Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7866. page
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If this guy can get laid, why can't you?
>>24730987
>Be doctor
>Natty gains
>nice car
>big house
>JUST FUCK MY SHIT UP HAIR
He's a 7/10. Notice her fake smile? She's with him for the cock carousel or the money.
Cuz im a manlet .
>>24730987
He's a fucking dentist
I'm a NEET with zero prospects of ever doing anything
> what does a gf feel like?
Like bags of sand and warm apple pie
salty coins senpai
A bit like obligations
None of this is real.
The past 17 years have just been a very, very long nightmare.
Tomorrow I'll wake up and it will still be 1998. I'll still be in my childhood hometown, in my childhood home. I'll get out of bed, eat breakfast, and go outside to wait for the school bus. It will pick me up and drive me to my elementary school.
During recess I'll play Pokemon with my friend. I'll help him catch Mew and tell him about Missingno. At lunch, we'll talk about all the wild video game rumors we heard on the Internet, and wonder if they're really true.
When I get home, I'll watch some of my favorite TV shows on my favorite TV channel, YTV. I'll watch Pokemon, Dragon Ball, Animaniacs, Beast Wars, Freaky Stories, Dexter's Lab, Stickin' Around, Rugrats, and others. I'll then go on the family computer, look up game cheats on the Internet, and play Jazz Jackrabbit and DX-Ball 2.
Then I'll go to my N64 and play the new Zelda game, Ocarina of Time. I'll get immersed in its world and have hours of fun adventuring as Link. Its environments, themes, and music will all resonate deeply with me.
Finally I'll go to bed, eager for the next day so I can wake up and do it all again.
And I'll be happy.
It isn't 2015. It's still 1998. I'm just asleep, that's all. It's still 1998.
None of this is real.
>>24730803
You wish nigger
>>24730803
>tfw childhood was shit and adulthood is much better for me
>tfw can't relate to nostalgiafags
>>24730803
It's turning 2016 next month. Strengthen the delusional, get gud, or an hero. It's whatever and up to you or something.
>wanting to be a kid
There's no greater woe than reminiscing of joy in times of misery.
>used to talk to this guy on the internet, met him on 4chan
>always knew him as the pic on the left
>years go by and I see him on facebook after logging in for the first time in forever
>he's now the guy on the right
Does anyone else feel strange when they think about how they don't truly exist as a human? This guy is only a year older than me but has been so blessed. I've barely strugged to survive in whatever miserable way I could.
Living as a non normie is scary. Its like everyone has been dumped into a jungle of life and have to find their way to the other side. The normals get a map and are allowed to follow well worn trails, some of them might get into a jam here and there but its smooth sailing for the most part.
Then you have abnormals which are left in the thickest part of the vegetation with not so much as a machete or torch. You can't even see the sun and don't know what way to go or what you're even traveling for.
Then you get killed by a jaguar.
>>24730785
>Then you get killed by a jaguar.
I wish.
>>24730785
The way he wears his fucking belt
>>24730928
I guess some things never change.
In a college dorm, bored as fuck in the middle of the night. Taking the first three dubs to do random shit around my dorm. OP will deliver.
Go mischief mode and ruin their life
Piss in the hallway
is there overhead lighting? take out the bulb
>Cuddled with a girl for the first time today
>Seeing her again soon
W-what do guys?
Obviously just shoot urself with a shotgun
BE FUCKING HAPPY REEEEE
Seriously though just experience how nice it is
Describe in detail so I can live vicariously through you
>tfw tranny
>tfw cashier at a busy store
>tfw every day men and women alike call me petnames. Sweetheart, doll, darling, dear, etc etc
>tfw genuinely like interacting and seeing them smile when i smile and laugh at my mediocre humor
>tfw got that cutehl girlboi privilege
post you
I wanna see
>>24730550
yeah, pics
>>24730565
Unsee cc/tedamuri/
How do you scare a normie in the wild?
What's some tactics you guys use?
Sometimes I literally just be myself.
