Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 218. page
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Why are my eyes always puffy like pic related?
Is it just a robot thing?
You're not beeeing urself
>>29931012
Guesses about you:
- You have perpetual cold that never quite goes away
- You have terrible allergies
- You don't get enough sleep
- You cry a lot
At least one of those is probably true
>>29931252
Any details about that cold ? Im suffering from this and i have no idea what causes it.
>tfw when you have a legitimate and proper use of a tripcode in one thread, and are anonymous in other threads, but you sometimes forget to turn your tripcode off in the other code and look like a massive faggot in the other threads
>>29930954
One of us! One of us~! :3
>>29930954
why are you using a tripcode in the first place anon?
what makes you so special?
>tfw a tripcode isn't fun anymore, so you turn it off but people still recognize you because you post hundreds of times a day
>tfw been getting braindead levels of high for a straight two weeks now
Haha holy shit everything feels surreal now even when I'm not smoking or have come down. I love le weed! :^)
Enjoy psychosis friend.
>>29930944
I'm only responding to claim Junko as my waifu.
Cannibus is a panacea, welcome to the world of self identity, assuming your logiced your reasoning to rat8onalize all angpes of your needs being met and thoes that arent you are now currently activly finding solutions for
Hey guys, I made that post earlier, and I just lost my virginity.
All my depression is gone, and I'm officially happy now. Friend of mine saw my pictures filename and messaged me.
I'm leaving this board now that I'm no longer suicidal.
>>29930891
It's a amazing what losing your virginity can do to your psyche.
Godspeed anon, never come back here.
>>29930891
Good riddance, normie.
>>29930891
what post?
originalabc123
>get to know the 40 year-old man who works at the nearby gas station
>listen to his thoughts and feelings and get to know him as a person
>he rants about the women in his life who have abused him
>I tell him he could settle for a nice guy like me
>he says he's not into dudes and that I'm only 18 years old
>I tell him he has no right to be picky and that he shouldn't friendzone me
>he calls me a "creepo" and tells me to stop talking to him
>I try adding him on Facebook and send letters to his house
>never get a response
>mfw I'm going to the gas station tomorrow to shoot him
What did I do to deserve this?
>>29930879
>mfw i work at a gas station and this creepo kid hits on me all the time
fuck you i'm still in my 30s
>>29930879
You were born the wrong way, anon. youre broken. im so sorry. Youre better of dead.
>>29930879
Why would you take this man's life? He doesn't want to taste your boipucci!
TAYTAY literally picked the uglier, less wealthy, less aesthetic guy. Robots BTFO
>>29930878
Who cares. Taylor Swift is damaged goods with a body count of U.S Marine
>>29930878
Taylor Swift has been fucked by the half of Hollywood right now and continiously stated that Jake Gyllenhaal was the best she ever had.
what does btfo mean again?
Anyone else have this problem?
Im a 20 year old virgin and whenever i try to replicate a vagina like a banana peel, its just too much, like its just too immense and i cant orgasm without just fapping. So im scared when i actually have sex i wont be able to finish / have fun because of the immense amount of pleasure that just makes it uncomfortable.
You're not gonna have sex so don't worry about it.
>banana peel vagina
Does this actually work anons?
>>29930958
eat a banana, save the peel, inner wall of peel lubes dick
I've done it, but I probably wouldn't do it again. just buy some lube and some 20 dollar Japanese onahole and I'm sure it'll feel a lot better
>lurk for years
>start posting
>no (You)
I am a boring failure even in a sea of failured.
>phonepost for years
>lie and shitpost
>>29930857
Here's a pity (You), but you should work on the quality of your posts.
>>29930857
got (You) covered, i was looking for an excuse to post this anyway.
Here we share stories about exceptionally robot experiences
>1 year ago
>high school
>oneitis, couldn't be more perfect, is in my class, have been silent about my feels for her for about 7 years now
>about to quit school, decide it's now or never
>write passionate beta ass message to her on facebook explaining the situation
>no response
>figure "okay, I got the message across. I did what was necessary, I can finally feel better about myself now"
>she becomes very interested in me
>she starts up conversations on facebook
>at the ocassional party (i always sit in the corner with an asian doing geometry problems, I'm not kidding.. :/) she's also very interested in me
>decide to hsot one myself
>girlsfriends tell me "[femanon] wants to fuck you tonight she says, gotta make the move though"
>beta the fuck out and just talk to some guys all night
>she starts hanging out with a childhood friend instead
>oneitis of 7 years was interested in me, and is now (maybe?) fucking my childhood friend
>I wanna die
Wow it's almost like you did what 70% of guys under 25 would have done in that situation.
