Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 820. page
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my penis is 6'5 inches but just now twice I experienced a diamond hard red pulsating semi uncomfortable 9 inch erection
what is this why is it happening is it perminent
this only happens to me when I am going to have sex or the porn I am watching is so damn hot you just get beyond hard. otherwise it's not that big
op here
actually more like a 8inch and a bit erection
its a lot thicker in the middle tho
see a doctor and not ask people you dont know on the internet.
Who else here /suicidal/
ITT: we talk about our plans and experiences with suicide
How did you get a picture of my eye?
I came up with a plan to wage slave it up for the next 4 years (I'll be 30) and take a trip somewhere with good hookers and drugs, have a good time and then off myself in the bathtub of my hotel when i run out of money.
any suggestions on where i should go?
>>29663056
Your mom is pretty affordable.
I mean, you won't have to deal with the dickrot she'll give you once you're dead.
Stay home, eat tendies, heroin maybe, bang your loose mom, live that life.
My sister treats my mother like fucking shit, sneering at her all the time, calling her stupid, bossing her about, what do?
My dad won't say anything, if i say anything she'll go fucking mental cos she's a fucking nutter. I can't fucking deal with it anymore, fuck with anyone but not my mum :(
>>29662876
Tell your sister to fucking cool it? Grow some balls. I'm telling you, telling women off is a GREAT feel. It makes you more confident overall.
What's she going to do? You're probably bigger than her, you can probably kick her ass.
>>29662916
yeah i'll usually tell her to leave my mum alone but i dont lose the plot with her because she'd go psycho and "you can't hit girls". can't deal with it anymore, my mum's the best
>>29662876
My sister is the same way. :( Idk what to do about it either. Once I told them to write letters to each other and read them since they can't talk without arguing. My sister gets so wrapped up in HOW my mother said something without working out the original problem. I've been thinking about sitting them down and I'd be moderator and I'd go through every issue with them, money, fighting, ect.
Anyone else see the irony in this? Every post you click this.
>>29662875
Hahahaha wow Op, funny stuff.
>>29662875
No, explain it to me in depth. I'm kinda slow, newfam.
>>29662875
You're the smartest man alive. Everybody here has never noticed that literally every time they've posted, nonstop.
Give yourself a round of applause professor fucknuts.
This is the story of Michael, the ugliest boy in town
>tfw my names Michael
SHUT UP
>>29662841
Did he live in a hole in the ground?
>>29662841
I fucking hate that retarded youtube show, how is it so popular? It's like the david lynch films of youtube shows, it's just a bunch of disturbing non sequiturs with no point to them.
ARISE
AWAKE
OR BE FOREVER FALLEN!!
Theres no god here...unless you've brought it with you
>>29663083
You must grow stronger.
>>29663805
Indeed. touche, hero
>be me
> listening to a music playlist on youtube with no earphones
>suddenly i hear the sound of rain over the music
> get real excited
>fuckyes.jpeg
>get up look outside window
>no rain, just pure sunny day
> it was a ad from some other tab
> tfw you live in California
I was really disappointed, I love the rain
>>29662571
>can afford to live on california
>still complains
true, true.
but I miss the rain
>live in cali
>liberal as fuck
>smoking weed in public, in the clubs, and in front of police
How can east coast compare? Even Biggie wanted to go back to cali
What's a nice place to waste my time away on the internet?
I feel like I don't fit in here, there's too hate, and I can't work up the motivation or energy to hate anything anymore.
>>29662562
too much*
desu
>>29662562
Stay dry, pupper
Try reddit, it seems more your speed
>>29662630
Reddit is full of shistains, it makes me want to hate but I don't have the energy to call them out.
What makes you angrier? That you'll never fuck her, or anyone like her, or that you'll never been as rich and successful as her?
>>29662517
Neither make me that angry desu
>>29662517
>you'll never been as rich and successful as her
Just you watch. I'll have my revenge on normies. I'll have the last laugh.
Neither. I just want a gf desu. I don't care about her.
Why do you Canadians ONLY eat this brand of popcorn???
