Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1961. page
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Nng..here it comes, anon!
*BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP*
*stuffs nose in your crack*
Thank you mommy
I want to know what kind of fucked up things have to happen in a person's life for them to find a fucking fart seductive.
>>29109387
don't blame me, blame the universe
>Oh? What's wrong tubby? Too fast for you? Not used to direct sunlight? All right fine we'll take 5, 5 seconds.
>I may as well stretch while you're sucking air.... there we go...
*MMMPPPPPFFFPPPFFFRRRRRNNNNTTTTTTT*
>oh whoops! did you hear that? Did you smell it too? I had 4 raw eggs for breakfast haha, oh gosh you're probably breathing it right now aren't you....
*BLAAARRPP*
>haha one more for the road, now suck it upand hurry up faggot let's get that heart rate up.
>>29109154
>make sure you stretch before running anon, don't want to get a cramp
*BBBBRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPP*
>Ugh guess that stretched me out, teehee!
>>29109223
where do you get these pics? i'm having a boner
>>29109223
>running in barefeet
put these on at least please!
>Take photo of myself in underwear that I've stuffed to make it look like I have a huge dong
>Send it to girls I know
>Some of them will want to have sex with me because they'll think I have a huge dong
>By the time we get naked they'll realize I have an average dong but it will probably be too late cause they're already horny
Do you think this would work?
>>29109137
Yup laptop
It's very very unlikely this doesn't work.
You can literally not fail.
OP YOU ARE A BRILLIANT MAN
what is the longest you managed to stop fapping
80 days here
tried this month and just lost once again
feels bad
>>29109024
There's a lot of nofap shills on r9k today.What's the deal, is there some nofap holiday or something?
But 40 days. Gave it up for lent sophomore year of high school when I was still Catholic
>>29109024
enjoy that prostate cancer
two months and then I started looking at porn and rubbing my dick through my boxers and somehow what I was looking at caused me to cum immediately, luckily I don't remember what that picture was
I'm really pissed at my family, they treated me like dog shit and shamed me because im a NEET last christmas. Then at my last wedding people laughed at me, I don't know why I keep trying to even be apart of society and family when people won't let me fucking make it. Fuck everybody dude. What do you guys think I should do?
>inb4 kill myself
>inb4 go on a rampage
>inb4 just get a job
I plan on doing SOMETHING this fall, whether it be kill myself, go to school, or be a wagecuck, im gonna do something, but im never gonna forgive my family, I mean how can they treat me like that when all ive ever done was try to be good to them even if i am NEET?
>>29109022
I hate to ask, but how wealthy are your family? If they're not rich than you've literally been denying them things they want to enjoy day in and day out for years so they can pay to sustain you. They've literally been putting you first and you won't forgive them for being frustrated? I know you didn't ask to be born but they didn't ask for you to be born like this, either.
Try bitching out your family
>>29109102
Eh were semi wealthy. I'm not taking up that much money, just been living with my parents. I will post a pic of our house in a second. This is mainly extended family like my half siblings and their kids and my cousins.
>>29109133
I want to man, I just don't know what to say besides fuck you all go to hell which I think is a worse plan than just doing my own thing and killing myself once I inherit my familys money. I think thats mainly what this is about, me and my sister are in line to inherit a lot more money than them because their mom divorced our dad. So basically they get 1/5th share of only my dads money when he dies and me and my sister each get 1/5th not including my mothers side of the family. They want it to all be equal, honestly they are greedy little fuckers and i hate every single one of them. When I get my money I'm either gonna burn it and kill myself or give it all to my sister and kill myself. I fucking hate everyone.
>meet friend and his fiance on Saturday
>the fiance mentions some girl they know at one point
>says she's 24 and has never had a boyfriend in her life
>I quip "neat, do you have her number?"
>sudden epiphany visible on fiance's face
>she suddenly becomes extremely keen on hooking me up with that friend of theirs
>keeps trying to sell me on the idea over the past few days
>shows me her pictures (solid thin 6.5/10, maybe a 7), talks her up however she can
>says we should meet this weekend
What do you think robots? I've decided to give it a try just to see what's the deal.
>>29108973
If you're interested you should do it.
What's the worst that can happen?
>>29109153
>What's the worst that can happen?
That's largely what I'm interested in.
>>29109170
Have you talked to this girl yet?
Do you know of any common interests?
If you don't have anything in common, the worst that can happen is that you meet a grill that just isn't for you.
If you do, the worst that can happen is you fuck it up, turbo-autismo style.
>tfw you have a Vietnam vet father
>>29108970
Did you ask him why they didn't win?
