Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 554. page
- Home
- Board: /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
- Reading: Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 554. page
Literally just got friendzoned in less than two weeks. I really liked her too.
>>29781548
she invited you to her cabin brah?
>>29781548
I will never put myself in a position to be rejected or friendzoned
>>29781548
>Using a tablet
>In 2016
Serves you right OP, you tosser.
Do you agree with this statement?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00xegtA-qMk
>>29781506
Sure. Whatever. I just want a fucking gf. I don't care about reproducing. Mass immigrations or eugenics breeding programs or in vitro fertilisation or whatever, I don't care where babies are gonna be coming from in the future.
no I want to fug every cute girl
20% of men impregnate 80% of the women in the world
this has been scientifically proven
>be 19
>meet girl
>10/10 to me
>smart
>same sense of humour somehow
>she's 27
Why
I'm 24 and dating a 35yo. It's not impossible desu. Just be yourself.
>>29781488
Eh, I'd go for it...
22 here dating 30 yo. Pic is me. Just bee yourself opiee.
What do you do if you're a girl who's too scared to talk to anyone and is consequently painfully single? How do I stop being so scared of people?
Talk to inoffensive looking people. They're often inoffensive.
>>29781460
Just have like a wine cooler or something
>>29781482
Yeah but what do I talk about?
Why is he the only musician that understands sadness
>SEE MY FACE WHEN I SLIDE THROUGH
my buddy ran into him at a party
>>29781356
because he's swedish lol
>there are people on this plane of existence who unironically think waifus > real women
How is this even a thing? Self delusion and sour grapes come to mind but is there more to such pathetic cuckoldry?
>>29781338
Nice bait faggot. Clearly you've never been cheated on or fucked over monetarily by a 3D.
I haven't either but I'm aware enough to understand the issues
My waifu is a real woman. I keep dreaming of the day where I'll get to see her in person.
>>29781338
real women will cheat on you and leech off your money. who is the real cuck now?
So, this board won't let me type anything that has already been typed, and you guys hate women?
>>29781309
I don't just hate women, I actively try to pee on as many women as I can in public.
>>29781309
It's really women that hate me. I'm just a little bit bitter, that's all.
>>29781309
why shouldn't I stacey
I suppose I still miss that ex-bf of mine that I met on here. Honestly, I know 4chan is probably the best place to find someone. Real life is a terrible place to find anyone, because the possibility of running into any compatible homos in the nearby area is an impossibility; dating sites are awful, because people will invariably converse (or decline to) based on a person's profile pic - plus, all users go in with the mentality that one meets people for dating, whereas on an imageboard, people usually meet based on a more specific - yet generalized - interest without the express intent of dating and without knowing how one looks like, thus allowing for friendship or compatibility to occur, which organically can turn into a relationship.
Plus, 4chan is full of homos.
I just want to find someone to be with and not be lonely anymore. But maybe I am asking for too much. I'm a NEET and I have no friends: I do try to take care of myself and appear presentable, but I can't deny that I seem to be stuck in a rut.
>>29781287
i'll be your bf i just have one condition and that is that you must have a vagina
>>29781287
I'm not a homo
Tho desu I only want one of them overly clingy girls
Yanderes pretty much
>>29781312
Sorry, Anon. I said it in the OP: I'm not a female.
>>29781229
>Be me today
>Decide to stay home from uni lectures because sick
>Decide to play vidya with some old high school friends, over skype
>Computer crashes
>mfw
And there's fucking more
>Be laying on the couch, playing the ps4
>Gf (inb4 ree) comes back to apartment from uni with her partner for an art assignment
>he's chad
>"Hey dude. Playing video games? Nice."
>I just nod and smile
>Gf: "Alrighty Paul just make yourself comfortable"
>Chad (Paul) goes into the fucking fridge
>Takes the last bit carrot cake from last night THAT I WAS SAVING
>mfw
>>29781486
>Takes the last bit carrot cake from last night THAT I WAS SAVING
I tried to stop him but he was already eating it. I'll hate him forever
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>sharing his 'problems'
Back to Facebook
>>29781486
She's fucking chad btw
>be the bestest insider wrestling fan
>practice all day and night for the day I can finally join the big(ger) boys (not WWE you fucking bitchshit cocksucker markfags, I mean glorious NJPW) on my bed (I nicknamed it the Tokyo Dome) with mumma as a practice dummy (hehe dumb-y it's because she's a stupid whore) although her workrate is pathetic compared to Bayley (Bayley if you're reading this please sit on my face)
>one day she says she's had enough (obviously of my sick wrestling skills (I can really do 5 whole flips in midair before hitting a Frog Splash!)) and says she'll buy me tickets to a live event if I stop
>this is my big chance to prove my self-taught Puroresu skills!