>>24730346
>shit in pants
>remove pants
>throw soiled undergarments at normies while screeching and puffing my cheeks in display of dominance
>tfw normies are so scared they call the cops
>tfw I am alpha supreme
>>24730502
are there more subtle ways of outsmarting a normie, almost like treating them like a retarded stepchild?
>>24730346
>just be myself
I can say it works. I was told by people multiple times they are afraid of me because I'm far from normal. I don't mean spilling spaghetti everywhere I'm just distant from the normal life. I never drank any alcohol (OMG), never had sex and don't want to (a-are you a p-pedo?) etc
>23
>missed out on college dorm experience
JUST kill me
>>24730220
It's shit. Those mattresses fucking blow, the furniture is ass, and having a roommate means you can't masturbate before you go to bed
It's pretty bad desu
>>24730220
you missed out on teenage love too :^)
>tfw missed out on college roomate
>tfw missed out on hanging out all the time and going out on adventures
>tfw missed out easy sex
>tfw missed out on crazy parties
>tfw just commuted for 6 years without making a single friend or having sex
Cryogenic sleep when?
I'm a 6"2 white american male with brown hair and blue eyes thiner build (not lanklet) iv had sex with 4 girls over 3 years and I have 33 tinder matches am I a chad? (I lurk on r9k and often relate to robot plight
Real Chads don't have to ask
LEAVE
kekeke
>>24730138
So no :) I don't wanna be a Chad
>Hey kid, you alone here?
>>24730097
>tfw cute cosplay gf
>>24730839
I am literally retarded and forgot to insert the word "no"
This is an unrealistic scenario, I don't leave my house.
Sad music for those lonely nights.
https://youtu.be/Qg9CHTAOFtM
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ypiV-WgIUgY
Just gonna keep putting my favorites here. Hopefully it brings you as much relaxation as its brought me over the years. This is from a pretty unknown band. I really enjoy them though. Thier singer has a beautiful voice. Also let's keep the hatred out of this thread please.
thanks for the music anon
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HdbOWR2GsLU
This is another one I love. May seem a little odd when you see the artist, but if nothing else the chorus really speaks to me, plus it has a nice mellow beat.
> KV for 23 years
> two years ago borrow some carmex with cousin of questionable hygiene in retrospect
> have big swollen cold sores every fucking year since
> for cold sores to be so "common" I never see anyone with one
> dumb bitch workmate will likely have a kek my expense with the other officekeks, has been lookung for a reason to look down on me
> just got one tonight after 14 fucking months of worrying and ultimatelyn forgetting about it
FUUUUUCCCCCKKKK
Is there anything more JUST than cold sores?
>KV
>various bits of luck and circumstance come together to give me a chance with an attractive girl
>the day before things happen get a breakout
Absolutely diagusting pic
>>24729868
Absolutely disgusting. @ that image
rs is best
is this bot safe
>playing shit games
>current year
>that one kid in middle school who convinced you he was Zezima and made you beg for gp
He was a Chad too
> Be me around 4 years ago
> Like little boys in very inappropriate way
> Like most pedos, bought into bullshit ideology
> "12 year olds are much more intelligent and mature than society gives them credit for
> "As long as the kid consents and is okay with it, there's nothing wrong"
> On the deep web being bad
> Everybody is like "we love children just as much as everyone else. We hate people who actually abuse kids, but if the kid consents it's not abuse"
> Me buying into this bullshit
> Someone points out how the most popular video by far was of a little boy begging crying and begging for it to stop
> Almost everyone there had fapped to that shit
> Everyone is all like, "Well yeah we don't endorse *actual* child abuse, but we're human. We slip up and make mistakes sometimes"
> "We still care about kids tho"
> Start seeing through their bullshit.
> Start seeing fantastic mental gymnastics at every turn
> Disgusted with myself for being like these sick fucks
> Wipe computer clean, resolve to get better
> haven't looked at that shit in years
> Still look at cartoons tho. That don't hurt nobody
boys are icky
I wish there was a boy version of Candydoll so you can be happy.
>>24729106
There is a boy version of Candydoll
