Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6693. page
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holy shit ISIS caught filthyfrank, now the faggot gonna get what he deserves
>>25341785
whats wrong with filthy frank
Stop getting my hopes up, faggot.
>check his twitter
PRANK'D
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FUCK MY LIFE /R9K/ FUCK
>Today
>Finally build up the courage to get a haircut at a barbershop
>Repeat CHAD BARBER SHOP
>Don't wanna go to Great Clips because they fucked my shit up last time
>My mom gives me 20 for a cut
>Go in and immediately regret it
>Literally Tyrones and Chads everywhere
>They all stop and look at me for a second as if I killed somone
>As I sat down, these two little Tyrone were making fun of my shoes which were New balances
>Eyes start to get watery, sweaty everywhere
>Feel a panic attack coming in, just numbness everywhere
>Suddenly
>"Yo bro, ready for your cut?"
>One of the Tyrone barbers calls me and gets me a chair
>"What kinda cut you want bro?"
>Tell him I want a Mohawk
>"Ok bro np"
>As he's cutting my hair my eyes get fucking red and watery from all the anxiety
>It was like one /r9k/ vs a whole army of Chads
>As I feel spaced out the barber asks
>"So how's your family doing?" >"How's the wife or gf doing?"
>Say "Oh *ahem* *ahem* they're fine
>I said this despite being a 25 year old kiss less virgin
>Suddenly get the urge to pee
>FUCK FUCK FUCK
>Too beta to ask for bathroom since barber is on the phone while cutting my hair
>Have an idea on just pissing my pants a little and then leak out the rest when my cut is finished
>As I start to pee, I noticed I can't control my bladder
>I can feel the piss going on the barber chair
>Chair is leather so my pure piss is also leaking on the floor
>"AYYY SOMONE IS PISSING ON THE FLOOR"
>"WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK"
>Barber notices the piss is under the chair
>"Bro did you take a leak? Get off the chair quick"
>Everyone is fucking looking at me in disgust
>You could tell it was me because half my pants are soaked in piss
>He sees the leak
>"What the fuck man, why did you do this"
>Stay still but now eyes are tearing and face is red as fuck
>"Uhhhh Uhhhh Uhhh"
>Drop the 20 bucks and run the fuck out
>Start crying and run to my house
>Realize he didn't finish my cut so I'm stuck with a half shaved head
>>25341685
Holy shit, dude have you never heard to take a leak before you go outside? Also why do you not go to those italian barbershops in the alley? They're always discreet and silent while giving a cut. Anyway thanks for OC
>>25341789
>actually thinking this is a real story
Anyone with social anxiety that's going for their haircut will have about 5 pisses before for the nerves.
Source: me
>>25341685
Awesome memes, guy. Kill yourself.
>decide to work on my backlog a bit, I kinda struggle with it and at best it gets bigger by day
>Spice and Wolf, pushed that infront of me for ages actually
>Love the setting and everything
>Ep. 4 where Horo talks about not wanting to be alone anymore and how she wakes up alone
>heart broken, illusion of being able to "handle" the loneliness is shatterd from one moment to another
>remember why I don't work on my backlog
The loneliness is tearing me apart. I don't think I would be able to finish it. The emptyness after finishing a show is already hard enough. I don't think I can take it anymore
>>25341681
I feel ya anon. Just read the LN. You'll feel better, I promise.
Here's a Holo
>>25342518
Thank you, im drinking beer and keep watching
![tumblr_inline_nt0vwfxruj1spsojg_1280[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/HYMSKg0.jpg "tumblr inline nt0vwfxruj1spsojg 1280[1]")
I wish I was never born so I wouldn't have to face my inevitable death
>>25341669
Death is just the next step in your eternal existence.
Stop being a pussy, because things only get worse from here.
>couple of years ago
>have my first gf
>she cheats on me with my best friend i'd known my whole life
>dump her
>skip forward to last month
>different girl who everyone knows im extremely close to and have a romantic interest in
>been really close with her for six months
>same guy as before emotionally manipulates her into dating him
>when they go to parties he doesnt drink, and then he starts touching her a lot
>tfw he used to be my best friend
just fucking end it all robots, the only two girls i've ever been that close to both left me for the same guy.
>>25341603
That guy is like a shitstain detector. Stay the fuck clear of anyone that associates with him.
>>25341648
thing is i've never told anyone else about this stuff, so they all think he's great. I also dont think he realises how much i hate his guts. I haven't said a word to him since he started making moves on the second girl.
>>25341791
I can only speak from my lacking experience, but my advice is to simply avoid that social circle alltogether. At least when it comes to any potential gfs, if you cannot bring yourself to ditch them, at least keep the two worlds separated
Lately I feel like life is just a joke that only I fell for. I cared too much about everything. never did anything much to improve my future though. I am pretty confused.
>>25341602
you are confused. if you cared about your future, you would've done something to make it better. You didn't, therefore you don't.
>Live on a shitty farm
>Have a giant spiderweb outback with a pretty looking spider who minds its own business
>I name it Charlotte because I have a shit imagination
>I occasionally toss Charlotte a fatass bug just for lols
>Sit out there on my phone and text
>One day a bee flies up and stings my knee after a long and drawn out fight scene
>I crush the bee and watch it twitch and spasm as it desperately gasp for breath
>It stops moving
>I scoop it up with a red solo cup and fling its battered corpse onto the web
>I swear the spider looks at me and waves
>Charlotte crawls over to eat the bee
>The bee comes back to life and stabs my friendly spider
>I watch Charlotte die on her own web, betrayed by me
>You were expecting a maymay, weren't you?
