Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2791. page
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Hey guys so minor update you may vaugly remember me as the guy that hung with that model who was stringing me along? 50 bucks for nails? Mom called me a pussy?
Well, after like a month I am going to a swinger party, I do those. I had even quit masturbating because after a failed threesome with a couple last week, I took action against my dick not working fully outside porn and fapping. So anyway, almost on a whim I text her to see if she would like to go to a swingers party saturday night. (I brought up the open bar) She and I quote went " Oh yesssssss!!! Bihhh yessssss!!! Lol "
I tell you I literally got heart palpatarions I thought I might faint I was so arroused. Not like in the dick sesne dick wasnt hard but like psycholgically excited beyond concept. Think the Wew Lad guy fused with the HNNNG guy, insane.
So the night of I get there before her, have some fun, dick still aint responding but I fap a bit with the condom on and lube inside like the net said, didnt really do much, though I did get a boner WITH A CONDOM ON while eating this chick out, PROGRESS.
So I get a call that she will be there in 30 min, so I put my clothes back on, nervously preen in the bathroom and then go get here.
She literally asked
>So what kind of party is this
>A swinger party
And she like had eyes as wide as saucers, she noted she kinsa didnt even notice the swinger bit.
She gets a little tour, watches and says "I'm not particpating,"(thats what all the first timers say). Via...somehow this part gets foggy. I get her in the dark room( a room behind a curtain with like zero light a bed[that I failed to get her on) a little closet area and space) and we start necking and I suck her tits like I have done at times then in I watershed moment a guy next asked if he may and he actually got in on her other nipple.
This goes for a bit, and then I leave and feeling okay again, I take off all my clothes, (I keep the boxers though still wary of going full monty)
I sit next to her, and we talk she is awestruck and said " is it bad that Im not particpating I feel awkard" I said its no pressure do what you want long as you ask and when she said ir again, said "a footrub counts"
Cue me rubbing her feet as I did in the past and then going for some sucking and body rubbing, similar to what we have done in the past but when her foot rubbed past my dick shit was on.
I got an awesome footjob was hard as insane, (even though she really just rubbed on top it a bit, I was so fucking into her ...)and then it just went buck, I was sucking on a tit but another guy wormed in from the other side. Nigjt progresses a bit and I am getting blown by a dude while necking her and feeling and sucking her tits.
Then this hot as hell asian chick shows up and they just go at it. Tit sucking fibgering, it was like scrabble, her at the center and being touched by three folks who were being touch by others and so on. Asian chick cums like a rocket right into her body while I am feeling and sucking on lime three different sets of tits altenating, necking rubbing just insane. That scene ends and I swear I was in a trance I felt I might pass out shit was like cosmic, space oddest shit, and all this without me evening cuming, like having the hotteste chick you ever knew someone you have been obsessing over for 4 years, in a fucking sex pit with you. INSANE.
Ms Not Particapting chokes a dude while being pegged, kisses and rubs all over me while I am having my prostate worked,I necked with her in the dark room standing up in like a seven person bisexual fleshpile. By the end of the night sje fucking was grabbing my head and putting it on her titties and other womans titties as well!
If she wasnt on the rag shit would have gone nuclear.
At the end of the day.Staxies gonna stacy so in addition to paying the 40bucks for us to get in. I dropped 20 on her gas, ten in her pocket and like five on roling papers. She also left after seeing my new apartment that was funny enough right down the street. (She wanted to bounce at like 12:45 even though party ends at 2, she still got her tiities sucked by another dude before she left, while I was in this standing sex fleshpile getting blown while sucking on everything I could) . There is another event next week she for sure is going with me to(and she noted she would be off the rag then, multiple times to me)
So at the end of the day
1.Still didnt nail her
2. Didnt get past second base with her
3. Didnt orgasm
4.couldnt stay hard in a condom and so could not fuck anyone
5.Could not get her to stay
Yet I feel like such a fucking winner?
Why?
>>28574251
op, you enjoy getting cucked.
love, mom
/b/ here
wow you guys are pathetic lmoa
/sci/ here
you're a brainlet lmaof
>come to /r9k/
>think everyone here is pathetic and start attacking them
>over a period of time slowly start to relate to robots
>now a full on robot that despise girls and is seriously considering assualting one
>>28574036
Why does this kind of shit make me laugh so hard
Do people actually believe the blood in your body is blue? like, I understand a small portion of our species is mentally defective, but that shouldn't account for such a large goof an gaff our population has obviously succumbed to.
3/10 bait made me reply and post an original comment
>>28573904
Yes people do believe that.
