Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7606. page
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Its a big goal of mine to eventually be able to have an entire bowl of cereal in my foreskin. I routinely stretch and inflate my foreskin in an attempt to achieve this goal.
Anyone have a similar goal or dream?
Pic related
Anon I don't know if this is real or you're just memeing, but I found your post interesting enough to merit a reply in the hopes that another might happen upon the thread and continue posting.
>>24953558
I can delve deeper into my fantasy?
Would you care for me to make more illustrations?
>>24953632
dubs says yes pls
ITT: Robot songs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bAJ_74tDZzU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oALoQQjqQuU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NR7_TbMIVnA
Have a full album of comfy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUVmcKcTZ4A
"meaningful" lyrics are for failed normies and LinkenParkfags
>>24953559
>he doesn't care for lyrics in music
How is it like living with autism?
>ywn convert Anzu to Orthodox Christianity and marry her
>swn be your pure and lovely Christian wife
I want to die...
>>24953457
>convert
>implying you need that in order to get together
I doubt she gives a fug about religious affiliation, just become a Chad and go meet her.
>>24953457
You retarded slav or byzboo.
>>24953457
She sure is a beauty!
Is marriage always a lose situation for men?
>>24953446
No. In some cultures you can marry 16 year olds and that works out ok.
>>24953456
Hell, not even that long ago in America you used to be able to marry lolis. It's strange how things change.
>>24953456
A-are they virgins senpai?
Should you have all of your cIasses spread out, say 1 hour apart each, or should you put them all together so you can take one after another and be done by noon?
>>24953443
one hour gap is the worst. no time to do anything except wait for class. 2+ hour gap or back yo back only
>>24953525
you could review for the class or something in that 1 hour, couldn't you? Wouldn't that be useful?
>>24953548
Lol you're rarely, if ever, going to want to do that enough to actually do it
>tfw at your annual checkup and the doctor tells you you're totally healthy ... except for being overweight
Bitch, if my BP and Cholesterol are good, then mind your own fucking business.
Don't be mad, they just want to make sure you don't self destroy yourself even further, tubby
>>24953346
Those aren't the only health concerns. For instance being fat contributes to fucking up my breathing when I sleep.
>>24953346
It's his job to tell you how unhealthy you are, you "health at any size" lardass.
>tfw locked in a room with no windows 24/7
>sexually abused twice a day on average
>can't do anything about it because i will literally be killed if i leave
who's life is worse than mine
>>24953265
>on the internet
>can't do anything about it
Wow, no wonder you're only used for sex, it's because you're retarded.
Twice a day?
You lucky bitch. I'd settle for once a week.
>>24953265
That's pretty hot tbqpt
>I really like you anon, but i just can't have sex until i'm married i'm sure you understand :)
>>24953218
thats fine i can feel you up though right?
I would 100% be okay with this. Unless she's been fucking Chad or something before me
>>24953218
If she actually means it, then nothing wrong with that.
>age 1 - 10: nothing
>age 11: met a girl my age through parents job. she asked me to kiss her in the back of her mums truck one day. puberty hadn't kicked in yet. I kissed her on the forehead and acted like i was glad to get it over with.
>age 12: nothing.
>age 13 - 14: Mum kept on making me go to school dances with some 5/10 from another private school, she was clearly not into it. Mum made me wear very formal clothing that didn't fit to club style dances. Girl's friend was quoted as saying "i'd go on a pity date with anon" out of context
>age 15 - 16: Started to pick up. Chatted with a lot of girls from other schools, was your cliche le so randum XD child. I was friends with a bunch of stacys, in a msn group chat they were making fun of this other girl at their school who wasn't as pretty as them and considered "weird". They said I should add her as a joke. I did. She was so genuine and funny, she wasn't as pretty but I fell in love with her pretty quickly, we began to date in secret by my request, a typical day would consist of us playing steam games, browsing 4chan, eating cookies and watching TV shows while cuddling. We took each others virginity but it hurt her. Throughout the 2 years I cheated on her every chance I get, mostly with girls from other schools, but one time with her best friend right in front of her at her house. She cried and said she hated me, I felt so bad but puberty is fucking crazy. I let her punch me but she never forgot or forgave me. I had a lot of sex during these 2 years but I was still an asshole. She cut me off, as did all the stacys after they found out.
