>be in my cousins house
>he has 2 girls (7 and 12)
>be in the living room
>I was showing the 7 how to play a flash game on the computer
>the 12 comes in wearing very short shorts and says" what are you doing?"
>I was shitting on a chair while the 7 was sitting on another chair next to me
>the 12 leans over the computer trying to see the game
>she was uncomfortable so she sighed and just sat on my lap
>she was arguing with her sister to play the game while moving around on my lap
>tfw
>I would have never imagined that I'd react like that because I'm not into kids let alone my cousins
>I rapidly get her off my lap then get out of the room and head to the toilet
>I had to hide the raging worm
>I can feel my boner like a chained American ham planet trying to reach a hamburger sitting just in front of it
>I just sat in the toilet in disbelief
>I kept repeating to myself that I am not a pedo and started repeating warhammer quotes until the beast calmed down
>I returned back to the living room with a clear mind but keeping away from any physical contact
Guys, I am into big tits and big asses, but why did I have a Boner? Wtf was that? I am confused
>I was shitting on a chair while the 7 was sitting on another chair next to me
You lucky fucking bastard
You should have told the older one to suck your cock or you'll hurt her sister.
>>25114715
>wahhh wahh I'm crying because a girl in short shorts on the cusp of puberty physically stimulated my cock and I became erect
Why are Americans such pussies?
It was just a boner dude Jesus Christ you didn't even do anything to her.
ITT: SFW images you have fapped to
>>25114695
OP pic related
I usually fap to sfw.
>>25114716
I like pictures with some kind of story
>I hate people with aspergers syndrome
>>25114626
>aspergers
>people
choose one.
>>25114626
aspergers syndrome is an old meme
>>25114779
but i'm pretty sure they are a part of the human species desu
I'm a Chad (or enough of one that you faggots would call me one) out at a bar with my friends watching the Jets game. What's up robots
Nice try, the Jets are the most omega team in the NFL though. No way a chad would watch them.
Why are you on [r9k] while out with "friends"?
Why are you not confident enough to take a picture that looks like you aren't hiding the fact that you're doing it?
>>25114588
>straw
Once you get the girl's number, how often are you supposed to text her? What are the fucking rules of this game?
Wait 3 days before texting her the first time.
As for texting normally you take twice as much time to reply.
If she texts you back in 10 mins, text her back 20 mins. If 3 hours, 5-6 text her back.
Its up to you anyways
>>25114551
She texted me first on Thursday. I kind of texted her today but it didn't go anywhere. Do I wait until Monday to try again?
>>25114551
This guy knows what's up.Don't ever make an exception to this, either. As soon as I did she stopped talking to me.
Who /streetwear/ here?
h-how do i get into streetwear?
>>25114473
>implying robots ever leave their room.
/fa/ is the other way
>>25114473
>>25114994
who /cityboi/ here?
ITT we trigger robots and ugly femanons
This one destroys my self esteem because Im a guy
Eat less fatty
>>25114362
I have better six-pack, the problem of robot is in the brain, and in the face too
tumblr landwhales killed by small/curvy qts yet again
>I have a vore fetish
>I'm a furry
>I killed a man once
>I'm a sex offender
>I'm a ftm/mtf tranny
Why the hell is literally everyone such a complete monster?
>>25114327
>TFW you're none of those, just ugly and autistic
>TFW that is enough to make you a monster
>>25114366
Yeah and everyone attractive has at least one sick, nasty secret or open secret that's a total dealbreaker.
>>25114327
Humans are people, and people are kinda fucked up. Maybe you should just learn to deal with some of the shit instead of looking for perfect lil cinnamon rolls to fill your world.
Hi, What are some /r9k/ approved anime? Please list the most depressing ones. Thank you.
>>25114307
What do you find depressing? Actually sad ones or ones that make you feel like shit because you'll never experience what the main character has or the romance in a show.
Elfen Lied is an original recommendation.
>>25114346
Any anime that you guys want to recommend that will make anyone cry and depressed or feel sorry for the characters.
Less than an hour until I find out if I win the lottery today.
Or some other amount of money.
Or nothing.
I only spent $11 on lottery tickets for today and yesterday, a major improvement to moderating my gambling addiction.
>>25114276
>the longer you gamble the less likely you are to make your money back
>>25114276
And I won $9 tonight.
Thats a single dollar ahead of what I spent on the Super Lotto and Powerball draws. I will probably use it to buy 3 entries for each game next wednesday.
gee, sure hope no one else wins that powerball jackpot so I can still win $222 Million by Christmas!
Who here /cuckold/?
>>25114230
who here /can'tfinddecentbisexualporn/
Best way to find a cuckold couple?
>>25114320
you have to be a nigga with a big dick
if you're on r9k you most likely don't qualify as a bull
Isn't it kind of weird how /r9k/ of all places is shaping the internet as we know it?
One second this place is just a humble little abode and the next second pepe is a huge mainstream hit and people outside of 4chan are using terms like normalfag or normie. How did this place of all things start to attract mainstream appeal?
faggots who spend months cultivating twitter accounts full of real people itt
>>25114134
I wouldnt say it's them coming here. It's the one or two normies that either overheard something or came here once. They appropriate our culture because it's all the edge without the feels. They don't struggle and they use our memes out of context and turn them into trash.
>>25114187
don't forget that this little chan of mine is full of famous people too
>>25114211
woah there buddy no need to get heated
>wagecuck logic
why are wagecucks trying so hard?
>>25114082
Every wagecuck believes he is a temporarily embarrassed millionaire. They all think they will someday "Hit it big" and become the big boss in the big chair.
Pretty pathetic imo
>>25114107
this and that and like this and like that and this and that and im like this
Wageslave here.
I like owning nice things and my hobbies are expensive
>tfw too normal to be a robot and too weird to be normal
ITT: We say cuck
Only newfags can't say cuck
Just cuck my shit up
cuck my shit up
newfags can't kek xD
>>25114056
FREEDOOOOOM TO CALL KEKS KEKS
>Hi uncle anon! Where's your girlfriend??
who the fuck gives a 4 year old a gold chain
you can tell her parents are sicko pedos
I'm looking at her.
>>25114054
fuck, beat me to it