>>28573904
I think a while back people thought that blood became blue when it was devoid of oxygen, which is why it turned red when it was exposed to air.
this belief came from arteries appearing to be blue while veins are red
i think this belief was so popular at one time it appeared in textbooks
>>28574855
how the fuck is this bait anon
who creep here?
i scare people and i don't know why. i don't stare, i'm never impolite, i just don't say very much. i can't even pinpoint what's giving some people that impression, unless they're the ones that are insecure because i'm not babbling about facebook to them.
Yes i am like this as well.
Onahole
>>28573832
>onahole
what? haha
I know what you mean exactly.
You just look ugly and creepy that's all there is to it sorry. Combine that with the fact that you're a quiet person and you're fucked.
I'm in the exact same boat.
how do I cure myself of my yellow fever?how do I get rid of my disease?
>image.jpg
Hello Bebe. Delete this thread
>>28573772
hey bebe
i look JUST like a aesthetic kpop star
what u think? u like?
>>28573814
Bebe?huh?
Why are women so fun to look at?
Just listening to women speak and do normal stuff makes me strangely happy.
Is this gynocentrism?
Women are magical mythical creatures that no robot will ever touch. I'm just glad I live in the 21st century where lots of erotic pictures of women are available for free
>>28573685
>is this gynocentrism?
No, it's totally normal, just means you're desperate.
Women in any context but a sexual one make me sad, uncomfortable, and irritable.
>three people are mowing lawns
>faf has the TV up so loud i can hear it on the other side of the house
>he's watching "reality" programming, like fishing shows and now a show about hillbillies looking for gems in the rocky mountains
>it's hot as fuck
>no airconditioning
>fan is noisy and ineffective
>kids next door are yelling and screaming
>a bird is making noise outside my room
who else
>just want some peace
here?
>>28573291
put some fucking head phones on and shut up
deprivation chamber for 5 hours. you will either evolve or kill yourself after. the kind with water though , the pod
>>28573719
Make sure to drop a handful of acid first
ITT: Things you hate
>at a restaurant
>everything on the menu has le quirky names
>Make a thread
>One guy posts out of pity
I'll have a coffee please
>We only have gourmet espresso with fancy names and toppings
Does it come in plain black?
>What size we have 5 different sizes
Regular.
Like just a plain black cup of coffee please I don't know why restaurants like to make that difficult.
>decide to quit 4chan
>next 8 hours spent on 4chan
Okay. New rule. If you missed out on prime teen pussy, you get to have heroin. Or codeine. Something. Just, if your life's been fucked that hard, you should be allowed to be stoned fucking whenever. To have a person end up like us and not even give them anything to take the pain away is fucking monstrous.
i agree
normies thinking giving us alcohol is all we need
fuck you normies it's not enough give us the good shit
You didn't "miss out", you're not good enough. There's always gonna be teenage girls. Just shut the fuck up.
>>28573179
it won't make you feel better anon
>Job applications in 2016
Stop applying to shit jobs
>>28573176
Just answer like a normie would answer it and you pass. Don't do it truthfully unless you're a dumbass.
this is target isnt it
why do so many robots like this album?
The fuck is this 2013?
gtfo with this shit
>>28573167
>"All I know is pain, survivin' on my own"
>>28573167
because it's good
Do you want to be a normie?
I used to be one back in my high school days. I miss it, they were happier times.
>>28573024
No I actually despise the normie life there's no way I would want to live life so unaware of my surroundings and incapable of critically thinking about anything, I would rather die a neet
>>28573140
How do those traits equate to living the normie lifestyle?
who /wistful melancholy/ here? Not being incredibly angry or completely despondent, but like... vaguely yearning for something unexplainable?
>tfw dont live in a happy and bright world with people who love me
>instead I'm on this ball of shit called earth
>>28573020
that's not wistful melancholy
earth isn't that bad
Yes
But it is counterbalanced by the fear of my own uncertainty
But yes, please, I need something so different now
>fell for the "calories in, calories out" meme
>lost a fuckton of weight
>now I'm an unsightly skinnyfat mess with tiny baby muscles
You are supposed to exercise also bruh
>>28572965
Better than fat.
>>28572965
You didn't read the sticky faggot. If you had been lifting that whole time, you'd probably be a level above skinny fat with all those noob gains.
>i turned 20 today
>now i'll never have teenage sex with a milf
this is really fucking with me /r9k/
>>28572908
20 isn't even old.
I'm 24, prepare that it won't get better.
>>28572956
20/24 what's the difference, my age still doesn't start with a 1 and i'll never fuck a woman whose age starts with a 4 ( ._.)
Your being immature right now, you can still have sex and it's totally your fault stop fucking complaining