>>29108970
>tfw your parents are too young to remember the Vietnam War
Is he a fortune son?
Ever done group sex or lewd stuff with a group before?
>Ever done lewd stuff before?
no
yea haha some of us robots from a meetup had a kind of orgy after the ugly manlet normies left
>>29108978
2/10 B8
This wasnt iriginal
What's it like to have a cute girl crush on you?
>>29108853
if it's one sided? awful. You don't feel anything for her yet you still feel bad about rejecting her because of the cuteness.
>>29108853
like this
but originally, of course
To some of us the notion of anything like that is impossible, if not blasphemous. We can't say because we don't think it/should be possible.
robots i have come to this board to make a humble request: if you like ironic, edgy images made in ms paint, then this page is for you. See "The Shekel Wizards Memes" on Facebook.
bump this shit for the love of cthullu
not a bad page at all.
8/8 made me reply, not bad at all my dood
Who is the cutes loli ?
1 obviously a boy and males can't be loli.
why they all look like that bitch eliza
>>29108824
Wow I have never seen the full picture.
It hurts, I wish she never came here.
So what actually happens at a club?
Dancing? Drinking? Lewd stuff?
Getting so drunk you forget how little fun you're having
On the positive side, you can also get so drunk that you can talk to people you ordinarily wouldn't and it's completely socially acceptable
>>29108775
Hearing damage.
>Drink
>Dance half-assedly until a girl smiles at you
>Dance half-assedly with a girl
>Try to get to know each other but it's too loud
Also this >>29108877
Days without Fapping: Day 6
Stargate 117-E Captain's Log:
>Day 1:
Has it been a Day already, EZ GG Too much water/10
>Day 2:
1 Day without fapping feels like an entire week
>Day 3
I am growing weak, Feelings of withdrawal are kicking in. Very quick to Erect, wake up cuddling pillow
>Day 4
First signs of Regret are setting in, I feel as if there's a weight attached to my Dick, Withdrawel symptoms of obsessive compulsion has arrived, Anxiety full blown. Think about qt grills to fap to constantly. Temptation to break is getting stronger by the hour
>Day 5
I have no concept of Time in my Penis. It feels as if an entire Year has passed since my last fappening. First of Wet Dreams, Anxiety, Temptation on the 8/10 scale. Mental State: Still Strong, Physical State: Strong Cravings, Tired for no reason, Compulsive boners for no reason. Feelings of loneliness have set in.
>Day 6: Today
Perpetual Boners, Awoke this morning with an extremely vivid dream of the best possible sex, and sex scenario ever. The world has changed so much, I am a new person. I've learned to value grills, because now every grill looks 2 points hotter. a 4 is now a 6, a 2 a 4, and a 7 a 9. Luckily I Haven't snapped yet, will to continue not fapping is non existent other than just doing it. Depression, alot of it. Melancholy apathy. I'm bored for no reason, even went outside to skateboard and landed new tricks perfectly for first time. I didn't care. I didn't even think about getting hurt. I have so much excess energy, I've been so productive today. I think it's all from the excess Testosterone building up inside of me, I feel like Superman. I'm much more capable than I was a few days ago of accomplishing though demanding. I feel like a new person. I'm both Energized and Melancholic at the same time. Anxiety has subsided, but Loneliness is still very evident. Thinking about even asking grill out IRL, juss to cuddle with. Will update tomorrow @ 9 am ish
I'm a fap addict, ask me Anything
When was the last time you had social interaction with a grill?
>>29108736
Godspeed anon
i haven't been able to do no fap since I was in highschool. How do you get over boners?
>>29108998
not long, I have girl friends, just not any girl friends
How do I learn to enjoy multiplayer games?
if you don't already enjoy them, why do you want to?
>>29108716
So that I have something to talk about on /v/.
>>29108745
>>29108643
IKTF
>play csgo for 500 hours
>still suck
>never played comp
>never used my mic
send help
1. Go to localbitcoin and buy some bitcoin locally
2. Go to some Tor site and by a sheet of LSD tabs
3. take 1/8th of a tab everyday
And that's it. Right?
>>29108616
Bupropion 300mg XL and a tight bodied little Russian gf cured my depression
>>29108638
>Bupropion 300mg XL
how do you feel after taking this? I know it increases dopamine in the cleft in the frontal cortex, so this should improve focus and motivation. does it work like that for you?
>>29108685
I take it with adderall 20mg xr cause I have ADHD too, so I can't quite tell. However it has been extremely effective in helping me keep my thoughts in control with little to no side effects.
Have you taken it?
