Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8055. page
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My gf has a really high sex drive, and I was raised Catholic so masturbating or sexual desires were shamed so I stayed a virgin for a while, didn't lose it til I was 20 (21 now). Hence why I am a robot.
Is there any way I can get back into that sexually driven mindset? Even weird cartoon open doesn't get me going, and I just want to make her happy.
"My gf"
"for a while"
"I am a robot."
Get over the whole god thing. I stopped believing in it when I was in 3rd grade but I was in catholic school all the way through high school so I was studying scripture. I didn't know what atheism was until I got to high school. Letting go of those beliefs is really liberating. Studying philosophy was also very helpful. Once you get past Descartes, libenez, and Spinoza pretty much the only one who advocates theism is keirkergaard and he's a fucking asshole who was full of shit. Also he would say that you don't actually have faith and he's better than you.
>>24569025
Just do it, and don't focus, try to BE pleased. You're brain will do the rest.
are youtube poops still a thing? if so, how autistic are they now?
LOTSA SPAGHETTI
GAY LUIGI
MUH BOY
My understanding is that it is still existent, but a way smaller audience. It seems like a lot of trash people have rotated over to mocking those video game montages and that culture? doritos, mlg, call of duty, trap, etc.
It hasbeen like that for years, but it seems to be really popular now for some reason. I wouldn't suspect the Youtube community would be interested in irony but if you watch these videos, it is apparent that they are on par with the stupidity of YTP.
tl;dr Traditional YTPs exist still, but to a smaller demographic of viewers/creators and have been replaced by similar stupid ironic clips mocking video game montages.
always a classic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDYgwqsHnRA
>get some stacey as a lab partner
>she assumes it's your job to be her emotional tampon and/or beta orbiter
>instructors don't change your partner because you "have to know how to deal with all kinds of people in the workforce"
Jesus fucking christ, staceys should be banned from any STEM field. Terrible experiences with Stacesy you don't know thread I guess
>"have to know how to deal with all kinds of people in the workforce"
That's not their job. Their job is to give you instruction in the subject matter and make sure you are able to utilize/master the material.
>>24568934
But if you're her tampon at least you get to be inside her vagina.
>>24569271
Only her metaphorical vagina, anon. :-/
>"Okay, next up is Anon's presentation. What is your chosen topic, Anon?"
dead nigger scat porn
My topic s how technical communication manifests itself in Runescape
>>24568948
is that Bear Grylls?
eye contact with a girl is so scary, man. It's worse than making eye contact with a muscly dude.
how do i overcome my irrational fear of the female gender?
I am never going to get laid because of this
Is tjat the gentleman himself amongst other people? Amongst women?
>>24568570
not wanting to make eye contact with women probably stems from you thinking you are ugly and not wanting them to look at you
i love making eye contact with hot girls it gets me HARD AS FUCK even though i never ever talk to them
>make eye contact with girl
>get lost in her eyes
I didn't ask for this.
>TFW MY GF IS ONLY 9/10
I DESERVE A 10/10 STACY GF RIGHT NOW
RRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Take advantage of the opportunity to fuck her before she finds out about Chad, faggot.
>TFW MY GF WASNT A VIRGIN BEFORE ME
IT'S FUCKING AWFUL BUT IM TOO DESPERATE TO LEAVE
woops she already found out about chad
Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green have a half-open relationship. This means that Megan is free to date other men, while Brian must remain exclusive to Megan.
>>24568274
Brian Austin Green?
More like Brian Autism Green
>>24568311
I see what u did there xDD
>>24568311
I wish he had a name that was easier to insert "cu'ck" into.
So far I have not come up with anything.
Post an image that summarizes r9k better than this one.
Protip: you can't
like this one
>failure as a human being
Stop spooking me
I'd say it summarizes the people who post those hourly NEET threads pretty well.
Also, people hate those guys, it's the reason why they keep coming back and reposting the same thread over and over again.
ALL THE NORMIES ON THE FLOOR
*bang* *bang*
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I-l swear to god l'm a /fit/bot, l'll help you get shredded s-senpai
Don't shoot! I am a fembot!
