Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1794. page
- Home
- Board: /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
- Reading: Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1794. page
>some guys have no gfs ever
>some guys never get married
>some guys get a loving wife and murder them
why didn't he just divorce her
you can only give a woman so many black eyes before you run out of options, man
>famous actor
>Divorce
Maybe he didn't want half his shit gone
>>29202633
The old Irish sunglasses.
>it's a group project where you have to do all the work because nobody else wants to
Why was it always me?
>>29202558
>in school or work
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
>>29202558
fuck that OP. Drag your fucking feet untill people do the same amount of work. If you're in highschool then my answer is the same tenfold (high school doesn't matter)
This sort of happened to me on my last group assessment at university.
30% of marks is based on participation and teamwork. 26/30.
>"Anon, why do you never smile?"
BECAUSE IM NOT HAPPY YOU STUPID CUNT WHY DO YOU HAVE TO ASK ME THIS. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE ME SAY IT!!!!
>>29202530
Legit fucking this. Happens all too much.
oregano
>>29202530
way funnier when i read it as
>BECAUSE I'M NOT HAPPY YOU STUPID
>>29202530
because they don't know what else to talk to you about maybe??
i'm kind of a normie and whenever i see a robotic dude sitting by himself i can't think of anything else i'd talk to him about
>can't keep up with it all anymore
Guys, I'm scared of what it means to disconnect from here.
>>29202464
Explain and elaborate.
Also, nice Tom Waits.
Are you another Tom Waits fan?
Good taste.
Also, you can never leave, I'm sorry.
I'm going to post some comfy Tom Waits songs as I think of them.
https://youtu.be/DrxpOlL5z94
>sitting in pub with qt bf holding hands acrosss the table
>start examining the nails on my right hand, which I clip whenever he comes over so we can do butt stuff
>he immediately notices me doing this and does the look away/blush thing as he remembers why they're short
>start massagging his palm with those two fingers in the exact same motion I use to massage his prostate
>he knows exactly what I'm doing
>fold his hand into a fist with my left hand
>work those two fingers on my right hand into his fist, pushing past the squeezing pressure of his fingers
>he gasps and squirms in his seat
>immediately hides in his hood and puts onne leg up to try and hide his boner
And now the mental link is there so I can get him all flustered whenever I do that thing with my fingers while holding his hand.
>invite qt sub guy I'm interested over to my house
>he's super, SUPER self-conscious about his fetishes and being submissive, which is great fun because I can make him blush really easily
>somehow, I manage to coax it out of him that he'd like to try pegging
>intredasting.jpg
>wait I don't have my strapon harness or anything with me
>never mind, I have a cunning plan
>few hours later
>I'm sitting in an armchair in front of the fire, he's sitting on my lap curled up against me, we're watching generic shit on TV and swapping stories of drunken misdemeanors
>while telling a story, I nonchalantly slide my hand up the back of his thigh, making him immediately freeze and look at me like, 'oh god what are you doing not sure if want'
>I carry on with my story, and start gently caress his taint with my fingers through his jeans as I talk, making him writhe and sigh in my lap
>he asks if he can close the curtains, I say sure, as soon as he's done so, he takes his jeans off, saying they were 'uncomfortable'
>lmao yeah right you massive slut
>he comes back over to the chair, and as soon as he sits down, I grab him, forcing my thighs between his so I can spread his legs and hold him helplessly against me while my hand creeps back up his inner thigh
>I start to stroke and tease his hole through his boxers, making him hide his face and moan, because he loves it but he's SO shy about loving it
>after ten minutes or so of tormenting him like this, I say, 'right, I think it's about time we took this upstairs.'
1/3
>shy demure boy, turns out he's a masochist
he's really cute and lets me dress him up like a doll and paint his nails when we hang out
>one day he's lying on his stomach reading some manga or some shit and his butt is right there
>r i g h t t h e r e
>have grabbed his ass before but usually as a 'hahah gotcha!' at the end of a hug
>cannot resist
>must spank
>he yelps and goes 'ah-'
>do it again
>squirms and pouts at me and says something like 'knock it off'
>pin him down and apply five more
>i am in ass smack heaven
>his butt is perfect
>flawless shape, soft
but firm
>'do you really want me to stop?'
>'y-yes!'
>he isn't struggling at all though
>take pity on him and tell 'all right, you know you just have to tell me and i'll stop'
>stares at me, bright red
>'... really?'
>'yeah, really, i just thought you liked it because your reactions were cute. sorry if i scared you.'
>'... oh. then stop.'
>'sure!' back off, hands up, go back to reading
>he's still squirming and blushing for a while later but i keep my promise
>relax and resume chilling with the other peoplle in the room, who were reading/giggling/ignoring us
>he calms down and seems really happyhe had bee bullied when he was younger, so I felt bad, but, also felt kind of pleased because I got him into the habit of telling people no and putting his foot down.
>that ass tho... unf
>>29202431
>lead him upstairs by the hand, he has an idea of what's coming next and can't even look at me, he's so embarrassed
>I push him down on my bed and tell him to wait there while I file my nails
>go into the bathroom to file my nails (and to lowkey give him a chance to think about the fact that I'm gonna do things to his butt and decide whether he is okay with that)
>come back into bed with him, pull him into the little spoon position, and talk him through what he's feeling right now, check he's okay with me doing stuff here
>he is very okay with it
>alrighty then game on
>I check the nails on my left hand again, file a couple of rough points, and pull a latex glove, making it do the snap thing because he's still refusing to look at me but I know he'll hear that
>he looks at me look a frightened deer as soon as he hears the snap, and is even shakier
>an idea occurs
>'I know you want it, but I also know you're feeling super weird about wanting it right now. How about I tie you to the bed so you can struggle and pretend you don't want it so you don't feel so weird about wanting it ?'