Wow it's almost like she was kind of a shallow bimbo the whole time despite being pretty
Wow it's almost like it's fucking nothing
>>29930808
She was actually shy, reserved, and not a bimbo. Spoke very rarely, might be robot girl. That was also why they said I had to make a move.
but my judgement may be clouded
Thanks for moral support anon
I feel that man. I had oneitis with my scene partner in the school play. ended up asking her to prom as a friend and she said yes. Then bestfriend swoops in and takes her from me. Now I don't talk to either of them.
But >>29930808 is right, it means literally nothing, man, She didn't really feel anything but lust for you. You'll find someone who actually cares some day.
And you probably can't see it now because of how alone you must feel, but whether you like it or not you're gonna find someone
I'm addicted to masturbation, can you help me?
Seriously, I'm not able to do no fap.
>>29930734
I'll help only if you post more feet
>>29930758
I'm pretty sure you can't help me, but fuck that, why not.
just fap once a day like a normal person. get a hobby if you need something to do instead of cum.
how can a human being live without love?
It can't, unless it has actual autism. Love is essential for every human being.
by not knowing what youre missing out on because you never experienced it
They cannot live a normal live without it, so without it your become a shell of a man and a outsider
My aunt wants to set me up with her niece.
What do I do? Should I go for it?
>>29930676
isn't that incest?
oeriufhaykf
>>29930676
Wouldn't that just be your cousin?(or I guess it could be your sister, even)
Go for it. At least maintain conversation, every friendship you make counts for the future, I got a career-tier job for just knowing some guy in middle school
>been obsessed with a girl online for 6 months
>found out where she lives
>its literally 5 minutes down the street
>too lazy to even try to stalk her
I even fail at being a creep wow
>>29930617
Stalking isn't healthy. I fight the urge to stalk my ex's Facebook every day and I'm tired of it
>>29930617
You need to drop this now
If you start hanging outside her house or following her, you will go down a road so dark it will take more strength than you can imagine to get out of it
Plus you run a high risk of eventually running into legal problems/jail
>>29930643
>>29930744
It's not like i would ever harm her or anything, I would maybe just take pictures of her and stuff. Is that too sketchy
https://www.google.com/search?q=leonardo+dicaprio+cargo+shorts&safe=off&biw=1366&bih=623&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi8ydqvrvHNAhVW2mMKHWx7AhIQ_AUICCgB
Is not giving a fuck about fashion and bucking current trends the ultimate red pill?
I'm like Leo, in that the clothes I wear aren't worn by trendies either, and I'm pretty red pilled.
You know what I mean?
>>29930589
He's just method acting. I've seen pictures of him looking like a liberal arts college professor.
>Posting celeb drama shit
>"Ooh I'm pretty red pilled guayz I dont care about treands notice me pls i like leo lol dont care bout system :))
Bluepill as shit normie scum.
>Is not giving a fuck about fashion and bucking current trends the ultimate red pill?
No. I've never given a shit about trends or fashion and I'm pretty bluepilled. If you are reading celebrity gossip, so are you. Fuck off and have a nice day.
>boyfriend, roommate, and I are driving around at night trying to find a Lapras on Pokemon Go
>sunrises and still no Lapras so we head back home
>when we get home, my other roommate was in kitchen wearing clothes and a wig to look at me
>he's super embarrassed and confesses that he wish he could sometimes be me since I'm sociable , talented in multimedia, and I'm fashionable
what are some other embarrassing things I can make him do?
It is not okay for him to be dressing up as me and I want to teach him a lesson. I already made him kiss my boyfriend.
>you want to punish him for being you
>so you let him kiss cuck you
Are you retarded?
Fuck off roastie cunt.
We don't fucking want you here.
>>>>>>>>>/b/
>>29930584
The roommate is straight so he wouldn't have liked it.
