Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 404. page
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>Tfw awful voice
How do you fix this R9K? I'm tired of sounding autistic.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0BFB6Jm6u1Y
>>29843279
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0BFB6Jm6u1Y
have you tried getting of the hormones?
>>29843279
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0BFB6Jm6u1Y
are you gay? you kind of have the gay accent going on. no offesne intended, robutt.
>>29843279
Bit of a gay accent, also stop doing that clicky thing in between words. Youre still salvagable
Ughhh... I just started my period. Now I'm stuck inside all day.
I have too much smegma building up in my labial folds. :'c
>>29843197
>sex
>pee after
>uti anyway
mfw
>>29843197
Hey femanons, do you mind sharing any of your degrading experiences with Chad Thundercock lately?
Come on, don't be shy. We all know that you gals like to be slapped around by Chad. Give us the details!
Who here /hillaryclinton/?
It's becoming hard to find anyone who supports liberal values on this site anymore
=(
>>29842944
I didn't realize liberal values equate to leaving americans to die, lying to the public, having a list of deaths tied to you and your family, illegally mishandling classified information, taking bribes, abusing the woman card, being a literal racist and supporting your husband regardless of his long history of sexual harassment and abuse.
>Implying Im not hated by both democrats and republicans because I'm usually half and half when it comes to the issues they argue about
Hillary is the last person to support liberal values
>tfw no kalayaan fighting, isda skinning, pelikula watching, diyaryo reading, kawal honoring, tubig drinking, salamin shattering, eleksyon voting, kape brewing, mata straining, mukha cleaning, daliri fracturing, kuko biting, tsinelas snapping, lamesa wiping, sapatos breaking, kotse fixing, itlog cracking, ilong blowing, ube chopping, puso racing, damit wearing, kumot weaving, puwit slapping, paa rubbing, buhok combing, ulo scratching, simbahan attending, parol hanging, kamay washing, tuko calling, jeepney driving, kanin picking, manok chasing, tinikling dancing, tiyanak finding, aswang hunting, kabayo riding, carabao herding, baboy wrestling, duwende stomping, lechon roasting, lumpia cooking, pancit making, sinigang eating, forest loving, /r9k/ posting, qtp2t filipina gf
Happy to see this thread again OP
>>29842734
nigga i set my watch by this thread
cheers
>>29842734
>sapatos breaking
wtf?
It's Saturday night. Post some humiliating school stories. I'll go first:
>7th grade dance
>all my friends are getting grinded on by junior high pussy
>haven't grinded all night
>girl makes a passive compliment in my direction
>ask her to dance
>she says "no"
>guy in her vicinity laughs at me
>I feebly choke him when he turns his back
>He punches me in the face
>Teacher saw me getting punched
>Start crying my eyes out due to embarrassment
>Everyone sees
>The kid explains what happens
>end up getting in trouble
>Mom picks me up
>She's clearly humiliated
>I cry the whole way home
>Freshman year, high school
>Me, girl, and two other guys talk about 9/11
>girls says if she was in a situation like that she'd have sex with whichever guy is there
>I audibly gasp
>get boner
>they laugh at me
>Next year, I have another class wit her
>haven't seen her since the incident
>she says "get away, creep"
I haven't been normal since
A weird ass story that didn't even happen to me but I gotta tell
>high school senior year
>kinda robot friend (male) is a fucking chubby chaser because he thirsty as fuck
>fat ass girl two years behind us wants his dick
>it's break time
>he's into her class' room and we're all there
>bitch puts him in a chair and starts lap-dancing for him
>the fattest bitch you ever saw
>all the buddies cheering
>the fatass has some bizarrely professional looking moves
>I just leave because the vision is too much for my head
>go to our class' room
>another friend arrives saying "If I could unsee some things I would..."
>>29841649
>Dating a girl in hs for about three months, she's of the popular crowd and i'm of the weird but interestingly autistic crowd
>I was in a band with my best friend
>lots of people were into her but somehow i piqued her interest, idk why
>we don't fuck but she sucks me off/ lets me play with the titties
>dump her with no explanation
I didn't want to tell her it was because she believed in the healing power of crystals
>my best friend is dating her closest friend
>suddenly he has no time to hang with me pr practice despite upcoming gigs
>multiple times bails on arrangements we had to hang
>when we finally do get together say he's been hanging with his gf and my ex a lot
>le smirk
>"She said you had a small dick dude."
