Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7641. page
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>Chad friends keep trying to get me a girlfriend
>they are former bodybuilders/strippers
>literally tell me to just be myself
>literally tell me to just be myself
Yeah dude, no shit. Here's how this goes:
>Option one, you fake an attractive personality
>Meet girl
>1/10 chance she's into your (probably obviously) fake-ass self
>Find one who likes the act, you go on a few dates
>As she gets to know you, there's this general feeling of unease. She knows you're hiding something
>Luckily, being mysterious is fairly attractive
>But unfortunately, you can't fake it forever
>Sooner or later, you break down and start acting like yourself around her
>Mystery is gone, you're no longer the (fake) person she was attracted to
>She dumps your ass
>Option two, you be yourself
>Meet girl
>You're a sperg, so it's not likely that she'll be into you
>Meet another girl
>Rinse and repeat
>Eventually meet girl who likes you for you
>Keep her for as long as you like
The real problem is that you're most likely someone with nothing to offer a potential mate and an unpleasant personality. Go to the gym, volunteer at shit that interests you, work on making yourself a nicer and better person, and leave this godforsaken cesspool of a website for a few years until you get the urge to return and laugh at how pathetic everyone on here still is.
>>24925478
OP, ignore everything this motherfucker is saying. What you actually need to do is be yourself if you were someone a woman with even a semblance of standards would sleep with, which means lying through your teeth. If you want to get laid you just need to get good at that, it's really not that tough.
>>24925478
>>Eventually meet girl who likes you for you
>Silly things that bother you even though they shouldn't
>when people say "is because"
Now I'm not an English major, so I can't say with 100% certainty that this is syntactically incorrect, but I when I was taught rhetoric and essay-writing, we were strongly persuaded not to use it.
When you really look at it closely and say it out loud to yourself, it just intuitively sounds weird anways, doesn't it?
>"The reason [blah blah] sucks is because [blah blah blah]."
It's inefficient and un-eloquent to start a sentence with "The reason..."
It's much more fluid and refined to start off with the subject.
>"[blah blah] sucks because it [blah blah blah]."
Much nicer, isn't it? Remember this next time you are conversing/writing.
The reason I made this thread is because I don't like the phrase "is because." ;)
>>24924790
Thanks cutie ill remember this when writing my 50 word essay due in two hours :'(
>>24924790
>Silly things that bother you even though they shouldn't
when people call me a faggot and tell me to kill myself
Second one is better but the first one is also correct. "because" is also an adverb
What are some fun things you can do with a GF on a date?
My heart breaks every time I see a picture of her. She's getting fucked by turkish chad while I will never even get to pleasure my eyes by looking at her in real life.
>>24924786
Finger her
Take her to a romantic spot in the forest
Kill her and hide the body
In this thread, we talk about our health problems and help others to shed light on why they're having these problems.
My symptoms
>on and off aching in my hand leg and arm joints
>strange numbing prickling sensations that flow over my whole body and head. It seems to be triggered by different things, and it causes goose bumps and cold feelings. It's not painful, it's almost pleasurable in a weird way.
>problems digesting anything with diary or gluten
>seem to be allergic or sensitive to most foods and environments
>very very high pain threshold
>people say I walk strangely, I step on the front of my feet first instead of landing on the back
>extremely sensitive to light and sound
>naturally have very low amounts of apathy/sympathy, but am not autistic
>I have started to have simple partial seizures/auras. And I believe I am also having them more frequently in my sleep. But, I haven't had any full blown seizures yet.
>I have never felt well rested after I sleep and I am never able to sleep for very long.
>I have very very long and vivid dreams. I can't be certain, but it seems like I dream for the entire time I'm asleep.
>>24924778
>Also, when I lie flat on the ground or sit, it feels like the ground is shaking under me. Or like I'm swaying back and forth. Even though myself and the ground are both perfectly still.
Ear aches that the doctors are taking forever to help me get fixed, I have a shitty heart I can feel it beat fast a lot, it's starting to hurt whenever I laugh or cough.
>>24925081
Did you have chicken pox as a kid?
How do I find girl?
>24 years
>never had gf
>beta and ugly
>shy
Go outside and look for one
don't bother. dating market is inflated, just like the real estate market.
>>24924629
you arent emotionally mature as she will be.
>tfw its finally time to sleep
Feels good man
Who else /LovesSleeping/ here?
From the moment I wake up its all I look forward to, I have some pretty dank dreams tbqh family
>>24924407
being asleep is pretty sweet
being in bed but not exhausted, trying to fall asleep, alone in the dark with my thoughts, is goddamn terrible
>>24924407
i really enjoy dreaming, especially when i stop smoking weed for a few days and they get really vivid
Anyone else hate dreams?
I just want to rest, I don't have time for this pseudopsych garbage messing with my head.
>was going to stop drinking for the night
>thought about how im unattractive to women
>pour another drink
Just stop the pain lads.
alcohol doesn't stop the pain, heroin does.
>>24924410
Needles scare me.
The pain is all in your head. Find something that will occupy your mind other than alcohol or drugs.
DESIGNATED
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_peUxE_BKcU
>>24924325
DEFECATING
>>24924398
AVENUES
>indians
>civilised
>home alone
>hear a noise on the other side of the house
Ur fkin ded lad
>doorbeII rings
>phone starts ringing
How do introverts meet up?
Killing themselves
>>24924511
woah boy, that's some heavy shit you're spitting
They don't
If they did meet up, it would just be quiet the whole time while everyone sits around or some shit. Introverts need to die desu. Me included
Guys i need to take out someone who is bigger and stronger than me and has MMA Experience
How do i take him out before christmas?
buy a gun and shoot him
>>24923960
burn his house down
Find a nice restaurant within a reasonable distance between you and him. Contact him and tell him you would like to take him out for a nice dinner. Hope he says "yes".
Me: white guy, raised in China
Never met a white girl my age until age 19
Now can't talk to white girls or look them in the eye because I find them intimidating
Is there hope for me?
Also I speak with a Chinese accent so I'm pretty sure everyone laughs at me -_-
im laughing so hard at this thread op i hope it's real
>>24923952
Went to a bubble tea place last week to be around Chinese people but everyone thought I was making fun of them because of my accent
So yeah I can't even make Chinese friends now (they were all Taiwanese anyway)
>>24924148
practice on changing your accent
I just finished my first semester at college and I have made minimal friends and have yet to meet any nice boys or even kissed/danced with one at a party. Whats wrong with me and should I just give up and accept the fact that I'll be alone forever?
You're probably not good looking.
Wish I easily passed my first semester. Wouldn't have changed it for friends or sex desu.
I'll most likely have to reapply.
>>24923807
How do I compensate for that possibility?
I want to fuck that slut nyanners
Not only is she a sjw now, but she's pretty ugly too.
If she keeps the blunt bangs I'm right there with you
>>24923851
yeah thats a good look for her
Would any robots be interested in a Skype Reading Room Call? There would be almost no talking, only a hello when you drop in and perhaps mentioning what you are reading. Any actual discussion can go on in the chat but the primary purpose would be to not feel alone reading.
bump for hope, bump for hope
why don't you just go to a library
reading..READING?! this bitch ass nigga wants to read words on a paper AHAHA ..da FUCK wrong with this nigga.. im out getting bitches in da club an this nigga gon read the bible an shit