>No, I just sat there and watched her die
>I felt terrible for some reason. It was just a spider, but it was my spider
>Get existential as fuck
>Wonder if God sees humans as spiders, and tries to help us but keeps ruining everything because he doesnt know how to help us
>Cry
Gief meem
>>25341526
I did this as a child too, only thing it was with an ant and they killed it because I took it to the wrong ant hill.
shit story. why couldnt both you and the stupid arachnid die?
Been single for two years. It's been a good two years.
Been single for twenty-seven years. It's been a good twenty-seven years.
have you ever had a grill crush on you, /r9k/?
storytime
>still adjusting to high school (Canada, BC)
>it's frigid and snowy outside, imagine modern architecture with lots of orange/yellow lighting, wood, and lots of windows
>making my way to the cafeteria to get food with a friend
>hear giggling behind us
>look back
>see Ukrainian grill and her friend looking at us then me
>she gives me this sly smile
>ignore her like an autist having been oblivious to what she was on about
>get food (rice and chicken)
>various friends (and other people) later tell me that she's into me
fast forward
>in the air cadets with my brother
>he tells me that mom is giving someone a ride to the squadron
>"who is it"
>Ukrainian name - long Ukrainian surname
>it's her
>ride shotgun
>mom picks her up
>she smiles at me for longer than I was comfortable with
>she whispers "hey, anon"
>she sits in the back
>feel uncomfortable
>just loook ahead, staring at the dark road as the snow sweep across the windshield
>mom turns to me and her
>"do you two know each other, (her name)?"
>"i have (anon) in a few of my classes"
>mom says "yeah?" to me
>"yeah"
>ignore her like an autist some more
I turn into a shut in, drop out, and change schools later
see her after a few years later in a grocery store
>talks to me with the energy of a few suns
>ask me about me disappearing and such
>reciprocate as much as i can but withhold what actually happened
I've been avoiding that store for 2 years now.
Yes, and it always ends the same.
I chicken out and ignore it.
Holy shit I'm so insecure, ever since elementary school when everyone hated my guts I assumed I would always be a pariah, so instead of letting myself get hurt I decided to not take risks.
At all. My reasoning is that she doesn't really know me and I'd only attracted to my looks.
>>25341504
no. no one here has.
I was substitute teaching at a high school for a week. This one 16 year old girl in my class totally crushed on me hard. Awkward.
What's the point of life? What's the point of trying?
I don't enjoy doing anything anymore. Video games are boring, all the music sounds the same, tv shows are retarded.
Fuck life.
>>25341462
I agree, music used to be my only refuge apart from the internet. Then I realised it's just people making vibrations and that none of it is really that great, no matter how 2deep4me it is.
>>25341462
a reason to live
a vote for trump
>>25341462
>video games are boring
put down the CoD and start some fucking JRPGs or someshit senpai
It's almost a year now since I've become a NEET and I feel like I'm losing track of the time.
I'm slower in all my hobbies than I have ever been and think it's because my brain doesn't see any motivation or drive to do them anymore. I'm not sure what should I do.
How do you organize your NEET time /r9k/obots?
>>25341448
you don't.
welcome to the cycle of atrophy and entropy
>>25341547
Damn.
I'm not sure I want to go that path but then again it's not like I have any choice.
Fucking sucks man.
>>25341448
I'll tell you.
The days will melt away in a gooey mass and you will never feel days like you used to in school and so time will seep trough you endlessly in an untiring motion.
You will start drowing in time, gasping for a little time off of yourself but months and years have already passed before your eyes as if your life was on a TV show you just watched.
No moments etched in your memories, you will forget of anything you ever were, a shell of a human being. You have now become nothing, a non-factor in the Universe, no hope of ever being saved, life is only a dream to you.
Only your death could ever wake you up or bring peace to the endless commotion of you falling down to an endless abyss.
When life passes you by, it goes from feeling like it never really started to halfway over, and that there isn't enough time, and its too late to start.
>>25341443
nice 7th grade poetry there op
>>25341476
Its just a fleeting thought but nice shitposting memer. It hits you types the hardest and the latest.
>>25341509
lol you're trying so fucking hard
>tfw you only ever watch plebian tier anime
Pleb feel general i guess
any examples? I want to rate
>tfw never got braces
>tfw I can't ever confidently smile
you literally cannot be a robot if you have straight teeth
friendly reminder to brush at least twice a day, and floss every after meal, /r9k/!
you can do it!
>you literally cannot be a robot if you don't have my specific problem
Fuck off
>tfw got braces
>tfw teeth went back to shit
Well that was pointless
>>25341294
straight ass teeth from birth
cursed with acne tho
I dont see how its possible for someone to take shrooms and still be an asshole
Do they not feel disgusted with themselves?
What do you mean?
You have been muted for 4 seconds
>>25341272
Nobody cares about your shrooms you weak hippie
I'm gonna buy shrooms sometime soon.
![1451422843288[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/F5RXFiD.jpg "1451422843288[1]")
