed alcoholics to shill your shit beer
that's low
>>28269458
>not sucking schlomos goldren piss water down to make you forget your problems for a few hours
>>28269530
I do. Pbr is much better though
How much do you get paid? Honestly curious. Your employer won't find out, just tell me
You made it to Wizardhood!
Wizardhood has awaken latent powers within you.
http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Special:Random
But with powers comes a shift in your alignment
http://www.seventhsanctum.com/generate.php?Genname=ralign
(first alignment listed is your alignment)
>>28268217
Anal-Retentive Neutral and Galaxy Destruction. Am I cool yet, senpai?
Chaotic fashionable with Composite Deity Physiology - http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Composite_Deity_Physiology
I am the Whimsical God of Fashion
Angry good with bat physiology
I guess I use my angst and bat powers to fight evil wizards now. Thanks for giving me purpose, senpai.
This place makes me sad as hell. Half of you fuckers haven't even graduated high school, but you've already given up on a life outside your cum stained little corner of your childhood bedroom. I was one of you hopeless degenerates, once upon a time. No life outside of my geeky hobbies, no gf, virgin, no college plans, no car, no future, etc. Now I'm 28, married, have a degree, a car, a great job, and zero debt. If I can turn it around, so can you. If one of your potential successes lives in the winston salem area, I propose this: We meet up and I mentor you into being an honest to god, functional man. You'll get in shape, learn to talk to women, stop being a bitter little faggot, stop creeping out your relatives, make friends, set life goals, and become a better person in general. No cost to you whatsoever. No catches, just want to help you turn it around before the world gets another Christopher Chandler to deal with.
>>28268164
The "I was like you guys, I swear, Imgonnahelp u now!" thread. Fuck off tbqh.
>>28268164
and what prey tell do you gain from this?
>>28268346the satisfaction of having helped someone. There was nobody there to show me the way, so I'd like to be there for someone who needs it.
>tfw no skeptical F.B.I agent gf to hunt down aliens with
Why live?
>>28268132
Mommy Gilly a CUTE
She has been probably gangbanged by the whole crew of x-files though
>>28268132
truly suffering OP I can understand
>someone uses your reaction image
is there a finer feeling?
>someone keeps reposting your memes
>make OC
>post it once
>see it reposted one time, years later, and never again
>>28268129
>somebody steals your original comment before you had a chance to post it
would you want to have kids with a niggress like pic releated? well you would like to have a sex n shit but kids?
keep in mind no matter how white you where they would be brown, still niggers
I had a daughter with one. She takes after me in plenty of ways, which is kind of surprising when you contrast me and her mother.
>>28268086
I don't like wannabes. In this case, the girl uses a wig or relaxers to wannabe a white girl. Embrace your heritage.
>>28268086
That one? Na. She's cute, but I like darker, thicker women.
But a black woman in general? Yeah I would.
Who /numb/ here?
I feel like I'm slowly fading. Things are getting more and more boring, like a track on repeat. I think about things over, and over, and over, until they get completely deconstructed and lose their meaning. Everything seems unimportant. The few things that manage to trigger and emotional response out of me just make me feel melancholic.
I'm drifting away.
>>28268064
same.
After a while, everything just blends together into one entire motion blur.
It's been like this for a few days. How do I fix this r9k?
>>28268097
There's no way out. You can
>delude yourself
>kill yourself
>go on with no purpose
That's it
Yeah, I pretty much only feel like sleeping and being alone
nothing really feels meaningful anymore so I just want it to end