>suddenly an explanation for all the looks i've been getting at school
>suddenly realize she's been turning my friend against me by exploiting his ego and manipulating his gf
>She broke up my fucking band fuck
>alone for the rest of high school
>mfw my dick wasn't even small, we never fucked cause it wouldn't fit
TUMBLING DOWN
U
M
B
L
I
N
G
D
O
W
N
It is really astonishing how shitty he looks for his age. His body and face are completely wasting away and he's only like 22.
>>29842312
He's gunna do it...
Is no one going to stop him?
I don't understand the obsession with this guy.
So robots, none of us have gfs, but all of us want them
Say what if one day something happens and you get one. How would you treat her, what would you do with her, what would you talk about, would you take her on dates, what would you and her do for fun besides fuck?
bonus
>what is the coziest thing you can think of with her
>describe your ideal life with her
>describe her in all ways
put my dick in it
>>29840713
>Say what if one day something happens and you get one
become a nervous wreck becuase i have no idea what to do now and my disinterest in most things would probably make her not want to be with me anymore
and thats why I dont bother with tfw no gf. rarely think about it nowadays
>>29840713
Cyborg here.
Shes just a mate, i treat her as i would a guy but behind closed doors we fuck and cuddle and kiss. outside nothing more than a lad mate really.
Would anyone like to join a Rabbit room filled with fellow robots?
We will be playing videos and listening to music.
It's a free to use room that doesn't require you to sign up.
It can hold up to 25 people.
Here's the current room:
https://rabb.it/michael.13.36
Here's the future replacement room:
https://rabb.it/ComfyRabbotRoom
ANTHEM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep_WIFJrCJM [Embed]
Press LD at bottom to go to HD and bottom right for text chat. No mic or cams allowed.
Here's the /r9k/ rabbit skype group:
https://join.skype.com/FTjiTTR78cGw
because you're not doing anything better m8 ;_;
Additional rules: http://pastebin.com/JPanEMdZ
wew flimflamily
we're cats now
We're working on making rabbit even better. Be back in a little while
> only six inch cock, three nches flaccid
> no big cock means I'm single or cucked for life
Kill me now.
>>29840082
Pic related isn't me, just what I aspire to be...
I'm less. I only recently noticed I don't have a bulge and because of that it looks like I don't even have a pens. Do you put something in your pants to create a fake buldge?
>>29840082
>six inches
>small
You're retarded, it's honestly a great size.
LIFTING WONT GIVE YOU A GF
I
REPEAT
LIFTING WONT GIVE YOU A QT3.14
>>29839580
It helps with the initial attraction, no?
thats ok. i dont see how that matters.
i dont change who i am so i can get some flappy piece of meat jumpin all over my dick. what do i look like. a cuk?
I'm an ugly bald cunt yet I've had girls come on to me simply because I'm ripped, it's literally the only thing going for me and it works
>tfw the boypucci so good you realize roasties have it bad.
>>29834875
sauce please :)
commentus originadus
>>29834875
Butts honestly aren't that amazing desu.
With a vagina you have a wet tight muscle that grips your entire penis from the base to the head. An anus just grips at the sphincter and the rest is just a warm loose hole.
>>29834967
you're kidding, right? that's what wikipedia says, sure,clearly you just got your info from there. pussies don't even feel that good, takes hundreds of strokes to finish in one. assholes are tight as fuck. vaginas don't grip your cock? maybe i just haven't come across a tiny girl with a boa constrictor pussy, even though i've had my fair share.
>you're clearly a fucking virgin
latinas thread?
why are they so hot?
>>29834182
The Native American genes
I really don't feel attracted to any other race as much as latinas
>>29834297
I know that feel, latinos are pretty much perfect.
Harangue
one English word
Philogyny
>>29825176
haberdasher
I NEED HELP THIS GIRL IS SO CUTE! IM FUCKING AUTISTIC IDK WAT TO SAY NOW!
>>29824023
Ask her what she's doing
>>29824023
u kno da dril
>>29824023
SHE IS THE ONE ON THE RIGHT!
>tfw sexual marketplace is so fucked you have to be above 8/10 to fuck non fatties
Why
>>29823884
Does it make you insecure? Or were you like that before?
Fuck a fattie. Not TOO fat but fat. Its nice. If they have a cute face you'll forget everything else once you are turned on.
>>29823884
Its gotten to the point whete you gotta be 8/10 to fuck fatties too.
Fatties are lucky men can sexualize anything a woman can do or be.