>cut to a day later mummy got dem tix
>they're for a WWE house show
>I can feel myself swelling up with anger but I decide to maintain my current GBP balance and not let my Bad Boy alter ego run amok
>we all have to start from somewhere, even if it's shitty WWE
>flash forward to the show, most of the markfag-bait matches are over (thank fucking gOD, I had so many bathroom breaks just to spite Shitler McHitler) and AJ Styles is about to come out against Roman (ugh) Reigns (ugh)
>break mummy's leash from her grip and waddle towards the backstage area spryly
>I need a costume!
>break out a spare pair of mummy's undies I always keep with me and put them on my face as a mask
>I am Tendieman, Eater of Tendies
>try to go backstage to jump Roman and establish myself as a dominant heel, (just like Lord Steen! Oh...a Good Boy can dream to be like him) but security guards stop me and drag me out of the stadium
>literally shitting and pissing my pants as I sob loudly and scream that it's unfair
>banned from all future wrestling events, even NJPW
>im so fucking angry right now. I'm going to listen to my What's New Scooby Doo CD and pinch myself to vent my anger
meh.
3/10 greentext. Not even the slightest bit believable, and the tendies eating manboy meme is pretty much dead now.
>>29781555
If this meme is dead then just call me the Meme Necromancer
>>29781555
Also I'm just trying to see how awful I can make one of these things turn out to be within a 2000 character limit.
Theres something about how sick and depraved these stories are that just make them so fun yet so terrible to read. Like a train wreck or something similar.
>Message qt on okc
>views my profile but doesn't respond
EVERY TIME. WHAT THE FUCK.
>>29781198
They are all just bots, catfish, and feminist bloggers.
>>29781479
Don't think it was a catfish, I reversed searched the pics.
Oh well
>>29781679
>reversed searched pics
Doesn't know pics can be stolen off the internet.
>over 17
>he's still a virgin
Literally how is this even possible in this day and age? How do you fuck up so bad that even though the most pathetic of men are guaranteed to have at least a girl or two to have crushes on them growing up?
>>29781138
Some people aren't very good at functioning socially or talking to girls. It takes more time for some people than others. Did you not know this?
>>29781138
I'm 18 and I've lost a lot of wait but I'm still working on it. All you have to do to not get school sex:
>be overweight
>be quiet
>be anyone but Chad
If I wanted pussy I could get some but it's not worth the effort
>>29781138
you get expelled and have to do homeschooling in high school, thats how
>tfw no kalayaan fighting, isda skinning, pelikula watching, diyaryo reading, kawal honoring, mata straining, tubig drinking, salamin shattering, eleksyon voting, kape brewing, mukha cleaning, daliri fracturing, kuko biting, tsinelas snapping, lamesa wiping, sapatos breaking, kotse fixing, itlog cracking, ilong blowing, ube chopping, puso racing, damit wearing, kumot weaving, puwit slapping, paa rubbing, buhok combing, ulo scratching, simbahan attending, parol hanging, kamay washing, tuko calling, jeepney driving, kanin picking, manok chasing, tinikling dancing, tiyanak finding, aswang hunting, kabayo riding, carabao herding, baboy wrestling, duwende stomping, lechon roasting, lumpia cooking, pancit making, sinigang eating, forest loving, /r9k/ posting, qtp2t filipina gf
>>29781094
bump of life for /r9k/'s longest running best thread ever
>tfw rumpa custerfooting filipina gf
feels bad right?
how do you learn to be happy with yourself
Accept your flaws and be conscious of the shit you don't have to deal with in your life. There's always stuff to be grateful for.
Years of growing up, maturing and surpassing your goals and expectations.
Alternatively, get high all day every day.
>>29781058
>>29781122
what the fuck is this gay shit
oreganook
>any argument with parents over any subject inevitably turns into father legitimately screaming at the top of his lungs that i need to get a gf
Not only have to deal with >tfw no gf, i have to deal with this fucking bullshit every other fucking day.
Is this normal?
No, he sounds like a dick, but then again, I have no context other than your own perspective.
Ask him to get you one.
>>29781085
there is no other context desu. Whenever we have an argument over any topic, it inevitably just turns into him angrily telling me that you i need to get a gf, most of the time raising his voice. I have a lot of friends who dont have gfs and i really doubt they have to put up with this shit.