Would blending junk food be a good way to go from skeletor to "average weight"
If you're autistic enough to deal with what is literally the worst thing I've ever tasted in my life, then yeah blend up a happy meal, coke and all
>>24568017
I figured the taste would be awful, but I just thought "Ayy it'll help me put on weight faster, right?"
Just eat a pure shitload of protein filled foods and exercise a bit on the side, gain some muscle while you're at it, why the hell not?
Also apparently once you're in the habit of exercise it gets more enjoyable.
>tfw thought ftw meant fuck the world
>>24567920
kek
When did you put it all together op?
>>24567956
2009 when i looked it up on urbandictionary
>>24567990
what got you to the point of looking it up?
is it possible to suppress your autism when interaction with other humans, especially the female kind?
>>24567869
>especially the female kind?
No. Interaction with the opposite sex only unleashes your autism.
>>24567884
god damn it, it cannot be hidden somehow?
>>24567930
You can only hope they're more autistic than you. Your goal in any conversation where you're trying to impress someone, suppress your autism, etc. is to take control of it and make the other person feel comfortable with it. This is generally harder with the opposite sex because they're more alien to you, and if you're a sperg, you're unlikely to have the social know-how and self-awareness to be able to dominate a conversation successfully.
Who /hates parents/ here?
I just found out that my mother could have got welfare but she didn't apply so the family had to come by with my father's meager salary only. I never got pocket money or any presents or any shit bought by them. Always had to scrap pennies to buy the cheapest clothes if I didn't want to wear my cousins' old ones. No phone until 15 (present from aunt), no own computer, no bike, no all the other shit teens care about. All just because my mother was to proud and lazy to claim welfare and go to the job centre every two weeks.
>>24567854
>no phone until 15
>having a phone at 15 years old
>hates his mommy
Little boy you could have it much worse.
Pride is a virtue. You should learn from your mother, OP.
>>24567892
my parents didnt let me have money, i didnt have computer so i used to draw shit and play with my hands (make little persons, storys and other stuff) then one day she was angry and as always i was in trouble again. i spend 3 onths and more in my room, just get out to eat and bath nothing else, i have always been a loner but since that summer, that summer, since then thing are much worse. i was 11 adn i lvie in a fucking eternal spring small city, FUCK and thats just one story
>tfw the depression slowly became anger over the years
I feel like I would get physical if anybody ever stepped into my shit
Fuck off you fucking bitch. You fucking piece of shit.
>>24567682
Yeah it happens. Even people around me have started telling me I'm way too negative and bitter. Not sure if that's how it's supposed to be, anger should have been the first stage, right?
>>24567768
Right? Idk if that's okay or not. All I know is that it feels better than feeling down all the time.
I punched my brother in the face and called him a jerkass b/c he's always been kinda cold to me and you know what? I feel kinda sorry now but I'm glad I did it, he's been much nicer to me since.
I'm an asshole, but who isn't?
>>24567855
Yeah I've been mostly asshole to strangers. Like this time I was walking and this roastie was running against me. I was walking about I don't know 8" from a wall on one side. She could have easily dodged me, but no the dumb bitch just kept running in the same direction and expected me to go out of her way. Well I didn't and since I weight 200lbs and she was typical cardio bunny she ended up being pushed into the wall and must have hit her elbow pretty bad. She called me a dick but the look on her face. The look of utter disbelief that inferior male did not go out of her way was priceless.
I also was once in a pub(yeah I still have people that consider me friends) and this gypsy guy came in selling roses. You know the type he comes in selling roses to guys in girlfriends so the guys can't turn him down. I got mad and called him dirty fucking gypsy scum out loud.
I don't know. Maybe I just have anger issues. Surprisingly I didn't get my ass kicked yet.
be honest robots, which one of you was this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUCUsNx1HTs
>>24567668
video is fake
>>24567668
OP, I know you'll find this hard to believe but that is fake. It was confirmed fake actually, they just had really good acting, I didn't believe it at first because why waste all the food and ruin the dishes but apparently anybody will do anything for attention.
>>24567721
>>24567701
i know its fake but i also know that there are almost definitely people on here with quite similiar expierences