I've literally never seen a single Canadian eat a different brand of popcorn, it's always this shit.
Because it's the best?
Smart food white cheddar is also good and prevalent
>>29662840
Uh no?
Pop Secret is the best microwave popcorn brand, you pleb.
>>29662450
Its god tier popcorn anon. Can't compare to actual movie theatre popcorn, but nothing can.
>tfw you had to do girl push-ups in gym class
>tfw could never pull off a somersault in gym class
>gym group has a quite fat guy
>fatso is allowed to do easier moves
>fatso leaves the class, can't remember why (maybe to toilet or he had some appointment)
>some guy asks the teacher why the fatso can do easier moves than other students
>teacher tells to the whole gym class that his heart couldn't take heavier strain
If it hadn't already happened earlier, this propably was a social murder of the fat guy.
How can someone not even do one normal push-up?
>tfw torn on buying a $150 tacticool edgelord knife, an onahole and dildos, or something else
What do I do
Get the knife
you're going to need it
>>29662320
Onahole and dildos
Just because I can't get them doesn't mean you shouldn't. Get those sex shots anon. Maybe one day I'll get some too
>>29662344
Has the time come?
I am looking for some immersive/ comfy vidya to play on steam
+1 for cheap/ free vidya
>inb4 poorfag
Vampire Bloodlines the Masquerade for an amazing story and immersive atmosphere.
Dark Messiah of Might and Magic for the funnest combat in vidya history.
Morrowind GOTY edition with some mods for an extremely detailed, unique alien world that you can lose yourself in.
All of these games are pretty cheap right now, Vampire Masquerade and Dark Messiah do take a little bit more work than most steam games to get running but look up an online guide and once you do it you'll realize it didn't take that long and it's definitely worth it.
>>29662272
this one pleasse
>>29662272
Mad Max was pretty comfy
>driving aimlessly for hours at a time
>enemies can't even keep up with my upgraded car
>don't even have to use weapons because fast car
>driving through the dunes at night
Got me into a nice comfy mood.
dance my roaches, dance!
your master needs entertainment...
;)
>>29662264
Shitpost king!! congratulations.
>>29662391
fell right into my trap
;)
>>29662531
you know upon reflection, I think you've won this round.
Were you a robot from the very start, or did you start out as a normie but gradually/suddenly became a robot for some reason? Just what the fuck happened? Give me your stories.
I was a somewhat weird but still social normie kid, regardless I was able to maintain many friends and social circles in my early childhood with no real problems (I still retain some social skills due to that).
At the age of 12 I had to move out of my town due to reasons, but already knew the kids from the new town because I went there for vacation often.
I'm able to create and maintain a new social circle, with no problems. About 5-10 close friends.
At age 13 a major incident occurs, I'm still not entirely sure of what it was (had something to do with an outsider who only came during the summer influencing my friends behind my back), but basically I end up losing ALL of my friends in the town. I did nothing to them, they didn't speak to me, they typically only ignored or laughed at me. Remember I was close friends with them literally just days or weeks ago.
I try to go out to social events but I feel like I'm excluded, despite of what I tried to do. This was basically THE moment in which I became a robot, at age 13. I lost all the will to go outside, don't want to interact with people, and basically become a semi-hikikomori that only goes out for school and can't trust anyone at all anymore.
In school I only pursued good relations with my classmates mainly because I didn't want to feel completely excluded and turn into a target of bullying, but due to physical distances between our towns (kids from several towns went to one same school) or a lack of willpower I'm not able to connect with them outside of school. Result? Once I graduated, I ended up having zero contact with any of these kids.
So here I am, a 21 y/o KV robot mainly due to one fucked up incident I still can't figure out. I can't trust anyone, don't leave the house and the future is completely grim.
No one with any stories around?
FUCKING GET IN HERE REEEEEEEEEE
the fact there aren't any other posters is proof THAT THERE AREN'T ANY REAL ROBOTS ON R9K ANYMORE!!!
you cucks GET THE FUCK OF MY BOARD
>story iscoming