>age 17: nothing, no sex, no girls.
>age 18: Apologized to her, we made up, dated again, was faithful to her, she cheated on me with her drug dealer. She changed so fucking much. I knew I deserved it but it still hurt, karmas a bitch. Broke up again.
age 19: nothing, no sex, no girls, no friends
>age 20: nothing, no sex, no girls, no friends.
>>24953140
goddammit OP you disgust me
you even type with a tone like you want pity or something
>age 1-20: nothing
>age 8 or something
Sat in the back of the nativity play kissing the girl playing mary, shit was cash
>8-17
Nothing
>literally yesterday, 19
Had my first kiss, was good
>1-8 nothing
>8 made out with girl up street on a dare
>10 random week long gfs who i held hands with
>10-17 dryest of dry spells
>17 get first legit girlfriend, fuck her.
>20 break up, spend year in emotional devastation
>21 meet girl at work and start dating
>22 she dumps me for my friend so i start seeing HIS ex for a minute.
>22 start dating girl from out of town
>22 go back to first gf for a couple months
>23 meet girl through mutual friend, start dating around this time last year.
>24 my problems with alcohol make her break up with me in september.
>start casually seeing girl, she's heavy into drugs. doesn't work out.
>start seeing another girl, also doesn't work.
>talking now to my last ex and how ive sobered up and we should give it another shot.
>girl on snapchat wants to fuk
it's been a fucking whirlwind since 20.
What drugs/booze do you got on you right now in your stash?
I only have some kratom. I'm gonna go to the store to pick up some DXM soon. I need to wait to get some money so I can get some MXE, 3-meo-PCP, etizolam, and some booze. Then I'll have a proper drug stash.
What a fucking loser
Do something else with that money. Don't you feel fucking ugly doing that shit?
>>24953092
Suicide is faster desu
Currently in the collection:
MDMA
Weed
DXM
Heroin
Xanax
Adderall
Ritalin
Kratom (if that counts)
>>24953159
Oh yes.
>make long, edgelord post on normiebook about wagies being fucked by their capitalist masters
>assmadwagiesinthecomments.jpg
>take b& and reply to rustled chads, normie and Stacie
>unironically call people silly wagecvcks, post comfy smug NEET pepes, retort with comebacks like "tick tock wageCock sleep time. You have work early tomorrow. Mr. Shekelstein needs Shekels for his polished new Yacht" and use greentext to quote them and refute their arguments in the comments thread
Ahh Wagies, they truly never learn...
Samefagging like a fiendhi fbi
WeRollin Rollin Rollin
Blox
>>24953199
Congrats!
Next Dubs decides OPs white elephant christmas present
Anybody else ever had a dream that made you really sad when you woke up. Last night had a dream that was so good and so real that when I woke up I felt like complete shit.
Had dream of being in a relationship with a child hood crush and had that chemical feeling when you're with someone you love but when I woke up I realized that won't ever happen because she lives in a different state and now has a child
>>24953069
Had a dream that I was laying in a field with my oneitis. I had my head on her lap and she was rubbing my chest as we looked into each other's eyes. Woke up and the power was out and I was the only one in the house.
I have those dreams every night. I've had them every night my whole life. Nothing I could ever do in life will ever live up to my dreams.
>Just go to Philippines, Cambodia, Thailand etc with some money and you can live like a king for the rest of your life.
Is there any truth to this meme?
Nah it's all about Greece now, buddy.
>girls will literally suck your dick for a sandwich
Considering that the only thing they care about in their culture is money, then yes.
But unless you have a six figure salary, forget it.
>>24953059
it is too late now
Who /master of the kitchen/ here?
Baking a cake. What is r9k's favourite baked goods?
>favourite baked goods
Potatos.
>>24952837
>Potatos
Can't even pluralize it correctly.
Confirmed potato
>>24952824
>Entire family worked in/owned restaurants
>Caught on to the trend, worked in several bakeries and pizzerias
>Can make a mean Cornish game hen, toss some garlic mashed potatoes and sauteed vegetables on the side if I'm not grilling up some marinated pork
>Breakfast omelettes are commonplace for me
>I still regularly eat dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets for lunch
How obsessed are you with Rose?
>>24952721
>How obsessed are you with Rose?
Epi tier
>>24952721
Rose? Not at all /Rose/? Very.
I was there from the beginning