>he still can't say anything, but he nods, so I tie his wrists to the head of my bed and kiss him as if I'm leaving for Syria before getting to work
>lube up index finger, start to very gently push it inside him, he's tight as FUCK but I have small hands and a lot of lube (also, gloves help!)
>he literally cannot handle how much he likes this, he looks almost as if he's going to cry, but he's moaning and mowing his hips so after checking he's definitely okay with this, I carry on
>hmmm, one finger is okay but I bet I can get two in
>remove finger, clean off glove a little
>I stare into his eyes and make a huge show of lubing up the second finger so he knows exactly what I'm doing, staring at my hands with a mix of apprehension and anticipation
2/3
Who is your favorite professional gamer?
>>29202329
5 dollars OP gave this cunt money.
>>29202329
>not korean
I dont think you know the real definition of 'professional' gamer.
>>29202329
w0000000t this girl has some big breasts xd
so where is the anon who invited bay area anons to his birthday party at UC Berkeley? not working currently, so I can attend
surely someone must be in touch with him
>>29202321
I'm in north bay and sent him an email and got nothing back. I expected nothing less from an anxious beta.
Hey I used to go to berkeley a year ago
Didn't realize so many autistic robots were there, but it's not shocking in retrospect.
I wish I could go back to school IMO, even though I had no friends I could just fuck around and shitpost all day and not have to do wageslave shit.
>Sleep for 16 hours
>Day's pretty much wasted already
>>29202305
You have something important to do during the daytime? Why are you here?
What were you gonna do anyway
>>29202305
well you should be well rested, for a good few hours, whats stopping you from doing what you wanted now?
"Women can't be forever alone" - /r9k/
>This is my cousin Hallee. I'd like to tell you a little bit about her... First off, she is a beautiful young woman-both inside and out. She lights up a room with her smile.Hallee is funny, sweet, caring, smart, an athlete, a jigsaw puzzle champion, a wonderful student, and a best friend to all. Hallee is an amazing person-a person I am proud to be related to. She is also a person who just happens to have Autism. She has never let that small detail define who she is as a person-which is why I refuse to use it as something to describe her. A fun fact is that Hallee's Birthday is fast approaching! And this is where I have a favor to ask of all of you....
>Below is a picture of Hallee last year at her 18th birthday party. She had been so excited to have a party with her friends. She wanted to go bowling, have fun, and eat cake and Ice Cream. Invitations went out to her classmates at school and to other friends in the area. Hallee sat at her party anxiously waiting for her friends to arrive so they could have fun....but Hallee's friends would never arrive. Not a single one. Below is the picture of her celebrating alone - eating her birthday cake. My cousin is a beautiful young woman who will always have the mind of a child...so as you can imagine, she was heartbroken and beyond sad. She was hurt...
>>29202286
That actually breaks my heart. Fuck, there's so much sadness and misery in this world.
>>29202336
I want to date her and make her happy.
>>29202286
18 year olds think they are too old for parties like this.
They want nightclub-type of parties with booze and sex and no parents around
Who /formerlystraight/ here?
I got so tired about hearing of the bullshit with women that it fucked my mind and made me a fag.
>>29202243
Thinking about it I had been a fag for long, 4chin just helped me to accept it
>He says while posting a tumblr image
jej
>>29202243
my bf Tyrone makes me feel like a little girl :3
You have ten (10) seconds to point out even ONE (1) flaw in the attached photo.You CAN'T.
Lorde is literally,L I T E R A L L Yperfect.
the person in the photo is white
>>29202231
She's a self-identified feminist
>>29202231
Her man face, she's got smegol eyes and could stand to pluck a couple hairs from her eyebrows because it just further emphasises her bulging beady eyes and square broad bone structure
>mummy and daddy arguing over financial troubles again
>anxiety attacks because we might be forced to sell our McMansion
>will probably have to end up moving into some shitty area with poor people
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
inb4 ;
>get a job and help your parents!
My parents already said they will NEVER take money from me, and that it's their problem, not mine.
>>29202226
Sent from me to you
>>29202226
I've had parents who constantly fought over money too, the only difference is that we've always been poor. Poor people are pretty much regular people who are more practical and rely less on superficiality. We also don't understand charity.
I've heard some women say this regarding the desirability of lesbian sex, since the woman knows a woman's body.
Is there some gay manifesto that really makes being gay sound desirable that would persuade me to be gay? Any good pics or videos?
>>29202176
prostate stimulation is often compared to the "g-spot" in women, presumably then with the right prep you can experience the same pleasure a woman get s from a large negro.
>>29202250
Oh I'm familiar with prostate stimulation
>>29202250
Does this correct prepping involve taking hormones and cute dresses?
>neet
>everyday literally the same, bored out of my mind, nothing seem exiting anymore
>browse internet and 4chan for hours everyday looking at dumb shit
>try to change my life every now and then but invariably end up failing every time
>months pass by like its weeks
Anyone else in the same spot?
Yeah I get that feel
The only reason I notice time passing is because anime airs seasonally
>>29202159
time is relative, you guys, theres nothing wrong with the neet life
i dont understand why you guys think its depressing
>>29202201
>i dont understand why you guys think its depressing
It's probably because we all have depression
hello r9k, my heart is aching and my eyes hurt from crying so much.
feels thread, preferably about good happy moments of your life to cheer me and others up but you can also share whatever feels you want.
carbs are the best feel
>>29202144
an original thank u
>>29202127
You still here OP?
[original comment]
