Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2900. page
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>bf is away for work over the weekend
>Go out with friends to a few bars and clubs last night and get really drunk
>Accidentally made out with one of his friends
Should I even tell him? I want to just get it over with but I think he might kill himself
>>28583673
Faggots always cheat on their partners, surely he already suspects this.
>no girls on the internet
>ACCIDENTALLY
I know this is just a shitty, lazy troll thread, but the whole "accidentally cheated" thing never fails to make me laugh.
So OP, let me get this straight, you tripped over something, fell onto one of your bf's friends, happened to have your mouth open, locked lips with his friend, then was in so much shock that you continued to move your lips and tongue against his? Is that how it happened? Total accident, right?
>>28583673
I know this is bait, but how does one accidentally makes out with someone?
Why are most people shallow and materialistic?
because it takes too much time to look in depth at every decision you make/every person you meet when you can learn everything you need to know at face value 90% of the time
>>28583626
lts easier
Because of capitalism, status anxiety and advertisement
Short: Jews
>tfw will never be a cute girl
>tfw will always be a fat ugly NEET who will never be loved by anyone
I loathe myself.
>tfw will never have a husky
>tfw will always be alone and just have husky plushies
>>28583599
As long as you can be cute while posting anime girls it doesn't matter.
>>28583599
>tfw tranny
>tfw transitioned young
>tfw kind of bored of it
>in too deep to go back
>boobs too big to hide
>too short with small frame thanks to stunting puberty
>hips that make me walk kind of funny
>dick too small and doesn't work
whoops
how do you guys manage staying in your room for several days?
I am a robot and basically socially retarded, but I can't for the life of me stay in my house for more than one day. After a day I start getting this suffocating feeling, like I am about to fucking die unless I leave my place to get some fresh air.
Open the window?
You're an extroverted, claustrophobic pussy. Go hang out in the park with your friends.
>>28583592
>i am a robot
>after a day i get this feeling
Huh? What makes you think youre a robot? We spend weeks and months inside. Some here even years because somebody does groceries for them
have you found your purpose in life r9k?
i haven't
Yes. To serve as a warning for others and their children how not to live your life and to make them feel better about their mental capacity.
Yes. Getting dough.
>>28583726
i was thinking of this but how do you get that message across?
>she uses the doggy snapchat filter
>she tells you that plenty of guys have jerked off while texting her so it doesn't matter if you do it
WHAT WAS I THINKING
>She openly talks about her sex life
>>28583400
This bothers me so much and I don't really understand why. It's just seems so fucking obnoxious that every girl uses it.
This is to all the virgins here. Normal people don't need to read or reply to this.
I'm gonna be 100% honest with you okay. You're all a bunch of creeps. I hate to break it to you but if you're over 20 years old and you've never had a girlfriend it's probably your fault. Face it there's no hope. Contrary to what you losers think the world is actually a pretty fair place. If you're a virgin it's probably your own fault. You're probably some kind of school shooter, creep, rapist, weirdo, pedophile, stalker, or repressed cereal killer and the girls can sense it. Girls can sense these things man. They can see the red flags. Just look in a mirror lol. No girls wants a loser. They'd rather smoke weed with an alpha like me who can take care of them. You're being screwed out of that normal human experience and no one cares. Go kill yourself. No one will cry or miss you. You probably won't even get an obituary. Go cry. You're creepy, you make women feel uncomfortable, do the world a favor okay.
tl;dr You're screwed. No amount of intelligence, dedication, or hard work can salvage it. You'll never even land a fat ugly chick. It's called genetics which you don't have. You could be a millionaire and girls would still reject you because you have creepy genetics. Stay away from are women.
>>28583379
>Cereal killer
Fucking 'tard
>the world is a fair place
>you can literally die in child birth
>you can be born ugly
>you can be born in a poor country
>you can be born with aids
>you can randomly get cancer
>you can get randomly shot and die
Yeah bro, just be yourself, the world is a fair place bro.
>>28583408
>not killing cereal
Those smug fucks, in their boxes, soaking in milk.
"if he can get a wife so can you. You just lazy and pathetic."
Why do normies say all this bullshit. Sometimes things just don't work out
.I'm living proof of that. Why can't they accept it?
>>28583349
The picture you posted disproves your point op
No I'm saying luck also plays a part. That guy got lucky. Not everyone who looked like him would end up married with kids. I put in a ton of effort. Lost weight, dressed better, changed hairstyles, tried online dating send 100's upon 100's of messages, even to single mothers, divorced women still nothing. I'm just saying things just don't work out no matter what we do.
Luck is a huge part, there is no denying this. You have to be at the right place at the right time, with the right look, and the right thing to say. Its almost like fate.
Is there anything worse than being a short male?
It's the equivalent of being a morbidly obese female.
tall female is suffering too
>boys too intimidated to talk to you
>cloths never fit right
>can never feel small again like you did as a little kid
>everyone always makes jokes/points out your height
I'm only 6'0, my sister is 6'2 and I feel so sorry for her
>>28583246
I'd say tall females are equally worse as obese ones.
>always chestlets
>face looks manly
>goofy movements
>usually no ass
>>28583246
I don't talk to tall girls because most of them have a complex where they want to feel small and want a guy that's even taller then they are by 3 to 4 inches.
Now that kissasstorrents is kill and the piratebay has little to no content what torrent site do you use?
>kissasstorrents is kill
>piratebay has little to no content
wew, quite the statements.
>>28583208
Hold the fucking phone. what?
Private ones.
Well, lads, looks like they got Wojak as well.
What now? ;_;
>>28583185
Tbf, wojak has been a normie thing for a while, they just sort of forgot about it.
It was used in rage comics all the time
We abandon ship
They're defiling our memes :(((((
So why did you apply for this position?
CUZ I NEED DEM DOLLAZ
to keep getting those unemployment bennies
I'm really passionate about not starving to death.
Is my girlfriend white, /r9k/?
>>28583101
She's ugly, that's for sure.>>28583101
>>28583101
That's a really well made love-doll. Where did you get it?
>>28583127
Better than nothing I say
I NEED YOUR BEST PICK UP LINE, PRONTO
Hey baby, wanna chance my sedimentary cock, to metamorphic cock, and finally an igneous cock ;)
>>28583066
They say Im full of myself so I decided to share some with you.
Never tested tho.
>>28583066
Girl are you a parking ticket, cause you have fine written all over you
Who else wished they had taken up a trade instead? I chose to get educated cause I thought it was superior, and it would make me wealthier. Now I realize academics is a masturbation marathon, where you write "scientific articles" in various journals. And the only ones who read them are the 3-4 people in the world who has the same specialty. And they only do it to disprove you. If only I had taken up a trade. Anything, like a mortician or even a masseur. I'd start my own business and make lots of money.
Fuuuuck!
It's still not too late to pick up a trade.
>>28583069
Yeah, if you could do it before getting an education, why can't you now? If anything, you should be in a better position to start a business. Unless you live the USA and have 100k in student debt to pay off, in that case you're fucked.
>>28583069
The damage is done though.
